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Selfish Desires

Chapter One - The First Time

Elena Gilbert P.O.V

We'd just made love for the very first time. I'd allowed myself to finally open up and explore my feelings for Damon and now he lay asleep next to me. We were naked together both mentally and physically and I had never felt more alive in my life. He was resting very peacefully but I couldn't seem to find my own tranquillity, ever since I turned into a vampire sleep had not been my friend. In fact everything about me had changed and magnified, not just my feelings towards Damon but how I also felt about myself.

I knew when I showed up at his door tonight what I wanted to happen or at least hoped would happen. Part of me secretly hoped that after all this time that Damon wouldn't want to take things slowly between us and thankfully he hadn't. We had talked, we had shared and even danced together before we equally decided to make love. The only part of the evening that I hadn't expected was the way I had acted after we began to kiss.

It wasn't the first time we had kissed but it was the first time we kissed with such intensity behind it. Damon didn't know and I'd never admit it to him in a thousand years but he kissed me like Stefan use to kiss me. It was gentle, slow and for my pleasure instead of his own. It wasn't as if I felt like I was kissing Stefan all over again, indeed far from it, Damon smelt different, he felt different against me, his skin was different and even his finger tips did things to my body.

And yet there was a problem.

Me.

I knew the second I pushed Damon against the wall and knocked over whatever stood in our way that I had caught him completely off guard. But I had brought my lips against his in an effort to stop him from over thinking it all. I was the one who began to take things to the next level and in that moment I was the one in control of us and I hated that feeling. I wanted Damon to dominate me in a way I had never felt before, I wanted selfish and passionate sex, I wanted to feel epic.

I hated myself for my feelings, for these selfish desires that held onto me tighter in that moment than Damon did. Even as he pushed me against the fireplace and brought my leg up to his waist, I was the one pushing my centre into his and deepening our kiss.

Almost an hour later and it was official Stefan and I were over and Damon and I had made love for the first time. As I had watched Damon drift off to sleep a part of me did begin to hate myself for allowing things to move so quickly between us considering it was only yesterday that Stefan and I had broken up. I took a moment to look down at my naked self and the small markings over my already healing body that Damon had caused. The thing about being a new vampire was feeling everything almost ten times the average which meant my guilt felt like it might just suffocate me.

Part of me would always love Stefan, he was my first love and if it wasn't for him I wouldn't have made it out of that hole I had put myself in after my parent's died. My friends didn't see all the in between moments that Stefan and I had shared, the nights he would come over to my house even before we had began sleeping together, where we just talk for hours and hours until I fell asleep, those epic talks that you just know you'll remember for the rest of your life. Stefan had done so much with his life already and over the course of our relationship his life experiences had helped shape us into what we became, he made us strong, he kept us level and I was glad he was my first.

I would never regret that.

But things were so much different between Damon and I and that flame however small had always been there, burning between both of us over the course of the past few years. Very early on Damon had made it clear that he was attracted to me, we had many stolen moments together that no one knew about but us and I hated myself for that. I hated giving him a second more of time than he deserved, time that could have been spent with Stefan and yet, it felt good to be desired.

There was something primal about knowing someone desired you, knowing they wanted to be with you, to touch you and make you their own. I wasn't going to lie to myself anymore and pretend that over the years when I was with Stefan that Damon hadn't made me feel sexy. Sometimes he'd just look at me and we would know what he was thinking.

Things were different now between us, I felt differently about us. Now that Damon had told me he loved me and even tonight we hadn't had sex but instead made love. He had even asked me if I was alright during the act and although it was sweet and tender, I thought there would have been more between us. The way Katherine had described sex between her and Damon she made it sound so passionate. It had been a long day and he was obviously tired but I thought being with me would have kept us up longer.

I didn't like my own thoughts, I sounded like I wasn't satisfied when I was. What Damon and I had shared was beautiful and it was passionate, I just thought there would have been a bit more to it. I wanted to kiss him awake, to show him I could handle more than he thought. But I didn't have the heart to wake him, no that wasn't true. The truth was I didn't want to wake him and have him think differently of me.

Damon would probably think the human me would have been happy to fall asleep in his arms but the new vampire me hadn't gotten her fill. I never felt like a very sexual person in the past and not even after Stefan and I began making love. But everything was different now I was a vampire, every nerve in my body craved more out of life and demanded more out of me. Sometimes I just couldn't shut off my growing urges and I just had to let my mind explore before I exploded.

When I first became a vampire I thought that blood was going to be my biggest weakness, the thing that would keep me up at night and yet this wasn't the case for me at all. I couldn't lie to myself, there was a growing darkness within me that craved something beyond what Damon and I had shared tonight. I felt awful, sick and ashamed of myself for not feeling fulfilled, I felt almost like a completely different person whenever this darkness clawed it's way up to the surface of my being.

Suddenly I would become very aware of my body, my nipples would harden and there was an uncontrollable tightening between my legs that made the hairs on my neck stand on end. It was as if the vampire within me was awakening and wanting its fill and it wanted more than blood, shamefully it wanted nothing but sex. My dreams had become wild over these past few weeks since turning, in my dreams Stefan and I had done things beyond my imagining. But then I would wake up to find the darkness gone and I didn't like my thoughts.

There was no possible way of asking any of the vampires I knew if they too had experienced this after they had turned. I didn't want them to look at me like I had changed when I had not, I was still very much me within. This darkness was not of my making and so I couldn't be held responsible for whatever it did to me.

My imagination had been on fire, I would imagine Stefan taking me into the bathroom stall of The Grill and bending me over like an animal just so he could have his way. In my imagination sometimes it didn't even matter if I came it only mattered if he did. I wanted him to get his fill of me and be done with it. I hated how it made me sound but it didn't change the way I felt about myself. I didn't hate myself and my self esteem hadn't taken a dip since becoming a vampire. There was just something primal right now about men wanting me.

In my dreams sometimes it wasn't even Stefan or if I'm being really honest it wasn't even Damon who was giving me orgasms.

Sometimes I'd dream of strangers, sometimes of married men, feeling their wedding rings against my skin as they risked their marriage just to be with me for a single night.

My skin would glow red hot almost like my blood was boiling within and suddenly all I wanted was to satisfy and be desired. I wanted to see that look in someone's eye when they looked at me. I wanted to feel beautiful to someone beyond the people I surrounded myself with almost everyday like some sort of shield to keep the darkness in check and remind me of who I was.

My life right now was a disaster and after what happened today at the Miss Mystic Falls event it was no wonder that I was having all these insane thoughts. That's what these thoughts were, they were absolutely insane and not to be acted upon. If I did act upon them I would hate myself for the rest of my life, unable to forgive or forget what I had allowed. Damon was all I needed now and by the looks of it he was all I had considering the way some of my friends had been treating me since I became a vampire.

Besides if I ever did act on these desires then someone would find out and Damon would be devastated. Mystic Falls was a very small town and eventually everyone knew everyone's business and if I ever did lose my mind and sleep with someone who wasn't Damon, I would be a social outcast, he wouldn't look at me again and none of my friends would understand my actions. They would all turn away from me in anger and I don't think I could even live here anymore of that ever happened. Knowing I could hurt Damon and them so much would just kill me.

Besides if for whatever crazy reason I did accidently allow myself to explore these desires then I would need to take charge of what occurred from start to finish.

I would need it to be with someone I didn't know and who didn't know me either. As cheap and disgusting as it sounds I wouldn't even want them to look at me during. God that made me sound so weak and pathetic but damn it, it was true at the same time. Maybe if we each wore a mask or something? Then we'd never know the reality behind the masks and my identity would be a secret.

I began to bite my lip at the mere idea of it and decide to let my mind wonder just a little longer.

People hook up with strangers all the time, they get in and get out without even numbers exchanged. It wasn't as if I was the only one in the world to ever consider doing this. I wouldn't even have to give him my own name, I could have him call me anything I wanted, I could even call myself...Katherine. Who only knows how many times she had sex with strangers just for the mere thrill of it.

I sat myself up in bed and Damon turned on his side away from me. He wouldn't be awake until morning now, deep down I hoped this wasn't to be the case in the future whenever we had sex. Stefan and I would cuddle and talk after sex sometimes for hours, we were never closer than in those moments. I wasn't about to compare the brothers, if I did than I was just like Katherine and using them as toys and that wasn't who I was.

This darkness wasn't me. But it held such power over me that I couldn't escape.

I ran my fingers across my lips and I knew I was growing hungry. If I did do this, go out there and find someone to take control of this darkness and shut it back in its cage than I had to be smart. I had to be really freaking smart so this would never ever happen ever again! This had to be a one time thing, a moment of madness that I would somehow need to learn to live with in time. Just the idea of acting on this made me sick to my stomach but the idea of letting this darkness grow instead of feeding it was too much to bare.

I couldn't do this! I couldn't just go out there and cheat on Damon because I felt...horny.

God how I hated that stupid word but it was true! I couldn't control what was happening within me. I needed something more than making love I needed sex! This was the vampire within me it had to be. I wasn't the type of girl who went out there looking for a quick thrill. I wanted to be here in this moment with Damon, I wanted to feel relaxed and content after making love but instead I was sinking. I was sinking beside him and he had no idea.

This wasn't his fault it was mine!

I took my phone from the nightstand and on my tip toes I left the room and disappeared downstairs and into the furthest possible room from Damon's bedroom, which was one of the guest bathrooms behind the kitchen. It took over an hour for me to find the courage to actually do it, to go online and look for an app which would find willing men looking for an anonymous hook up.

There was only one problem, I had to say what I wanted.

How could I possibly answer this? I had no idea what I wanted. I didn't even know how I felt about all of this. So I fed the darkness, I closed my eyes and let the darkness within wash over me like a power shower, it hit me hard and in all the right places, making me warm and even ticklish.

We wear masks. No names exchanged. One night only.

There it was the ugly truth of my desires in black and white. The second I put the message out there I regretted it. This message would only go out to men within a ten mile radius which meant whoever saw this was a resident in Mystic Falls and for all I knew they were from my school or worse they were secretly married. No it was more than that, they could be dangerous! How did I not let this enter my mind until right this second? WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH ME?

I was a vampire but the danger was still very real. Anything could happen to me out there alone. What the hell was I thinking?

They might not wear a mask, they might even take mine off. They might want me to do something I'm not comfortable with. They could be really heavy and sweaty or even old and wrinkly.

My phone binged!

I picked it up faster than you would have believed and quickly read the message left for me.

Meet me. One hour. The alleyway behind The Grill.

Someone had answered!

Some stranger had actually agreed to my terms. They wanted to meet with me and in an hour, they weren't messing around they clearly knew what they wanted. Whoever this was, this stranger wanted to have sex with me behind The Grill. There was an immediate tightening between my legs and I read and re-read the message over and over, they knew what they wanted and where, how could I be so turned on by a stranger's message?

Gosh the alleyway behind The Grill...

Everyone parked behind The Grill it was a good spot to avoid paying the metres around town. But there was also cameras in that area, I knew because I had saw them being installed. The owner of The Grill had gotten them after a break in one night, in which I believe they lost over five thousand from their safe in total.

Strangely the idea of being caught didn't hold me for very long.

He had agreed to my terms, both of us would be wearing masks. Even if we were caught on cameras which I prayed we would not. No one would even know it was me.

If we were caught, I would have a sex video out there as would he.

I slid myself up from the bathroom floor and headed down the hall to where I had left my luggage that I brought with me tonight. I couldn't stay in the house while Jeremy was suffering the effects of the hunter's mark. From my luggage I retrieved my make up bag and a dress I had planned to return to the store as it was just a little too daring for me.

It was a white structured contour bib one shoulder cut out bodycon dress (A/N which can be found on PrettyLittleThings)

Along with that with the assistance of my phone torch I looked out a pair of black platforms still with the tags on them, then went on to retrieve some underwear only to pause and look back at my dress...instead of selecting both a bra and some underwear I only took some underwear and decided to go braless.

It was daring but this entire situation was daring.

I returned to the bathroom and locked the door behind me, I had to shower there was no avoiding it. Even with vampire hearing there was no way Damon would hear me in this part of the house. So I showered, I shaved my legs and removed what little hair I had between my legs. I knew the second I got back I would be right back here scrubbing myself clean like there was no tomorrow. I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around myself and used a travel sized bottle of toner I had in my make up bag to clean my face before brushing out my hair and brushing my teeth. Now I felt clean enough to begin layering myself up to perfection.

Whoever this person was tonight all they got was my body and not my mind and in order for me to do that I needed layers. So I began with my make up, I went light on my foundation around my face and neck, but went heavy on my eye shadow choosing a rather dark chocolate brown with a light shimmer to it. I added mascara before choosing to go the whole way and added some very captivating false eye lashes which did wonders for my eyes, especially after I added my black eyeliner to my upper line and water line. I choose a hot pink lipstick which was matte and took more time applying that just right than for I did both my eyes.

I lined my lip perfectly before adding on the hot pink matte finish. (A/N the hot pink 24 hour matt liquid lipstick can be found on Amorususa)

I knew what I looked like and I knew it's how I felt inside about in that moment.

My stomach was in knots and I wanted just to be sick and get it over with finally. But I held it together somehow I wasn't sure how. I put on body spray but not my perfume I didn't want to smell like me tonight.

I had already planned to get rid of everything I wore and used tonight. This whole thing was a mistake but it was a mistake I was making of my own choice and only I would have to live with it. I'd hated myself already and the night hadn't even began. I slid the black lace thong up my legs and looked myself in the mirror as I slid on the dress. You could see the underwear through the dress but at least it was a sexy little thong and not my overstretched cotton panties. Already my nipples were hard beneath the fabric.

Not that it mattered no one was going to see me but him and I couldn't care less what he thought of me anyway.

I cleaned up the bathroom and got rid of any evidence of me being in here. I unlocked the door and made my way down the hallway towards the library, in the furthest corner of the room there was a glass display cabinet, inside was a mask that I had remembered admiring upon one of my first trips to the boarding house. I took it out of the cabinet with care and checked that it would frame my face just right which it did, there was even a tie back on it.

It was a stunning piece.

It was a Dama luxury masquerade ball mask in white (A/N which can be found on simplymasquerade)

I took it off before heading out of the room and checked the hallway again before entering it. I collected my phone, heels and my black cropped jacket along with my copy of the house key so I could get back in later. When I stepped outside I immediately shivered from the cold, it was at least two in the morning and pitch black outside. I stepped out onto the doorstep where I proceeded to put on my heels and jacket before heading to my car.

I told myself not to stop no matter what. If I didn't do this now then this darkness within me would only get worse. I got into the car and headed towards the town without pause. I knew what I was doing and it made me sick, my stomach was in knots over the idea of what might happen to me and even worse, the idea that Damon might find out about it. The idea of him finding out I went from making love to him and straight into the arms of another man made me want to slam down hard on the brakes but I didn't. Something was going on within me, something very twisted and if I didn't figure it out than it was only going to get worse with time.

The town was empty as I had anticipated, there was nothing but the hum from the street lights that lined the town square. I drove with my window down in order to keep my skin from boiling, the car air conditioning on full just wasn't enough for the job. I drove past The Grill and there were no cars parked outside it, I had exactly two minutes before I was set to meet him and I wasn't sure I could. I had dressed up and made myself into someone I didn't recognise in order to have anonymous sex with a stranger who didn't mind that I didn't want them to see my face.

What did that say about me? What did that say about him?

Anything could happen inside that alleyway.

But then again it might all just go right and tomorrow morning I could wake up as myself again, free of this darkness. Was it worth the risk of the unknown before me? Yes I suppose in a way it was. If I acted out the way I wanted with Damon he might not love me anymore, there wasn't a single part of me that loved the darkness within me, I feared it and yet I had to feed it in order to cage it once and for all. Damon loved the girl he fell in love with, on that night he found me on the phone to my mom, the night my parents died, he saw a beautiful and helpless girl and he loved me right then and there. He had been through some dark times himself but there was no way he could understand this darkness within me now, not even I could understand it.

I parked my car behind the bakery just a few stores down from The Grill where my car would be out of sight and yet close enough if I should need it. I turned on the light in my car and checked my reflection, surprisingly all my makeup was as flawless as when I had applied it. I reached over for the mask resting on the passenger seat and watched my reflection as I put it on. I was sure to knot it tight in the back to ensure it wouldn't fall off. I slid my jacket off and tossed it into the back seat leaving me in just my heels, dress and mask.

I shut off the light and sat in the dark for a moment before reaching for the handle and finally got out of the car. This was actually happening, I was doing this, I couldn't believe it. Due to my choice of footwear I was painfully aware of every step I took in my platforms as I made my way down the street in the direction of The Grill. There was still no sign of a car or any sounds to suggest I was any less than completely alone. I told myself if I looked into the alleyway and found no one there than I would just continue walking. That was what I had decided and would stick too.

I could feel my heart leaping around in my chest as the fear sunk in, not to mention the guilt. Poor Damon was asleep at home without a clue as to where I was or what I was up to and that thought threatened tears. But I continued regardless of all of it.

When I arrived at the alleyway beside The Grill I peeked my head around the corner and swallowed hard at the sight before me.

Through the darkness stood a tall figure with broad shoulders. He had both hands in the pockets of his trousers, his posture was straight, he appeared lean but as I said large around his shoulders. I couldn't see his face and yet something told me he was looking right back at me, he was waiting for me, he was here because he wanted to do things to me. I just pleaded in my mind that all he wanted was to do things to me and didn't expect anything in return. As strange as it sounded I would feel more like a cheater if I performed acts on him than I would if he just did things to me instead.

I wasn't going to kiss him. No that was simply far too intimate. This was about sex, not intimacy.

I swallowed hard and made my way to the front of the alley, finally giving him a proper view of me, seeing me in my figure hugging dress, my platforms and my mask. He stared at me for but a moment before he began to walk backwards, I watched him very closely as he tilted his head to one side and disappeared around the corner of the building and out of my view.

I wanted to run and just forget this entire thing ever happened but I didn't. I instead made my way into the alleyway and off the side walk, following him. Did I want this to happen? I wasn't sure. If it didn't feel right I could just vamp speed my way out of there and that would be the end of it.

The alleyway wasn't as you would expect, the owner of The Grill's wife was always out here twice a week with a hard bristle brush and at least two bottles of bleach. Matt said she would spend hours out here scrubbing the ground, she couldn't stand the scent of old alcohol, she didn't even like garbage days, she couldn't stand the smell of the pick up trucks. There was nothing lining the alleyway, no trash bags or discarded boxes of beer.

I slowed my pace as I edged closer to the corner that would bring me to him. The alleyway was just as dark if not darker the further in I got which only added to my growing anxiety.

When I rounded the corner I found him there waiting for me, even in the dark I could see his mask but not his face.

It was a cavalli ventain masquerade ball mask, it was a beautiful gold base in the barocco style decorated with many crystals (A/N which can be found on simplymasquerade)

As I breathed deeply I breathed him in too and he was mouth watering to me.

With my new senses I could smell everything, the product in his hair, the aftershave he'd applied, the rich scent of fabric softener used on his clothes and the new leather scent from his belt and shoes.

He towered over me even with my platforms on, this brought him to a new level. There was just something about tall men that did something to me that I didn't know I even looked for in men until that second.

He reached out for me then without a hint of hesitation and pulled me towards him until we were face to face and I looked up into his eyes. His eyes were dark blue and somewhat familiar to me. I watched them drift down to my lips taking in the hot pink colour that I had selected, well selected for him now it would seem.

Then out of nowhere he turned me against the nearest wall behind me and pressed my cheek very lightly against the brick, the cold did wonders for my hot skin. I was breathing hard and it wasn't escaping his notice, he pressed his body against mine and brought his face through my hair and against the side of my neck, breathing me in deeply like an animal.

My eyes rolled into the back of my head, hearing him groan in delight of it. I quickly gasped then when he suddenly pressed himself against me and I felt the length of him against my butt cheek. His hand quickly found that same butt cheek and he squeezed it firmly. Tears pricked my eyes but not in fear but rather excitement. I couldn't recall Stefan or Damon ever gripping my butt in this manner before, this guy clearly wasn't afraid to bruise me to make his desire to caress my body however he wished clear.

I wasn't the type to talk dirty or talk period during sex and yet right now it was all I wanted to do.

"Again" I whispered so softly he might not even hear me, I tilted my neck back allowing him access to it.

With a groan from the deepest depth of his throat he slid both his palms all the way down my back all the way down to my butt where he gripped both cheeks. He wasn't afraid to explore and do whatever he wanted with my body which I was slowly getting on board with the further we were taking this.

He squeezed both my butt cheeks while he tucked his head into my neck and ran his tongue from the base of my neck to the top making me reach out and grip the edge of the wall in response.

"I don't want to kiss" I gasped

"Yes you do" He said clearly deepening his voice to disguise it.

With that he brought his lips crashing down upon mine and within a second his tongue found its way into my mouth. Before I could even let the guilt of letting him kiss me wash over me, he caught me off guard again by tucking both his hands under my arms and casting them down upon my breasts making me gasp against his lips and return his kiss as he began to caress both breasts at once.

"Keep kissing me" He said against my lips as I moaned against them then as he squeezed both my breasts hard bringing my back hard against his chest.

My nipples hardened under his touch quickly which pleased him as his tongue pushed further into my mouth demanding my own. I returned his kiss as he demanded and even found my hand cupping his face to keep him close to me. I brought that same hand up behind his neck and dug my nails into his skin feeling his blood push up to the surface of his skin and into my nails.

He took my lower lip into his mouth giving it a gentle suck in response before we began to kiss once more. When his hand found its way under the neckline of my dress I went up on my tip toes in response, pushing myself into his touch wanting more as his large hand grasped my bare breast, feeling his hot palm against my nipple, my body was doing all the talking for me.

"Ohhhhh, k-keep t-t-touching meeeee" I begged softly before his lips returned to mine which I welcomed despite my guilt.

Some guys were just incredible kissers and he was indeed truly, without a single doubt in my mind, right here, right now, he was thee best kiss of my entire life. I shouldn't have kissed him, I shouldn't have been here with him at all and yet I was going to remember his kiss forever.

I'd never kissed someone for so long that my tongue was actually tired but it was. You think a kiss with that much tongue would be uncomfortable and too much to handle and yet he found that happy medium of the balance it demanded for utter perfection to be had. I brought my hand upon his as he continued to massage my breast through my dress. I wanted to feel his hands, I wanted to know his hands and they were soft to the touch.

He pushed me up against the wall and broke our kiss then, I turned my head to look away from him and to catch my breath as he began to rotate his hips upward, and I felt the length of him against me. He was hard, I had made him hard. This stranger wanted me, he wanted me now. Between my legs I was tightening up, I could feel the moisture pooling between my thighs, he was making me wet.

I gasped when in one swift movement he brought my dress up over my hips exposing my thong. Feeling me tense up against him he quickly turned my head towards him and demanded my lips once more which I accepted. He would have my lipstick all over his mouth by the time we were done and just the idea of that made me wet. Knowing I was leaving my own little mark upon him, giving him a small memory of tonight.

My lips left his when I heard him unbuckling his belt but he quickly brought his hand to the back of my head pulling me back to him wanting my lips against his. For the first time I was the one who pushed my tongue forward first and entered his mouth.

His lips left mine and he brought his hand down to my ankle and worked it all the way up my left leg making me pant as it edged over my knee and up my inner thigh, finally brushing his hand over my lace thong teasing me through my underwear. I let out such a moan at that, leaving him no choice but to silence me with another kiss.

I moaned against his lips then when he unzipped himself in a hurry before reaching between my legs and pushing my underwear to one side. His lips left mine and he sucked hard on my neck as he used his leg to push my legs apart. My eyes rolled into the back of my head for in that moment he brought himself between my legs, rubbing himself between my lips, teasing me, feeling how wet he had made me.

He groaned and I was practically jumping up and down in the spot as he began working both my breasts between his hands whilst pushing his cock between the top of my thighs.

"Tell me you want it" He said through his deepened voice.

He had a bit of a batman thing working for him and I was in love with it.

I nodded my head but he took a tight grip of my hair in return tilting my head back to his shoulder making me squeal.

"Tell me" He said against my neck before placing a single kiss on it.

I moaned feeling his hot breath against my neck, I enjoyed teasing him just as much as he enjoyed teasing me.

"Tell me" He repeated and this time licked my neck knowing what it did to me.

"I w-ant, god you know I want it" I said not even sounding like myself in that moment

I turned my head around demanding his lips.

With that I sunk my knees down and arched my back as he proceeded to bend me over and take control of my body. He kept my underwear on as he finally pushed himself into me. He was actually doing it and I was allowing it, he was bending me over in an alleyway.

My jaw dropped and I found myself gripping onto the drain pipe in front of me as I attempted to take him in. I hissed and clenched my teeth together as I took in the girth of him.

"Jesus" He groaned as he felt himself stretching me out.

He was big and he was very, very thick.

He pulled himself out of me then and I gasped at the gap he had left. Behind me I could hear him doing something but I kept my eyes forward, he brought his hand around my neck as I felt his hand and something cold come between my legs.

"What are you doing?" I asked through short fast breaths.

I gasped as he pushed something inside of me then, something hard and sleek, with some pressure against the object, a cold liquid entered me and he pulled the object back out as it did. He had actually brought lube with him, he was confident about his size and he clearly knew what it did to women. He brought this for my own comfort and knowing he did that made me want to kiss him.

"Kiss me" I begged him and he did.

He kissed me as he entered me again all at once. He cupped my cheek as he kissed me this time and I too brought my hand to his cheek brushing my fingers around his ear, cheek and jaw, wanting to feel more of him as he slid inside of me.

When he was ready he bent me over again and I gripped the drain pipe once again. He thrusted into me hard catching me completely off guard in that moment, he quickly delivered a spank to my right ass cheek making me groan in a way I had never before. I even found myself licking my lips which he did not see. He brought both his hands down hard upon my hips and began to thrust in and out of me, I could feel the lube working a treat within and heating us allowing me to adjust to his girth.

"Keep both your hands together above your head" He instructed me

I did, I followed his instructions wanting nothing more than for him to continue. I was moaning in a manner that would scare alley cats away, we weren't making love that much was obvious by our positioning, this was flat out fucking. I hated the term but there it was, I was being fucked, he was fucking me. He didn't know me, he didn't love me and yet he was inside of me.

"You are soooo-" I paused biting my lip as he continued "Big" I said and let go of my lower lip to moan and flicked my hair back.

He sent my eyes into the back of my head then as he leaned down and kissed my left butt cheek before he returned to thrusting. He continued to spank me without slowing a single one of his thrusts.

My mouth was hanging open as he continued his mighty thrusts, not slowing down for a second. I could feel every inch of him moving deep within me, he wasn't afraid to push me to the limit, he was thick and veiny, there was a little pain but it was bearable and pleasurable. But to look at me would have been a sight, my mouth hanging open, my eyes threatening to pop right out of their sockets as I tried to keep up with him.

"I need you" I found myself gasping

He pulled me upright immediately and I turned my head to meet his lips bringing both my arms around behind him as he tucked my dress up over my breasts exposing them to the cold night air. I opened my mouth and brought my tongue against his massaging them together, it was as if I'd never been kissed before, not until tonight, not until him.

"Bend over" He demanded sending vibrations through my body until every nerve ending within me stood on end.

I kissed him once more before he bent me back over and began to thrust inside of me once more, bringing his hand around between my legs to tease and play with me as he went completely balls deep. If it wasn't for the lube I would have been bleeding for sure.

You could hear the sloshing below but it wasn't uncomfortable and it wasn't the lube, it was me, I was so wet for him, I'd never been so wet in my life, if I was having sex with Damon I would have been embarrassed by it, but there was something about being with this stranger, I loved being wet for him, I loved that he was the one making me wet. He was just so thick, he was stretching me out for sure.

He was bigger than Stefan and very thick compared to Damon.

The thought threatened to break me as he threatened to break me in half with his mighty cock.

"Keep doing it" I pleaded gripping the drain pipe.

I was sweating like a pig, I could feel the sweat running down my butt and over my thighs, my hair was sticking to my forehead and cheek. My entire body was shaking from the shock and excitement he was giving me.

"Tell me you want me" I begged him

He answered with a spank to my butt cheek making me squeal and almost give my butt a shake in response but I held back.

"I want you" I confessed to him and he brought both his hands over mine holding them for a moment before moving his hands down hard upon my shoulders gripping them both as he sped up his thrusts.

"I want you" I repeated and brought my hand behind my back reaching for his own placing it upon my left breast which he grasped tightly, my nipple hard against my palm.

I did want him. In that moment there was nothing but us and together we had this passion that I couldn't put into words, I could only show with my actions, I spaced my legs apart and bent further forward encouraging him to go deeper. I didn't have to worry about getting pregnant anymore and the idea of letting him come inside of me was making me drool. If I let him do this, I was telling him something about myself, that I had not only unprotected sex but I willingly let him come inside of me. What would he think of me if I did?

Stefan never once came inside of me for some reason he always pulled out and came just outside. Damon also tonight had started to come inside of me but he too just finished on my stomach which I hadn't expected, it was strange to have someone come on me like that, a bit like porn I suppose but all I had to do was explain that wasn't for me and hopefully he wouldn't mind. The stranger however I didn't even feel the need to ask what he wanted, it was as if we had both already agreed to it.

"Baby" I whispered to him not sure if he even heard me over his own groans.

I felt myself tense up around him which only made him increase the speed of his thrusts to my delight.

As I came I threw myself up right and pushed my back into his sweaty chest as I felt him explode within me to my delight and horror. I could feel his sweaty cheek against mine as we both attempted to catch our breath. I brought my hand around the back of his neck feeling his sweat between my fingers, he licked my cheek ever so slightly before kissing it.

It was the most intense orgasm of my life, I was still pulsing around him, draining him of his cum. He was still within me, holding me in place against him.

This was thee most selfish, thoughtless and shameful act of my entire life. Everything became too real too fast as he pulled himself out from within me and stepped away from me. I looked down at myself, he kept my thong on while he had his way, he hadn't even bothered to remove it, just part it, my dress was up around my shoulders so this perfect stranger had access to my breasts, I had let him do this.

I pulled my dress down quickly and pushed my legs together as I felt cum spill out from inside me then, falling out of me and smearing against my underwear. There was a lot...a lot a lot.

I listened to him behind me zipping himself up and buckling his belt. I knew what I was I just didn't have the strength to call myself any names in that moment. He stepped behind me at that, I closed my eyes as he kissed the side of my head very softly. It was over. He was breathing me in one last time as if he was savouring the moment, a moment never to be repeated. Why did my heart ache at the idea of never being with him again? How could I even let my emotions have a say right now? This was just supposed to be purely physical.

"Take care, love"

My heart stopped.

No more disguised voices and no denying who was the man behind that mask.

I had just had sex with Klaus Mikaelson.

Klaus had just came inside of me and given me thee most intense orgasm of my life.

In that moment I wanted to die.

Oh my god Elena!

What will she do next?

Will she confess her one night stand to Damon?

How will Klaus react when he learns he has slept with her?

Will it happen again?

End of Selfish Desires - Chapter 1.

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