GAH! I STILL CANT 'UPLOAD'! SOOO ANNOYING!
Special treat for everyone - two chapters at once... its because I dont like this one, but the next one I'm ok with, so I decided to give you both at the same time. Enjoy.
Tenshi: Holy sh-
Bob: Tenshi!
Tenshi: What! I was going to say sherbert! Holy sherbert!
Bob: Oh… uh - sorry.
Tenshi: Hn. As I was saying: Holy sherbert Bob! Nine chapters of unsuckiness!
Bob: Unsuckiness? What kind of word is that?
Tenshi: It's a 'Tenshi Word'.
Bob: Right, well I have a 'Bob Word' for you - crackmonkeyism… the definition is you.
Tenshi: O.o crackmonkeyism? WT-
Bob: T rating Tenshi! T rating!
Tenshi: sigh. Whatever Bob, let's just do the reviews - can you believe we got 7 in only three hours! Crazy… (Review replies at end of story - I was going to put them in normal - but I got sooo many - I literarily have like 2 or 3 pages of them alone… so go to the bottom for replies - if you're interested.)
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Breaking Point
By TenshiJaki
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"War never decides who is right, only who is left." - Unknown
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The Titans made it to the theater in record time, only having to stop once for Raven to have a quick 'potty break'. When they went inside they saw Control Freak waving his remote at the counter shouting at the poor attendants.
"What do you mean Trek Wars 15 isn't playing any more! It just came out! It is the greatest movie eve-" He stopped his rant when he noticed the Titans standing in the door way. "Ah, the Teen Titans. I have been expecting you."
Robin, Cyborg and Beastboy all rolled their eyes at the overly dramatic voice he was using while Starfire simply looked bewildered. And where was Raven? Well she was walking up to the counter. When she got there she glared at Control Freak who was standing in her way.
Instead of politely asking him to move, as though she ever would anyways, she slapped him across the face saying, "Get out of the way Tubbo, I want popcorn."
Needless to say he was shocked. The other Titans however were merely shaking their heads, Robin even going so far as to mutter, "Well, that's one way to do it."
Control Freak pulled himself up to his full height, as though this would intimidate the girl in front of him, "How dare you strike me! Do you know who I am!"
"A fat guy with a bad hair cut and a remote?" Control Freak had moved enough for Raven to get her jumbo sized popcorn and she was now munching on it watching the robust loser as though he were some kind of interesting specimen at a reptile exhibit.
"What! NO! I am Control Freak! Master of the Pop Culture Media! Lord of the Television, Ruler of the Cinema, Webmaster of the Teen Titan Fanclub Website - uh, you all didn't hear that." He said the last part to the still unmoving Titans at the door.
"Right, I still go with my original assessment. Fat guy, bad hair, remote. Nuff said."
"Why you… I shall show you my awesome powers! You shall tremble before my might! You will know - hey, cut that out!"
Raven had gotten bored with his rant when he reached 'why'. So what is any normal movie go-er to do when things get boring and they have a jumbo tub of popcorn? Why throw it of course, which was exactly what she was doing.
Her aim was impeccable, even Robin was impressed; each fluffy white missile hit their target which just happened to be the spot directly between Control Freaks eyes.
Instead of stopping when he asked Raven just continued. Of course this didn't stop Control Freak with his tirade.
"I will show you fear as you have-"
Poink
"uh, as you have never known! I will immerse you inside a wo-"
Ping, Poink
"a-a world of insa- Hey! Knock it off! Villain Rant here!"
Poink
"Where was I? Oh, right… I will-"
Poink, Choke
Apparently Ravens aim wasn't perfect after all, or was it? Instead of hitting between his eyes this time she had managed to get a piece directly into his mouth and lodged into his throat.
Choke, Gag, Cough, Heave
Beastboy said what they all were thinking, "Man, if he vomits I am sooo not cleaning it up."
With a final hack Control Freak was able to dislodge the popcorn and spit it out. "ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!"
Raven merely shrugged, "Not really, but hey, whatever works."
"Wha- you cant - I mean… you're a hero! Hero's can't kill people! I know what you're trying to do. This is some kind of nefarium, neferite, nef- uh, a plot thingy, to throw me off balance! Well, I'm on to you! You can't fool me!"(1)
The Titans all watched as Control Freak started to push buttons on his remote, using it to bring the 'promo' posters around the lobby to life. However, he really should have looked at what was playing.
There weren't any horror or Sci-Fi movies playing at the moment. All of the promos were for either comedies, romances or tear-jerking foreign films. Definitely nothing terrifying in any fashion, at least as long as none of them were staring Britney Spears. (2)
Instead of terrifying monster or lethal robots Control Freak ended up with a small army of Casanovas and crying women. And something that looked a little like Adam Sandler… Apparently there was something scary playing after all.
"Attack my minions!" Control Freak pointed to the Titans waiting for his 'soldiers' to decimate them. Instead what he got was one of the 'Romeo's' running over to Star, kissing her hand repeatedly.
"Wha- I said attack! What are you doing! Get off her! She is min- I mean, she is the enemy! The ENEMY!"
Cyborg was in a state similar to Star. That is, he was not in danger per say but really, what do you do when a heard of women converge on you weeping as though the world has ended, wailing in some language you can't place. Looking very awkward he simply tried to keep his circuits dry and gently pat the women on their backs saying things like "There there, watch the snot" or "Its ok… you small hairy woman".
Raven meanwhile was sharing her popcorn with Beastboy who decided that hey, if you can't beat them…"Who do you think is going to win?"
Raven simply shrugged, "Who cares… What is that guy doing to Robin?"
Beastboy looked over to where Raven was pointing. The Adam Sandler type guy was currently hanging off Robins back apparently trying to bite his ear. On closer inspection it wasn't biting that he was trying to do but lick…
Beastboy fought back a shudder, but just barely, "Ewww… He's licking Robin!"
Raven finally decided that enough was enough. No one but she got to lick the Titans! Besides, she was running out of popcorn.
Once again Raven found herself facing down Control Freak but this time she didn't slap him, though the urge was there. Instead she struck a pose and in her most serious voice claimed, "In the name of Love and Justice, I shall punish you!" (3)
"D-Did you just quote Sailor Moon, to me!" Control Freak was having a problem wrapping his mind around the girl in front of him. The numerous times he had faced down the Titans he had just dismissed this one as a 'bitter goth'. Now he was beginning to rethink his assessment.
He had to go with the facts. Instead of wearing her trade mark outfit she now had a pink cape with glittery writing on it, then the whole popcorn thing and now to top it off she was quoting cheesy anime taglines to him. Him! The world's biggest fan of all things that could possibly have a fan base - and some things that didn't. Who did she think she was! She obviously wasn't bitter, or gothic; she was just plan crazy.
Sneering at her he raised his remote and pointed it at all of the assembled Titans, "So, you like cartoons huh? Well let's see how you like my versions!"
With a few button presses a blue light emerged from the remote and hit each of the Titans where they stood. The power drain on the remote caused the poster army to revert back to two dimensions. With a quick sucking noise all of the Titans were pulled into the remote itself.
Due to the fact that he was laughing so hard at his 'evil plan', Control Freak never noticed when Raven grabbed him in an aura bubble, pulling him along with them. (4)
TBC… (AN: Raven wasn't really crazy this chapter… just wait… its building…)
(1) All spelling mistakes are intentional. Remember 'nemeses'? Nuff said.
(2) Lets all share a group shudder at the idea of Britney Spears as an actress - shudder… yeah, we know its wrong, but you guys love us for it.
(3) Sailor Moon did have to make an appearance… it couldn't be helped - besides, it's a great show… where else do you get magic girls, lesbian 'cousins', transvestite villains, gender-bending aliens and talking animals… uh huh, cant think of anything else can you? Hahaha - bow before the power of Sailor Moon!
(4) Before anyone says anything I really haven't the foggiest how Control Freaks remote works… I know that it can bring things to life, like posters and candy and such, and I know it can put people in 'shows' but the actual process of it, or what's required… well, lets just say that I'm taking creative licenses and leave it at that.
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Bob: You're going to leave it there?
Tenshi: Yes, yes I am… I was going to wrap it up in one chapter but… I have a plan.
Bob: Oh Muse Gods! Save me! She has a plan!
Tenshi: Sarcasm doesn't suit you Bob.
Bob: Yes it does… you're just jealous - the people like me better.
Tenshi: Uh huh… righhhht. Yep, I have a plan. I hope people know their cartoons - because I plan on having a little 'fun'…
Bob: What does that mean?
Tenshi: Find out next chapter.
Bob: Meanie.
(AN2: I wasn't completely happy with this chapter, but if you feel the same there is light at the end of the tunnel, I'm pretty happy with the next one, so bear with me. No matter how many times I tried to get this chapter 'right' it refused to come out any other way. So, sorry and thanks.)
Review Replies:
World of Nightmares - Wow again, the first one to review lol, definitely loyal, and hyper… hehe. Yep, keep sending me ideas, I'm sure I can work at least one in somewhere… looks around… my brain, she is fried! Like chicken! You're not stupid, sometimes I can't even remember my own name - forget the name of a story… and you didn't insult me, never - I don't think you could… unless you said a chapter sucked, then I would just cry… sniff. Thanks :)
Django X - wow, poor you - I never noticed that Barney was sung to Yankee Doodle - but now that you mention it… uhg… shudder. Yeah, maggots are sick… and so is Bob, I'm going to really have to watch what he is reading from now on… I have no idea where the loving and fluffy came from… sometimes my mind is sick- I have to see someone about that. And yes, yes I am insane - from time to time lol. Shakespeare! Dareth you insultith me liketh thatith! Erm - never mind lol - thanks for the review, and for the PM. Ah support, we loves it.
Teen Titans Geek - Glad to know I haven't gone to far out of the bounds of Titan reality… that would be… interesting - now there is a thought. NO! Bad Ideas! Bad Ideas! Yeah, I really don't feel the need to do a history lesson, most people that read Titan stuff know the show, and a bit about the characters - I hate having to read stuff I already know - its like 'get on with it already' lol. Glad to know Big Brother, well, Teen Titans Geek, lol, is watching.
Nightwing38 - NOOOOOO! Darn, Bob was just saying that people only read this because of him, now you're giving him a big head lol. Glad to know some people read that, though I really only do it to get the juices flowing - think of that as a visual and its sick… never mind - glad you likes, I don't mind you missing reviews - ff is being a paiiiiiiiin! I completely understand, and I feel your pain. Thanks again! (p.s. Bob wants to say 'Hi'.)
dark girl - Well, hopefully this chapter answers your question lol, and the next, and the one after that… I think it will only be three chapters with him, typing 'Control Freak' repeatedly is becoming a pain lol. Though I am having a blast with it, the next chapter really 'starts' things lol. Thanks for the support.
K.C. Raven - Uh… messy… righhhht - I blame Bob. If you do have intestinal explosions then I volunteer for him to come clean it up. Glad you like, but I'm a bit worried about permanent damage… I can honestly say you are the first person to ever 'laugh a gut up'… its - strangely - kinda flattering. Thanks :). Oh, and we try to update every two days, hope that's quick enough.
Indira of Waterdeep - Thanks… glad you likes. We try - you kinda gave us a big head… oh no, neck… won't… support…! Gah! Thud. ajfdfhjhfoahfopafhophafphafphpaf….
BrianDarksoul - The 'fan bloody tastic' part got me laughing lol. Hmm… there is an idea… you really shouldn't tell us things like that… we might have to work something like that in, especially Bob… he's a freak about that kinda stuff. Thanks for the review!
Calamol - Yeah, sorry 'bout that and this one too - but I have to move the story along, plot wise, to get to the good stuff… I think you will like the next one… all I'm saying is 'south park' is involved… and Raven hates that show… but thanks for sticking with us, even when we're not being funny… in our defense, we were having a bad day when we wrote that one - that's why we picked on Silkie - but we are better now! So look out. :)
Chantily Lace - Well, a muse is someone, or thing, who is supposed to inspire you to do whatever it is that you do… some writers use the characters they are writing about as muses, but hey, I'm traumatizing them as it is… so I had to go to the 'discount' muse store and buy one that was slightly defective… that would be Bob… yeah, I can see why no one wanted him - but be warned! They have a no refund/no return policy… evil store… But muses are good for something - they are imaginary so you can kick them around all you want and they can never go to the cops lol. Hmm… rage would say that wouldn't she… about the same time she ripped someone's head right off - ideas… evil ideas… thanks!
Overactive Mind -NOOOOOO! You will have Teen Titan Geek following me around now! He is a maggot! A maggot I say! Lol - joking… yeah, but if it looks like a maggot - I'm just hung up on the whole maggot thing… it just popped in there and it wont go away… yep - you got me on a kick - I was just going to bring CF in like I did with KM but then it grew, and grew, and grew some more - darn you! So far we're going on three chapters with him and his pimply fat butt! Not sure if I'm wrapping it up there… Bob likes concentrated - well, actually that's me, but people yell at me when I write like that - they say its hard to read… oh well - thanks :)
Elizabeth - Bob would like me to tell you he is the smarter one… not. Your sister sounds like my sister… ah, but I'm sure you've never tried to kill yours… IT WAS SELF DEFENSE MR JUDGE MAN! - whew - just in case he was reading… Yeah, I too have a strong dislike of all things pink… hmm - that just gave me an idea… I think we will have to burn the cape at some point… and its all for you - look for it in a few chapts. And enjoy :)
Shadow in the Rain - Oh no - I hate to mislead people. The human race is doomed. DOOOMED I say! Hehe, yeah, I try to be dedicated in updating, because I usually have the chapts already done, and if I don't load them then I forget and then I get lazy and then, erm… I forgot what I was talking about. So then nevermind! Thanks for the vote on the 1-liners… I'll try to work some more in.
XxHunter the One and OnlyxX - FEAR THE WET NOODLE! FEAR IT! Umm... right - well, hope this good enough for you my dear Hunter. I didn't like this chapter - but the next one is good… I think… Bob has worn down my ego - sigh. And we are always happy to see someone cry - er - laugh… right… laugh. Hehehe.
naioka1992 - Aww… sniff… favs and alerts - sooo honored. Glad you're inspired… we actually got this idea from a Gundam Wing fic and a list, so don't worry about us getting any funny ideas about you lol. Thanks for all the flattery… Bob tries to crush my ego but reviews like yours make it better. I was trying to get Raven OOC but with out actually compromising her character… does that make sense? Glad to know your enjoying - stay with us, it going to last at least, at least, another four chapters… probably more. (Why do I do this to myself?)
PoweroftheFrogs - An evil mind like Ravens? Or Mine and Bobs? 'Cause I would be willing to dissect Bob and send his brain to you… save me loads of trouble lol. Yeah, we could totally see Raven cracking and enacting a bit of revenge… thus, this fic lol. Thanks for the support! Oh, and FEAR THE FROG POWER! FEAR IT! Cough, we're better now… we just like froggies.
Dark-Anime-Gurl - Well, we dont have much to say but thanks - and thanks again :) Glad to know your enjoying, and Silkie is a nasty little worm isnt he... But its funny to see preverted insects with arm fetishes... yes, me and Bob are sick... in the head. Thanks again.
witchofdanight - Ah ha! I know who you are! You buzzed me the other night on your broom! I have your bristle tag number! lol. Thanks, and glad to know you think we have potential. This story is turning into a monster but people apparently like it soooo... enjoy.
18! We have never - NEVER - had that many reviews for one chapter, heck some of our stories dont even have that many reviews...- dang - you people are rabid! But we likes… grins.