And there are new spinoffs in town, which I'm sure a lot of you has heard of already. The first two are by Roman de la Croix, called "Macavity's Revenge" and "Yet Some More Revenge." Then there is "Diaries of Diablo" by Lobo Diablo Lone Wolf. If you can't get enough of this silly story, that's where to go!
Twenty-Two: Much Ado About Homework
"Well, I am impressed," said a rather merry voice from somewhere around her head. "This is the third time you end up in the infirmary, miss Swanson."
Joanna opened her eyes. "Jenny?"
"Yes, dear. Nice to see you with us again." Jennyanydots tsked. "Sleeping outside. A very stupid thing to do."
"I didn't mean to," wheezed Joanna and coughed. "It's just happened."
"Shh, don't try and talk with that voice you have," said the Gumbie Cat and shook her head. "Just lie still like a good girl, and I'll get you some warm beer. You have a pretty nasty cold, dear, but your fever has at least ebbed. We'll hope it doesn't rise again."
Joanna groaned. "Sleepy..."
"Yes, try and sleep a little. It'll do you a world of good, I'm sure. I'll tell miss Misty to drop by with your homework later."
A loud wailing echoed through the junkyard suddenly, ending in a complaining sob, and Joanna frowned momentarily. "What was that?"
Jennyanydots regarded her critically. "You are a Mistoffelees fangirl, aren't you?"
Joanna nodded.
"Then, and believe me when I say this, you really don't want to know."
"New arrivals!" exclaimed Pouncival cheerfully as he walked into the faculty area, a line of minis traipsing behind him. "Gather 'round, everybody!"
The OFUC staff looked at him curiously, holding their conversations as the Rumpus Cat ushered the minis inside to shield them from the snow. Having new mini-Pollicles arriving to the junkyard was always somewhat interesting, just because it gave them the chance to boggle at the foolishness of the people creating them.
"What do you have for us now, Pounce?" asked Tumblebrutus and peeked at the minis, his head tilted to one side. He sat by the fire with his own 'Bruts and 'Brutis, sometimes casually throwing them a stick to fetch.
"Well, I am glad you asked!" said Pouncival. "First we have a rare one: Bily McCaw. Here, Bily!"
A mini who was strangely green in colour and had wings protruding from his back, squawked something that had no business being in a PG-13 rated fic at all, and walked up to the spotted tom.
"I like him," said Kihr and waved at Bily McCaw. "His wings are very classy. Green is the new pink, you know."
"It is?" inquired Gecka. "I hadn't heard that."
"Anyway!" said Pouncival loudly. "We also have another one for our favourite Mystical Male. Here's Coricophat!"
Coricophat was for some reason wearing a denim cap turned back to front. His fur, which like all the Coricopat minis was very dark, had some white strands of hair. If you squinted, they formed the words "Reprezent da hood" over his chest.
"Naw, lookit the widdle hip-hop mini!" cooed Ekwy and scratched Coricophat behind the ears. "Isn't he adorable?"
"Charming," said Coricopat, who was looking at his mini with something close to contempt.
Coricophat couldn't care less, even though he clearly enjoyed being scratched behind the years.
Another mini had showed up now. It was mostly a brown/black/white mix, but it had patches of gold here and there, and it was looking very confused indeed.
"This is Damets," said Pouncival.
"Let me guess," sighed Demeter. "One of mine?"
Demter perked up, eager to get a sibling, and walked up to sniff curiously on Damets.
"Actually, it's Admetus's."
"Admetus's? But..."
"Yes, we know." Pouncival shrugged. "He was referred to as a he in the story he spawned from, so that's our only guess. We're... actually not sure what he is."
Damets looked at Demeter with huge eyes that flooded with tears and whimpered pitifully.
"Poor thing," she murmured. "Come here, sweetie, I'll take care of you..."
"Can we have shared custody?" asked Admetus hopefully. "I think Admetas wants someone to play with."
The golden queen smiled warmly and nodded.
"Well good, now that's out of the way," said Pouncival. "We had one more. Plato, you have your first mini! Meet Plaitao!"
The mysterious looking cat raised his head in surprise. "Really? I have? But my name is only five letters, how can anyone..."
"If they can misspell a common name like mine," muttered Victoria with a look on her own snow-white (and surprisingly masculine) Victora, who was playing with Etcetera's and Jemima's minis a few meters away, "they can most certainly misspell yours."
"And that was all?" Miss Minnaloushe asked Pouncival, raising her eyebrows. "No... weird things today? Like random models of American cities, stuff like that?"
"Only one thing, miss. The Russile Hotel. We figured we'd put it in the mini-Pollicle pen for them to sleep in."
"Typical that it would show up now, when we're already finished with the hut," muttered Asparagus. "That's the Narrative Laws of Comedy, right there."
Pouncival looked up to the sky, where stars had already begun twinkling. At this time of year it was never light out for long.
"All right everyone!" he exclaimed. "All minis go back to their pen, except for Tantimolle, Skimbell and Munustrap, since you are on guard duty tonight. Come on now, chop, chop!"
He gathered the minis to bring them back to the pen, and the faculty waved their goodbyes to their minis and returned to their chatter.
"I would like to bring up the matter of Christmas celebrations with you all," said miss Minnaloushe and leaned back in her comfy armchair. "The holidays are closing in, and with mid-term papers coming up, I figure we should have some sort of reward at the end of the line. What do you think?"
"Oh, let's have a party!" squealed Electra delightedly and clapped her paws together. "I love parties!"
"Ah yes, because that worked out so wonderfully the last time," said Admetus and rolled his eyes. "I still bear scars from that night."
Electra poked her tongue out at him. "Nothing that says it will happen again." She turned towards the course coordinator. "Please, miss Minnaloushe, can't we have a party?"
Miss Minnaloushe smiled thinly. "I shall definitely consider it, Electra. We just have to make sure that what happened at the Halloween Ball does not happen again. Twins?"
Coricopat and Tantomile flinched. "Yes?" they both said at the same time.
"You do not happen to have any more gigantic monsters made out of a frozen dessert, do you?"
"No, miss Minnaloushe."
"Good." The course coordinator smiled again. "Then I think a party is in order. But not a costume party this time. Something else. It's time that someone brought a little table manners to this place..."
Joanna spent the next three days in the infirmary, and then Jennyanydots kicked her out in favour of Electric Fire and Brize, who had both figured that the best way to get to Pouncival was to hang around the mini-Pollicle pen a lot. This, as it turned out, was not such a very good idea. Minis were very territorial, and they didn't trust fic-writers any longer than they could throw them.
In any case, Joanna was still coughing a lot though, and felt faint when she was exhausting herself more than she should. Misty, who apparently had been Florence Nightingale in a past life, spent her time doting on her roommate, constantly asking her if she felt ill or wanted to rest. Joanna said that she felt fine.
She was not fine. In the three days she had been away from class, she had received four essays, one paper and one article for the Lantern about how to properly characterize the Jellicle kittens to write. She was also in the middle of yet another attempt to write an original character that wasn't a Mary-Sue. It was... difficult, to say the least. Not to mention, mid-terms were coming up, and she had to study like a crazy person to catch up.
"You really should try and relax a little," remarked Misty, who sat with Alida in her lap, trying to feed the pixay with more Shrimp Delights. "Sit down, have a nice cup of tea... With scotch in it, it's REAL nice."
She grinned. Joanna sighed.
"I don't have time for tea," she muttered. "I have tons of homework, and that article is not going to write itself, and Polly needs someone to play with her or she'll never turn into a Pollcile and I'll never graduate and if I don't graduate then I'll never be able to write CATS fanfiction again, and what..."
"That's it!" Misty carefully put Alida back into the aquarium and then she curled up in Joanna's lap. "Pet me."
Joanna stared at her. "What?"
"It is scientifically proven that petting a cat lowers your blood-pressure, and there's a vein in your forehead that's throbbing creepily at the moment, so pet me or I'll scratch you!" The grey Jellicle purred and nuzzled her roommate.
Joanna sighed. "If I pet you, will you allow me to go to the library afterwards? I have to come up with a name for my OC that's not Kateryn Moonbeam Starsong, and there's a book that I have to look into."
Misty made a gesture at the books that were littering the seats of the TSE 4. "You mean you don't have enough of them already?" Joanna gave her a look, and the cat sighed deeply and shrugged. "Fine, you can go to the library. But don't wear yourself out, Jo. That's never a good idea."
Joanna only muttered something and began scratching her roomie behind the pointy ears. For a while, nothing was heard in the TSE 4 but the purrs from the Jellicle student, and the faint sound of falling snow outside. After about three minutes, Joanna's legs had turned numb, and Misty had fallen asleep with her head in her roommate's lap. The human girl groaned, but carefully lifted the Jellicle's head, placed it on a pillow next to her, and hurried to sneak out of the car door.
The night air was crisp and cool, and her breath came out of her mouth in white clouds of condensation. For a moment she simply stood there, savouring the exquisite chill that felt so refreshing against her skin. In a distance she could hear the cheery shrieks from a few students that were in the middle of a snowball fight, but besides that it was completely quiet.
Joanna sighed contentedly and started to walk towards the library. Perhaps Misty'd had a point. She did feel a bit more relaxed now, even thought her anxiety probably wouldn't go away until Christmas break.
She passed the entrance to the faculty area, and flinched momentarily as she saw three minis standing guard outside.
"Don't worry, I'm just on my way to the library," she said automatically, even though she wasn't sure that minis understood human speech. "I won't try and get in."
The minis eyed her suspiciously, but they lay back down again. They did keep an eye on her until she had passed, though, so it was clear that they didn't trust her at all. Joanna quickened her pace a bit. Having a bunch of minis directly behind her instinctively made her very nervous.
She reached the library and gave Grizabella a nod. The Glamour Cat had reluctantly taken the post as librarian since she would much rather spend time with the rest of the Jellicles, but when miss Minnaloushe had kindly reminded her that everyone had to do their part, she had grumpily accepted. She did seem to like it a little nowadays though. At least she gave Joanna a faint smile as the student entered.
The library at OFUC was big. Not only did it carry copies of textbooks needed to succeed in classes; it also had a vast section of books about cats. Their history, breeds, how to properly raise kittens, what they ate, how to get your cat spayed... It was all there. And not only that. There were stories about cats, legends about them, myths about them. Everything that had ever been written about the noble specie called Felis catus had been collected here, and the library, that spread over three floors filled with bookshelves, was the largest area on campus.
Joanna stood pondering for a moment before she set course on the small area reserved for what the faculty considered Good Fic. It was mostly CATS of course, but a few stories were from some of the larger fandoms, like Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. Joanna knew that this section had the most comfortable chairs to sit in while reading, so she took down a book (Felines through History: From Ancient Egypt to the Cheshire Cat) from a shelf she passed, and was just about to sit down when she stopped and stared in surprise.
In the largest chair of the entire library, the one with large red patches on its arms and back, sat miss Minnaloushe, clearly into a book of her own. The moment Joanna came close the course coordinator froze momentarily.
"Good evening, miss Swanson," she said without looking up. "What brings you here at this hour?"
"I... was just going to read for a bit," mumbled Joanna and waved with her book vaguely. "I need a good cat-name for an OC, and I figured I'd look through the history for inspiration..."
Miss Minnaloushe raised her head and looked at the fic-writer with large, grey eyes. "A good idea, miss Swanson. By all means, don't let me bother you. I am only here to... relax for a bit." She stretched out her wings and hid a yawn.
"Why relax here?" asked Joanna before she could stop herself. "I mean... isn't that what the faculty area is for?"
Miss Minnaloushe chuckled slightly. "A wise man once said that cats has never forgotten that they were once worshipped as gods. Ironwings has always been a confident kind, but when you compare us to the Jellicles, we are most definitely beaten. I come here for some peace and quiet occasionally." She stood up and brushed off her dress. "However, it is time for me to retire now. You are welcome to take my seat, should you wish it."
She neatly arranged the books she had been reading into a pile on the low table in front of her, gave Joanna a nod, and swept out of the library.
Joanna sat down hesitantly. It felt weird to sit in the chair that she knew had hosted the course coordinator just moments before. It felt as if miss Minnaloushe was going to change her mind, come back and smite her just because she had dared such a sacrilege.
Soon she settled in however, and cuddled up with her book in front of her. Then her eyes fell on the stack of books miss Minnaloushe had left behind, and her mouth fell open.
"Why was miss Minnaloushe reading books on table manners?" she wondered out loud.
A/N: Todays cookie challenge: Who is the "wise man" who said that cat never forgot being worshipped as gods? I'll give you a clue. It's a very popular, British author.
Answers to Reviews:
Korora: Yes, Joanna's misspellings of canon names at the beginning does make new minis.
Zazzie: Yep, I got your entry for the contest, and it is lovely. :)
Roman de la Croix: Jellylorum has had a lesson of her own. Bustopher, Tugger and Munkustrap has most certainly been mentioned a fair few times. And it seems to me like I write in Old D all the time! .:sigh:. It takes time to write a story like this. I don't have plans for every single Jellicle, even though I do the absolute best I can to get them all into this. Things can't happen all at once. You have to be patient.
TamerianRaven: Which one, the Cat That Walked By Himself or Maneki-neko? The first one can be found over the internet, just google it. The second one I'm not so sure of. I read a very shortened version in a book, but that book does not exist in English... Look around!
JemimaWeasley: You don't have to appologize, you didn't know. People just... keep asking me that question, as if I keep track of every single one of the fifty-odd students that go to OFUC...
tuggergirl: Thank you for your review! I don't know if there will be more of the Jellice, we'll just have to wait and see. To enroll: Go to chapter six of this story. At the bottom of the chapter, you will find the enrollment form. Copy it and paste it into an email and send it to me at josefin at ingenting dot se. Done!
Twilight Poet: Maybe. Wait and see.