Walking confidently from the kitchen, Hunter couldn't help but smile to himself. Rubbing his hands together, he casually waltzed into the living quarters, taking a seat on the sofa next to his best friend.
"What are you so happy about?" Shawn spied.
"Oh nothing, let's just say the majority of us are gonna get fed well this morning!"
Shawn shrugged. "Ok."
"Hey, what happened to Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Duh?" Hunter questioned.
"Who Carlito and Randy? They were on about getting more alcohol or something and then shaving Carlito of his pussy." Kurt chimed in.
"Man, it's days like this it makes me glad that I'm tee-total!" Hunter chuckled.
Dancing back into the living room, Orton and Mr Cool had managed to obtain some more of their favourite beverages.
"So...Hunter," Randy slurred "Are you ready?"
"What do you mean 'are you ready'?"
"Are you ready to break it down with the Legend Killer?" he pouted, crotch chopping manically at his former mentor.
"You know, times like this also prove to me that Evolution has stopped completely and is going in the opposite direction!" Hunter joked, trying to cover up his uneasiness.
"What...c'mon man..." Randy strained his voice, chucking another dose of Vodka to the back of his throat, jeering at the fire burning in his mouth. "There's nothing to be ashamed of! Same sex relationships are soooo...sooooooooo much easier than they were back in the day!"
"What!" Hunter stood to his feet in utter shock "I don't fancy you! I'm a married man with a beautiful daughter!"
"Oh yeah...how could I forget? The only reason you are with...with that slag is coz you want glory a-and belts, lots of belts!" Orton let the drink do the talking for him.
Nostrils flaring, Hunter laid a huge slap against the side of Randy's face. "You bastard!" he snarled, watching the Legend Killer stumble to the ground.
Picking himself from the floor, Randy shook off the lasting effects of the slap. "Urgh." he muttered. "You made me spill my drink!"
"Why don't you lick it off the floor if you are that desperate?" Kurt nonchalantly spoke, carelessly flicking through one of Mama Benjamin's 'Home Cookery' Magazines.
"Wow...it's a bald...b...bald angel!" Randy giggled to himself, falling to the floor and sticking his tongue out, foolishly considering Angle's advice.
"NO!" Shawn yelled, leaping from the sofa to hoist Randy up "You don't know what's been on the carpet before now!"
"More of a reason for him to lick it!" Edge gleamed his arrogant smile, French kissing Lita.
"Lord help us!" Shawn mumbled to himself, running a hand through his blonde locks.
Carlito and Randy, by this time, barely remembered just where they were, let alone what they were drinking! Both collapsing on the floor in laughter, they both continued to guzzle Vodka, much to the distaste of Shawn, Kurt and Hunter.
"Just where are you getting this stuff from?" Kurt questioned.
"The base..ment!" Carlito uttered "Dat's cool down there!"
"We...we...we are nearly out, bro!" Randy spoke, eventually completing his sentence.
"Dat's no cool! Dat's no cool! Dat's no cool!" Carlito chanted, wobbly getting to his feet.
"We ought..." Randy began, getting to his feet with the help of the chair arm.
Abruptly, the Legend Killer turned a nasty shade of green. Puffing his cheeks out, he took one hand to clutch his stomach as the other covered his mouth.
"Tell me he's not going to be sick!" Shelton shook his head.
"I'd like to say no but I'd be lying." Shawn answered.
"Do you think he ought to go to the bathroom or something?" Hunter suggested, pulling an uneasy face.
"Too late." Kurt squirmed, closing his eyes tightly on the puke coming from Randy's mouth.
A few moments of stomach churning noises passed...
"Ummm, Carlito, you may want to take your shoes off!" Edge advised, peering down to the floor.
"Dat...dat's no cool Randy!" Carlito sneered, trying his best to remove his shoes without any, ummm, accidents.
As all eight wrestlers sat staring at the liquid mass on the carpet, there was only one question on every bodies minds;
"Is anyone actually gonna clear that up?" Kurt addressed the situation.
"Well, I...ca...can't!" Randy stammered, still holding his abs firmly "I was the person being ill!"
"That's more of a reason for you to clear it up!" Triple H knocked his arm.
"Ha, no way am I doing it!" Edge chimed in "That's woman's work!" he joked, massaging Lita's biceps.
"Well, I dunno why everyone's looking at Lita then!" Hunter mocked, Lita's face turning awfully sour.
Before Edge could stick up for his girlfriend, Mama Benjamin came into the room, complete with a wooden spoon.
"Hi everyone...oh my, who was ill?"
"That would be me!" Randy shut his eyes tightly, still looking a little worse for wear.
"Are you ok now?"
"Just swell!" he responded half heartedly, still tipsy.
"Great! The curry's nearly ready, my Edge's favourite!" she grinned, stroking Edge's well defined chin bone. "I'll bring it all out in a few minutes!" she added, strolling back into the kitchen. "I've done it nice and spicy...just how you like it!"
Edge's face turned from cocky to damn near ill! "I...I hate curry!" he stared at Lita, wide eyed and confused as to where Mrs. Benjamin even considered that he loved spicy foods.
"Really?" Hunter pretended to be shocked "Oooppps, my bad!"
"You?" Edge rose, hardly containing his anger.
"Oh yes, you see, Mama had to cook something and that's the only thing that she could cook. She really wanted to please you, really she did. I just happened to hint to her that you had cravings for spicy food...just how you like your women!"
"You piss head!" Edge snarled.
"Oh, don't worry, it is chicken! I thought it would be a nice change to pork!" Hunter chocked back laughter, winking over at Lita.
Before Edge could retaliate, Mama sauntered back into the living room, carefully handling a massive plate piled with curry!
"Here you go Edge, baby." She started, handing him the plate "I thought I'd give you yours first...it'll give you energy for later!" she cooed, ambling back into the kitchen to serve everyone else.
"Come on Edge, get started!" Shawn urged.
"After all, what are you waiting for, Edgey-poo!" Hunter mimicked.
"I've had enough of you!" Edge spat, handing Lita his plate "DX is the crapest faction alive!"
"Oh no, that winds getting up again!" the King of Kings mocked, him and his best friend turning away for the Rated R Superstar.
Edge, stomping back to his seat, retook the plate and glared at it in a lot less than amusement. Cursing to himself he knew there was no point in arguing. Hesitantly taking tiny portions onto his folk, he made the best of the only meal he had had in over fifteen hours.
But does everyone enjoy their curry?
Next time in 'Things That Go Bump In The Night!'...
Can everyone stomach Mama Benjamin's cooking? How is the snow looking in the cold light of morning?
Check back for more, soon!