--- The Phoenix Chronicles ---
Chapter 15 - Shattered Pride
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Phoenix sighed to himself, as he dispatched the his foes with ease. He had left Ichiba-Sei close to a week ago, and had just been passing by the planet he currently stood on when he overheard a Cold Empire transmission, and noticed the swarm of space pods descending upon the planet. Apparently, this was to be the next world they were going to conquer. Phoenix, however, had other ideas. Quickly changing the trajectory of his ship, he'd landed on the planet not long after the Cold Empire raiding troupes had begun, and he'd set about stopping them. By force.
He'd only been here a matter of minutes, but already he'd killed or maimed no less than twenty people. 'Just how weak are these people', he mused to himself, 'that they would send weaklings like this to deal with them?' Obviously, the people of this planet, whose name he'd missed in the transmission, weren't considered a big threat, or they would have seen more than shock troupes. He was amused slightly to notice the denizens of the planet were cat people, but he put it out of his mind for now; right now, he had Cold Empire soldiers to kill, and a planet to save.
Suddenly, he noticed a 'buzzing' ki from somewhere to his left; that was the only term he could think of to describe it. It was clearly agitated, and the 'frequency' of agitation shouted one thing to him; it was afraid, and deathly so. Spinning to face the direction of the ki, and absently batting a few blasts back at their owners, he spotted the person; a girl, with green hair, sitting in the middle of the road, staring at the tall tower in who's shadow she sat. Following her line of sight, he quickly spotted the cause for her fear: a cluster of soldiers, destroying the ground level of the building.
As he started to race over, he noticed, out of the corner of his eye, the building start to topple in her direction, and, if he didn't get her out of the way, she'd be crushed. When he reached her, he quickly saw why she hadn't simply run: she wasn't just sitting in the middle of the road, her legs were trapped under debris. He knew that he wouldn't have enough time to both remove the debris, and get them clear of the falling building, so he went for plan 'B'. He smirked to himself; he always loved plan 'B'.
Standing in front of the fallen girl, he drew his hands back, forming balls of ki in both. 'Well, I wanted to save this,' Phoenix mused to himself, 'But now's as good a time as any to test it out...' Throwing his arms forward, he merged the two balls of ki, aiming the new ball at the falling building; more specifically, the part of building that would, in mere seconds, be crushing them like bugs if this didn't work. Smirking again, he shouted, "Inferno Blast!"
A massive beam of red ki shot forth, impacting the building and blowing a massive hole in the approaching side, before continuing through, and coming out the other side. He quickly moved to shield the girl from further falling debris, as the building crashed down around them with a resounding slam. When the shaking stopped, he removed himself from shield duty, ripping the debris covering her legs before smiling down at her and asking, "Are you okay?"
Shakily climbing to her feet, she replied, "I... I think so. My legs hurt a bit, but other than that..." Looking around, she asked, "How are we gonna get out of here?"
He shrugged, "You should probably remain here until the attack is over, but if you want a way out..." He trailed off, raising his left hand and aiming it at one of the walls, before firing off a blast that bore it's way through the ruined building. Sensing another distressed ki close by, he started to take to the air, saying, "Good bye and good luck, miss..."
"Tabitha," she called out, "My friends call me Tabby."
He smiled again, flying off as he said, "Take care Tabby." As he blasted off, charging a blast and flinging it through one of the windows of the second tower before zipping inside, he never noticed the faint blush that came to the young green-haired catgirl's face, as she thought about her hero, the teen who left no name, who she would come to learn of as 'Phoenix'.
Phoenix scowled to himself as he flew back to the war-torn city, leaving the girl known as Kat on the hillside, part of him feeling decidedly ashamed, and the other part angry at feeling like that; he'd done nothing wrong! She had kissed him; a fairly chaste kiss, but a kiss nonetheless. As much as he wanted to believe otherwise, telling himself he felt nothing, that he had a mate back on Vegeta-Sei, he had... enjoyed it, the feeling of being close to someone again, hence the ashamed feeling.
And therein lay his dilemma. He knew, somewhere inside, that he would probably never see his would-be mate again; after all, it wasn't safe for him to return to Vegeta-Sei. And yet, despite the fact they had not bonded yet, and wouldn't have for another standard year at least, his Saiyan instincts told him that he was spoken for, and would not be with anyone else. Sighing, he resigned himself to spending the rest of his years alone, and put the thought out of his mind; there were more important things. Like the small garrison still in the city, just waiting for him to kill them. He just wished his heart didn't hurt so much...
o-o-o
On the surface, it appears to be a normal day aboard the Icebreaker, as it sped toward the location of the next dragon ball. Frost, sitting as his command console, has made sure the ship is away with all speed it can muster, to make up for time lost on the previous world. The ever-stoic Flute remains nearby, to correct navigation if the need arises. His female counterpart is deep in meditation further inside the ship, and the sniper Avery diligently works his station. But, for the remaining three occupants of the ship, it is far from a normal day.
The Saiyan warrioress Pi currently waits outside the training room, trying to get inside. Her mate is currently inside, and, judging from the readout on the terminal nearby, has been since before she got up. Also according to the terminal, he's training under near suicidal conditions; when they were last training, they maxed out at 200g's, but the room is currently set to 500, with the temperature in the room at fifty degrees below zero, over double their previous settings. And the doors have been programmed locked, only opening when he either finishes, or passes out, whichever happens first.
From the condition of the room's only occupant, both seem equally likely. The conditions inside could best be described as hell frozen over; what little moisture there is in the air has frozen, leaving clumps of ice on the walls, ceiling and floor, as well as Kaen's own body, but he notices none of these. He had ascended two hours ago, halfway into his training, when the force of gravity became to great for his normal form to stand. The training bots have been off for about half an hour now, when, after three and a half hours, he no longer had enough energy to divide it three ways; one to keep from being crushed, another to keep from being frozen alive, and the third to create/dodge ki blasts. And his internal state is no better than the room that contains him.
Despite what his male companions believed, it wasn't his ego that had taken the greatest damage, although that did hurt; it was his warrior's pride. He had lost, a feat that had only ever happened five times before in his lifetime, but this time was much worse. Every other time he had suffered a blow to his pride by losing, his opponent had been as strong, if not stronger, than he himself at the time, and while it galled him that he had lost, at least then he had an excuse; now, he had none. He was the stronger, the faster, yet still he was beaten, and beaten badly; if he lost, he could always count on the fact they'd be hurting as much as he, but he would have been lucky if he'd so much as scratched Recoome, the man at least three times his inferior.
With this new loss came the nightmares, returning stronger than before; before, being in Pi's presence quietened his raging demons, but now not even that helped. This was the second time he'd been in the room today; he'd only left for long enough to heal in the regeneration tanks before heading straight back in, making it currently at least 12 hours since he'd last eaten, quite a feat for any Saiyan, considering how hard he was working. The first time had been while Pi still slept, after his demons had awoken him. Now, he didn't just dream of Pi being killed; no, now he dreamed of her being killed while he watched, knowing he wasn't strong enough to save her, and his wounded pride suffered another blow each and every time.
He had once been the perfect warrior hadn't he? Nothing to lose, everything to gain; no weaknesses, no regrets. Then she came back into his life, declaring she'd never let him go again, and he let her back in. And with her came a weakness; he now had something to lose, something that losing would destroy him. He had lost her once already, but with that loss came great strength, the likes of which he'd only ever dreamed of, and yet, it still wasn't enough. His own pride, his own belief in his strength, had made him cocky, and it almost cost him his life; for all intensive purposes, he had attempted suicide, and almost succeeded, which was more than his wounded pride could handle.
Now, he was second-guessing every decision he'd ever made. Did he do the right thing, starting up this one-man war, this vendetta, against Frieza and his Cold Empire? Was it a good idea to save the thirteen worlds from Frieza he had, or should he have just wiped them out completely? Was he justified in the eighteen counts of genocide on his soul? Did he do the right thing when he accepted Pi back into his life, or should he have continued flying solo, knowing that he would only bring her pain? Every one of these questions, especially the last one, cut deeply into his soul; he was a Saiyan, he shouldn't have regrets, especially when it came to mating and killing, but, with his pride shattered by one too many blows, he did, and anger followed them.
He was angry at Frieza, for being the main cause of his problems. He was angry at Vegeta, for sending him on a mission he had to have known was a trap. He was angry at his late enemy, for being the first person to not only beat him, but beat him several times. He was angry at Recoome, for beating him, and making doing so look easy. He was angry at the Fates, for taking his older brother from him, and angry at his brother for going. He was angry at his mate, for worming her way back into his heart, and angry at himself for second-guessing his decision to accept her. But most of all, he was angry at himself, at his own inadequacies, at his own weakness.
It is this pure anger that Pi can feel through their bond, blocking out everything else, even who it's directed at. Every so often there's a sharp spike in his anger, and his ki along with it, but it always ebbs away before too long, and while his anger never seems to drop below the point she started feeling it, every time the spikes ebb his ki is lower, and she knows it won't be much longer before it's too much.
Her own concern and anger flow through the bond back to him as she pounds on the reinforced Saiyan-proof door, calling, "Let me in Kaen or I'll blast this door open," but silence is her only response through the haze of his anger; either the cloud of rage was too great for her words and feelings to penetrate, or he chose to ignore them both. Within moments, however, the training computer whirs, and, seemingly deciding he's had enough, returns the gravity and temperature to normal, announcing in a far-too cheery voice, "Training completed. Please allow thirty minutes for droid recovery and rebuilding. Have a nice day!"
When the doors open he storms out, his face an emotionless mask, with another target to had to his anger list; the computer, for booting him out before he said he was finished. Well, he would have been storming out if he could do as much as stand steadily on his own two feet. His body suit is rolled down to his waist, and his bare chest, which should, by all rights, be drenched with sweat, is instead covered with small patches of ice, which are now starting to melt in the warmer temperature; all bar the body suit and boots he currently wears are still back in their room.
Pi, however, stood directly in his way, her feet planted, and a very intent look on her face, the kind she always wore when she wanted something and wasn't taking 'no' for an answer. Barely so much as glancing at her he started to walk around her, at least as best as he could manage in his weakened state, but she moved to block him, barking angrily, though still with the undertone of concern, "You were in there for the better part of the day Kaen. Why are you doing this to yourself?"
Stopping, he looked up at her, instead of the floor he'd been staring at to help guide his walk, his eyes cold, with occasional flashes on anger hidden under the surface, as he stared directly into hers. After standing in silence for a moment he replied, his voice devoid of all emotion, "I'm training. What does it look like? Now, I'm going to get into one of the regen tanks while I still have enough strength to stand under my own power."
"You're acting like a fool." When he didn't reply, merely gazing at her impassively, she lowered her gaze to look at the floor, adding in a quieter voice, "We hardly even train like we used to any more Kaen. Has so much changed we can't even do that?"
His voice softened slightly, although it was nowhere near that it used to, as he replied, "I'm not the boy you knew back on Vegeta-Sei anymore." This said, he began to walk/stagger off again, but before he could take three shaky steps, she kicked his legs out from under him, and planted her foot on his chest.
"I know you've changed, so have I, but my love for you never will. I did not come hunting after you to be left behind again, not in person, nor in power. If you want to beat yourself to a pulp to get stronger, than I want to do it too; just let me in! Do you think you're the only one here who wants to get stronger?"
He made no effort to rise, seeming as content on the floor as if it was his choice to be there all along, before saying, his voice full of emotion for the first time today, "I don't just want to get stronger, I need to get stronger; it's all I've got left! I have lost practically everything I ever had, bar a war I cannot win, and a love I cannot protect, because I was too weak, and if I don't get stronger I'll lose them too..."
She knelt beside him, laying a hand on his cheek. "You don't need to protect me Kaen; you never had to. You know that when we fought together we were always stronger. I only want to help you, if you will let me." With that, she placed her hands over his chest as she began to heal him, a power she'd discovered during her travels, although her actions were a little shaky due to the overwhelming emotions currently flowing through her.
He growled, "I don't need your help." Contrary to his words, however, he made no effort to stop her. The raw anger still flowed strongly through the bond, but it was beginning to fade, a subtle statement that he was considering accepting help. 'Maybe, just this once, I can accept her help,' he thought to himself, 'Maybe she does understand...'
His thought was broken abruptly, as, while continuing to heal him, she said dryly, "Your pride doesn't want me to help, you mean."
With this, the anger returned full force. It would appear he was wrong; she didn't fully understand. This time he did push her away, growling his reply, "I shouldn't need help, period. How am I ever going to beat that albino bastard once and for all if I'm always dependant on others?"
Her anger became apparent as well as she shot back, "Is it wrong to have another help you? To have me help you?" Her second statement had a pleading undertone to it that didn't go unnoticed.
He stood up, more steady than before after both her healing and a moment of rest, and his anger flared for a moment before he got it back to a controllable level, saying, "Don't you get it? This is my war, my vendetta; it was thrust upon me. You may have chosen to tag along, but you had a choice; I didn't. This war is all I've had for twelve months of my life. It is the only reason I kept going; the idea that I might be able to make a difference. But despite everything I've done, nothing has changed; the galaxy is no better off now than it was when I started."
Standing firm, despite her own inner turmoil at the emotions rolling off him, and replied, "You're right, I had a choice. I could have stayed at home, mourning your death for the rest of my life like a pathetic little girl, but I risked everything, willingly gave up everything, to find you. I had a choice, to stay and fight like the warrior I am, the warrior you made me, or to turn and run with my tail between my legs, but I made my choice, and I stand by it! My choice is to be by your side, to fight by your side; you can either accept it or fight it, but either way I'm not going anywhere, and you know it as well as I do. Besides Kaen, no one person can change the fate of the galaxy. You can only fight for what you believe in, to fight to change your part of the galaxy. You may die, but to die fighting is our destiny, it always has been; no Saiyan warrior ever died without a fight, or in their deathbed, we go down kicking and screaming. I made my choice Kaen. I'll live and fight by your side, and die by it if I have to, but as long as I'm here I'll prevent it, because I know with you, we can do anything."
He smiled, a sad smile, and his eyes, which had finally cleared of rage, spoke volumes. They spoke of a man who'd seen more in his short life than many did in their entire life; a man who'd felt more pain than should be bearable; a man who'd seen death reaching his cold, bony hands for him, had felt his icy breath, and regretted living, while at the same time fearing not. His voice was softer than she'd ever heard him in her life as he said, "Do you have any idea what I've become? What I had to become? Do you know how many people I've killed, and how many of those were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time? Eighteen counts of genocide; do you know how many innocent lives are on my soul, how much blood is on my hands? When I die, no-one will remember any of the good I've done; all they'll remember is the lone terrorist you dared challenge the might of the Cold Empire, and lost." He turned his back on her and started to walk off, calling over his shoulder, "You were better off on Vegeta-Sei; at least there, you were safe."
She noticed the definite use of 'When I die,' instead of 'If I die,' as well as the use of 'Vegeta-Sei' instead of 'home'. Her anger rising to boiling point at his refusal to listen, his refusal to let her in, she threw a hard jab to the back of his head, but her fist went straight through it, the image fading to nothingness from the disturbance; it would seem the rest did him a world of good. This didn't help her anger any, and she came close to ascending as she spat, "Baka..." on the verge of tears.
Silence greeted her for a moment, but her ki sense, the ability he taught her, told her she wasn't alone. Sure enough, moment's later Kat's head looked around the corner, and she asked hesitantly, "Are you alright? I overheard what you two were... I..I didn't mean to but..." She trailed off, looking very timid, but at the same time concerned; Pi was a good friend of hers, but at the same time, she was in a fairly emotional state, and, thus, could be very unpredictable.
Pi, for her part, did visibly try to calm down; after all, Kat had done nothing wrong, other than being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Once she'd reined her wayward emotions in she told Kat everything that happened, from start to finish, and what Kaen had said; the Neko, admittedly, had overheard everything, but stayed silent until Pi finished.
Pausing a moment to collect her thoughts, she said, "I..I think I know what he's going through. I've... seen it before." There was a definite pause that didn't go unnoticed.
Nodding slightly, the Saiyan woman replied, "I know you've met him before Kat; he hasn't told me the full story though."
She smiled a little shakily, taking another moment to collect her thoughts; Kaen's words had caused a lot of her own dark memories to resurface, and, while she would rather forget them, it was time to get a couple more off her chest. Taking a breath, she continued, "I..I didn't know that... Well, I suppose I should tell you it then... But... not here. I..I think I... we, should sit, somewhere..."
Pi just nodded and lead the girl off to the cafeteria, taking a table off to the side so that, if anyone else did enter, the two of them would have time to notice; it was obvious that, whatever Kat was about to say was very personal.
The young girl paused, taking a few deep breaths to calm herself. Once she felt her emotions were sufficiently under control, she started. "I met him about four standard years ago.. Some time next month it'll be four years exactly. One day, out of the blue, about six men broke into our house, and... And they started killing everyone." Her voice cracked, but she continued, "They killed my mother, my father, my brothers... My brothers were screaming at me to run as they threw themselves at the intruders. All six of them knew they couldn't win, but they did it anyway, to save me. I.. I did the only thing I could; I ran..."
Tears started to form in her eyes, but she carried on regardless. "I didn't see them die, but I... I could hear them... Even as they died they were screaming at me to run, to save myself... but... but they caught up anyway..." She sniffled a bit before continuing, "When they caught me, all I could think of was that it was over; they were going to kill me, my family's death would be in vain, and there was nothing I could do about it. But... but they weren't going to kill me... not right away at least..."
She stopped abruptly, the memories assaulting her mind's eye becoming too much to handle. Pi nodded as if she understood, placing a comforting hand on Kat's shoulders; she had an idea where this was going. But, as the young catgirl continued, after taking a deep breath and sniffling again, she found that she wasn't entirely correct, and was, for once, happy to be wrong, if only by a small margin.
"They... they were going to rape me... I wasn't even fourteen, and they were going to... And there was nothing I could do to stop them... I prayed and prayed for someone to come, to save me, thinking, believing, that it would never happen... But it did..."
Pi nodded again, saying, "Kaen." It wasn't a question.
Kat nodded, a shaky smile on her face, "He burst through the window, which wouldn't have been quite as shocking if we weren't twenty stories up, and knocked them all away from me, saying that he was going to beat some respect for women into them. Then he beat them down like they were nothing; they fought back, of course, but they might as well have been standing still for all the good it did. After he was done, he got me out of the city, and went back in to help the others... I never saw him again, not until a few weeks ago, but I never forgot him, or what he did for me that day; how could I?"
Wiping her eyes, she said in a firm, resolute voice, "I lost everything that day, and I vowed to myself that I would never allow myself to be that helpless, that powerless, again. That's why I fight now, because I know that there's not always going to be someone to save me; I have to be able to save myself." Looking into her Saiyan friend's eyes, she finished, "I think that's what Kaen's going through now. He knows he won't always be able to get help, so he's making sure he never needs it; but just because he never needs help, doesn't mean he won't ever accept help. Don't worry, he'll come around, just don't give up on him."
Pi just nodded, her voice a little light-hearted in an attempt to cheer both of them up a bit as she replied, "I've dealt with him being stubborn before. Besides, I've chased him far too long to give up on him now."
Kat smiled again, but as she dropped her head it was obvious there was something else she wanted to say, so she let her speak. After a moment, she said, in a low voice, "I'm... I'm not proud of some of the things I've done to get this far... but I... I did what I had to, you understand?" She finished by looking up into Pi's eyes, her face, and her voice, pleading; for whatever reason, she felt she needed the older girl's approval, so Pi nodded, smiling a little to assure Kat, and herself, that things would be okay. Dropping her head again, she added, "I'm... I'm a thief... a-and a stow-away... That's how I ended up on this ship... I needed a way to get away after a job went bad, so I hid in a crate being loaded on..." Curling in on herself a bit, she said, "And... there's something else... but I'm... I'm afraid to tell you..."
Her curiosity peaked, Pi asked, "What?"
The girl sighed, took a shaky breath, and replied, "I've... I've had a major crush on Kaen for four years now... that's why I've tried, am trying, to emulate him, why I stayed on this ship, and why I acted like I did when you guys got here... I always knew he was with someone; he said as much to those guys that were going to... but still, I've felt like this ever since..." She trailed off, and it was obvious that, whatever she hadn't said was why she was afraid.
"Since?" Pi kept her tone flat, but Kat just sighed again, mumbled something too low for even her sensitive hearing to pick up, and curled in upon herself some more. Getting annoyed, she tried to keep from shouting at the girl as she said, "Speak up."
"Since I kissed him..." Her voice was still low, but this time loud enough to hear. She didn't look up, keeping her head between her knees, and her arms around her legs for support; it was clear she felt ashamed, but not regretful, of what she'd done, and was expecting, and preparing for, the explosion she felt was coming.
Under normal circumstances, Pi would have exploded, and been in the right to do so; both girls knew this fact. But she didn't. She couldn't understand herself why she hadn't flown into a rage at this news; clearly Kat was prepared to accept whatever punishment Pi had deemed fit for her crime. Instead, she just nodded a little, musing out loud, "So that's what keeps nagging him..." before standing, grabbing Kat by the arm, and dragging her off. Kat, too surprised by her actions to be in right enough mind to do anything even had she been strong enough to stop her, just staggered after her, trying to match Pi's blistering pace, but keeping her gaze down; she was too afraid to see the look on Pi's face.
o-o-o
Pi more or less dragged Kat along as she headed towards the med bay, arriving just as a newly-healed Kaen climbed out of one of the regen tanks, and stopping as abruptly as she'd started, causing the young girl to almost fall flat on her face. He raised an eyebrow at the two of them and their strange behaviour, but as they never exactly acted normal to begin with just shrugged it off without a word, grabbing a towel to dry himself of the healing liquid he'd just been emersed in, his still-bare torso glistening wetly.
As she watched Kat regain her footing out of the corner of her eye, Pi spoke up sternly, giving Kaen a meaningful look, "You might spout on about having no effect in the galaxy, but sometimes it's not the bigger picture that counts; you can't even seem to see what you've done for those who couldn't help themselves, like Kat here. You think you're losing this 'war' but on every planet I visited I heard nothing but good things; they were singing praise to their saviour, 'The Phoenix', and how hard he fought, and fights, against their 'Cold Empire oppressors'."
He just blinked, mildly shocked, and seemingly at a loss for words, so she pressed on, "No single person can win a war Kaen, not on their own."
He sighed, draping the towel across his shoulders, before saying, "I know... I know... It's just, I'm... I'm afraid I'm not doing enough... I mean, in four years, how much have I done of meaning?"
Pi just nudged Kat, who cleared her throat before replying, "Well, you helped me for one... Not only did you save me, you helped me to become a better person, just by being who you are. Does... does that mean so little to you?"
He looked at the two of them for a moment, before a smile, his first real smile in a while, started to break through the mask of his face as he said, "No, no, that does mean a lot... But still, that's just one person. Not much to say for my little crusade, especially when you consider it happened when I started the damn thing."
Pi interjected, "Not only her, didn't you save her whole world? And just now, together we stopped an invasion that would have destroyed another. Ask Frost how many times Frieza has cursed your very existence; how many people can say that?"
Kaen snorted amusedly at the memory of the Neko-Sei invasion, saying, "I remember that day. To them it was like the sky was falling, and I was some avatar sent to save them from destruction; to me, it was Thursday, and another excuse to hurt people..." Shaking it off, he turned to Kat with a raised eyebrow and asked, "Is that true, that bit about Frieza?"
She nodded again, "From the little he's told me, it was because of you he started this resistance in the first place. It's not every day someone stands up to the Cold Empire, and with you out there causing Frieza a world of trouble, he could form an army and plot Frieza's downfall under his nose. He said Frieza had no idea he was plotting against him until he stole this ship."
Kaen laughed, a short, sharp laugh, as he said, "Yeah, that sounds like Frost." He looked them over a minute before sighing, looking at his mate with a defeated smile as he added, "Alright Pi, you win..."
She just smirked, replying, "Of course I do. Now, put something on before you catch cold, or young Kat here gets a nose bleed."
The girl in question blushed, averting her eyes, but Kaen just raised an eyebrow at them both, saying dryly, "Pi, you of all people should know us Saiyans are above such weakling illnesses as a cold, me especially." With that, he walked off, towel still around his bare, muscular shoulders, stopping in the doorway and turning back to face the girls and adding, with sheer amusement radiating off him, and replacing the anger she'd felt through their bond before, "And I'm not going to let you win everything."
Pi kept her smirk, but inside her heart was doing a little dance in happiness, and it showed through the waves of relief that flowed back to him. With her eyes still down, Kat murmured, "You're never gonna let me live this down, are you?" She felt she already knew the answer, but had to ask anyway.
Instead, Pi just grinned at her, showing how amused she was at the young catgirl, and answering, "Maybe."
Raising her head to look the other girl in the eyes, a hopeful expression on her face, she repeated, "Maybe?"
"Maybe." The Saiyan woman gave no further sureties than that.
Realising that, for now at least, it was the best she was going to get, she gave Pi a friendly hug, whispering, "Thanks for listening. Kaen's the only other one who knows about... you know, and I'd like to keep it that way." Pulling away, she added, "And thanks for understanding, about... everything."
"It's okay, I won't tell anyone." She paused a moment before adding, "Thanks."
Smiling, Kat replied, "Any time." Looking a little nervous again, she continued, "If it makes any difference, he's more like a brother to me now then..." She trailed off, knowing Pi would be able to fill in the blanks. When she just nodded and smiled back, Kat rushed on with the rest of what she wanted to say, "Do you think I could train with you guys sometimes? I mean, I know I'm no where near as strong as either of you alone, and never will be, but we can still swap skills and techniques..."
Pi just looked to Kaen for an answer, and he just shrugged, replying, "Doesn't bother me, just so long as it's not all the time."
"Okay then," Pi nodded.
Kat hugged Pi again, knowing doing the same to Kaen wouldn't help her case any, as she chirped, "Thanks guys." Lowering her voice so only Pi could here, she added, "I asked you 'coz I know if you say yes he does. He always does what you want sooner or later." She finished by giggling quietly.
Pi grinned before hugging her back, replying in a similar volume so Kaen wouldn't hear, only feeling her amusement through their mental link, "It was the best trick I ever taught him." This caused Kat's giggling to escalate in frequency and pitch.
Kaen looked at them again, one eyebrow raised in question, before shaking his head and saying, "I don't know what you guys are talking about, but you know what? I don't want to know. It's probably better I don't"
Pi just grinned again, "Good boy."
Kaen just shook his head again and wandered off, muttering, "Next thing you know she's gonna ask me to roll over, or play dead, or something..." loud enough for the girls to hear. Pi just giggled and, letting go of Kat, chased after Kaen and wrapped her arms around him from behind. Pausing, and turning to look at her over his shoulder as best he could, he drawled, "Can I help you?" His voice was dry, but she could clearly hear the hint of mirth beneath it.
"Yes, I was looking for an ego-filled, muscle-bound brute, and you seem to be about the right size," she replied with a smirk.
His voice still dry, but adopting the tone he'd come to expect from merchants everywhere, he said, "Are you sure you wouldn't want the deluxe model? It comes fully programmed, and completely obedient." There was obviously a great amount of effort involved in keeping the smirk from his face.
"No thanks, I'll upgrade it myself."
"Very well. Would you like to pay now, or will you take advantage of our credit service?" The corners of his mouth started turning up, as the effort of holding back the grin became too great.
"I think I've paid more than enough already, thank you very much." She promptly punched him in the ribs to emphasise her point.
He didn't so much as flinch, replying, "Hey, don't damage the merchandise." The smirk finally broke its way through as he said through their bond, his mental voice full of humour, "You've hit me harder than that while asleep."
"I paid for it, I can do what I like." She laughed out loud. "You don't deserve it as much now."
"Very well ma'am. Please retain your receipt for your warranty." "Only you could think I deserve to be hit because you toss and turn of a night."
"Now, where can I get a leash? Oh wait, here's one built in." She grabbed Kaen by the tail and led him off. "You weigh more than you think, and it takes some effort to get you off me."
"Last I checked, you sleep on my chest, not the other way around." He replied as he gently pried her hand off his tail, both knowing she wasn't trying to hurt him. "That won't be necessary."
"Well, you do have a good grip..."
Their dual conversation was broken as Kat raced to catch up to them after several minutes of observation, crying, "Hey, you guys are having two conversations at once aren't you?"
Pi just looked at her, a curious expression on her face, as she replied, "What makes you think that?"
"You're faces takes on a slightly different look when you do that silent talking thing I've heard you guys can do, both of you."
Releasing Kaen to face Kat fully, Pi said, "Wow, you really are observant. Quite the spy."
She blushed a little, "I do my best. When you're weaker than everyone around you, it pays to notice the little things other's miss."
Pi nodded, "Must be handy at times."
Kat's face just took on a mildly bitter look as she said, "It never comes when you need it though, not until it's too late anyway. But, you know what they say: 'Good judgement comes from bad experience, which often comes from bad judgement.'"
Pi nodded, changing the subject, "How about something to eat?"
Kaen interrupted their little chat, stepping between them and throwing an arm around their shoulders as he said, "Best thing I've heard all afternoon. I could kill for a meal." Pausing for a quick laugh, he added, "I have before."
Laughing a little herself, Pi hurried on ahead to go prepare the meal. And as the remaining two followed in silence, Kaen fell into thought once more. The Kaen from Vegeta-Sei was dead; he was killed in action, replaced with the shadow of his former self that had existed until now. That shadow was now broken, shattered into pieces along with his pride. And while Kaen knew that he would never be able to repair his shattered pride, and the psyche that went with it, to what it had been before the harshness of reality crashed down on him, with the help of his mate, and newly-adopted 'sister', maybe, just maybe, he could build it better, stronger than before.
Ironically, like his ship, he was rebuilding himself from the broken remains of his old self, but he had taken the first step on the path to recovery, the hardest step. He knew his troubles were far from over, but now he realised he didn't have to do everything on his own; he had people who would support him every step of the way down the bumpy road, regardless of his decisions. So he smiled, content in the knowledge that, in the end, all would be right again.
And the Icebreaker flew on, on silent wings, unheeding of its passengers, drawing ever closer to its next destination.
End Chapter 15
To be continued...