A/N: Many thanks to everyone who's reviewed/ followed this story! It means more than you know to see a review alert in my inbox :) This chapter was inspired by Kygo, Gryffin and Calum Scott's Woke up in Love. I hope you enjoy it( and the last chapter which seems to have been posted when alerts weren't working). The poem recited later on is by EE Cummings. To everyone in the States Happy Thanksgiving! I am truly grateful for this fandom and all the wonderful people on here especially my friends windbound and Zygon24.
As he clawed his way through the fog, Gil Grissom realized that he was in one of those weird states of consciousness where you knew you were dreaming but there was nothing you could do about it.
He walked into his office and encountered paperwork as far as the eye could see. His desk and floor were completely covered and the piles seemed to grow before his eyes. He groaned and closed the office door only to be accosted by Catherine who was berating him for not giving her the night off she requested.
"You know Gil, not all of us are robots. Some of us would like to form human connections. Some of us would like to go home and cuddle more than bugs at night."
He tried not to be offended and was even set to argue with her (something he usually avoided doing) even though he knew this whole conversation was ridiculous. Catherine was still the head of the swing shift and made her own schedule (even if only for a few more weeks) and he was no longer doomed to cuddle bugs at night.
Just as he was about to say something, Catherine seemed to disappear, so he headed toward the break room passing Warrick and Nick on the way, both completely ignoring his greetings. He wondered why Nick was even there, as he should still be on leave as it had only been two days since his rescue.
When he entered the breakroom, he saw Greg sitting on the couch consoling a crying Sara. The daggers Greg was sending his way making him shudder. Gil quickly made his way over to her only to be stopped by Jim who seemed to appear out of nowhere.
"Leave her be. She doesn't need to speak to you right now. After all, weren't you the one that turned down her dinner invitation?"
Grissom was now thoroughly confused. How did Jim know about that? How did Greg seem to know? That was more than two years ago. They were in a better place now, weren't they? He turned around, shoulders slumped only to run into Hodges dressed as the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz.
"Hey bossman. Better this way you know. Guys like us we're meant to be alone. We're all work, and no heart."
Lately, I've been losing these nights
One more heartbreak and I'm done with this
Shadows on the ceiling, they don't fight
But I still argue for the hell of it
I'm trying my hardest now,
I feel you reaching out
I don't wanna be the one that's always on the edge
As Grissom started to wake from his strange dream he felt like he was being watched. His eyes fluttered open slowly only to be met by two sets of brown ones, one female, one canine.
"Morning," Sara said in a shy husky voice still ladened with sleep.
It took a moment for Grissom to recall why Sara Sidle was in his bed and then he smiled.
"How long have you been staring at me while I sleep?" He asked as he rubbed slow circles across her bare back.
"I wouldn't call it staring. I was merely admiring the view," she said with a smile, her shyness seeming to dissipate.
The sincerity in her answer made Grissom's heart swell. Trying to not show how affected he was by her innocent comment, he turned to Hank.
"And what's your excuse?" The dog's tail wagged furiously as Sara let out a giggle, pure music to Gil's ears.
"Well I think he might need to go out but I didn't want to take him for a walk without telling you first. I didn't want to just leave, you know?" The shyness returned as Sara looked down avoiding Gil's gaze as she spoke. He understood. Last night was the first night they had been intimate and he would have been more than a little heartbroken if he'd woken up and thought she'd left.
In an effort to lighten the mood he said, "Well I'll tell you a secret. Ole Hank here was hoping you'd give him his breakfast early. He likes to wake me up to eat only to promptly go back to sleep. So I think he can wait a bit. Plus I think my breakfast should come first don't you?" Gil said with a smile as he rolled himself on top of Sara making her laugh.
"I thought you weren't a breakfast person," she said with a sparkle in her eyes.
"Depends what's on the menu," he said smiling before kissing her deeply.
Neither noticed Hank slink off the bed, plopping on the floor with an exaggerated huff.
You found me all messed up
You found me down on my luck, so lost
But then I woke up in love
When I was chasing highs
You went and saved my life
You picked me up
Thank God I woke up in love
When they finally made it downstairs Hank got his breakfast while Gil made him and Sara Belgium Waffles with strawberries and whipped cream.
"Wow! Gil, these are amazing! Keep this up and I may never leave" Sara said with a laugh.
Grissom tried not to blush at her comment. Any other woman and he'd be ready to run for the hills but with Sara a pleasant warmth spread throughout his body at the thought. As she was preoccupied with her breakfast, he took a moment to study her face. She was truly the most beautiful woman he'd ever met. Everything about her radiated warmth, and love. There was no pretense with Sara, no phoniness. What you saw was what you got, a rarity in a place like Vegas. He sent up a silent prayer of thanks because he knew as Jim would say he was one lucky S.O.B.
With you
Thought I was lost, but then I woke up in love
With you
Thought I was lost, but then I woke up in love
After breakfast they decided to shower and take Hank to the park before Sara went to visit Nick in the hospital. Gil grabbed a small bag and threw in some dog toys, snacks, a few bottles of water, a blanket and a book of poetry he was currently reading.
Walking hand in hand they laughed at Hank's excitement as they neared their destination.
"Someone's sure excited to be going to the park," Sara said with a smile.
"Well this time he gets to take a pretty girl with him," Grissom said shyly.
Sara blushed at his comment as they entered the park.
Gil laid out their blanket under a nice shady tree as Sara began playing fetch with Hank.
Watching his two favorite 'people' play, Gil took time to reflect on the past few months. Things between them were forever changed after her suspension. He fully realized how much he'd failed her as a friend and knew he needed her to know that nothing she told him changed how he felt about her.
So Gil started being the friend he should have been since she moved to Vegas. They started meeting for dinner or breakfast a few times a week. They'd alternate who's place they went to and they even went out to the movies a few times.
He quickly realized why he'd fallen so hard and so fast for Sara. She was his intellectual equal and far superior to him in the ways of life and love. She was an enigma, a puzzle he wanted to spend forever trying to solve. While Gil knew that he wanted more than just friendship, he also knew it was important to rebuild that aspect of their relationship first. It wasn't until Adam Trent that he realized he couldn't wait anymore and luckily he hadn't been too late.
They'd begun dating but took things slow at his instance. Gil wanted to show her that he wasn't going to change his mind. So he was taking his time. Wooing her in ways he'd only dreamed about. Life was better than any of his dreams and he knew wherever Sara was is where he was meant to be.
Things were going well and then Nick was kidnapped. All they could think about was getting Nick back alive. Gil hadn't even thought about his own safety until after Nick's rescue. He probably wouldn't have thought much about it until Sara had confronted him. That's when it really hit him that not only was he no longer alone, he now had someone else to consider when he made potentially life altering decisions.
They were all exhausted as they watched the ambulance leave. Ecklie has been gracious enough to tell them to go home and take off the next two days as his team was going to process the scene. Sara, Grissom and Greg piled in Grissom's Denali, with Greg in the backseat. By the time they made it back to the lab Sara was still fast asleep.
"Greg, I'm going to take Sara home. I don't want her to wake up and demand to go in and try to process something. We all need sleep. I'll take her back to her car tomorrow."
"Sure thing boss… Um Griss?" Greg said hesitantly.
"Yes Greg," he replied.
"Thanks for saving Nick. I know it wasn't easy especially after the explosion but you kept it together and well I don't think I would have been able to do what you did."
"You underestimate yourself Greg. If you were in my position you wouldn't have hesitated to do what I did."
Greg blushed as he wearily got out of the car.
Grissom looked over at Sara and noticed she hadn't stirred. He made an executive decision and pointed the Denali toward his townhouse.
While they'd been dating for a few weeks they had yet to have a sleepover, more so because he insisted on wooing her as he called it. He wanted to take his time to let her know she was special and not jump her bones at the nearest opportunity. While he could tell both their patience were running thin he felt he'd made the right decision, much like he felt he was making the right one now. He himself was beyond exhausted and did not want to drive her home and then have to drive across town back to his place, he just didn't think he had the energy for it. But ultimately he didn't want to be alone. The fact that he even acknowledged that to himself showed how far he'd recently come .
He pulled into his driveway and shut off the car. Turning he saw that Sara was still sound asleep. He reached over and pushed a tendril of hair behind her left ear as remarked again at her beauty and how incredibly lucky he was.
He got out of the car and went around and opened the passenger door. He then leaned over and unbuckled her seat belt before caressing her cheek as he whispered, "Sara honey, wake up."
She started to stir and moments later her eyes fluttered open.
"Honey, we're home. You were so tired I just brought you home with me. Let's get inside so you can go back to sleep."
Sara was too dazed to object as she slowly made her way out of the car.
Grissom grabbed her a towel, a t-shirt and an extra pair of his boxers for her to change into.
"I left you some stuff to change into in the bathroom and a towel. Take all the time you need. I'll use the spare bathroom,"Grissom said, grabbing his robe from a hook on the back of his door.
Sara, too tired to protest, made her way into the master bathroom turning on the shower asshe slowly undressed.
Sara let the hot water melt away all the tension and stress that had accumulated since Nick's kidnapping. She exited the shower and was standing at Grissom's vanity toweling drying her hair when she noticed his razor on the counter. She wasn't sure why something as simple as seeing his razor triggered her breakdown but before she knew it she'd sunk down to the ground sobbing, fully realizing how close she came to losing him.
A minute later Grissom, fresh from showering, walked into the master bedroom. He noticed the door to the bathroom was closed and assumed Sara was still showering when he heard sobs coming from the other side of the door. He rushed over knocking on the door, getting no response.
"Sara, honey, I'm coming in," he said when he noticed the door was unlocked.
The site before him broke his heart. Sara was curled up on the floor leaning against his vanity in just a towel, racking sobs taking over her body.
"Sweetheart it's ok, shhh, he's fine. Nick is going to be just fine" he said as gathered her lithe form into his arms.
Sara cried harder at his words and Girssom was momentarily at a loss for what to do so kept running soothing circles across her back.
After a few minutes her sobs lessened and he heard her whisper, "but you, I ALMOST lost you!" she said breathlessly into his chest.
Her comment hit Grissom like a bolt of lightning. Grissom has spent the majority of his life alone never even considering how his actions affected those he loved because there was no love in his life. Now that Sara was in his life he realized he had someone else's feelings to consider.
"Honey, I'm ok. I'm right here Sara," he said over and over. "You can't get rid of me that easily," he said, trying to lighten the mood. Sara did manage a small chuckle as she looked at him with tear filled eyes.
"Sara I promise you, I'm not going anywhere, you're stuck with me," he said, wiping the tears from her face.
She took in a steadying breath before leaning in to kiss him, needing the reassurance that he was indeed real and she'd not lost him.
That night Gil Grissom learned what it was finally like to totally love and be loved by someone else. Intimacy, the act of seeing someone at their most vulnerable and loving them even more for it. That night Gil Grissom learned that true happiness was found in the arms of Sara Sidle.
"Okay I think he's worn me out," Sara said, breaking Gil out of his reverie as she laid down on the blanket, her head in his lap, Hank curled up by her feet.
"Well he does seem to have this boundless amount of energy," Gil chuckled.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, reveling in the peace and tranquility found when together. Grabbing his book of poetry, Gil started reading as Sara further relaxed, closing her eyes as she listened to his melodic voice.
"i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you."
Sara sighed at his words as she threaded her hand through his free one placing it over her heart.
"here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)."
Grissom felt the steady beat of Sara's heart under his hand as he closed his poetry book. He leaned against the tree at his back, a satisfying sigh escaping his lips. Gil Grissom didn't know what tomorrow would bring. The only thing he was absolutely certain of was that the love of this beautiful woman would be what got him through.
Sometimes all those dark days, well, they try to find me
But that's when I lean on you
Whatever happens, my troubles behind me
'Cause your love's gonna see me through
Nothing can bring me down, I feel you reachin' out
You're pullin' me back when I'm about to reach the edge
You went and saved my life
You picked me up
Thank God I woke up in love
With you
Thought I was lost, but then I woke up in love
With you
Thought I was lost, but then I woke up in love