Bad Behavior

Draco couldn't believe it, his best friend had gone and broken one of the cardinal rules of being someone's best friend, never sleep with, impregnate or marry your best mate's ex-girlfriend. When Blaise had finally made it out to the quidditch pitch with Draco's infant daughter Ophelia, or maybe it was Hero, anyway one of them firmly tucked in his arms and Artemis and Hermione Granger running after him shouting about the baby, Draco assumed that he was just coming over for a visit. But he received a major shock when Blaise told him why he was really there. Luckily, Artemis had enough sense to grab her daughter from his arms before her husband had the chance to spill the beans. For some reason unbeknownst to Draco, he couldn't contain his anger when Blaise informed him that he had not only gotten Pansy pregnant but that he would be marrying her as well. It took Ron and Harry several attempts to successfully pull the livid young father off of his best friend. Unfortunately for Draco, his wife witnessed the entire exchange and she was more than just a little upset over his reaction.

Artemis didn't see why her husband was so upset by Pansy and Blaise's good news. The only conclusion she could come to was that he still cared for his ex. Though Draco refuted her accusations vehemently, Artemis was just now, three and a half weeks later, beginning to warm up to him again. He had spent the last few weeks sleeping with a woman who refused to say more than two words to him at a time and who certainly had no intentions of shagging him. As per usual, it was the couple's young children that made her forget why she was angry.

"I received a letter from Excelsior today. They want Lucius to attend their program," she said, as she readied herself for bed. "They're the best Magical Starter School in the wizarding world and I think we should let him attend. You know how advanced he is for his age and it's only for a few hours everyday."

"Maybe we should ask Luce what he wants. If he doesn't want to go I don't want to make him," replied Draco, walking over to his wife and wrapping his arms around her waist just as she was finishing tying up her long hair. He missed this, just being able to touch her. He didn't know how his father managed to survive so many years in an affectionless marriage when he had barely been able to make it through a few weeks.

"He found the letter they sent and he seemed really excited about it," Artemis informed, turning around so that she faced him and wrapping her arms around his neck. "I'm pretty sure he wants to go and I think it'll be good for him. The only people he hangs around aside from you and me are Severus, Lucius, Blaise and Goyle. I don't think I need to point out just how bad that is. None of them are the prime candidates for teaching our son how to interact with others properly."

"You've got that right," he agreed. "We'll check the school out tomorrow."

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Artemis and Draco loved the program that Excelsior had to offer. It would allow Little Luce to not only learn the basics of magic before entering Hogwarts but it would also teach him how to handle social situations and how to interact with his peers. When they had told their son that he would be starting school soon Lucius had been thrilled. In the two months leading up to his starting the program all he could do was talk about how smart he was going to be. He had flat out told his father that after two weeks at Excelsior he would be even smarter than him. Naturally, this caused a battle of wits between the father and young son, one that Draco had to bow out of due to the glares his wife was shooting at him.

For some reason Draco had taken to arguing with Lucius whenever they had the chance. It was really quite funny to watch, as Lucius had a real knack for confusing his father into submission. But sometimes Draco forgot that he was arguing with his son, not his mate's and he would let slip some less than tasteful language. Unfortunately, Lucius was at that stage in his life where he repeated just about everything he heard. Narcissa had nearly had a heart attach when she greeted her young grandson and he called her a 'sniveling fuck monkey'. The minute the words left the boys mouth Artemis knew that Draco was responsible for the colorful language, as he had a habit of throwing words together that made absolutely no sense and ensuring that it sounded derogatory.

After his first day at Excelsior, Artemis was shocked to hear her son proclaiming that he hated school and that he never wanted to go back. According to the young boy, everyone at the program was stupid and they should be shot execution style. Artemis knew that this statement was coined by none other than Severus Snape, as she had heard him say it in regards to his Potions classes many... many times. At first Artemis didn't think much of her son's dislike of the school he was attending but when she received a letter from his instructor she knew that it was a big deal.

"Draco, Luce's teacher wants us to meet with her tomorrow to discuss his behavior," Artemis said, frantically. She was a real stickler about behaving properly in class and she had hoped that her son hadn't done anything too terrible, but with half of his genes coming from Draco she knew that chances were it was pretty awful.

"The first of many," laughed Draco, as he went back to reading the Daily Prophet.

"What do you mean, 'the first of many'?" asked Artemis.

"Do you have any idea how many conferences we're going to have to sit through because of Luce's behavior?" muttered Draco, turning to the gossip section of the paper. "He is my son after all, not mention all the time he spends with Severus. I'd bet my right testicle that he said something awful to the teacher. Oh, hey look, there's a great picture of you at the fashion show in the Prophet." Draco tried to point the photo out to his wife but she ignored him. Artemis knew her husband was right. Lucius was a very smart little boy and he could be very polite and well mannered when he wanted to be, but when he didn't care he was a wicked little tike.

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"Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy we've asked you here today to discuss your son's behavior as it has become rather problematic," droned the haggard looking witch, Misses Britchford.

"What's he done?" asked Artemis, her concern evident by the frantic tone in her voice.

"Well, he's mean to the other students and to the staff. He makes derogatory comments during lessons and it's making it very difficult for us to teach not only him but the other students."

"What exactly do you mean by derogatory comments," Draco asked, skeptically.

"For example, the second day of school we were working on the alphabet and every time I would say a letter your son would interject with a word that began with that letter," she explained.

"I fail to see how that's derogatory," snapped Draco, not liking the accusations being made. "If anything, Luce was being helpful not rude."

"When I said A, he said 'A is for asshole," she clarified. "When I said C, he said 'C is for Crack whore. Which by the way, is two words not one. When I said H, he said 'H is for Harry Potter is a pathetic attention seeking imbecile who couldn't make a decent Potion if his life depended on it." Draco, who was already struggling to contain his laughter, lost it when Misses Britchford mentioned his son's example of the letter H. Artemis also laughed when she brought this up as well. She didn't doubt that her son's language may have something to do with Severus, just as much as her husband.

"There's more..." interjected the instructor, annoyed by the parent's being entertained by their son's bad behavior. "I asked a young lady in the class to tell me how Potions could be useful in her everyday life and do you know what your son did?"

"What?" asked Artemis and Draco in unison both slowly recovering from their fit of the giggles.

"The poor dear didn't really know the answer so she didn't say anything and your son said 'don't worry, what she lacks in intelligence she more than makes up for in stupidity.'" Draco lost it. He couldn't hold back his laughter any longer. It was like Severus Snape had somehow inserted his brain into the young boys head.

"I'm terribly sorry, Misses Britchford," replied Artemis, genuinely apologetic for her son's outbursts. "We'll have a talk with him as soon as we get home."

"The last straw came two days ago," interjected the agitated instructor, ignoring what the young mother had just said to her. "Your son began referring to me as Misses Bitchford. He did this all day long and just before school let out I spoke to him about it and he said that 'perhaps my lack of a sense of humor was the reason for my being single and that he knew it couldn't be because I was a fat old hag seeing as how there's got to be at least one wizard in the world who's desperate enough to marry an unattractive witch, but if her personality is lacking than she has absolutely no hope.' He thinks I ought to work on that," spat the instructor, glaring at the stunned parents.

"I see what he means," replied Draco, returning the nastiness that the witch was displaying. He didn't like the tone she had taken with them one bit and if she thought that he would just sit there and take it she had another thing coming.

"I don't think that Excelsior is the right place for your son. We wish for him not to return," Miss Britchford ground out, closing the file folder that contained Lucius' records and placing them in the filing cabinet.

"Well, we wish for you to go fuck yourself," replied Draco, a false smile on his face as he stood. "Come, love."

"Sorry again," shouted Artemis, as she and Draco cleared the doorway of the classroom. Once out of earshot Artemis addressed her husband. "Real mature, Draco. You can't tell your son's teachers to go fuck themselves."

"Yes I can and I just did," he laughed, as he opened the passenger side door of his car for his wife. "I think Luce will be thrilled that he doesn't have to go back to that place. Maybe we should look into having private tutors for the children until it's time for Hogwarts."

"Yes, I think that would be the best route," muttered Artemis, still rather embarrassed by her son's, and now her husband's, behavior. "When we get home you've got to talk to Luce about his language and the way he relates to people. He's going on four not forty he hasn't got any business saying half of the things he does."

"Alright," moped Draco, not liking the idea of having to revert to authoritarian mode. It never went well. Luce was always really good at justifying his actions and most of the time after speaking to the boy, Draco couldn't bring himself to punish him. Before they had ever started their family, Artemis and Draco agreed not to spank their children, instead they would take away their toys and privileges. The problem with doing this with Lucius was that his favorite toy was his imagination and there wasn't anyway for them to take that from him. "I think we should threaten to keep him away from Severus."

"Yes, but only as a last resort. They adore each other, though neither will admit it," she requested.

"Deal," he agreed, smiling over at his lovely wife. "Could this be any better?"

"What?"

"This... us, we've got a wonderful marriage, great kids... most of the time, our dream jobs and sex whenever we want it. I just don't think life could be any better," he rambled, reaching out his right hand and lifting up her left so that he could kiss it gently.

"Draco Malfoy when did you become such a romantic?" asked Artemis, gazing over at her husband who's eyes were glued to the road.

"When I realized how lucky I had it... I don't still have feelings for Pansy," he blurted out, relieved to finally have a chance to talk about how he reacted when he found out about Blaise and Pansy. Artemis had gone back to treating him like usual but the pair had never actually talked things through. "I was pissed at Blaise for going behind my back. You just don't mess around with your friends ex. It makes things complicated and that's not a smart thing to do. I'm glad that he's actually found someone to settle down with. I'm really glad that he's gotten over being angry about it and that's he's happy with her but when he told me about it, I just snapped. I felt betrayed."

"I know you don't really care for her. I just don't recall your ever fighting over me," muttered Artemis, her bottom lip stuck out playfully.

"Do you not remember our sixth year at Hogwarts and a certain Ravenclaw named Daegus. We may not have slugged it out but I busted my ass for you and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Now if you want blood, just point to some bloke and I'll go for it," he assured her.

"That won't be necessary," she muttered, "I'll settle for being shagged senseless."

"Are you serious?" he asked, his foot slipping off of the gas pedal in surprise. Artemis never initiated sex. That was his job.

"Do I look like I'm joking?" she laughed, as he righted his foot on the pedal and the car began to accelerate again.

"Oh shit, I've got to get back to work," he whined.

"Since when did that ever stop us?" Artemis laughed, noticing how much faster the car started going. "You've got a lovely antique desk that we haven't used in years."

"Can I just say I've never wanted you more than I do right now," he declared. Artemis just laughed, knowing full well that he wasn't being honest. She was positive that the moment he wanted her the most was just after she gave birth to the girls. He hadn't been able to keep his hands to himself even though she had just endured such a painful ordeal. At this moment, she was sure that he was right about what he said earlier, things couldn't be better."

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AWW, LISTEN TO DRACO BEING ALL ROMANTIC. I KNOW THAT LUCE'S BEHAVIOR ISN'T TYPICAL OF A THREE YEAR OLD BUT I LIKE HIS WICKEDNESS, BESIDES HE REMINDS ME OF A TINY SNAPE AND I IMAGINE SNAPE AS A THREE YEAR OLD WAS NO MORE POLITE THAN HE IS NOW. SO IF LUCE'S PERSONALITY SEEMS UNREALISTIC, THAT'S WHY. WHEN I WAS CALCULATING THEIR AGES FOR THE LAST CHAPTER AND THIS CHAPTER, I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR SEVEN YEARS ALREADY. THAT'S WHY I KEEP HAVING DRACO AND ARTEMIS COMMENT ON HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT WHERE THEY'RE AT IN THEIR LIVES.

AS ALWAYS, YOUR REVIEWS ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED AND ALWAYS HELPFUL.

FYI: BIABE ASKED ABOUT MY FRIEND AND HER BABY AND I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THAT SHE HAS DECIDED TO PUT THE BABY UP FOR ADOPTION. SHE'S ALREADY FOUND A HUSBAND AND WIFE WHO CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN OF THEIR OWN AND THEY'RE REALLY NICE. I'VE MET THEM AS WELL AND I THINK ASHTON (THAT'S THE BABY'S NAME) WILL HAVE A WONDERFUL LIFE WITH THEM. KUDOS TO HER FOR MAKING SUCH A HARD DECISION BUT I'M SURE IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST.

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