A/N: Hey everyone! Here I am, back with another speedy update. A big thank you goes out to my readers and reviewers, as usual. Right now, I'm putting the finishing touches on the last chapter of this story, and I'm pleased to report it will all be posted within a week and will total nine chapters.

Warnings: Oh my, there's fluff in this chapter!

Disclaimer: I own a few things, but Harry Potter is definitely not one of them...

Enjoy!

Planning, Plotting, and Pranking -- Chapter Seven
POV – James

With the end of the week in sight, I could swear that the sky was slowly getting sunnier.

And I was getting more nervous. Peter and I still hadn't covered the details of our Mother of All Pranks nearly as thoroughly as we should have, and the fact was – we only had a few days left. Less than a few days. Peter had come up with the idea of "sticking" all of the classroom doors shut. Though there'd be no classes on a Sunday, it was still a pretty good idea and would be prove to be a royal pain in the arse for the teachers. As a way of getting back at Snape for what he'd done to Remus and Sirius, I'd devised an ingenious (in my humble opinion) plan to make Snivelly's Sunday a living hell.

It was Friday afternoon – the time of day in November when the sun's already starting to set – and the Marauders had a block of free time before dinner. To Peter and I, it was a godsend, and we hurried off toward the library with the full intention of getting some work done on our Mother of All Pranks.

" – like a pile of dung wherever he steps? Oh, that's a good one, Prongs!"

"Of course it is," I said, placing a hand on my chest, "for it was I who came up with it." We ceased our talking as a group of Slytherin second-years walked by, and in turn they gave us horrible glares and sneers. "Speaking of which, Wormy, we've got to think up something especially nice for the dungeon-dwellers."

"They've got a Quidditch practice early Sunday morning, don't they?" the shorter boy asked. "We could do something to the pitch, I suppose – or, even better – we could do something to their brooms!"

"Excellent idea!" I beamed and shook Peter's pudgy hand. "I guess we could start working on that prank tomorrow evening – you know, put on the Cloak and get a hold of their slimy brooms…"

"Make 'em set to crash into the ground at random intervals," Peter said. "Do the odd loop-the-loop every so often."

Peter's talent at coming up with obvious, yet hilarious pranks reminded me why he was a part of the Marauders in the first place. "Good, good – and what about the rest of the Slytherin lot? I suppose we might as well let something loose in their dormitories. Do a bunch of rogue lawn gnomes sound good to you?"

"We'd have to make sure they're rather… demented, first – or else all they'll do is sit there and grumble." Peter scratched his mousy hair for a moment, then added, "Although, having a disgruntled lawn gnome hexed into sitting on Snape's shoulder all day doesn't seem like such a bad idea, either."

"In fact, it's a good idea!" I agreed. "Now, what about the teachers? They haven't suffered a full-blown prank ever since Sirius got in trouble for making McGonagall's hair turn into a mess of piss-yellow snakes…"

"That boy always has been good at hair-related pranks…"

"Wormtail, I think a nice, harmless joke on the teachers is long overdue."

--

POV – Sirius

Ah, two hours of wonderful, wonderful free time before dinner – and what does Moony spend this sacred time doing? Reading, of course, the dorky prat. Stretched out across the sofa in the common room, with Remus sitting nearby in a large, upholstered chair holding a book in front of his face, I picked up a crumpled piece of parchment and quietly transfigured it into a toad. Well, a two-headed toad. But I hadn't meant to do that. Before the deformed amphibian had a chance to ribbit, I chucked it at Remus, and the thing hit him squarely in the forehead.

Looking over his book, the werewolf shot a venomous glance my way – though, really, I could see the appreciation shine in his amber eyes. "Sirius, when I finish this chapter, I am going to kill you."

"I'm looking forward to that," I said with a grin, and this only elicited a showing of the Middle Finger from Remus. Chuckling, I thought ahead to Sunday – I'd come up with an excellent prank on Snivellus, a small hex that would teach him a thing or two – and also wash his hair in the process. I glanced over to Remus again, the book still obscuring his face. I've got to prank Moony, too, I decided with an evil smile. Just for the buggering hell of it. His love of books was plainly unnatural, and this gave me just the perfect idea. When you see the library on Sunday, Moony, you are going to freak.

"I wish I could read thoughts, right about now," Remus grumbled from behind his textbook. "Because the lack of spoken drivel from you obviously indicates to me that you are plotting something unpleasant."

"Damn right I am!" I declared with a proud smile. "Oh, Merlin, the day after tomorrow will go down in the annals of Hogwarts history!"

"Annals?" Remus had lowered his book slightly and was giving me a very lewd sneer.

"Yes, Moony, annals. And don't give me that look, mister! That's your own skewed mind at work!"

"Ah, yes. I'm sure." Remus was still smirking when he picked up his book once more.

But I wasn't about to let him get away that easily. Quietly, I lifted myself from the couch and took a flying leap toward the other boy. In midair, I transformed into a dog, and before Remus had time to react, I landed on him, nearly knocking his chair onto its back. Almost instantly, I changed back into my normal self, straddling the amused form of the werewolf. "Hi, Moony," I said with a grin.

"Hi, Padfoot," he grumbled, a smile finally breaking through his forced frown. "You wanted to tell me something?"

"Yes!" I said, still grinning broadly. "Very much so!" And, without further hesitation, I leaned forward to kiss him.

--

That evening, none of the Marauders opted to go to dinner in the Great Hall; instead, surprisingly enough, Lily made a trip to the kitchen, in the hopes of begging some food off the House Elves. Meanwhile, James and Peter snuck into Hogsmeade to pinch several bottles of Butterbeer and Firewhiskey from The Three Broomsticks. This gave Remus and me time to snog and add some details to our Grand Master Plan – at the same time. Remus was sitting on the couch, and I had my head resting on his lap, when my eyes alighted with an idea. "My motorcycle!" I said quite suddenly, taking the other boy by surprise.

"Oh, dear," Remus drawled, absently running a hand through my hair. "What are you planning on doing with that monstrosity?"

Looking up, my gaze met his, and I smirked. "Well, riding it, of course, you dumbarse."

Remus rolled his eyes. "And won't Dumbledore be absolutely thrilled when he sees you riding a flying motorcycle through the school."

"Somehow, I think he would be," I said. "And, besides – it wouldn't be just me. It'd be you, too."

"Oh, no. You have got to be kidding me," Remus grumbled. "Me, riding that infernal thing? Pssshhht. Yeah, right."

"Aww, is ickle Moony-kins afwaid of a wittle motorcycle wide?" This earned me a flick in the forehead from Remus, and I laughed. "You'll have fun, mate. I promise. Just think – whilst wreaking havoc upon this noble school, we'll be zooming through the halls and over the grounds, to see all the chaos we've caused! It'll be perfect!"

"Uh-huh, whatever you say, Padfoot." He leaned down to kiss me, and it blew my mind to think that before today – or the night before – I would have shied away from something that felt so natural.

Unfortunately for us, at that moment, Lily, James, and Peter all walked through the portrait hole and into the room, their arms laden with food and drink. "Whoa, PDA!" James shouted sarcastically before he and Peter slammed down a dozen or so bottles of Butterbeer and Firewhiskey on a nearby table. "I'm glad you two have been so productive while we've been away. Sweet Merlin, knowing Sirius, I expected there to be flesh showing!"

Remus laughed, then grumbled, "Get the bugger up, Sirius – I think I could go for a bottle of Ogdens Old Firewhiskey right about now."

What, Remus voluntarily drinking alcohol? And Lily, letting us do whatever the hell we wanted? In my bewilderment, I had forgotten about the werewolf's request, and a second later, I found myself being pushed off the couch and hitting the floor rather painfully. Thank you, Moony.

--

Friday evening was a night for food fights (charmed, of course, with magic), drunken singing, and sloppy, alcohol-induced kisses. When the rest of the younger Gryffindors came back from dinner, the party had just begun, and with the newcomers, things only got better. The revelry lasted late into the night, and thanks to Lily, who had kindly put a silencing spell on the door, no teachers – or a certain disgruntled janitor – intervened.

--

POV – Remus

Bright sunlight streamed in from the window and hit my shut eyelids, turning a world of black into a blazing blood-red. My first thought that morning was huh? and it was then that I was stupid enough to open my eyes. The jarring light blinded me and suddenly made me well aware of the horrendous headache that was pounding inside my cranium. What the bugger…? Squinting, for my vision was still blurred, I surveyed my surroundings. I was draped over the sofa in the Gryffindor common room, where empty alcohol bottles were strewn carelessly about and other members of the Gryffindor House were lying on the floor or in chairs, in various states of Firewhiskey-related unconsciousness. Grunting a swear word, I moved to get off of the couch – then realized there was a rather heavy weight on top of me.

Sirius was out-cold and shirtless, his long hair mussed up, with an appealing trickle of drool dribbling from the side of his mouth. If I hadn't been so hungover, I would have laughed out loud – for this surely was not Sirius at his finest. Taking special care not to wake the boy, I managed to pry myself out from underneath him and stumbled to my feet. I was less than happy to find that I, too, was missing my shirt – but only because my scars were visible to the world, and I didn't particularly want anyone else to find out that I was a werewolf. Staggering about the common room for another minute or so, I finally located my (Firewhiskey-soaked) shirt and pulled it over my head, then brought myself to the window. For the first time in what felt like weeks, it was actually brilliantly sunny outside. The sky was an unmistakable blue, fringed with wispy little clouds, and a fine dusting of frost coated the brown grass.

I sighed and wished I could remember what had happened the night before. Truth was, I couldn't recall a thing – only that Lily had brought the food and James had brought the alcohol… Remus, you never could hold your liquor. Which was really too bad, because I was dying to know what it felt like to be beneath a drunken Sirius. As if to challenge that thought, the image of the unconscious, drooling boy suddenly appeared in my head, and I smiled somewhat. Or maybe not…

"Nice morning, isn't it?" Sirius' calm voice nearly scared me to death. And damn it to hell if he didn't have a hangover.

"Yes, it is," I said, not turning around to face him. "For a change."

"Bad hangover, huh?" Sirius asked, walking up behind me and circling his arms around my waist. I shuddered under his contact – and I didn't try to convince myself it was because the room was so cold.

"You are correct," I said with a sigh. "And you? Feeling fine, as usual, I suppose?" I chuckled, my head still blazing with pain.

"Unfortunately for you, yes," Sirius said, and leaned forward to ghost his lips against my neck. "There certainly are a lot of passed-out people in here, aren't there?"

"Yes, even James is still unconscious… He must have had a lot to drink."

"Much to Lily's displeasure, yes," Sirius snickered. "Hell, even she had a drink or two before going off to bed. Prongs got just a little bit too plastered for her tastes, I think."

"You remember much of what happened?" I asked, my eyes still focused on the beautiful morning outside.

"I do," Sirius said, obviously smiling. "You got pretty shitfaced, Moony."

"That's what my headache's telling me."

"You don't remember anything?"

I shook my head, leaning into the contact of Sirius' strong arms. "Never do. It's a lot like the full moon, you know – I can barely ever remember anything from our monthly escapades."

"You care for an abbreviated demonstration, then?" Sirius asked. "Before everyone's too awake?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"I thought you might." Sirius moved his hands up and under my shirt, his fingers slowly caressing the raised skin of the scars on my waist and stomach and chest. I moaned softly when his touch reached my nipples, massaging them slightly, and then he turned me around to face him. "Two… three days ago," Sirius said, his eyes meeting mine, "I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but…" He broke off and instantly our lips locked in what was at first a chaste, innocent kiss. But Sirius deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring my mouth, one hand lifting my shirt so that our warm skin would touch, and the other moving lower down my back.

I returned the kiss, realizing how wonderful it was to have the boy of my dreams in my arms, to have him kissing me soberly. The pounding headache of my hangover and the stinging of my eyes seemed to fade away, and as I melted into his embrace, I knew that Sirius was the cure for all things bad: for the lovesick, for the depressed, for the one in need of a good laugh. I pulled away, inhaling slowly, and murmured, "I know, Sirius… I love you, too."

He smiled and brushed the long bangs from my eyes. "There you go, Moony – reading buggering minds again."

"Don't be stupid," I said, and placed a kiss on Sirius' cheek. "Truth is – truth is, I've fancied you for a long time."

The other boy blushed. "I'm almost afraid to ask – but, since when?"

"Maybe six weeks into our first year."

"Six weeks, Moony? Did it really take that long?" Sirius laughed, and kissed me again. "I feel pretty stupid for lying to myself for six years."

"Better late than never," I said, and tucked a long, dark strand of Sirius' hair behind his ear. I smiled mischievously and added, in a thick, scandalous whisper, "You were drooling on me this morning."

"Was I really?" Sirius asked, looking both delighted and embarrassed at the same time.

"Yup. I wish I had a camera."

"And you'd post the pictures all over the school tomorrow, no doubt?" Sirius smirked, brought me into a headlock, and ruffled up my hair so that I imagined it looked even worse than his.

"I'd send them to the Daily Prophet, more likely," I said, flicking Sirius' nose. "For your soul to be forever immortalized – as a drooling, unconscious alcoholic with mussed-up hair." I put an arm around the other boy's waist, and together, we watched the sun rise higher into the clear sky, burning away the frost that blanketed the ground.

--

POV – James

It was nearly noon by the time I was fully awake. Damn Firewhiskey… I swear it was more potent this time around… The worst of my hangover seemed to have passed, and while I waited for Peter to wake up, I took it upon myself to start cleaning the common room. Might as well earn myself some points back with Evans. I trashed the empty alcohol bottles and scraps of food left over from the party, all the while surveying the room, curious to see who was still out cold. A couple sixth- and fifth-years were lying unconscious next to the fireplace, but they were breathing, and that was good enough for me. I was sure that there were plenty of others who had retreated to their dormitories to sleep it off – though where Remus and Sirius had gone to, I wasn't certain. They had been snogging all over the sofa before I'd blacked out, though it looked as if they'd already woken and gone off somewhere else to snog.

Whatever, it really didn't matter. As long as they were happy. And to think they've only been together for a day or two – practically getting more action than I have with Lily! I allowed myself to chuckle, though, really, I wasn't jealous. Sirius was famous for moving his relationships along quickly, whereas Lily liked to take things at a slower pace. Doesn't matter. She's my dream girl, and she's who I'll marry.

It pleased me to see that it was finally sunny outside, and the good weather raised my spirits greatly. Today is a good day for putting the finishing touches on those pranks – and tonight, we'll do something about those Slytherin broomsticks…

--

Peter and I arrived at the Great Hall a half-hour late for lunch, but on a Saturday, it really didn't matter. Half the Gryffindor table was absent or hungover, but Sirius and Remus were in good spirits, as was Lily. "I hear that you cleaned up the common room, James," she said, a bit of a surprised smirk on her face. "If the rumors are true, then it'll make up for your shitfaced antics last night."

I rolled my eyes, trying not to laugh with all the food in my mouth. "Thanks a lot, Evans." I took a swig of pumpkin juice, and shot a glance to Sirius and Remus, both of whom seemed enamored with the other and oblivious to the outside world. "Earth to the puppies," I said, and finally threw a carrot stick at Sirius.

"Bugger!"

"Same to you, Padfoot. Look, it's a nice day out there – temperature could actually be tolerable." I shrugged, and asked, "You have anything planned for today? 'Cause Wormtail and I were gonna go outside, you know – survey the grounds, get in some sort of trouble. Whatever."

Sirius glanced across the table to Remus, who nodded. "Sounds like a good idea," the werewolf said. He looked up at the ceiling of the Great Hall – it portrayed a crisp, blue sky – and seemed to study it, almost for too long. "Don't have anything else to do."

"Sure you don't," I laughed, and ignored the rude gesture that Sirius directed my way. "Beech tree, then, at one-thirty, if you'd like."

"Oh, I'd love it," Sirius drawled.

--

It was absolutely beautiful outside. Not that it wasn't cold – it was freezing – but I had convinced Lily to come with us and I figured that she could keep me warm. Sirius would have Remus, and Peter would have – well, no one. Poor Peter. On the way outside, I told him he could always have the Giant Squid, and that had made him laugh somewhat nervously and say, "I'd rather die first."

When Lily and Peter and I finally made it outside, we were less than surprised to see Sirius and Remus in one another's arms, sitting on the cold, semi-frozen ground beneath the beech tree.

"You two having fun?" Peter grumbled, rolling his eyes as he sat down.

"It's not my fault Moony's so susceptible to the cold!" Sirius said, and planted another kiss on Remus' lips. "And, to answer your question, Wormtail – yes."

I took a seat next to Lily, and, resting my head on her shoulder, all I could think about was Sunday and how bloody amazing it would be. "So what're you doing tomorrow, Evans?" I asked lazily, all the while smirking and making rude faces at Remus and Sirius.

The question, as casual as it was, seemed to take Lily by surprise, and she blinked. "Oh – oh, I don't know. Going to the library, I suppose – staying out of trouble." With the way she had emphasized that last statement, I couldn't help but wonder if she was catching on to what Peter and I had planned for the following day. "And you?"

"Same," I lied, and I knew she could tell. "Sleep in… Do homework… Go to bed early." Lies! Lies, all of them! "What about you guys?" I asked, nodding my head in the direction of Remus and Sirius.

Remus blinked. "What was the question? I was too busy listening to all the pointless crap Padfoot has to say…"

"Hey!"

"Relax. I reckon that maybe five percent of it is worthwhile."

I laughed. "What do you two have planned for tomorrow?"

"Remus and I will be flying away to – Moony, what's that Muggle resort island?"

He rolled his eyes. "Antarctica."

"Antarctica! Yes, Remus and I will be cruising off to Antarctica to sit in the sand beneath a palm tree, watching the sun set in a sublime palette of purples and reds, drinking Firewhiskey and listening to the waves lap peacefully at the shore –"

Ah, Sirius Black – the king of making up complete bullshit on the spot and having not a clue of what he was talking about. "No, really," I said, rolling my eyes.

Sirius looked scandalized. "What, Prongs? You don't believe me?"

"Remus?" I asked.

He shrugged, and trying not to smile, murmured, "Reading." But the way the werewolf had said it made me think that he wasn't being totally honest with me…

I was about to ask Peter what he was doing tomorrow, but I realized, giving myself a mental slap to the face, that he'd be pulling off a mountain of pranks with me. I glanced over his way, but decided not to interrupt him from reading his comic book.

--

POV – Lily

"Have either of you seen James this evening?"

Both Sirius and Remus glanced up from their food at the same time – it was comical, really – and shook their heads in tandem. "Haven't seen 'im since this afternoon," Sirius said with a shrug. "Probably up to no good, if you ask me."

And that was no surprise. Both James and Peter had been missing in action since six o'clock, and it was highly uncharacteristic of them to be skipping a meal – especially Peter. Their absence only made me more suspicious – not worried, mind you – suspicious. They were up to something, this I knew already – and I wasn't really sure I wanted to know what. James had been laying off the pranks for much of the latter half of the week, and his good behavior was a slight cause for concern.

Meanwhile, Sirius and Remus had maintained passable conduct, as well – making my job as a prefect way too easy. The reason for this, of course, was the fact that they'd found love in one another – a feat seemingly improbable, considering I, along with the rest of the school, had been fooled for six years into thinking that Sirius was as straight as they come. On the other hand, I had always known there was something different about Remus – besides the fact he was a werewolf, of course. Not that any of it mattered at all to me – it was far more pleasant having the two of them snogging everywhere rather than setting the school on fire.

"You four are all up to something, aren't you?" I asked lightly, taking a bite of mashed potatoes.

Remus shrugged. "Not that I know of…"

Either he was a damn good liar, or Remus was telling the truth. He turned back to his conversation with Sirius, and I opted to stay silent, and consider tomorrow. I had perfected the necessary spells for one last prank, and it would be a dandy charm involving the Whomping Willow. Best of all, it would be harmless, and still provide plenty of laughs at the same time.

"Hey, Evans – what makes you suspect us?" Sirius asked suddenly, trying – and failing – to look as innocent as possible. "Moony and I have been very well-behaved for the past couple of days, thank you very much."

"And that's what worries me," I said with a grin. "In my opinion, it's like the calm in the storm – the eye of the hurricane – and after a few moments of peace, everything goes to hell. If the four of you are in a plot together, you'd better tell me right now…"

"There's nothing to tell," Remus said calmly, "because the four of us are not in a plot together."

I wanted to believe him, but there was this glint in the boy's eyes that warned me otherwise…

--

POV – Sirius

James and Peter returned later that evening, not long after we'd all come back from dinner. They shuffled into the common room, arms laden with food they'd undoubtedly taken from the house elves, looking rather happy and satisfied about something.

"And just where the bugger were you?" I asked from the couch, Remus' shoulder providing a rather good headrest.

James laughed and took a seat at a nearby table, at once stuffing a biscuit into his mouth. "Sneaking," he said, and uncapped a bottle of Butterbeer.

"Going to the library," Peter said, which contradicted nicely and suspiciously with James' vague explanation. "You – you know, that essay due on Monday – about, uh, unicorns –"

"You mean centaurs?" Remus asked, glancing up from his book.

"Yeah, them," Peter said, looking rather panicked.

"Uh-huh," I grumbled, not believing a word of it. "Right. You two are mental."

"Not nearly as mental as you," Remus murmured dryly. "If there was an award given to the student with the most mood swings in one week, you, Sirius Black, would definitely be the recipient."

"Thanks a lot, Remus."

"You're welcome, Sirius." He kissed my forehead, then turned his attention back to his extremely boring-looking book – The Encyclopedia of the Equipment Used for the Transportation of Magical Creatures. It looked horrible – untouchable – and just thinking how much he would panic when he saw the library on Sunday – I had a hard time not laughing. As if Remus had heard my thoughts, he grumbled, "If you think I'm actually reading this, you're stupid."

"So you're just staring at the pages, Moony?"

"No. I'm thinking."

"That's news to me." This comment earned me a whack across the back of the head. Regaining what little was left of my dignity, I recovered and asked, "About what?"

"Tomorrow," Remus said, his voice lower than a whisper so James wouldn't hear. "The portraits will strip at approximately a quarter after nine – when everyone's at breakfast."

"We'll all lose our appetites," I said, trying not to snicker. "It'll be a vomit-fest! You're brilliant…"

"I know."

To be continued...
A/N: There you have it... And this means that the next chapter(s) showcase the following day... In other words, lots of laughs ensue! I hope you're having fun reading this. Drop me a review, and thanks for reading! You'll see Chapter Eight up within three or so days.

- mo