Author's Note: Eh okay. Let me say, I LOVE Axel and Roxas, but I had to sadly stick them as the bad guys XX I know. I made this chapter more fluffy, but finally the plot is revealed! (And why Axel's being such a mutha!) Sleep overs and mushy Riku lay ahead! But, watch out for angst! Riku too. (Although when is he not? xx) But I tried listening to Diabolical Rapture on repeat while editing this chapter. (My beta's gone this summer, so if anyone'd like to beta lemme know via review or email!) Note that I changed my penname to VittaMelody because I didn't like my old one, for I wasn't able to put the accent mark in, and because this one matches my other screen name from another site. Slight OCD case XD Also be known that marks represent memories.
I realized I had forgotten to include a Disclaimer. I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Sora, Riku, Axel, Roxas, Wakka, Tidus, Aereith.. but I can and WILL make them do naughty things hehe.
Thankyou again to reviewers! Some of you reviewed twice for Chapters 1 and 2- well, you all rock hard. So for those of you guys, Sekre, StormDarkblade, angel-yuripa, this chapter is dedicated to yooou.
Diabolical Rapture Chapter 3: A Promise I Intend to Keep
I wasn't sure exactly how much time had passed, but I soon realized I had fallen into slumber's arms the moment I woke up- feeling the disgusting presence of sleep in the corners of my eyes mixed with lingering, dried tears. I had long ago discarded the bag filled with that vile substance, thrown it in anger against the wooden frame of the box. That only proved to make me angrier, being unable to hear a satisfying "SMACK!" as is exploded softly against the wood grain of the confessional.
I sat quietly for several minutes, still pondering about the time. How much longer did I have left? An hour? Two? Perhaps three to sit and contemplate my inevitable expulsion?
A sudden commotion from outside broke me from these depressing thoughts. I couldn't tell exactly what was being yelled, but I could decipher the obvious voices of Riku and Axel. Angry, but faint voices, the confinement within the thick walls of the confessional blocking out most of the words.
However, it gave me a little hope, and I wiped dried tears from their ducts, pressing my face closely to the door. I would have starting to bang on the door, demanding to be let out, but my request was fulfilled before I was able to voice it. Light reamed in from the outside, illuminating the obscure and whipping the remaining tears on my face. Before my brain could calculate what was happening, Axel was grabbing both of my arms, and my body was being thrown violently across the stone floor of the church.
"Ow," I choked through sobs. A flash of silver, and I saw Riku rushing to my side, kneeling, and helping me off of the floor.
"Axel, you didn't have to hurl him around like a-"
"Like a what?" Snakelike as ever.
Silence.
Axel broke the silence with a small laugh. "Riku, Riku. I've told you a thousand times. Before you go around saving people, you have to save yourself. If you want to be the good guy, don't rescue him while you're still moping over your own crap."
Roxas spoke up, not facing either one of us. "You know, Riku, we're going to tell everyone now- the school, your parents..."
What the heck?
"I know," Riku answered cooly. "But it just wasn't the same as last time.." Defeated, Riku grabbed my arm and forcefully walked me out of the church- leaving Axel, Roxas, and Wakka in utter hysterics behind us. It was around 5:00 A.M.
In my own words, it appeared, the snake had reared its fangs, bitten each of us, and infected our bodies with it's venomous kiss.
We reached our room without any exchange of words. Riku opened the door, shoving himself in first, I, following closely at his back. Well, more like being dragged. He then released my arm as soon as the two of us were in the room.
Almost in perfect symmetry, each of us flopped onto opposite beds and turned to face each other. I was overwhelmed with relief, curiosity. I wouldn't be expelled after all.. and Riku was to thank for both getting me into the situation in the FIRST place, as well as helping me out of it. What was THAT all about? What did he and Axel share besides hatred? And further more, what kind of trouble was Riku in now?
I didn't want to, but something within me compelled me to ask him why?
"What just-" I stopped. Riku looked like a mess- the strength and beauty from his once handsome face drained and twisted in mismatching features.
"I can't tell you.."
"Yes you can!" I whispered across the room, rising from the bed and sitting up, ears perked for a response.
He sighed, rising from his own bed and striding towards me with exhaustion. I moved my hand that had been propping my body's position up, patting the spot next to me. Sitting down where I had gestured, he replied, "It's complicated."
"We have time... I'll skip breakfast! Just tell me!" I noticed his eyes shifting in... nervousness? Confusion? "Riku!" Anger flaring, I now gasped as violently and as loudly as I could, seeing as he was right next to me, "I was just locked in a tiny little BOX thing for most of the night because of something you did or said! You OWE it to me.. to tell me what for!" My sudden shock of anger surprised the both of us.
"I can't tell you.. everything. But, I'll start explaining if you promise me two things."
"I promise..."
"Promise me first of all- none of this is ever told to another person. If you tell someone else, I'll kill you." Well that was comforting.
"Ooookay. Since you put it that way.. But, you won't have to worry about it anyway- I prooooomise that I won't tell anyone anything you're about to say!"
Riku chuckled a little at my childish response before retorting back. "Okay, second. Please, Sora. Please don't ever scream like that again." Riku's brows furrowed in thought, his request confusing me a little.
"Why?"
"Brings back memories..." I reached out to touch him, letting my fingertips graze the ends of that silver hair. He in turn grabbed my hand, pulling it towards his chest. "I'm so fake, Sora. Only you.. and those three bastards know that. You and I? We're not even that close- as far as friends, or best friends go. Yet... you know... I'm just.."
Never had Riku spoken with such hesitancy. He was broken, battered, and extremely hurt about something. This pain went far beyond his stupid cocaine dealing- this pain came from within, emotionally. Something was wrong with him deeply.
And it frightened me.
"It's okay," I tried coaxing him towards me. Instead, he reversed the action and pulled me fully towards his own heart. I felt tense at this contact- it was something I hadn't ever experienced. And, I didn't really like it either. But, I stayed put for Riku's sake. Jeeze. Would he use this against me now?
Riku didn't say anything in response until I began to shift in discomfort. "Axel.. is a show friend. We keep up appearances. But, it's safe to say we hate one another. A lot."
I only listened to him. It didn't seem like he was speaking to me personally, in fact, rather- voicing his own thoughts out loud. It was strange, for Riku never liked to share his deeper thought provoking interests with me. Sure, we talked about dumb stuff, but never anything remotely like that. Well, besides my parents... but I knew whatever Riku was hiding was far worse than my own situation.
"Can we talk about this some other time?" Riku broke completely from the embrace, sending me sprawling across the bed without his body as a support system. I could only nod sadly, not wanting to press the matter further.
----------------------
Three months had passed us by since Riku and I had that really bad encounter with Axel and co. I could confidently say that now, the two of us were very good friends. Sharing that scary experience before, I guess it brought us closer and made Riku realize he didn't have to appear to be such a hardass around me- and I didn't have to tiptoe on eggshells around him either.
As the year passed, the work demand became increasingly heavier. The two of us preferred to stay in the dorm room to work on homework or study. Sometimes we would even eat dinner together if work allowed itself to take over. Tidus was a bit perturbed by this, so I occasionally went down to dinner with him on nights when I didn't have so much homework. But on special days, Riku would leave French class ten minutes early, sneak down to the kitchen and get dinner for us. It was nice, but I couldn't help but feel guilty for making him miss so much class.
Ah, well. I'm sure he didn't mind after all.
He made me realize our friendship was kind of special. His friends that would drop by a lot didn't really interact on the same levels we did. They usually just made plans for the weekends, talked smack about fellow students, and sports. When his "posse" (or so Tidus called it,) walked around the halls, they appeared to be tight knit- the high society of Saint Helena's who wouldn't let any come between them. Well, that may partially be true, for I didn't believe many of his friends really liked me. At least, that's what I concurred since they never talked or acknowledged me.
Neither did Riku with them around, which in turn perturbed ME.
Tonight, however, nobody bothered us. It was my favorite type of night.
Lately, I had been doing.. well not even lately. Let me start over. For the entire year, I had been doing terribly in French. The whole "sea food plate," and "bon jovi" tricks hadn't really worked towards my advantage- rather pissed Madame Beasley off whenever I accidentally slipped up and said, "Bon Jovi, Madame!"
Riku, seemed to be the opposite. He was really good in French, and noticed my lackluster ability in the area. A few days after the whole Axel incident, he had agreed to help me improve my grades and be somewhat of a.. tutor. It was so funny, to sit there, listening to this big shot spout off random French sentences perfectly, frustrating myself when I found out their silly meanings. If he didn't stop, I was going to give him an embarrassing nickname. Only when I threatened him with this did he really stop.
Well, anyway. We had just finished practicing French- stupid restaurant vocabulary of all things, when Riku moved towards the single lamp in the room, shutting it off in an instant.
"What? Riku! Turn that back on! It's only nine!"
"No... I won't. I want to talk to you." I could feel him smirking, rather than seeing it this time. He was good.
"Well why do the lights have to be off!" Annoyance tinged my voice. Fine, I would just turn the light on myself!
Moving to do this, Riku grabbed both of my wrists, turning me towards his bed and lightly shoving me onto it. "Don't even think about it. Besides. I told you I would kick the boogie man's ass if he bothered us."
"Hmph." Defeated, I eased into the warm blankets. His bed seemed so much softer than mine!
"I feel bad. For not really.. explaining everything about Axel. So I'm going to tell you as much as I can."
"You never said why the lights had to be out." Remember, I was scared of the dark.
"Because I don't want to look at you when I tell you."
Well, gee. "I think you just like being evil!"
"That's exactly right!" Laughing evilly, Riku continued. "I'll start from the beginning." Riku climbed next to me, laying on his stomach as I lay sideways looking at him. For such stupid reasoning, I could see his face pretty well- enough to make out his graceful features within the darkness. I was sure he could see me too. I was happy though, for Riku didn't seem to be emo-tripping this time. In fact, he was almost... happy?
"Okay. Axel and I grew up together. We were friends, I guess, as kids. But once we got to about age.. oh nine or so, things changed. We became rivals. Not in the way of friendly rivals either. Suddenly, we were the only two kids who had grown tall, gotten bigger, became athletic and.. well popular I guess. That could turn nine year olds against each other, I mean, we were stupid little arrogant bastards."
"Heh.."
"Shutup, Sora! Do you want to hear this or not?"
"Sure I do," anticipation lingering in my voice.
"Well. Both of us have been going to Saint Helena's since we were freshmen. To make a long story short, I did some pretty stupid shit. Axel caught me while I was doing it, and has been using it to blackmail me ever since. I give him drugs, that yes, I steal, and he repays me with a little pocket change... and the promise that he'll never tell anyone."
That was the big deal? Riku was being blackmailed? "What was your secret?" I inched closer to his face, trying to peer into those aqua eyes, and search somewhere in their depths for a hidden truth. A clock ticking in a time transfixed, I wanted to know desperately who this boy really was- what made him so sad, yet so entrancing at the same time?
He turned, noticing my creeping figure. "I said I didn't want to look at you."
"Why?" I asked, a little hurt. I didn't like that excuse. What was wrong with looking at me?
"It doesn't matter! You'll find out anyway because I broke things off with Axel. That was the only way I could get you out of there." We sat in a silence for a moment. Riku sighed, continuing on. "So yeah, be thankful, because I've screwed myself royally for your well being."
"Riku... I didn't.. I didn't know," I quietly breathed, wanting to touch his shoulder again like the night of that incident, to reassure him that whatever he was hiding couldn't be so terrible.
He must really care about me then. To risk his reputation for me? But we hadn't been that close back then!
"I don't know why I did it really.. I was just, in the moment. I didn't really think about the consequences until I actually dragged you back here," pausing to flick a few hairs from his face, he added, "not to sound like I regretted it or anything. Because, that's what started this whole thing. Being in the moment- and not regretting it."
-----------------
Just what was he hiding? That question plagued all five senses the next morning
as I raced into religion class- late. His problems were my problems now, whether I liked it or not. Not knowing what the problem WAS- well, that only complicated the matter even further.
"You're late," Sister Agatha bluntly stated through thick words and slit eyes. As if I hadn't known that...
"I'm sorry," I said, squeezing myself into a pew next to Tidus.
"It's okay, just take out your Bible and let's begin. This time- all together, class." I didn't know why, but Sister Agatha really did seem to like me and usually allowed for me to get away with most anything. If this had been French, well, needless to say I would be quite red from embarrassment and deaf from the constant yelling of Madame Beasley.
I peaked over at the page number Tidus was on, noticing that we would be working from the Old Testament today, and flipped towards the number within my own book. Oh man.
Leviticus, chapter 18, verse 22, instructs, "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with women..."
The touchy subject of homosexuality. I remembered back home, hearing a little bit about gays and how it was "bad." There had been a girl on the island who was apparently a lesbian, only to have her parents throw her out and disown her. At the time, it had been a very heated subject between many religious islanders, and the more progressive ones.
I wasn't gay, but I did feel uncomfortable talking about this subject. Especially when I knew I would only be hearing the negative take on homosexuals. Personally, I didn't condemn what homosexuals did.
"Now, I'm sure all of you already know that it's a sin to engage in such activity. God created the Earth- he created Adam and Eve- man and woman are made for one another. I'm not sure what brings on the lust for a member of the same sex, yet that's all it is. Children, homosexuality is lust. In Catholicism, we practice love, love between a man and a woman."
I sat in my seat, not flinching a muscle. Tidus appeared to be a little uncomfortable as well. Hell, we were in an all BOYS school. Boys slept in rooms with one another, and I was sure that there had to be some sort of "romping around in the sheets" behind it all. Nobody appeared to be particularly religious.
Yet as I sat there, I couldn't help but immediately fidget within my seat constantly throughout the rest of Religion. I had completely given up on the hope that my body was an unmoving pole, and with that, it seemed rupture into constant motion.
----------
Bleh, what a day! I was particularly eager to get back to my dorm room, almost too eager, for I kept screwing up and jabbing the key in the lock all too quickly. After a moment's more of toying with the contraption, the lock clicked, and I walked into the room, flopping on the bed, and kicking my shoes off in a rapid midst of relief.
"Secret out yet?"
"Haven't heard a word."
Within time, I had a feeling Riku would be telling me this "secret." Until that time, I had vowed to myself to comfort him, and try to protect this unknown secrecy from reaching anyone in case I had heard anything weird or rumor-like. I wasn't about to loose him as a friend. Plus, I guess I was just a softy. I didn't want to see him upset like that again.
I was broken from all thought as I felt another body pouncing on top of mine, pinning my wrists at both sides of my head.
"What are you doing?" I asked, struggling under his weight. Riku was a lot bigger than me after all.
"Let's sneak out tonight."
"Ohhhhhhh no," I replied, knowing all too well where this suggestion could possibly be heading. "Not after last time- didn't you learn your lesson from that!"
"No! We're not going to sneak out to see Axel!" He laughed. I could only twist uncomfortably, my wrists now turning white from the pressure he exterted through strong hands. "Come on, let's go. It'll be a surprise."
"No."
"No? Then I just won't move.."
"Tell me, Riku!"
"Fine!" He huffed in aggravation, but still not moving off of me. "Not really anywhere in particular, I just want to drive around. Maybe go home tonight. Come onnnn- it's Friday! They let me spend weekends away if I want." A pause.
"So you wanna?"
"A sleep over, Riku? Aren't we a little old?" I cocked an eyebrow and tilted my head slightly at this. Mr. Hot Stuff Riku was still into slipovers? Truth be told, I found it funny AND weird.
"Don't think of it as a sleep over.. just spending time with a friend.. at their house...," he trailed off in a very convincing voice. It would be nice to get out of this place, to leave school grounds in such a long time...
"Fine, fine! If you'll get off of me!" I gasped, still struggling under his weight.
Riku and I left, the time being somewhere around ten o'clock. We didn't receive any odd looks from the school staff upon leaving. As long as I was with this silver haired friend of mine, I believed I could have gotten away with anything possible- minus being looked up in a confessional with a bag of cocaine.
Escorting me to his car, both of us hopped in- he in the driver's seat, I in the passenger's.
"This is a really nice car," I perked up, all the while letting my body slide into the soft cushioning of the seat. Fingers trailed the edges of the vehicle's interior as my eyelids began to droop slightly, lashes covering blue.
"Thanks. It was a birthday present." Riku's foot immediately collided with the gas pedal, causing the care to speed up fast. Actually, we were going very fast now. Like, dangerously fast. "Hey! Don't fall asleep already!" He snapped, noticing my sleepy position, and causing the lashes to return to their peak position.
"I wasn't!" I protest, fully awake once again and crossed my arms over my chest in a defensive manner.
"Yeah right!"
It was about thirty minutes before we finally arrived at Riku's house. The rest of the car ride had persisted with myself staring out of the window, scenes of orange and yellow lights flashing quickly as Riku drove at incredible speed. It was nice to just, think. Peaceful. Riku was this way I noticed, he liked to think a lot. Sometimes I would even catch him standing out on the balcony of our dorm room, perched on black icon supports and gazing at the world beyond him with hungry eyes. It amazed me, how he appeared so serene when I knew something was deeply hurting this person. I would stand there, fingers curled around the door, cerulean eyes and chocolate bangs peaking from behind my hiding spot and watch him. Truthfully, his ability to deflect himself from the rest of the living world mesmerized me. It also disappointed me, for I knew not even I could break him from his trance.
---------
Riku's house was beautiful, but that was no shocker. He was, after all, apparently
very wealthy. It was only natural to have a big, humongous house.
Was it a twinge of jealousy I felt then? Perhaps. But I wasn't generally an envious person, and didn't act upon the feeling any further. I only allowed myself to follow Riku as he dashed inside, throwing his keys on a marble countertop, and sauntering over to another room. I continued to follow him as he walked over towards the phone, to be greeted with a big red FLASH. Apparently he was both popular at school and home.
There was only one message left. Even if I hadn't seen the obvious red "1" on the machine, it stated the fact verbally as soon as Riku had pressed the answering machine button.
"Hello, Riku, you have one new message!"
Well hot damn. Even Riku's phone was fancier than anything I'd ever seen.
We waited a moment before anything else was spoken. It seemed that the message had in fact started, only the person was being a little hesitant to say whatever it was they wanted to say.
"Hey, Riku! If you can't tell, this is Kairi! Umm... I was wondering if you'd like to hang out this weekend. My parents aren't home and my friends and I were thinking of having a party... it wouldn't be a party without you! It just wouldn't! So gimmie a call, although I know you'll make it! See ya soon, love!"
The message ended, a silent room engulfing us once again.
"That your girlfriend?" I asked inquisitively. Did Riku have a girlfriend? Well.. psh. I'm sure he had- he seemingly had everything else. Not to mention, he was really handsome, no doubt any girl would drool over his utter presence.
Wait... since when did I find him handsome? Well. He was, despite the silly protests my brain was sending me. And that was that.
"Nope."
"Then who was she?"
Riku snapped his head back towards my direction, eyes intense with glimmer and intent. "Jealous, are we?"
I managed to stutter out a, "no no no! I was only curious!"
Was Riku hitting on me? Huh...
"Kairi's a girl I met at a party awhile back. I guess we're friends. She has a big crush on me," he stated, while rolling those aqua eyes about their sockets. "...And has been calling every weekend, trying to invite me to MORE parties.. but parties really aren't my thing." I didn't say anything, so he added, "Neither is she. She's not as pretty as you," he issued, poking a finger into my chest, and sliding it up towards my nose.
"Mmm.." Wait! I brushed his hand away, "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Although, I don't blame her for liking me... I'm extremely sexxxxxy!" Riku pounced on me as he said this, completely ignoring my question and wrestling my smaller frame to the floor, pinning me down again. Arms and legs entangled amongst plush, white carpet, I could only hope he wasn't planning on attacking me like this all the time.
Unfortunately, I couldn't ponder on this thought for much longer as I felt Riku's quick fingertips ticking my entire body, searching for one spot that would cause me to erupt in wailing laughter. It didn't take too long either, for I was really ticklish, tears of laughter flowing down my face, and lighting fast legs kicking at his torso signified this. I managed to wiggle a little underneath his tight grasp, causing him to loose his balance and topple over next to me. "You're pretty, Sora. Like a girl. Don't take that the wrong way. You just are. You're small like one too."
"Hmph." I couldn't argue. This was a little true.. Naturally, my shoulders were small, I was only about 5'4", and didn't have the same sort of mature features someone like Riku did.
"Sora, you're too easy."
"You're too mean!"
We both fell into another round of hysterics, letting our bodies shake with absolute mirth. I rolled over, staring at Riku who's laughter still lingered. Something within me subconsciously forced my arm outwards as I grabbed him, pulling him into a sort of.. floor hug? It was a little awkward considering our position, but he didn't seem to mind as I felt his arms wrap around my waist in exchange.
"Still think I'm mean?" He gasped, fits of laughter still hiding within his words.
"Yes!"
We broke apart, laying on the floor and staring towards one another. Riku moved to get up, I mimicking his actions. "Wanna go up to my room and play a video game or something?"
"Sure."
And there we sat, in Riku's beautiful room, next to his own beautiful, personal bathroom, and playing video games on his own- yes, beautiful Playstation. Somehow, the twinge of jealousy didn't even make an appearance, not even for a split second. Thumbs furiously tapping the controller buttons, the two of us sat battling in "versus mode" of a game called Dead or Alive. Riku played as Christie, a silver haired girl, while I chose Hayate, a pretty tough looking guy.
"Why'd you choose a girl?" I curiously asked, thumbs still tapping away. Truthfully, I had no strategy. I just pressed a bunch of buttons, whereas Riku seemed to have memorized every combination of xs and os, landing devastating attacks on my character multiple times.
"I don't usually, but, she looks like me." He shifted a bit, landing another critical hit on poor Hayate. "She's almost as hot as me." That statement earned a set of rolling eyes in his direction.
Several hours later, Riku had beaten me in just about every single match. Well, I had won a few, but I was suspecting he had let me win just because he started to feel sorry for me. Thumbs sore from the redundant task of pressing all those controller buttons, we agreed to stop and do something else.
"Sooo, what would you like to do?"
"I dunno..."
"What do you normally do with your friends?"
"Eh." Now Riku would find out the lovely detail that I, in fact, had none besides him and Tidus- both of whom I just met this year. "I've never done this before..."
"You've never slept over with a friend?"
"I really.. don't have many." I could feel my eyes slightly dropping at that. Admitting to him that I really wasn't the socialite like he was felt horrible, embarrassing, absolutely frightening. Even though the two of us were pretty close at this point in our friendship, there were still moments when I felt so much smaller and afraid of this boy.
I expected his face to drop, for him to mutter something snappy, or even to just stare in disbelief. However, he didn't do any of these things. Instead, Riku pulled my hips a little closer to him, saying gently, "You have me now." An intense gaze lay apparent in his eyes, seriousness there as an annoying "Quit now or continue?" announcer from the video game echoed in the background.
I couldn't move, only stare into those strange, turquoise eyes. "I know." I felt a slight blush creep upon the apples of my cheeks, immediately finding interest in the bed spread and twisting my fingers into it instead.
"Do I have you?"
"Yes." I broke from his grasp. He was starting to intimidate me a lot, though not in the way he did before. He was different- ever changing, ever surprising me with what he might say or do next. Luckily, my stomach seized the moment to inform us both that it was feeling rather hungry, and large growls echoed throughout his room. That earned a blush from me, a snicker from Riku.
"Hungry?"
"Mhmmmm." I cutely nodded my head, hopping that he would pleasepleasplease feed me.
"Okay then. Follow me." Riku slid off the bed, myself stumbling behind, and raced down the set of stairs.
------------------
It was 3 A.M. and both of us were starting to feel the effects of exhaustion on our bodies. We lay sprawled out on the bed, Riku sitting with his hands clasped behind his head in a makeshift pillow position, I laying next to him, and a noisy T.V. left to dwindle on in the background. Bunches of Chinese takeout boxes lay strewn across the floor, remnants of our dinner still lingering in the air. He had asked me what my favorite food was, and, upon replying with "Chinese!" he simply ordered it. I made a mental note to repay him later for that..
We had been talking for awhile- of school, of people, of many things. The conversation had been going pretty smoothly- casual, even, until I had to allow myself to bring up his "secret" once again.
"Riku?"
"Yeah?"
"Can we talk?"
"Aren't we talking now?" He replied, a little annoyed.
"It's just-" I paused to think. I didn't want anything to come across as sounding utterly stupid. "I want to help you, really I do! But I can't if you won't tell me what it I'm supposed to be defending you against!"
"I don't want you to defend me," evident annoyance covered his face this time. "What Axel's going to say, it's the truth. I can't defend what really happened," His arms moving quickly from pillow position to propping up his entire upper torso on the bed.
I reached out, my mouth slightly open and ready to protest. Yet, seeing him a bit angry, I suddenly stopped, not wanting to press the matter any longer. Instead, I reached out a timid hand, placing it on his own and stared at him through sympathetic blue eyes. I was practicing my ultimate "cute" pouty face, which.. had seemed to become rather rusty lately.
However, Riku certainly couldn't resist. Heh.
"Fiiiiine. I'll tell you," he stated, shape shifting once again and leaving the bed. This caused a sudden shift of mass, causing me to slightly bounce after his departure. He walked to his window, hands entangled in silver hair. Riku's expression and appearance had switched from calm to incredibly frustrated in a matter of seconds.
At least I could sleep safely knowing I still had the cute, pouty look within my powers!
I stared at him questioningly, somewhat scared and embarrassed that I had brought this up. When he opened his mouth to speak, I suddenly found myself hushing him quietly with a finger to his mouth. "It's okay, I.. I shouldn't have asked. You can tell me when you're ready."
Riku sighed, probably in relief. "Thankyou. That... that means a lot to me, Sora."
I smiled, being sure to extended and showcase all thirty two of my healthy, shiny teeth! I didn't, and wouldn't walk on eggshells with Riku- I couldn't afford to loose my best friend.
Best friend?
Yes, he was my best friend. Even if I weren't his, he was mine and I didn't intend on loosing such a friendship.
"Sora, you dork," Riku said in his usual, friendly yet dominant tone, while rustling my spiky locks. "Let's go to sleep."
I nodded, skipping towards his bed and laying completely on the right hand side. When I didn't feel the added weight of Riku's body next to mine, I sat up, question marks filling my eyes as I saw him pulling blankets from underneath his bed and creating a little, miniature shelter for himself.
"Riku?"
"Mhm?"
"Why aren't you sleeping on the bed?"
His annoyed gaze met my curious one, a frown tempting the corners of his mouth to pull downward with irritation. "Because, you're sleeping on the bed."
"What's wrong with me? I thought I was your friend!" Fingers clasped onto bed sheets firmly now, allowing myself to lean further downwards and hover above his head.
"Nothing's wrong with you!" He paused briefly to wisp a few silver bangs from his eyes, "I'm being polite!"
"You're going to be in a lot of pain in the morning! Just sleep with me!"
"Sleep with you?" I clasped my hand to my mouth, with sudden realization as to what I had just said! I had only meant for him to sleep in the bed WITH me, not literally with me! Good going.
But yes, that night had been riddled entirely with awkward moments. Every so often I would feel his hand brush against my own skin, see those aqua eyes filled with a strange look of adoration, hear his whispering voice against my ear. Father, I couldn't help it. He was so nice! A real friend, the first one ever! I felt normal for the first time in my life...
I could only flush furiously at myself, and Riku, gather my arms in crisscrossed movement across my chest, and pout towards him. "You know what I mean! I just don't want you to sleep on the floor! I'd feel guilty!"
Riku's face won the battle against irritation, settling for mere indifference, and flopped next to me on the bed.
"Okay, I'll sleep with you," he replied with an evil grin. "As long as you stop using that pouty face against me."
"Riku!"
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I slept fine. Until 4 A.M. that is.
There I lay, innocently stretched amongst a cozy bed. True, I had managed to steal almost ninety percent of the covers throughout the duration of the night, but Riku hadn't knocked me awake in order to steal them back! There, justification!
Until 4 A.M. that is.
Riku was tapping my shoulder, lightly at first, then a bit harder, and harder.. until I finally admitted to myself it was "not" a part of my dream sequence. I was already facing him through narrowly slit eyes. Widening the slits, I allowed for my blurry vision to focus until I could tell Riku was staring at me once again. A half crooked smile, slightly furrowed brows, and I knew he was worrying again.
"Couldn't sleep?"
"No." We both sat up in unison, still facing one another directly.
"I've got to tell you Sora. It's..," taking my hand in his, "it's absolutely killing me."
I nodded, squeezing his hand in reassurance to continue. "You can tell me anything... I promise... it'll be okay." I felt a beam of happiness as I earned his smile once again.
"Promise you won't leave, scream, or get mad?"
"Of course!"
He sighed heavily before continuing. Here we sat, I incredibly oblivious to this boy's inner depths, and he about to spill forth those inner depths. The inevitable, bound to occur, yet I felt a little scared. "Two years ago, when I was a sophomore, I met a boy like you..."
"Riku! I missed you so much! Where were you?"
"I was only gone for ten minutes!"
"It seemed like forever..."
"Sorry, Norito." The taller one stated, grabbing the other by the hand and walking him towards his bed.
"Axel was my roommate at the time, but he wasn't with me one night. He had gone away to a friend's dorm to stay the night, saying something about memorizing answers for an upcoming test." I continued to listen intently, giving random hand squeezes. Every so often, I would catch his eyes glaze with sorrow. I knew that look. I felt it myself many times.
"Norito, I love you... do you love me too?"
"I do...," A small, raven haired boy gasped, holding on tightly to the other- his boyfriend, and kissing him gently on the cheek.
"Are you sure?"
"I, I think so." Fingers tightened, twisted into the other's shirt, eyes gazing lovingly into his. When aqua met violet, clouds collided, erupting thunder and spreading chaos about. But it was beautiful.
"The boy who reminds me of you, well, he came over that night that Axel left."
The adolescent named Riku covered the other with kisses, leaving one in each place an article of clothing was removed. He allowed his fingers to grace over the other's ghost like skin, tickling and taunting him with butterfly touches. It wasn't much longer before the entire uniform had been stripped of both boys, and lay discarded on the floor beneath them.
Pushing the smaller boy named Norito gently on his back, Riku continued their affair. Starting softly at the other's nape, he worked his kisses downwards, trailing each one in artistic motion until reaching his slender hips.
A few tears splashed beautifully in Riku's eyes. It reminded me of hurricanes, a swirling bit of white within a sea of blue and green. Upon instinct, I reached out to brush each of them away with the tips of my fingers. In response, he grabbed hold of my other hand, pulling us closer to one another in one swift move.
"His name was Norito- a freshman, so he's your age now. I met him one night at a school party. Axel was being mean to him, so I stopped him- much like I did with you. Well, even though a lot of people thought it was weird, we became really good friends."
"Tell me to stop and I will."
"I want this!"
Riku clasped onto my hands harder at this point. It wasn't a loving gesture, which confused me a little, yet I continued to sit there. "Please don't leave once I tell you this, Sora."
"I won't!"
I was utterly terrified. And yet, I knew what he was going to say next.. I knew what had happened. I wanted to run- away from Riku, away from the truth. But I was stuck, both literally and figuratively.
"He loved me."
The blood drained from my face, causing it to equal the pale glow of Riku's own face in the moonlight. Riku was... he was gay? The fact kicked me, frightened me, and somehow didn't even shock me all the same.
"You're... you're?"
"Yes." I felt my fingers now slick with sweat, heart pounding rapidly.
Before anything further could occur, a red headed teenager burst through the door. The only warning had been a few muffled laughs only seconds before his appearance. A few seconds had not been time enough.
Green eyes widening to their maximum limit, he dropped his key with a loud "clang!" to the wooden area of the floor. "WHAT... IS... GOING ON?" He screeched, doubling over with shock and amusement at the same time. Catching two boys, in an all boys Catholic school about to have sex.. well that was the highlight of Axel 's life.
The two situated on the bed gathered themselves quickly, forcing the sprawled out remnants of clothing on their bodies in sheer embarrassment. "Axel this-" the silver headed one started in panic, watching fretfully as his small boyfriend rushed out of the room with cheeks tinged pink and tears welled in the corners of his eyes.
As much as my mind yelled, "Run!" my heart ushered, "Stay!"
Riku was gay. And trying to hide it within a very close-knit Catholic school wasn't easy. Putting myself in his situation, I felt sorrow for him, tugging and pulling on my heartstrings. I couldn't allow myself to abandon him. His story.. was not yet over. And, I had promised him. A promise I intended to keep.
"Axel wasn't off cheating. He knew. He, he," Riku allowed several more tears to trickle down his porcelain skin and stain the corners of his mouth. "He planned on coming in on us that night!" When I saw his eyes squeeze shut, only pushing more tears forward in momentum, I could only break from his tight grasp to take his shaking frame into my arms. Feeling small bumps among his flesh, I trailed my fingers across them in reassuring patterns. I would do anything to calm him.
I waited a little longer for him to continue, switching from rubbing his arms to brushing strands of moonlit hair out of his face every now and then.
"Riku, I don't care if you're... gay. I'll still be your friend."
"It's NOT that!" Riku suddenly exploded, tears no longer effervescing themselves from their ducts, only lay stained and stamped on various places of his cheeks. "It's not that...," he once again echoed, petal soft this time, as if apologizing for his earlier outburst.
"Tell me," I cooed.
"He loved me." I nodded in understanding. I knew that much. "But I didn't love him back."
"Huh?" I felt suddenly puzzled, not quite understanding where this would be heading from here.
"I was in lust with him. And I did the worst thing possible! I tried.. I tried sleeping with him, Axel caught us... and he's been using it against me ever since!" Riku was no longer crying, and hadn't been for a total of ten minutes. Perhaps he was completely dried out- not used to such emotive expressions like this. His demeanor no longer wreaked of sorrow, thankfully. But with ying comes yang, love comes hate, and what of pleasure without pain? He now seemed angry, frustrated, and it only frightened me because I was the only living thing close enough for him to beat to a bloody pulp in frustration under such circumstances.
Deciding to shower him with kindness rather than hesitancy, I took his hand again, brushing my fingertips over his neatly kept nails.
"Axel's.. going to tell my parents."
"Why would they believe him? He has no evidence." Riku's hands were so beautiful...
"Norito left school the week after. He's shelled himself in, won't talk to anyone. That was two years ago! I've.. I've tried calling him, visiting him. He's moved out now.. I'm not sure where he lives. Everyone knew we were close. It wouldn't be too hard to believe."
"I want to help you, Riku!" I felt scared for this boy. Odd. How our roles switched suddenly after I knew the truth. I became the panicked one, wearing my emotions and fright on my sleeve, Riku now coaxing me into reassurance.
"It'll be okay... I have you, right?"
I nodded, knowing history had a horrible habit of repeating itself. And irony, was once again being a big meanie head. I didn't want to admit it, experience this, but I knew those events were going to curl themselves around in a circle and hit the both of us on repeat.
I shuttered against Riku's strong arms. He sat, upright with legs spread apart, me in between. The tips of my spikes were now being forced to obey the law of gravitation as I held my head underneath Riku's chin and brought my arms upwards to cling onto the ribbed collar of his tee-shirt.
A single tear slipped from my own eyes, snaking it's way towards my chin, and falling downwards. Feeling the wet splash against his skin, Riku tilted my head upwards, taking my left hand in his free one, kissing it ever so softly.
And I knew, he was gay. And I was not.
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Author's Note: Riku's a nauuuughtyyyyy angst! driven man! And I mentally kicked myself for making Roxas evil. If I had planned better, I would have made HIM be Riku's old time lover. Then Axel would have had a better motive xX So dumb. But I suck at outlining. In fact, my outline had been thrown off by a chapter because I went ahead and made Riku tell Sora in this one. He wasn't supposed to until.. checks next chapter.. and Riku wasn't even supposed to make a move until chapter 5!
Riku: Hehe, I pwn your soul. I could not resist Sora!
Yes, yes you do, Riku.
Review review! If I get lots of reviews, I'll shower you with goodness in the next chapter. No reviews, and well, you're all screwed. For I will be very very evil next chapter and switch what's supposed to happen again. Hehe.
No. But seriously.