ENROLLING IS NOW PERMANTENTLY CLOSED. The TSEs are all full. Thank you everyone who enrolled!
Note: My heart goes out to those affected by the bombings of the London Underground. Londoners that might be reading: I am in awe of your abilities to laugh it off, and I love you all.
Disclaimer: The Cheshire Cat doesn't belong to me, but to Lewis Carrol. And CATS still isn't mine. The only people that are are Joanna, Misty, miss Minnaloushe, Gecka, Ekwy and Kihr. The rest are fictional or reviewers. Yep.
Twenty-Five: The Other Pink
Miss Minnaloushe regarded the Christmas tree sceptically, scratching her chin.
"That is strange," she said after a while. "I was certain we had more ornaments, Munkustrap."
The grey tabby coughed and looked on the ground. "Well, we are cats you know... It's difficult to resist..."
The course coordinator sighed. "I see." She looked at the tree again. "I see you managed to get things to the branches high up as well."
"It wasn't difficult." Munkustrap looked admiringly at his claws. "We're pretty decent climbers. And Etcetera managed to get up to the top and put the moon into place."
Miss Minnaloushe squinted at the top of the tree, where a large silver plate gleamed as a full moon. "Oh yes. A star would be somewhat inappropriate, indeed. A moon is much more fitting for the Jellicle tree." She frowned momentarily. "Is that... Rumpleteazer's necklace?"
She pointed at a shimmering bead of pearls that hung from a branch not far from the moon.
"Yes. We felt a little bad about breaking most of the Christmas decorations, so we added some things ourselves. I think you can see Tugger's belt there somewhere as well."
"Indeed you can. But I wouldn't point that out to the students; they would try and steal it to keep it as a souvenir."
"Don't worry, miss. We thought about that. It's too high for any human students to reach it, and the branch it hangs on is too thin to hold for a Jellicle student trying to get it. It shouldn't be a problem. Unless the students somehow learn to fly..."
The course coordinator was silent for a moment. "Well, I wouldn't put anything pass them, you know. Perhaps we should let minis patrol the area, just to make sure. I suspect you'll want your possessions back after the holidays..."
The first thing Joanna and Misty noticed as they walked into the Jellicle junkyard was the Christmas tree. It was somewhat difficult to miss, being at least ten feet tall and adorned with brilliant baubles and ornaments that made Misty's eyes sparkle.
"Want... to break them," she mumbled and took a few steps towards the tree. "Pretty breakables..."
A couple of mini-Pollicles sat up from their places at the bottom of the tree and growled at her, causing her to jump.
"Okay then, perhaps not..."
Misty backed a few steps, and the mini-Pollicles lay down again. They did not close their eyes however, but kept them open in case other students would get the very silly idea to try and break the Christmas ornaments.
The two fic-writers hurried away from the tree and looked at the rest of the Jellicle junkyard. It was mostly table, really. It had been cleaned as much as was possible, and various large objects like old washing machines and ovens had been placed in uneven squares on the ground. Sheets had been thrown over them to make them look like tables, and garlands of holly had been placed neatly around the plates and glasses (and the occasional bowl). Someone had placed candles all around, which were illuminating the junkyard in a warm, golden light. The air smelled of gingerbread and pudding.
"Wow," said Joanna.
"Yeah," agreed Misty. "It's not bad."
The found places to sit down by a couple of wooden boxes, where they had a rather nice view of the Tire. Miss Minnaloushe stood on it, clearly waiting for everybody to arrive. Once all seats were filled and the faculty had taken their place by their own separate table, she cleared her throat.
"Before we begin our feast," she said and adjusted the tasteful bow (which was red for the occasion) that kept her hair in its neat bun, "there are a few announcements that has to be made. First of all, we have all heard about your little 'who-dies-most-times' contest. I think you missed our point there somewhere along the way, but anything that takes your one-track minds off glomping is quite fine with me." She gave Jennyanydots a look, and the Gumbie Cat nodded approvingly. "Jenny has gone through her forms, and we do indeed have a winner."
She coughed slightly as she received a piece of paper from Ekwy.
"It's Mystitat," she said plainly. "Hurrah, and so forth."
The students applauded politely as Mystitat gave a happy squeal and stood up. She ran up onto the Tire, and miss Minnaloushe stepped back with a small sigh.
"Thank you!" exclaimed Mystitat joyfully. "Oh, I wish to thank everyone who killed me, I couldn't have done it without you! Wait, I have a list..." She fumbled with a notepad and cleared her throat. "First of all, there is of course Misto's sweet little minis: Mistfellis, Mistofalees, Mistoffalees, Mistofelees, Mistofellees, Mistofelles, Mistoffles, Mistofflees, Mistoflees, Mistoffolees, Mistoffoles, Mistofolees, Mistofolese, Mistofyleis and last but not least Mistophelees! You never stopped believing in me!" (Here she wiped a tear from her eye with the tip of her tail.) "And then there is of course my friends in the Misto Squad, many of you who never ceased to stand by me when I was despairing, and were always ready to get me killed..."
"There is something VERY wrong with this thank-you speech," Joanna heard MagicalMisto mutter to mrmistoffelees.
The Jellicle student nodded. (The two had immediately bonded since they both had named themselves after their favourite Jellicle. They had even started a club with Jemima-luvah, JemimaWeasley and Tuggergirl. Their motto was: "If you love 'em, name yourself after 'em!")
Mystitat kept on thanking people, but after five minutes of her reeling off every mini-Pollicle that had ever killed her, miss Minnaloushe shooed her off the Tire.
"Yes, thank you, miss Mystitat," she said. "That would be quite enough." She coughed slightly as the fangirl squeaked and hurried off to her seat. Miss Minnaloushe turned to her students. "Good evening, you all. I am glad to see you here tonight."
A couple of students snorted, "yeah right," but no one had the guts to object to the course coordinator's statement.
"I am glad to see you because that means we're able to educate as many as possible," continued miss Minnaloushe. "In my opinion there has been a terrible lack of table manners and Good Form at this school. That will change, starting this minute. This dinner will serve as a lesson to you in how to behave. I am a great believer in politeness." She smiled. "Those who fail will become dinner for the minis. And let me tell you, there is no prize you can win that will make a death like that worthwhile."
The dinner party was a disaster. Joanna could feel it. The whole thing was ridiculous. A lesson in table manners? What good was that going to do? Would it help them to get their fic-writing licence? Would there be extra credit involved? And why were there so much cutlery?
"Just start at the knife and fork furthest away from your plate and work yourself in," whispered Misty, who had been at dinner parties like this in her days. "And try to look like you know what you're doing!"
Joanna tried. She really did. But it's hard to remember which fork is the salad fork when there are hungry minis staring at you, hoping that you would fail. In the end she placed her knife and fork in the neat "a quarter past three" position on her plate, to show Macavity's henchcats that she had finished eating. They came up to her to take her plate away. She mournfully watched it disappear as her stomach grumbled hungrily. It was too bad, really. The food had been delicious, just like she'd known it would be.
"Is it rude to leave the table?" she asked Misty.
"Yes," replied the Jellicle student without even bothering to look up for such a stupid question. "And miss Minnaloushe will use you for target-practice if you stand. There will be tea later, though, I think. Even you couldn't possibly mess up with tea."
"Oh, don't be too sure," muttered Joanna sulkily and sat back down. "This isn't really my thing."
"I figured as much."
Misty didn't say much else; she was too busy eating. She was however right. After dessert had been served (sweet rice pudding with cream) the tables were cleared and pushed away, to make room for a dance-floor. Large kettles of tea were placed out here and there along the sides, and the students were invited to mingle. By now everyone (with the exception of Joanna) were full and quite happy with sitting down for a while before the music would start playing. Even glomping was out of the question.
And that was when it happened.
For a moment there was a strange humming in the air, and Joanna looked around to see from where it came. She saw nothing at first, but when she squinted she spotted a few glittering sparks hovering above the Tire. Misty was standing leaning against the rubber circle, chatting with Aier and Russ. Neither had noticed the sparks.
'I must be hallucinating,' thought Joanna and shook it off. 'The hunger's getting to me...'
The humming grew stronger, and it seemed like it was coming from the mysterious sparks. Aier's eyes suddenly widened, and she pointed at them. Joanna was not hallucinating. Others saw them too.
She, along with the most of the other students, stared in wonderment and fear as the sparks started to glow brightly... and then there was a cat there. Misty gave a little shriek and dropped her teacup, which shattered against the asphalt. She and her two companions all backed a few steps, all the while staring at the newly arrived cat.
There was something very familiar about that cat, noticed Joanna. It was fairly big and rather shaped like a big pear. Its fur was striped in light pink and magenta, and it was balancing a teapot on its head seemingly without any trouble at all. The most peculiar thing was though that the cat was grinning widely, and it did not seem to be even a bit surprised to find itself at the Jellicle junkyard.
Very familiar. But different.
"It's pink," mumbled Valessia from somewhere behind Joanna. "You think it's a Sue?"
"Not likely," Joanna whispered back. "A Sue would never have that shape..."
The cat looked around. "This is a new place," it stated calmly. It was still grinning.
"Who are you?" asked a brave soul. "What... You're not a Jellicle cat."
"I am a Cheshire Cat," said the cat.
A number of students blinked.
"As in the Alice in Wonderland Cheshire Cat?" asked Joanna finally.
The Cat only grinned. It was disturbingly good at that. It was also starting to look a little... blurry around the edges, as if it was fading away. Its sharp teeth glinted in the moonlight. A number of students shivered.
"Does it have to keep doing that?" muttered Morgailly nervously. "It freaks me out."
"It's the Cheshire Cat," said Chelsea. "I guess that's what it does."
No one said anything else, because at that point, miss Minnaloushe showed up. They had expected her to look angry and demanding a reason for the rude intrusion, but she merely looked surprised.
"We didn't invite you, did we?" she asked the Cheshire Cat. "I'm certain I would have written such a thing down somewhere."
"I am never invited," grinned the Cat, and its tail vanished into thin air. "I'm just here." The tail flickered in and out of existence, as if the Cat couldn't decide on which looked best.
Miss Minnaloushe coughed. "So it seems. Did you... mean to show up here, by any chance?"
"Perhaps I did, and perhaps I... didn't." The Cheshire Cat vanished completely; only its grin was left hanging in the air. "It is quite hard to tell with mad people." Its colourless eyes showed up, hanging above the grin, glittering. "Are you mad as well?"
"I assure you, I am quite sane," snorted miss Minnaloushe.
"Then you are mad. Everyone are mad, everywhere. The people thinking they are sane are the maddest of them all." Its head showed up while the body remained invisible.
"Would you please stop doing that?" Miss Minnaloushe started rubbing her temples. "It is rather difficult to speak with you if you keep disappearing."
The Cat did not reply, but its entire body slowly reappeared, tail and all. It regarded miss Minnaloushe curiously, as if it was waiting to see what she would do next. It seemed fascinated, not intimidated, and that was clearly annoying her.
The course coordinator gave the PPC Agents, who both stood staring wide-eyed at the newcomer, a look. "You two, gather the faculty," she said. "We will talk about this in my office. Right now."
She turned and walked away. Ekwy and Gecka, both knowing that it was best to obey miss Minnaloushe while she was in this mood, saluted hurriedly, sent the fic-writers glares of warning, and took off into the night.
The Cheshire Cat looked at them all in amusement for a bit, and then it stood up and followed miss Minnaloushe, humming a nonsense verse to itself in a monotone voice. "Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird and shun the frumious Bandersnatch..."
"You know this is the second time something pink has destroyed a party at OFUC?" said Misty and chuckled.
Then she went of to find a broom to sweep up the shards of her broken teacup. Leaving that on the ground would have been Bad Form indeed.
Answers to Reviews:
Jemima-luvah: No student at OFUC is dumb enough to fail on purpose. They would get kicked out of the university and not come back, and they would be forbidden to write CATS fanfic ever again. Failing is simply not an option. And the students not celebrating Christmas are still in the mood to party once in a while. So far, I haven't gotten any complaints.
Roman de la Croix: Sure, write it. R-rated stuff is no issue. Have I ever implied that it would?
Eclectica: He does, don't he? After Mistoffelees, I think Skimble has the most minis. He even beats Macavity now.
Antigone: Although relationships isn't exactly what this story is focusing on, the OFUC management has no problem with same-sex relationships at all. :)
Russ chan: Oh yes, I did get your application, no worries.
Korora: That might be. I got my information from a website. I guess this must mean that Mungojerrie isn't a calico at all then.