Chapter 6: Donuts and Mumbo (and Everyone Wants Angela for Some Reason)
Disclaimer: Hi! Guess what! I don't own anything in this story except Melody and Gertrude and Donuts 'n Mocha (you will see a ton of self-promotion, but hey, they're a hit.) and my spiffy new Dell LAPTOP! Yes, I got a laptop for Christmas. But by the time I get Internet on this thing, this chapter will be kinda late. Sorry…
I would like to offer my sincere apologies to Queen of Duct Tape and everyone else I put in here (you'll see…) and the owners of their respective characters that I'm going to add into the next few chapters. However, if you're a copyright lawyer and you're reading this, well, WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON A FANFICTION SITE ANYWAY? Shouldn't you be tracking down those hackers that keep getting their hands on illegally downloaded mp3 files? Huh? Huh! Shouldn't you?
For the record, I have never actually been to Scotland. I have never left the U.S. (But I want to.)
On another note, today's Miserable Titan Character is none other than Mumbo, a.k.a. The Great Bluedini! Let the show begin!
"Gertrude! Yay! You actually kept your promise this time!" Melody was squealing like a sugar-high fangirl at a live taping of the O.C. (Or whatever.) She opened the door to the receptionist's desk and ripped open the brand new box of Donuts 'n Mocha donuts. Gertrude was thrilled. "Donuts 'n Mocha donuts! Wow. How did you manage to get donuts from that Scarlett chick in Scotland? Ordered them online, you must have."
"Um, no, Yoda, I didn't order them online. Angela came back to Jump City a few weeks ago. She just graduated. Donuts 'n Mocha was so successful in Europe that she had to move back here to keep business moving. And because Cyborg kept trying to stalk her online." Melody stifled a giggle at the last sentence.
"Oh, come on, I know you're jealous about that. You like Cyb-"
"I DO NOT!" Melody blushed heavily.
"Melody and Cyborg, sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes-"
"Mumbo, the Great Bluedini, has arrived!" A voice announced at the front door. Immediately Melody sprinted out the door and greeted the teal-skinned magician in the waiting room.
"H-Hi, Mumbo. I'll be ready in a few minutes, so why don't you CHECK IN and let my RECEPTIONIST get you squared away. OK?" She shot Gertrude a glare and dashed down to her office. Mumbo sauntered over to Gertrude's desk and took out his checkbook.
"Do I need to pay before or after the appointme- HEY! Are those from Donuts 'n Mocha? Those are the best donuts in Europe! How did you manage to get them?" Mumbo asked, hoping to snag one from Gertrude's sticky, sprinkle-covered fingers.
Gertrude did not reply.
"I asked you a question." Mumbo snapped.
Gertrude did not reply.
"Can I have one?" he asked.
Gertrude still did not reply.
"May I please have one?" Mumbo pleaded.
Gertrude still did not reply.
"All right, you leave me no choice. Alaka-ZAM!" Mumbo took out his wand and shot red demon-bunnies (a la Bunny Raven, but in this case, Bunny Trigon) at the glass window.
Gertrude didn't even bother to reply. She was too busy trying to finish her 22nd chocolate-filled donut with 35 more sprinkles.
"Dr. Stefani will see you now, Mumbo." The nurse had just opened the door to the hallway leading to Melody's office.
"Oh, thank you very much. But first, flowers for the (cough) lady at the front desk." Mumbo tossed a small bouquet at the glass window where the demon-bunnies had crashed and died on impact. The bouquet squirted water all over the panel. Gertrude looked over and blew an enormous raspberry at the Great Bluedini, who had just entered Melody's office.
A few hours later, a group of giggly teenagers made their way over to Gertrude's desk. "Hi, um, is this where we can find Angela Scarlett? We're friends of hers from, uh, Scotland and we were wondering if…"
Gertrude's eyes widened. "YOU KNOW ANGELA SCARLETT? COOL! DO YOU KNOW WHERE SHE LIVES!"
The kids stared at her. "No…"
"That's why we're asking you." One of the younger kids said.
"Well, I don't know, and even if I did, I wouldn't tell you because I don't think she would want a bunch of people stalking her all day today." Gertrude snapped as she took out a pink highlighter and furiously began to unfold a road map of the Jump City/Steel City area.
At that moment, another girl came in, wearing a roll of duct tape on her head. "Um, am I in the right place? Angela said she was going to be at Dr. Stefani's office this morning and she wanted me to meet her at the pizza place…?"
Gertrude sighed. "I think she meant the Jump City office." Realizing what she had just said, she quickly sputtered, "N-no, that's not what I meant, uh, she probably meant the, uh, Mumbo City area! Yeah! Go look over there! Where…ever that is…" Mumbo being the first thing that popped into her head, she quickly tried to amend the situation by saying, "Oops, did I say Mumbo? Sorry, I meant, uh…"
But it didn't matter. The duct-tape-clad girl had already made her way out the door. "Hey, Queen of Duct Tape, wait for us too! We're your friends too, you know!" The younger girl that had spoken earlier cried out.
Gertrude didn't want to let the other kids escape, so she quickly ran out to the waiting room and jumped in front of them. "No, I can't let you guys get out, too. I've already let it slip. Can't let more stalkers get away. Speaking of stalkers…" Gertrude then burst out the door, locked it from the outside, and followed the Queen of Duct Tape.
The kids were confused. Dr. Stefani's office door was locked, the main door was locked, and the nurse's shift was over. They were alone in the waiting room.
"Hey Horhay, did SUPERHORHAY give you anything else besides that spiffy cape?" The younger girl asked the older girl beside her.
"No, I actually haven't seen SUPERHORHAY lately, so all I have is my spiffy cape. Which is sad, but I like it!" Horhay Applesand Bonono replied.
"Oh. Oh well." The younger girl said.
"Hey Shippy, wanna sneak some donuts?" asked a girl with a broadsword in her hand.
Shippy (the younger girl) grinned. "You bet, Kay. Twinny, come on!" She motioned toward another girl in the corner.
Kay and Twinny followed Shippy back into Gertrude's area and took the box out. "Ooh, Shippy, look, there's some mocha here too! There's like, five of them! And they're unopened!" Twinny shrieked.
"Um, not anymore…" Kay whimpered. Her broadsword had punctured the lid of one of the mochas and now it was leaking a little.
"Heehee, Kay, I guess you're right." Twinny laughed as she took a sip of an unopened mocha. Shippy was digging through the drawers for some tape to repair Kay's busted mocha lid. "Found some!"
"Toss it here, Ship!" Kay dropped her broadsword on the floor.
"Erm, ok, Kay! Here it comes!" Shippy tossed the tape… a little too far. The tape dispenser went flying through the glass panel out to the waiting room and hit one of the boys in the head.
"Oops! Sorry Noodles! Are you OK?" Twinny ran out into the waiting room to help her injured friend.
Noodles moaned. "Ouch, Ship, that hurt." He whined in his British accent.
"Here, Noodly, take my spiffy cape and wrap it around your head. It might make you feel better." Horhay took her spiffy cape off and tossed it onto Noodles's head. Twinny tied it around his neck and wrapped his head with it. Noodles now resembled something related to a mummy. "Twinny, please get this off my head. It doesn't hurt that bad."
Shippy and Kay came out of Gertrude's area, carrying a large box of donuts and a few more mochas, along with Kay's broadsword and her busted beverage. "Let's try to finish this before that psycho comes back." Another boy, Devilin, suggested. "Hmm, what should we do first?"
A Filipino girl turned around. "Are you talking to me?"
"No, not you, Hmm, he was just SAYING 'hmm.'" Noodles snapped at her.
Hmm frowned. "Well, I was just asking. Kay, can you hand me a donut?" Kay tossed her one. "Thanks." Hmm grinned.
Hmm's sisters, Raine and Lady Goat, took two of the mochas out of Shippy's hands. "Nobody else claimed them, right?" Raine asked. Shippy looked around and shook her head. Raine slurped up her mocha happily.
Dementor, Brown Dog, Rutu, Kelebek, Dutchie, Nashi, Scurvy, Lilyfae, Padma, Kool Kat, Small, Turtle, Loony, Drooly, Joanna Potter, Moody Joe, and Robbie, the rest of the kids, were all playing hide-and-seek when Mumbo had just left Dr. Stefani's office. "What are you kids doing out here? Do you have an appointment?"
Brown Dog screamed. "WHO ARE YOU!"
"Why, you don't know who I am? I am Mumbo the Magnificent! I used to be a criminal, but now that the warden is making me go to therapy, I'm a happy stage magician with no intent of criminal mischief! What about you?"
Brown Dog didn't know what to say. "Um, do you know Angela Scarlett? She's lurking around this area nowadays…"
Mumbo nodded. "Ah, yes, the girl that makes the best donuts in Europe. I know her. She threatened to sic the Titans on me once, but we ended up having a nice conversation about hecklers. You know, those rude people in the audience that shouts unnecessary and often stupid things out to the people on stage?" Mumbo explained to a very confused Brown Dog. "Oh. Well, kid, that's showbiz. You always have hecklers in an otherwise wonderful audience." Mumbo sweatdropped.
As everyone made their way out to the now-crowded waiting room, Dr. Stefani came over to heckle Gertrude (no reason), only to discover-
"WHERE DID SHE GO!" A vein in Melody's head pulsed. Angrily, she dialed Gertrude's cell phone number.
Meanwhile, at the Jump City pizza place, Gertrude was getting closer to Angela, and closer, and closer…
THWACK! Someone tossed an old newspaper onto her head.
"Don't wanna be an American idiot! One nation controlled by the media…" Her tacky ringtone began playing. Really loud. "Oh, crap." She muttered. She was almost out of the bushes when she and the Queen of Duct Tape made eye contact. Busted.
"Hey, don't tell Angela I'm here. Like last time…" Gertrude hissed as she dashed down the stairs, into the pizza place, and into the women's restroom.
It was full.
"OK, I gotta go." She escaped the long line in the bathroom and fleed to her Hummer.
Which now has a ticket on it.
"WHAT THE KLORBAG DID I GREMPLORK DO!" Gertrude yelled as she read the ticket. It turns out that she violated the parking rules. "Whatever."
"…hysteria. It's calling out to idiot America!" Her cell phone began ringing again. Irritated, she answered it.
"Welcome to the Funny Farm! How may I direct your call?"
Melody's voice began to scream. "WHERE ARE YOU! YOU'VE LEFT WITHOUT TELLING ME, AND YOU'VE LOCKED A BUNCH OF KIDS UP THAT SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN BEEN HERE, though they told me about their situation and I've already taken care of it. YOU BETTER GET BACK HERE IN THE NEXT HOUR OR ELSE I'M FIRING YOU, GOT IT!" Then there was a click. Melody had hung up.
Gertrude panicked. "No! I don't want to lose my job! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!" She bawled all the way back to Steel City.
Gertrude's busted, y'all! Wow… that was a huge chapter. Anyway, I'm sorry if I didn't include some people (and I know I didn't), but it was because I either A) couldn't find a good nickname for you (like Ravenclaw4life, I couldn't think of anything I could use) or B) couldn't remember (I don't have Internet yet, as of this typing). I wanted to squeeze in as many people as I could. As for my self-promotion, well, it's not like I'm the ruler of the world or anything, I just wanted to add in Donuts 'n Mocha™ and make it fit somehow. Sorry if for some reason I offend you for using something not TT. But nyah. It's my story.
Angela Scarlett (The one that shall conquer the Internet!)