Promise of Tomorrows
.by Mystic's Oblivion and My Pup
DISCLAIMER: Neither CSI nor Criminal Minds and its characters are in any way mine/ours, and, assuming you don't count my borderline obsession with them, I/we have absolutely notta to do with the shows or CBS or anything else related.
A/N1: This IS a SLASH story! Duh, but in case anyone missed it I thought I'd point it out again.
A/N2: Many, many thanks and kisses to my co-author, My Pup, for her invaluable assistance with the love scenes and for sticking the idea for this in my screwed-up head!
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Spencer Reid was home; not the home where he felt remotely safe and had friends, but the home that gave birth to him, the home that moulded so much of his young life.
Spencer Reid was back in Vegas.
It wasn't as if he was here on a social call, no, this sojourn was work related; he was to testify at the trial of Kyle Harris a serial rapist and kidnapper. Over a year ago, the BAU team had been called to Las Vegas to build a suspect profile, and that profile had proven instrumental in the unsub's capture. Since then, Reid and Dr. Gil Grissom of the Las Vegas crime lab had been in almost constant contact- discussing the case as well as any myriad of other topics. In fact, they had become close friends, so it was no surprise when Grissom arranged for Reid to be the BAU representative called on to testify.
Reid had a simple plan for tonight- check into his hotel, shower, then head down to CSI headquarters to meet with Grissom. He knew that the soonest he'd be needed in court would be the following afternoon, but Reid was nothing if not thorough. It wasn't as if he had anything planned, besides he had been looking forward to talking with his friend face to face.
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Gil Grissom waited with trepidation the arrival of the young doctor from Quantico. Yes, they'd been exchanging e-mail for a year, but Grissom knew his way with people, especially dealing with them in the flesh, and the truth was Spencer Reid made him nervous. He'd tried to put his finger on the cause- Grissom was a scientist after all and hated unanswered questions as much as unverified data- 'getting ahead of the evidence' as he so often put it.
Feeling eyes upon him, Grissom realized someone was watching, looking up he saw Warrick Brown standing in the doorway.
"Sorry, Gris, didn't mean to disturb."
"It's okay Warrick, what's up?"
"Dr. Reid's out front." As Warrick said this he couldn't help but notice the slim smile that crossed his boss' face.
"Thanks, Rick. I'll be right there."
Warrick clicked his tongue as he moved from Grissom's door.
As Grissom made his way to the reception area, he reviewed his mental image of Spencer Reid. Even with a year gone, he could still remember the young man perfectly. His lanky frame, almost feminine. His fine nimble hands. The wrinkle of his brow. The way he pursed his lips almost as if preparing for a kiss. How his hair would transform from being geekily swept back to being attractively mussed by the end of the day, and the eyes that could drill straight into your heart, mind, and soul- he often wondered exactly what Reid saw when he turned those eyes on him.
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"Dr. Grissom," the voice was unmistakable.
Holding out his hand, Gil smiled, "Dr. Reid, good to see you again."
As their hands clasped they shared a small friendly embrace- an act that would have shocked either man's co-workers.
"You need anything or shall we head back to my office?"
Spencer found his hands searching for his pockets, a left-over from more nerve-racked days, "I'm fine at the moment."
"Sure?"
Spencer nodded an affirmative.
Hours later, the two men were still in Grissom's office chatting and occasionally laughing. It was approaching shift change, getting late or maybe early depending on your point of view, so Reid suggested that they get a bite to eat. After some discussion Gil convinced Spencer that they only need take one vehicle- Gil insisted it was no problem for him to grab a cab from the restaurant back to the lab. Settling on a diner near Spencer's hotel, the two were now sitting in silence waiting for their orders.
Spencer noted how the CSI supervisor's features seemed softer than at their previous meeting a year ago. His face, which always held a stern, fatherly, and protective quality, had taken on a more relaxed friendly aspect, something warm lingered behind the analytical eyes that saw everything as evidence and science, even the man's stature was different- calmer somehow. It reminded Spencer of something he'd once read describing how love could change a man inside and out, he had to admit he admired the changes and he couldn't help but wonder if love could truly change a man in these ways and, if so, who the object of his friend's affection was.
Some things hadn't changed in Gil Grissom however, the stony brow that lent such passion to his words, the fire in his eyes, and his obvious discomfort in social situations all still burned fiercely in him. In fact, Gil's uneasiness was palatable, a surprising twist as Spencer had always felt he was the one with fewer social skills. "We could have them bring it carry-out. My hotel is just up the street," Spencer offered carefully to his edgy companion.
Just as Spencer had been observing him, Gil in turn was dissecting Spencer still trying to extract why he unnerved him so. They were friends, so it wasn't that he was an interloper into his world. They were both scientists and students of human nature, so it wasn't a lack of common ground or intellect. Admittedly, they were both reclusive- their work being their lives, but that should have been a comfort, not a problem.
Slowly, a fragment of the puzzle began to emerge in Gil's mind- a difference, a rather glaring difference in his opinion- the man in front of him was beautiful. Gil had never been that concerned with physical beauty but rather intellectual beauty and Spencer Reid had an abundance of both. The realization that followed quickly was like a slap in the face- his fear and anxiety were simply the manifestation of his attraction to Spencer.
He knew the young man offered the invitation innocently, yet for Gil it suddenly became a very loaded question. Fighting down the flurry of butterflies now filling his stomach, he found himself nodding, "Yeah."
The two men got up, it seemed as if Spencer could feel the same butterflies as they now didn't even want to look at each other and, almost embarrassingly, made a point of looking away; waiting, hoping the waitress would come back, if only so they could let her know that they wanted to change their order to carry-out.
"Should I tell the waitress?" Gil asked Spencer in a lame attempt to end the silence.
"Sure," Spencer answered too distracted by the situation to pick up one the true intent of the meaningless question..
A few minutes later, the two men left the restaurant with Gil carrying their food- nicely packed in waterproof boxes with the restaurant's specially designed logo.
Suddenly, Spencer stopped and looking incredibly confused, he started glancing in all directions imaginable.
"Something wrong?" Gil asked.
"Ummm…" Spencer started. "I can't seem to remember where I parked the rental car," Spencer replied as he continued searching.
Gil let go of a smile and actually giggled a tiny bit, it made Spencer's face light up in a warm smile, too, and the pair laughed quickly.
"I seldom drive and what happens when I do? I lose the car," Spencer smiled.
"Can you remember what type of car it was, or maybe even the make of it?"
"Cars," Spencer muttered.
"Colour?" Gil asked .
"Blue-grey with a touch of purple?"
"Ok, it's a start…" Gil smiled.
"Oh, hang on…" Spencer said, taking out the car keys to use the remote that came with it. He pressed the button, and from a short distance off they both heard the beep. "Lost and found," Spencer smiled with a sparkle in the corner of his left eye.
Soon they were both in the car and supposedly on their way, Spencer grabbed the gear stick to change a gear, Gil let go of a silent, "ohhh", short and surprised.
"Sorry," Spencer whispered as he let go of Gil's leg, slightly embarrassed that he had mistaken Gil's leg for the gear shift. "Cars", Spencer muttered once again.
Gil looked out of the window, smiling, still feeling Spencer's quick touch on his leg. The leg, or rather the place where Spencer had touched him, was still warm and Gil surprised himself by actually wishing Spencer's hand was still where he had mistakenly placed it.
It didn't take long to drive the few miles back to Spencer's hotel. The two were quiet the short while they where in the car; they both felt a strange nervousness and tension between them, neither one being able to tell why- they where just going to have dinner in Spencer's hotel room and go through the motions for tomorrow.
"Nice trip here?" Gil asked and regretted the question right away- mainly because it was the second time he had asked.
"Ammm, yes," smiled Spencer as if he could tell the embarrassment Gil felt over asking the question a second time.
"So, Gideon was ok with you flying here alone to do this?"
"Yes, I think he is the only one who doesn't pamper me constantly, sorry..."
"No I understand and I hope you didn't think I meant that."
"No, not at all!"
"You are the youngest in the team, that's all…"
"I know, and I kind of appreciate the pampering sometimes, it gives me a chance to view the more experienced agents for a while, you know, learn to..."
"...not make their mistakes?"
Gil smiled and Spencer lit up a grateful smile, "mm…"
He parked the car close to the hotel, Spencer fumbled with the car keys while trying to put them back into his pocket as they slowly made their way towards the hotel entrance.
"Has there been a lot of writing about the case?", Spencer asked.
"Writing? Oh, writing, writing…" said Gil almost as if a huge memory loss had struck him. "You mean in the papers?"
Spencer nodded.
"Catherine usually deals with those kind of things, I usually stay away and try to… do my things," said Gil and he actually looked a little sad.
Spencer noticed it and stopped.
Gil looked up at Spencer, surprised and with a tad of worry in his eyes over what Spencer's next sentence would be. Spencer was one of the few people who could surprise Gil and that was probably what Gil appreciated the most with him.
"You never got to see the snowflies hatch did you?"
"Nope, Nick managed to flush them down with the oil from a case we had last week," Gil tried to sound as if it wasn't a big deal really as they kept walking.
Spencer stopped again and grabbed Gil's arm; they both looked at the hand on Gil's arm, Spencer let go of it as he stuttered a "sorry."
Gil smiled.
"Flushed , he flushed the eggs down the drain? It took you weeks to even find those…!"
It struck Gil that Spencer was the only one who didn't tease him for his- to others- weird hobby and he was even interested in it. Gil looked at Spencer, wondering who he was, feelings inside of Gil started turning and twisting in a weird mix and he couldn't tell if he liked those feelings or if he would like to run. "It did take me weeks," in an attempt to change the subject to safer territory, "but we will most likely starve if we don't find your room soon," Gil put a small smile on his lips.
Spencer nodded again.
Outside the room, Spencer started fumbling with another set of keys, this time the keys to his room. He dropped them on the floor next to Gil's feet and bent down to get them, along with a quiet word of swearing. Gil rushed down to Spencer's knee level and grabbed Spencer's arm, both of them aware of the rapid heart-beating it led to; they stopped their motions and looked at each other. Neither one said a word, it was silent, they could hear each others hearts beat. They slowly got back up and Gil was still holding Spencer's arm, but more gently than he had been grabbing it. Spencer looked down. Gil fought with feelings that told him to behave and let go of Spencer- he ended up doing the opposite. Instead, he touched Spencer's right cheek with his finger tips and Spencer looked intently at Gil.
"It's just us Spence, you don't have to be nervous… Not before me, you know me".
"It's just…" Spencer stopped.
Gil looked at Spencer as if to say "What?" but he took the keys from Spencer and opened the door; determined to get them out of peoples view just in case there was anyone looking. They went in and Gil closed the door behind them and turned Spencer around to face him. "What Spence?"
"I thought it was only me," Spencer said. Spencer was struggling with the words and thoughts even more, wondering what was going on inside of him.
"Only you what?"
Spencer wiggled free of Gil's grip and started walking back and forth in front of him. He tried to find the words, the right words for something he had never even thought of before and for feelings that were new to him and bubbling inside of him. Spencer pulled his fingers through his hair, looking down, starting a sentence only to take it back the same second the first letter slipped out of his perfectly shaped lips.
Gil almost got amused over his worry and the boyish look he so often let show- especially now.
Spencer gathered his courage and looked up at Gil. "Are we… I mean, what are we… I…?"
Gil turned a confused gaze on Spencer. Suddenly, Gil felt as if he had overstepped some boundary; making him feel incredibly awkward about the whole thing. What was Spencer trying to say? "Think perhaps I should leave and-"
"No, I just meant that…" started Spencer, but Gil's expectations for the rest of the sentence made Spencer go silent as he gave in to his nervousness.
Gil shook his head and put the food on the table; turned around and walked out of the room with a short "I'll see you tomorrow!"
"Gil, I just wanted to..." said Spencer, but Gil was already out of sight. Spencer leaned on the door after he closed it, a small tear fell down his cheek and he shook his head with disappointment in himself. He saw the food and, before he had the time to think, he grabbed it and literally threw it onto the wall above his bed. Then he let go of a deep pounding breath as the food poured down over his pillow. "Oh Gil, I didn't mean it that way, I just wanted to say… damn, I can't even say it to myself!"
Knowing he had to be in court in just a few hours Spencer tried to put thoughts of Gil Grissom out of his mind while he cleaned up enough to make the soiled bed usable.
When he awoke scant hours later, he felt as though his every fibre- mental and physical- had been stretched to breaking point and then some. His eyes supported this notion- the dark circles were deep and tinged with purple just as when he'd been beaten in school. The whites themselves were red and bloodshot- a sign he associated with the kind of streaming tears he last shed over a decade ago. Hoping his appearance, emotions, and head would improve with coffee and a shower, he put on the pot and started running scalding hot water in the bathroom. Within half an hour Spencer was cleaned, dressed, and on his fourth cup of coffee.
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Spencer exited the courtroom tired from his lack of sleep and hours of listening to other people's testimony. All he wanted at the moment was to go back to the hotel and collapse. Unfortunately two things stood in his way, his body required nourishment other than the steady flow of caffeine he'd been pumping into his system since waking and he had to find a cab. He had been too exhausted to trust his driving today.
A voice next to him said, "I see you survived. How was it?"
"Oh, you know your standard exciting day of waiting to testify."
Despite his dry attempt at humour, it was obvious that Spencer, at the least, was completely drained or, at the worst, scarred from their encounter that morning. In a rare attempt to mask his fear that his latter supposition was correct he continued, "Catherine mentioned they hadn't called you yet when she left." Concern got the better of him, his eyes lowered almost imperceptibly, but enough to show the change from authority figure to friend, "you okay?"
Spencer nodded, "just tired and hungry."
"Alright," his eyes narrowed as his brow rose- indicating he was not sure he believed the young man, "well, go home and get some sleep, ok?"
"Yeah… I think a cab and room service are the order of the day." Spencer tried to laugh.
Gil turned to go, then stopped looking over his shoulder his right eye cocked the way it always did when his curiosity was piqued, "a cab?"
Spencer realized he shouldn't have mentioned the cab, but it was too late.
Returning to Spencer's side he placed a warm hand on his friend's shoulder, "would you like a lift."
Spencer didn't know what to do; he really didn't want to deal with a taxi, but he wasn't sure he was ready to be alone with Gil again.
Seeming to sense Spencer's thoughts Gil added in soft muted tones, "I can ask Nick or Catherine?"
The unmistakable care and concern behind that simple offer made Spencer look up. Their eyes met, both men couldn't help but smile, and Spencer found himself wanting nothing more than to have Gil see him home.
He lowered his gaze as the words escaped softly, "Yes... and I'd like you to drive me."
This was music to Gil's ears; maybe he hadn't stepped too far over those unseen boundaries after all. Still, he had no intention of a repeat of that morning.
Patting Spencer's shoulder as he released it, "Okay then. Let me tell Catherine and drop some things off at the office. Then we can be off."
With something akin to relief , which he himself didn't understand, Spencer simply replied, "Great."
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The thick tension from that morning had been replaced by an eerie calm between the two men, as if, rather than something both found terrifying had happened or almost happened, some shared experience had brought them closer together. The silence they shared was soothing, not the uncomfortable silence Spencer thought he should have been feeling. They soon reached Spencer's hotel. As Gil cut the engine and turned to wish his friend goodnight, he saw what may have been the most exquisite and beautiful sight he had ever seen. Spencer Reid sleeping peacefully. He studied the young man for a few minutes knowing he should but not wanting to wake him. Eventually, his ever-present clinical sensibilities won out and he tenderly called Spencer's name, and reaching over brushed the lock of hair caressing his cheek. Spencer leaned into the touch ever so slightly.
Gil almost gasped, his mouth making the movements with no sound emerging. Quickly, he removed his hand speaking Spencer's name loudly- that got through. "We're here."
Spencer blinked as his eyes adjusted. Embarrassment flooded him, "sorry, I guess I'm in more need of sleep than I thought."
As Spencer climbed out of the vehicle, Gil set a strong hand on Spencer's, "Spence, it's okay..." barely audibly, "we're okay."
Spencer couldn't be sure he'd heard Gil's last words correctly- 'we're okay'- but it made him feel better to think he had.
Gil watched the young genius as he entered the hotel lobby before restarting the Tahoe and heading back to the lab.
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The night had stretched out longer than usual for Gil; he found his thoughts constantly straying towards Spencer and away from active cases.
At the end of the night Catherine voiced what the rest of the lab had only dared think, "Gil? You planning on rejoining us tomorrow?"
"Hmm... yeah- yes... Tomorrow." He didn't even bother to try to hide his faux pas. He knew Catherine would pick up the tell-tale signs- the barely perceptible jump, the spontaneous widening and brightening of his intense eyes, and the words that were not spoken in his normally elegant and straightforward manner.
Inviting herself into his office, she closed the door and took a seat in one of the police issue leather chairs, making it clear that she wasn't leaving without answers. She'd never seen Gil like this- it disturbed her. "Out with it."
"Out with what?" Gil's deadpan poker face fully in place.
"Gil, you've hardly been here today."
"I wasn't gone that long," he spouted abashed, hoping his salt and pepper beard hid the flush of his cheeks.
Flipping her head back and to the side, the motion that characterized her annoyance with a situation, she leaned back and waited. Finally as she pushed her blonde hair away from her face, " You've been distracted all night. We've all noticed and we're worried."
Again, she waited for any response. All she got was Gil's thoughtful stare as he absently chewed on the earpiece of his glasses.
"Gil! What's going on?"
With a deep exhalation of breath, Gil set down his glasses, "I don't know, Cath. Just..." he trailed off.
Leaning forward, "just what?"
Casting his eyes downward, he shook his head, "nothing."
This time it was Catherine who sighed, "Right. Should've known not to try to be a friend to the unshakable Gil Grissom."
"I'm not unshakable." Gil said defensively pulling his head up fast snapping out of his self-depreciation.
She shook her head as she got up to leave, muttering, "why do I bother?"
"Hey Catherine. Thank you."
Giving Grissom a wry smile accepting the thanks with the knowledge that the words held great meaning coming from a man like him.
After Catherine left, Gil sat at his desk thinking. Finally, he came to a decision; he would put an end to his confusion and distraction this evening.
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Sitting in his rental car, Spencer tried to decide on his course of action. His head was spinning, the events of the last two days finally consuming his mind and the mixture of emotions overwhelming him. He silently cursed his eidetic memory for so quickly resurrecting images Gil Grissom- eyes encircled by a soft line giving the impression of too many years peering at minutia and pushing glasses onto tired eyes, the distinctive crows feet that rather than aging him accentuated his expressive features, the way the left side of his upper lip rose a bit higher than the right when he smiled- giving a boyish innocence to him. Those eyes. They were the hardest to ignore. Spencer shook himself trying to pull himself back to the here and now. It wasn't quite half past three, he was finished with court and could return to the east coast any time. The problem was he didn't want to, not yet. It wasn't just the obligation he felt to visit his mother, but also the desire to understand what had passed between Gil and himself. He also knew that if he returned now, at least, Gideon would notice his convoluted state of mind and that would lead to questions and conversations he wasn't ready to have. There was only one choice he could logically make- he'd take Gideon up on his offer of a few days off (to go visit his mother presumably, an offer he'd had no intention of accepting) and settle this.
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The phone rang just before four; he'd been waiting for the call and when it came he knew what he had to do. First, he called Catherine to tell her he wouldn't be in tonight. Then he set about getting ready for what might possibly be a defining moment in his life. Gil was about to leave when there was a knock on his door. Without checking the peep-hole he threw the door open ready to shoo the unwanted visitor away. He stopped dead.
"Hi," the meek voice shot straight through Gil's body.
"Hey," was all he managed to say, his eyes darting making him look somewhat like a cornered cat. After a moments hesitation, he remembered himself and invited Spencer in. "Sorry, I was just about to... never mind..."
"You're probably busy," Spencer turned to go.
Gil jumped, "Yes, well, no."
Spencer looked at the older man trying to decrypt what he was saying.
Taking a deep breath, "NO, I'm not busy. Come in."
As he entered the spacious room, Spencer took in every detail. Gil spread an arm indicating Spencer should sit.
"Can I get you some tea or coffee?"
"Sure," Spencer replied absently. It was plain that his mind was somewhere else.
"Ookay? Tea?"
"Sure."
"Be right back then."
By the time the tea was ready, both men had steadied their nerves.
Giving Spencer his cup, "I lied earlier."
Spencer merely looked at him.
"I was on my way out. I wanted to talk to you."
Spencer nodded a little.
"About what happened at the hotel."
That made Spencer suddenly jump, which to his own mind seemed odd since that was precisely why he was here sitting on Gil's couch. His own unexpected movement made him drop the cup of tea on the floor, "damn, I'm sorry…" Spencer half whispered.
Before he had a chance to stretch down, Gil was on all fours on the floor just in front of him saying it was ok and trying to rescue what was left of the cup and drying the wet floor with a towel.
There was silence between them and before Spencer had a time to think about his own actions, he laid his hand on Gil's shoulder, softly stroking him.
Gil looked up at Spencer, almost looking like a small innocent boy. For a minute, Gil let the cleaning up be.
"I just… I wanted… I mean, I think I have feelings for you, Gil, and I wasn't sure of what you wanted to happen between us," Spencer said.
Gil looked down for a moment, he knew Spencer was talking about the hotel incident. He half turned sitting down on the floor as he wrapped his arms around his knees as he faced Spencer. He was trying to find the words… "Does it have to be a decision to make right now, right here, right this moment, can't it be leading us wherever it's leading us?"
Spencer was quiet for a while, thinking of the meaning of those words. "I think I wasn't sure of how you felt about it, just… not sure of what was happening."
Gil nodded his understanding.
"This is new to me, all of it, all the caring about someone like this."
"I know, you told me." Even though it was gone, Gil could still feel Spencer's hand on him. For a few minutes that was all he could think about. He shook his head and got up. "More tea," but before Spencer had answered, he left the room to get a fresh cup of tea.
Confused, Spencer decided to follow him out to the kitchen. "Did I say something wrong?"
Gil looked up perplexed, "no, not at all".
"So, where are we?"
"In my kitchen?" Said Gil with a wide smile, knowing exactly what Spencer really meant.
Spencer let go of a one-sided smile, a bit flushed.
Gil set down the cup of tea and walked the few steps towards Spencer.
With one hand, he stroked Spencer's cheek and Spencer slowly looked into Gil's beautiful blue eyes.
"We are nowhere near a couple of days ago, nowhere near yesterday's hard work, nowhere near tomorrow's new day, but we are here Spencer, here in today, that's where we are."
Starting softly and steadily rising with intensity, "Gil, teach me what touching is, what tenderness is, and, please, teach me what love is…!"
Gil leaned his head slightly to the left, thinking. Thinking of the warmth he felt right now for Spencer. Thinking about how he longed for love himself and wishing he would feel the tenderness of some one's touch, god, how he missed love. He couldn't remember when he last loved a woman or a man- loneliness had started to crawl upon him.
"I can't give any promises of tomorrow Spencer…"
Spencer nodded his understanding, "I understand, I just wish for today, that's all."
Gil leaned even closer to Spencer; slowly letting his lips kiss Spencer softly. Spencer inhaled the sweet taste of Gil's breath as he closed his eyes and let Gil take charge of the kiss.
Soon, they where kissing each other out of pure hunger. It was so intense that they almost lost the ground under them. Gil pushed them both towards the wall, all the time kissing Spencer. Spencer took a firm hold of Gil's plush cheeks, caressing his beard, as Gil took a steadier grip on Spencer's hips and pulled them towards his own. Spencer smiled when he could feel Gil's very endowed penis pressing into him right where his own grew with a speed he had never felt before.
They both gasped for air through the tension between them.
"Touching is…" Gil let one of his hands slide up over Spencer's smooth chest under his shirt and gently played with his nipples. Spencer took a bigger breath as the turn-on of Gil's touch became harder to cope with. It started to drive him mad- that's how good it felt.
"And tenderness is…" as he unbuttoned Spencer's shirt and bent down taking his nipple slowly and tenderly in his mouth.
"Oh, Gil," wheezed Spencer, "damn… that feels so nice!"
Gil straightened himself and his face was just a few inches away from Spencer's, looking him right in his sweet eyes.
Spencer tried to kiss him; Gil intentionally avoided the kiss and the erotic tension between them grew.
"Love is different to us all and comes in many shades and shapes, this is one way to love…" without letting Spencer's eyes go, he unzipped Spencer's pants and gently let them fall to the floor. The belt made a little clinking sound as it hit the floor beneath them; they didn't let the noise distract them as Gil continued with removing Spencer's under pants. When Spencer was more or less naked before him, Gil grabbed Spencer's penis with his hand and started moving it up and down. Spencer let out a low noise of pleasure and Gil sped up the rhythm.
With his free hand Gil took both of Spencer's; stretched them over Spencer's head and held them there as he kissed him hard and fast. Spencer started twisting against the wall feeling pure ecstasy.
Breaking free of the kiss, "Please let me touch you Gil" Spencer begged. Obligingly, Gil helped Spencer get his pants off. Gil had barley lost his pants when Spencer fell to the floor in front of him and suddenly, let his mouth take Gil's penis in it's full length.
"Yeeees," Gil's voice was dark with passion. "God you feel so nice, what are you doing to me?"
Spencer looked up and realized how much he enjoyed his position. He smiled with Gil's penis still in his mouth, teasing it with the tip of his tongue. Experimentally, he licked at the slit relishing the taste of his lover, then ran his tongue along the rim on the head of Gil's swollen penis.
Gil was in heaven. "Are you sure this is your first time?"
As Gil's breath got deeper and faster, Spencer could hear he was close to coming.
Suddenly, Gil grabbed Spencer's head gently pulling him up from the floor. He took Spencer by his arms and lead him to the table in the kitchen, turned Spencer around and leaned him up against the table. Gil admired the beauty of Spencer's well shaped back and studied the smallest wave and curve of it. He licked his finger and let it write tender words on Spencer's back. Spencer blushed as his mind mapped the letters Gil wrote: 'amo te'. Gil's finger didn't stop when it reached Spencer's behind and Gil continued the writing with 'basiatio' Gil then gave Spencer a soft "ready?" and when Spencer nodded with dreamy eyes, Gil gently pushed himself inside of Spencer and rested there, waiting for the muscles to relax a little.
"Ahhh…" Spencer breathed with satisfaction. Pleasure mixed with the mere vestiges of pain as his body accustomized itself to the new sensation.
"Ok?"
"Oh, yeah! Please, take me Gil. I can hardly wait, I want to feel you move inside of me!"
Gil did as he was asked, investigating every inch of Spencer and his depths, and moving with a touch Spencer had never felt- it was warm, gentle, loving, and full of the personality that was Gil.
The two men where no longer silent or whispering. They where loud- letting go of all the feelings they had for each other and had been afraid to show.
Gil caressed Spencer's back and Spencer fumbled to reach Gil's hand.
"I want you to touch me Gil, hold it, make me come, I'm so close!"
Gil leaned down against Spencer's back and took Spencer's penis in his hand and firmly pulled it up and down as he moved inside of Spencer at the same time.
"Wait for me, let me know when you are close Spence!"
The sensations he was feeling were overwhelming. Every move, twitch, and thrust Spencer could feel with unnerving accuracy; stroke after stroke of Gil inside him, while his muscles acted as if of their own volition- tightening, squeezing, and rippling giving exquisite pleasure to both men.
"I'm close Gil, I'm so close…!"
Spencer could feel Gil getting to the crucial point and when the climax came they came together.
Gil giggled a little still leaning on Spencer's back, stroking it. His hearing sharpened when he heard Spencer quietly crying.
"Spence?"
Gil turned Spencer around and pulled him against him in a hard tight hug.
"That was so beautiful, YOU are so beautiful, thank you so much!"
Taking Spencer's head in his hands, Gil looked him in the eyes. "You don't have to say thank you, it was meant to be Spence!"
Spencer smiled with tears running down his cheeks.
"So… what are you doing tomorrow?" Gil smiled.
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Epilogue
The past few days had brought about changes in Spencer's life in ways he had only imagined possible. First and foremost, he was in love and, more amazing to him, loved in return. Their lives being on separate coasts did mean a great deal of time apart, but both he and Gil wanted each other enough to cherish what time they could have. The time apart would mean physical separation, something they would both miss, but as neither man had been in a serious relationship for a long time (well, in Spencer's case, never) it seemed the least of their problems.
As Spencer sat on the plane taking him back to D.C. he thought about Gil. About the tears shed as they left each other at the airport; the tender touches and hugs that they wouldn't share again for some time. He also thought about the present he had arranged to be left for Gil when he got home…
Somehow Gil made it through work that night, but now that he was home all he wanted was to curl up and cry. God he missed Spencer- and he hadn't even been gone a full day.
As he made his way to his condo, Gil noticed a package stood at his door. It was a small package marked with elegant handwriting, handwriting he'd grown to know intimately. Smiling wider than there should have been reason for, he gathered the box in his arms cradling it as he opened his door. Setting it down on the kitchen table he carefully opened it. The first thing he saw was the letter, not wanting to be too eager he decided to read it first before continuing his examination of the box. In the same beautiful hand as the address on the package he read:
My Dearest Gil,
I know how much it hurts you to lose an opportunity, I also know how much it hurts to be apart. I thought these might bring you a little happiness, even if it's only for a seemingly fleeting moment.
All my love, SpencerTurning his attention back to the box on the table, Gil took out a small glass container and began to cry.
Spencer had found them somehow… snowflies. Between the tears, Gil read the label on the container where the species name would normally be- it simply read "Tomorrow".
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Note re the Latin: 'Amo te' is, of course, 'I love you', and yes I know when Latin is taught they teach it as 'Ego amo te' but in translation the 'ego' is redundant and I assume the characters would know that. 'Basiatio' translates as 'a kiss' or 'to give a kiss'.