I would like to say how much I admire all of the people who are able to update regularly. I don't have the attention span needed for that kind of accomplishment.

a.k.a.ettie: Sorry 'bout the cliffies – I'm making this story up as I go along. I mostly use them when I have no clue what I want to put in next. So whenever you see one remember I have no idea what's going to happen either:D

sesshomarusHOT: your threat of a 'whoopin 'has persuaded Edward to come back :) What website were you talking about with the drawings? confused

I love the reviews – thanks guys!

BPOV

I could have sworn that my blood froze in my veins. The blood. 'Doc' had said that vampires that had fed off of humans died in their return to mortality. I had only killed a bear, but wouldn't that have the same effect? "Good job, Bella." I barely managed to moan to myself, any movement I made was utterly draining. I had chosen this in an attempt to regain Edward's love and forgiveness. When this was over it would mean I had chosen death twice, all in order to be with him.

The fire of the change had been horrible but I had always tolerated heat better than cold. This was excruciating. It was as if someone had taken hell and tailored it just for me. The pain was made worse by my heightened senses. I could feel everything and my vampire senses made it more intense. The cold, separation from Edward, utter loneliness – it was these things I had always feared and, until now, avoided. Stabs of pain exploded on my arms, legs, and abdomen. Boils were forming on my body. I watched in horror, fighting against the screams that begged to be released from my throat. It hurt so badly! It hadn't been this painful to die! Why did it hurt so much to live again? The lethargy I had felt left my body as the boils grew larger. It seemed as though my mind, my consciousness, separated itself from my body. I still felt the burn of the cold and though it was still agonizing, it became less intense. The relief was all to short. Every time the boils brushed the ground they stung as though liquid nitrogen had been poured over the skin. I finally stood, though dizziness threatened to overtake me. The pain grew with every second; most of it was centered on the sores covering my limbs and stomach. I fell and daggers of ice shot through my body once again.

Edward. If I was truly dying I wanted my last thoughts to be of him. I wanted to be thinking of the times we had in our meadow, the way he held me at night, and how he would gently tease me, just to watch me blush. That was what I wanted to remember. Instead I thought of how angry he must be with me, to leave without telling anyone, without telling me. His eyes were likely coal black when he stepped into his car. I wanted to remember the smoldering topaz and the crooked smile I loved so much.

"Edward!" I screamed for the first time, allowing the pain and fear I felt to surface. He wasn't near, but his name still brought comfort – even in the worst of pain. I couldn't take this torture any longer. He wasn't here and I didn't want to be either. I stretched out my hand, still lying where I had fallen, and grabbed the nearest rock. The swollen areas on my body were grotesquely disturbing and they hurt. It felt as though someone had shoved handfuls of dry ice under my skin. I scraped the rock over a boil on my arm.

The icy sting doubled as blood gushed from the wound. The scent reached my nostrils quickly. That wasn't my blood!

EPOV

I heard her. A scream broke the silence as she called my name, fading just as quickly as it had come. Alice spun around quickly and stared at me. I knew I hadn't imagined it. "Where was she in your vision?"

"All I could see were dried leaves and a lot of trees. The background and location weren't clear." Her eyes widened and she looked at me worriedly. I heard her thoughts clearly. "She was covered in blood, Edward. Something's happened."

We took off once again, in the direction the scream had come from. Vampires were not easily wounded, unless by another vampire. Whoever did this to my Bella...

I almost ran into Alice as she stopped short. Her eyes glossed over and she sank to the ground. I waited until the vision was over. She played the images in her mind, simultaneously blocking me out as I waited. We didn't have time for this!

"Alice, what the..." She cut me off and showed me what she had seen. "But how in the world! You know that's not possible!" Bella was human? But she had been changed, I held her through the entire process! Alice was usually right but this was one of the few times I would have been willing to bet against her. She had clearly seen Bella – and me, at the house. I had been talking to Emmett while Bella was calmly eating pizza. Her eyes were brown with no trace of either red or topaz and her blush remained. I wanted to believe it. I wanted that so badly.

The change had been nothing like I had planned. I knew I would have to do it eventually in order for me to stay with her. I had thought it over and was going to ask her after her eighteenth birthday if this kind of life was something that she truly wanted forever. I hadn't been ready for it to happen so soon or in this way. I don't think she was either.

I ran ahead. I could have sworn I had caught her scent. It wasn't nearly as strong as it used to be, but it was there. There was something else though, something different, as though her scent was mixed with another. Bear.

BPOV

The blood wasn't mine – it belonged to the bear! The scent awoke the hunger I had shoved down while at the same time it nauseated me. The iciness lessened as the blood drained from the opening. Maybe...

I scratched at another spot and experienced the horrible sting once again. It too faded, however, and I realized the aching chills had begun to diminish as well. It was worth a try. I gritted my teeth and continued the process. My skin and clothing became soaked in blood. The smell was overpowering. I gagged and began to dry heave. It was no longer appealing or appetizing. My vision blurred as the ice cold blood in my veins began to move. My heart restarted itself in one massive lurch. I screamed again. It was far worse than when my heart had stopped. The pain increased, shooting through my chest as I tried to take a breath. I needed air. I was forced to inhale by taking short shallow breaths. My eyes watered from the pain and I didn't try to blink them back. It felt good to cry.

I tested my legs, gasping as I stood from the vertigo as well as the extra air that the effort required. Would breathing ever come easy again? I realized in looking around, all that I had given up. The world seemed black and white in comparison to the vivid color I had been able to experience before. It was as though everything was muted, sounds, sight, and touch. I stifled a sob. Had I given all that up for nothing? I had spent three days in a fiery hell only to have it taken away from me in the space of a few hours. Fear crept, surged rather, into my thoughts. Edward had left me. Rosalie would probably be happy. Where was Alice? Had she seen what was going to happen? I would die out here. I had given up eternity. I was lost in the middle of nowhere. Where had Edward gone? My breath was shaky and I tried to compensate by taking a deep breath. Bad idea. The effort – not to mention the pain – made my head swim. I began to sink into unconsciousness. As I drifted off I felt two arms around my waist. My angel.

EPOV

"Bella! Oh my god, Alice! What happened?" I caught Bella as she fell. She looked lifeless in my arms and was covered in blood. The situation was eerily similar to the incident in her bathroom not one week ago. Alice ran up behind me. She took Bella's hand in her own. "She's warm." I didn't realize what she was implying until I noticed the familiar rhythm I had been certain I would never hear again. Her heart.