Bob the Muse: So you're feeling better now?
Tenshi: Yeah, I guess so – 'rents suck though. Reviewers made me feel better.
Bob: Are you so lazy that you can't type out 'parents'?
Tenshi: Yes, yes I am.
Bob: Thought so.
Tenshi: Then why did you ask? Anyways, it's time for reviews…
Bob: I finally get to stick around for them with you?
Tenshi: Say anything Bob and I will get the duct tape.
Bob: Oh come on I – gak – nnmmpp phhaar hmmsheee…
Tenshi: I warned you.
Django X – Yes, that's it – keep the sister creature far, far away from this story – especially the next few chapters… there will be licking, arm snatching and the most vile thing of all – Barney references! Ok, so there won't be Barney references – we're not that bad – but the rest stands. Thanks for the review!
dark-raven343gs – In the future, if you review in the future, we shall simply call you Dark Raven – work for you? Works for us – numbers confuse us. It greatly disturbs us that so many people claim this is the funniest thing they have ever read… we shall have to check with the alien overlords to see if, perhaps, we have crossed a trans-dimensional line somewhere in to completely absurd funny. That is illegal in several galactic sectors. If we have – well, I blame Bob. But we are very happy that you like – just keep reading and if anything green questions you – deny, deny, deny. Oh, and a foil helmet might be a good idea too. (whispers: they can read your mind!)(Bob: I would like to take this moment to say that Tenshi is insane. Thanks for the review.)
Overactive Mind – Hiya again – whew, I missed the hordes! Thank the gods. There is more fluff in this chapter – just for you. One liners, coming up – I have a whole bunch – all a corny as the last, just got to fit them in so that it doesn't look like I'm trying. Bob says that you are a Muse's muse… so I suppose that makes your muse a Muse's muse's muse… dang – my head is all spinney now. Yep, the big round one is coming – chapt 9 – working on it – well, I should be working on it now – but I'm typing these… so will work on it after I post this chapter. Thanks for the continuing support, and ideas (laughs evilly).
Elizabeth - You should be sorry (j/k) Bob blames me for not being funny enough – he is so cruel. Thanks for the support though – especially if you were able to read it a second time – you must have a stomach of steel. We are trying to update every two days, so far, so good. Thanks again.
XxHunter the One and OnlyxX – Bob: Well, its official, you have sent someone over the edge. Tenshi: I know, and I should be ashamed, but for some reason I feel proud. Thanks for the support Hunter. We like to see people behave insanely – it makes us feel less lonely. And continue we are, well, have, we – er – I'm confused – never mind. Thanks for the support though.
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Breaking Point
By TenshiJaki
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"I like children. If they're properly cooked." - W.C. Fields
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Beastboy could do nothing but stare, open mouthed, at the pale girl in front of him. Not only was she laughing and rolling around in a huge pile of leaves but she looked, well, different. Now anyone could have said, 'duh', simply because Raven; a.) Didn't smile b.) Didn't laugh c.) Didn't frolic and d.) Did not play in a pile of leaves that she had put in Robin's room.
This wasn't why Beastboy thought she looked different though. She looked different because she actually looked happy. Raven didn't do happy. In fact, Raven didn't do anything, well emotion related anyways, with the exception of perhaps Anger and Annoyance. Yet here she was looking as though she were eight years old, playing in a pile of leaves in the yard.
Beastboy found it disturbing, and yet oddly endearing. When she looked up at him with those big purple eyes and smiled he didn't find it scary at all.
"Oh, hello Beastboy. Where did Robin go?"
"Robin? Well he was… tired. Yeah, he was tired so he went to lie down."
"Hmm, ok. Do you want to play with me?"
Beastboy almost choked on his own tongue, though I suppose it would have been weird if it had been someone else's. His mind was officially in the gutter. When she said 'play' all sorts of things ran through his mind and none of them were of the 'eight year old' variety, if you catch the meaning.
Blushing an interesting shade of puce, Beastboy shook his head rapidly. "Uh, no… I don't think that – well, er – I mean… I-I have to go." And so 'go' he did, very quickly in fact, running off to try and find the others, or a cold shower, which ever he happened across first.
Seeing Beastboy rush off Raven let out a genuine laugh. She was an empath after all. This was really turning out to be too easy. Humming to herself, something that suspiciously sounded like 'I'm a Barbie Girl', she headed off to plan her next attack, um, we mean move… because she wouldn't attack the others now would she? Yeah, ok, you caught us, she would.
(AN: Authoress would like to take this moment to say: ARE YOU HAPPY NOW BOB!
Bob: Bob would like to take this time to say: BOUT FREAKEN TIME!)
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Robin had finally come too and was holding a meeting with Cyborg and Star when Beastboy came running in, out of breath.
"We've got to get her back to normal dudes."
Cyborg just looked at him like he was something smelly that had come crawling out of the trash, "Uh, duh? What do you think we're discussing."
Robin simply continued, "Ok, something is obviously very wrong with Raven. Let's examine the facts."
The others gathered around.
"Alright, we know this started Monday right? Or did anyone notice her acting odd on Sunday?"
They all shook their heads. Cyborg spoke up, "No, but Sunday was the day BB here destroyed her room."
"Hmm, that's right, with everything that's been happening I completely forgot. Did you start on fixing it yet Cy?"
Cyborg shook his head. "Nope, haven't gotten around to it yet."
Starfire decided to join the conversation, "Perhaps this is why friend Raven is behaving so strangely? Could the absences of one's room cause such a drastic change?"
Robin shrugged his shoulders. In all honesty he couldn't think of anything that would cause a person to behave like Raven was, except perhaps a major psychological trauma, but they were only talking about a room, surely that wasn't enough to send her over the edge.
"I can't honestly believe that her behavior change is because of the accident with her room, it just doesn't make sense."
The others agreed but Cyborg did add, "I'm going to start on the repairs now though man, just in case."
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Raven meanwhile was ease dropping using the security system. She couldn't help but scowl a little at the fact that all of them had forgotten about her room. Her poor, defenseless room. At least Cyborg was going to finally get around to fixing it. She wasn't sure how much more she could take staying in the white and beige guest room. That was enough to really send her off her rocker. So much White. So much Beige. Shudder.
Looking at the security system she got another idea. This wasn't in her scheduled 'Missions' but if she was anything it was resourceful. Never one to let a good plan go to waste Raven quickly started typing things into the security grid smirking the entire time. Her room would have its vengeance.
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Raven made herself scarce the rest of the afternoon. She caught up, secretly of course, on some much needed meditation. It wasn't until dinner time that she rejoined the others. Said others had spent the afternoon cleaning out their rooms. Needless to say it took them a long time to get rid of the leaves.
They all sat down to pizza, yet again (I swear pizza is like crack to them). Dinner was going quietly, especially since no one sat in Herb's seat this time, and it appeared it would stay this way until Beastboy caught Raven licking several slices of pizza. (1)
"Uh, Raven?"
"Uh huh?"
"Are you licking the pizza!"
At this the other Titans immediately dropped their slices looking at Raven in disgust.
"Yep, just wanted to make sure no one swipes my grub."
Before the others could respond, though how do you respond to a person licking pizza, especially when said person could do -'stuff'- really, really scary 'stuff', the 'Villain Alarm' went off.
Robin once again ran to his computer, and once again it still wasn't working…they really should have listened to Harry.
"Cy, what's going on?"
Plugging in Cyborg ran through the alert, "Let's see, Location: Titan Tower… what the… Villain: The Sock Fairy!"
Robin just looked at his mostly metal friend weird, "The Sock Fairy? Uh huh… what does it really say?"
Cyborg just shook his head, "I am serious, that is what its saying."
Beastboy took this chance to interrupt, "Dudes! That explains it! That's what's been happening to all of my socks!"
"Is this Fairy of the Socks bad?"
Robin just looked at the alien and the changeling with contempt. "There is no such thing as a sock fairy.
Raven meanwhile was still licking the pizza; she already knew what was going on anyways, having given the security system its 'reports'. And this was only the beginning.
Beastboy meanwhile was showing everyone else that indeed, there was an evil Sock Fairy and said fairy was indeed stealing his socks. Rising up his pant legs he showed them his boots that he was wearing sockless. How did they know there were no socks under the boots? He removed them. The stench from his feet even caused Raven to gag a bit.
"SEE! I just bought socks yesterday and this morning, nothing. If it's not an evil sock fairy then what is it!"
Robin rubbed his temples, hoping that the headache he could feel in the distance would not get any worse. "Beastboy, there is no such thing as a sock fairy – especially an evil one, come on, how old are you? You probably just forgot where you put them. And for the love of all things sanitary, put your shoes back on!"
"But friend Robin, how do you explain the alarm?"
Robin sighed, "I don't know Star, something must be wrong with it. I'll have a look at it later." Robin then walked back over to the dinning table and flopped down on his chair. He then picked up a piece of pizza and ate it in less than five bites. The other three just looked at him as though he had lost his mind.
Starfire whispered, hoping not to irritate Raven or Robin, "Um… Robin? Does the earth term 'licking' not…"
Robin waved her off before she could finish, "Its ok Star, not like I don't know where she's been." he said motioning in Ravens direction.
Beastboy couldn't help himself, really, "Oh gods! It's contagious!"
TBC…
(1) My niece actually inspired the 'licking'. She does that with everything, she doesn't want to eat it, just lick all the flavor off it. Very disgusting, especially when you go to have a Doritos and its wet with all the cheese licked off… very, very disgusting… ewwwwwww, girl's got some damage… and not in a good way.
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Tenshi: Man, cheese whiz and everything… this chapter did not want to cooperate to save Bob's life.
Bob: Why is it my life that is at stake?
Tenshi: Muse's are story martyrs – story fails – muse goes down with the ship…
Bob: Uh huh… Riiight. So, you're having problems now aren't you? The whole 'curse of the multi-chaptered fic' thing again? I told you not to do a multi-chaptered fic – but do you listen to me?
Tenshi: No, and the readers should be very glad… your ideas are illegal in several states. Getting us banned from Arkansas Bob, shame on you.
Bob: Eh, what do those people know. Seriously though Tensh, you have got to fix this whole "start out brilliant and then nothing" thing you've got going on.
Tenshi: sigh. I know… I can't help it – damn – every time too. How many stories has this happened on now?
Bob: Far too many.
Tenshi: I blame you Bob.
Bob: WHAT!