A little bit special: Chapter Thirty-four:
Batman & Robin
"God, being bored is certainly ugly!" Hermione smiled, and then laughed.
"Shut up, you're just mad that I came up with this hot ass look and you didn't. So don't be jelly!" Draco said, Hermione and Knickers bursted out laughing, "Well, now I feel stupid." Draco said.
"Oh trust me cumslut you should." Hermione said, her face was beet red, and her head now rested on the table. "Please God, let me stop." She said, she then looked up at Draco and a fresh wave of laughs over took her.
"I feel so loved." Draco pouted, Knickers put a comforting arm around him, and said that it was okay.
"Not everyone is going to love such a wonderful and creative bi-sexual wizard. It's the hard facts of life." He said releasing Draco from his grasp.
"Well, that didn't give me the warm comforting feeling I think you were going for." Draco said. "Well, it did grab the attention of my Winkle, Mr. James Pickles." He said.
"You named it Mr. James Pickles?" Hermione asked.
"Yeah, a long time ago, sometimes when I masturbate I'll talk to him, it's fun..." His voice trailed off.
"Well, it sounds just so damn fascinating." Hermione jested.
"Well, I hate to end this little love fest, but I have to be going back home, Thongs will work himself in a tizzy if I stay out too long. She's got my Vagina in an iron grip." He said walking off after Draco let him up.
"That man get weirder every time I see him. And I've only seen him twice." Draco noted. He looked back at Hermione and smiled. "So how ya been?" He asked.
"Pretty good." She said in a nonchalant tone. "Bit lonely you could say." She smiled.
"Ahh, I know the feeling, I'm surrounded by people, yet I feel so incomplete." Draco stopped and looked like he was going to start singing.
"Please no Backstreet Boys." Hermione said covering his mouth with her hand.
"Sorry." He said before she removed her hand.
"I mean unless you do it naked." She raised a brow and looked at him, like she was waiting for him to get up a whip his clothes off. He laughed and said that his naked singing days were over, Hermione pouted, Draco laughed. "God, I just wanted you out of those clothes." Hermione said. "Joan Rivers would have a fit and be in a coma for months."
"Oh thanks." Draco said.
"Well, damn I wish you would have come and seen me before you went out in that, I could have saved you a lot of grief." Hermione smiled. Draco gave her the finger. "Oh I've got two of them too."
"I miss you." Draco blurted out, those words caused a silence to fall upon the table.
"I miss you too. A lot in fact, I miss everything about you!" Hermione stated. "But I can't-" Draco cut her off.
"I know you can't live with me, and my habit of fucking boys...I understand, but understanding doesn't make the hurt go away!"
"Okay, if you want to shag boys, be my guest do it until you're the fucking Gay pride flag! But just don't do it with friends, our friends, I mean come on, their are loads of fit boys here, and you had to go after him...come on." Hermione forced out, without stopping. "That hurt seeing you with Blaise. It really did, and I thought that since you knew that I was aware of that you wouldn't do it, but you did, and that hurts me."
"I know it did, and does, trust me I know and I have been sorry every day. I never thought I would lose you because I was a big man whore, it wasn't my intention, it wasn't part of my plan, hurting you was never part of it, I just thought with Mr. James Pickles." Hermione laughed.
"You know, using that lump three feet above your ass helps, more than you'll ever know, or even comprehend." Hermione smiled and laughed.
"Yeah, I know." Draco agreed, before he really understood what she said. This made Hermione laugh even harder.
"God, you would be absolute shit without me."
"I know, just fucking look at me." Draco said. "I am, and have been total shit, and fucking lost without you." Hermione laughed and patted him on the head.
"Well at least you're an honest boy!" She said talking to him like he was a kid. "Most of the time."
"Hey you never asked me if I was still boning him, so there fore it's not lying." Draco told her while pointing a finger at her.
"True, but you think if you loved me half as much as you claim than you would have told me, we never kept secrets before, so why would you start with that one? One, that at the end of the damn day doesn't matter, I would have rather you chosen some one else, but butt fucking happens and there's really nothing we can do about it. I mean I knew about two times, and I know you knew, so why didn't you just continue to tell me?" Hermione asked. "It wouldn't have made me love you any less, but I would have encouraged you to do it with someone else."
"I know that, but I didn't want to hurt you."
"No if you didn't want to hurt me, then you wouldn't have kept it a secret, go ahead give away sex, it doesn't run out, but as long as I have your love at the end of the day, that is all that matters to me. You could shave your head and wear a fucking tutu and I would still love you, you could do some pretty rotten, disgusting, degrading things, but as long as you don't do them to me, my love doesn't change for you. It seems that yours did." Hermione let out, Draco just stayed silent and waited for her to stop talking.
"I know, but we can't change the fact that it happened, it did, no matter how much we dwell on it...it's not going to change, we're never going to forget, but we can forgive, and that's all I want. It hurts me knowing that I caused you an ounce of unhappiness." He smiled grabbing her hand and giving it a squeeze.
"Why do you always have to make things hard on me?" Hermione asked.
"I don't know, it's just who I am, and you love it and you fucking know it with every fiber of your being." Draco said, his attention was grown upwards. "Hey." He said to the boy that was sitting on the wooden seat divider. "What are you doing?"
"Climbing towards heaven." He said in an enthusiastic manor. "I have to get there." He was also fat and out of breath, so it was quite funny to Draco, it wasn't to Hermione, she got kicked in the head.
"Heaven can fucking wait, get the hell down." Hermione laughed.
"It can't wait. I must go, I must. God, needs me to do his work." He said.
"What does he need you to do?" Draco asked, Hermione looked at the kid curiously.
"A blow job, God needs one and he called me forth to preform this challenging task." He said, he was practically scaling the ceiling, Hermione got up after being kicked in the head again. She walked up to Madam Rosemerta and paid her the money for the drinks, she whistled at Draco. He looked up, saw her and got up joining her at the door.
"Draco, there you are." Blaise said running up to him, he was wearing short shorts, accented with multi colored tights, green converse and a cut off tee, while enjoying a chocolate dick. "Dick?" He offered.
"No thanks." Hermione said.
"Yeah, I'm cool." He said.
"Okay more for me." Blaise said.
"So where's Harry, and Crabbe and Goyle?" Draco asked.
"Oh they're coming." He said, Hermione looked over the shoulder that Blaise had pointed over. She could see Harry walk out of the sweet shop, he was dressed as Ozzy Osbourne, Crabbe and Goyle walked out chewing on a pair of white chocolate breasts, they were dressed like Batman and Robin. Hermione covered her mouth and tried to hide her laughter.
"This is too much for me." Hermione said between her barrel of laughs.
A/N: Hope you liked that, I did. Note: If there are any mistakes fix them yourself!