Author's note: Thank you for the reviews! It was kind of hard writing this chapter, the last scene in particular, because it's one of the most important of the story. Let me know what you think, I really want to know if you like it. I think the next chapter will be the last one, so review, please!

Chapter 8: They can't compete

The two weeks after that evening were quite enough: simple cases at work, no problems at home and with Derek….well, it hadn't happened anything. Now was Derek who was avoiding her, not because he was angry or something like that, but because he didn't know if he could keep himself from kissing and touching her or more than that….Meredith knew that, because she felt the same way, so she didn't try to talk to him, even if she missed him like hell. The most beautiful thing was that she was actually starting to trust him again. The way he was acting showed her how much he cared about her…..she hadn't forgotten how fantastic he had been the last time they saw each other out of the hospital, at her house, when they were actually crossing the line…..he really wanted her that night, she felt it, and she wanted him as well. They could have had great sex…..but he had stopped himself because what he really wanted was being with her forever and not just for one night…now Meredith loved him more than before.

But there was something that bothered her: she often saw Derek with Addison. They didn't do anything wrong, they just talked and she shouldn't have been disturb by that….but she was in some way. It was stupid. She wasn't the kind of woman who doesn't want her man to talk to his ex….Derek and Addison had been married for eleven years, they couldn't just quit talking, she knew that…she understand that. But that didn't change the fact she feel hurt. Maybe it was because she didn't know what they were talking about…..yeah, it was definitely that. She wanted to know everything about Derek….she wanted to be able to say that she actually knew him .But maybe she wouldn't never know him the way Addison did. And that really hurt her.

- I have a big gossip- said Cristina sitting at her table at lunch

- What gossip?- asked Meredith without too much curiosity.

- You know Alex and Izzie are dating, right?-

- They're not dating…..they go out sometimes- Meredith corrected her.

- I call it dating-

- Izzie doesn't. She lost Danny a month ago, she isn't still ready for that-

- Whatever. The big news is that Alex finally told her he loves her-

- Really?-

- Yeah. Maybe if they got back together she'll come back to work-

- I don't know Cristina….how did she react?-

- I don't know that, you should ask her-

- Yeah…I hope she'll come back to work as well, but I don't think it'll happen so fast- Meredith observed.

Cristina rolled her eyes. – Today you're more pessimist than usual-

- I'm just realistic. And you're more optimistic than usual today -

- Burke is doing progresses, really great progresses. So yes, Cristina Yang will be cheerful today-

Meredith laughed: it was very rare seeing Cristina like that…and strange too. But she liked it.

- I'm really happy for him…and for you too- she said

- Now it's your turn. What's up?- Cristina asked.

Meredith sighed – Nothing….it's stupid-

- Do you think I care? I want to know now!-

- Ok, calm down….It's just….I think that Addison has a connection with Derek that I won't never be able to have. And it hurts me-

- You're right…..you're really stupid-

- Cristina!-

- Meredith, you and McDreamy have the best chemistry on this planet! It's palpable-

- But Addison knows more things about him than I do-

- You knows him better than you think-

- How can you be so sure?-

- I am, stop. I'm Cristina. I know everything-

Meredith rolled her eyes and smiled – You're sooo modest!-

Later Meredith was filling a patient's chart.

- Hi- she knew who the voice was of before looking at him

- Dr Shepherd- she said

- Dr Shepherd? Is something wrong?-

Perfect: she didn't know him, but he really knew her. When something about him bothered her, she called him Dr Shepherd.

- Everything's fine. It's just…you know, we're at work- she lied.

He didn't seem to believe her, but he let the thing go.

- Are you busy tonight?- he asked

- I don't think so, why?-

- I was wondering if you could come back home with me. To my trailer-

He had actually asked her that. They hadn't talked each other for two weeks and now he was asking her something like that

- Derek, I don't know….why should I?-

- I have to tell you something….actually I have to show you something-

Meredith was watching him curiously – What should you show me?- she asked

- What is it? An interrogatory? Please, just come-

He seemed to really care about that secret thing.

- Ok, I'll come-

He smiled….crap, she just wanted to kiss him when he smiled.

- So, see you later- he said and he walked away. Meredith sighed…..everyday keep self control was harder.

Derek had driven her to his trailer silently. Meredith felt agitated…..sometimes she really hated surprises. When they were in the trailer she asked - So, what did you want to show me?-

- Wait and you'll see- he opened a drawer and took a file. He gave Meredith it- Look- he simply said.

She couldn't believe it: it was a copy of divorce papers, signed by both Derek and Addison.

Signed. This time divorce papers were signed.

We signed it yesterday. I did everything I could to make it faster and I have to say that Addison really helped-

Meredith was speechless. He wasn't married anymore. Suddenly she understood why he talked with Addison so often

- So….you and Addison…when you were talking lately….was about the divorce?- she asked hesitantly.

- Yes. It's not so simple getting a divorce. There are a lot of issues, you know…..but now everything's over, Mer. She's not my wife anymore-

She didn't know why, but she started to cry. Derek looked at her confused

- Mer…why are you crying? What's wrong?- he asked leaning to her.

- I'm so stupid! I was upset because you talked with her so much and instead you were….oh, I'm so stupid!-

Derek hugged her – It doesn't matter, it's okay now-

- No, it's not okay-

- Don't cry…shh….don't cry- he said stroking her hair.

After a while Meredith calmed down. She looked at Derek – I'm sorry Derek-

- Don't be sorry….it's my fault if you can't trust me-

- No, it's not that…you've been perfect lately, really. And now I know you care about me, I know you won't hurt me intentionally, I know that.-

- Do you?-

- I do. I think I can trust you…..I think I can try to be us again. I want it-

Derek gave her a wonderful smile – Meredith….that's great!-

- But…- she continued

- There's a but, of course- he said while his smile died down.

- I think I can't compete with Addison-

- What? I don't understand….-

- Let me finish: I know you love me, really, but Addison has been your wife for eleven years…eleven years, Derek. She knows you, she knows your family. How can I compete with her? I just can't…..and it hurt me so much, because- she stopped for a moment…..she hadn't said what she was going to say since he had broken her heart.

- Meredith?- he called, touching her arm. She shivered.

- Because….I love you….I love you so much Derek that it hurts- she confessed, her voice was a whisper.

He smiled – I was waiting so much for you to say that again-

She didn't say anything.

- Meredith, all you said it's true….but it's also wrong-

- What do you mean?-

- It's true that Addison has been my wife for eleven years, that she knows me…..but the Derek she knows doesn't exist anymore. She knows the old me, the man who worked all day and wasn't never with his wife, the man who thought his best friend was the love of his life and married her when they were both too young. I'm not that person anymore, Meredith. When I moved to Seattle and I met you I've become a different men….a men who loves ferryboat, who likes living in a trailer and not in a big house, a men who prefer spending time with the people he loves instead of working all day, who knows that the true love of his wife is a beautiful intern who made his heart beating fast like a woman has never made. Addison doesn't know this man…..you do, Meredith. You know this man…..you know me. It's not true you can't compete with Addison…..she can't compete with you….. Nobody can compete with you-

Meredith smiled between tears….she didn't need time, space or anything else anymore: she just needed him. She put an hand on his chest and looked him deeply….they didn't need words. They kissed hard, starving of each other. She unbuttoned his shirt and let it fall on the ground, staring his perfect body – You know, you're too sexy…it's dangerous having a boyfriend so sexy, I bet all the girls in the hospital dream of having sex with you-

He laughed and sat on the bed attracting Meredith towards him – They can't compete, remember?-

Meredith smiled and kissed him hard, putting an hand trough his hair – Yeah, they can't-