Encore

Ellie sat on her bed, staring across her room. There sat Verity's bed, empty, her things gone. That room that'd she'd lived in for almost a month and a half was just hers, only hers. There was no more Verity and Ellie. No more Ellie and Verity. No more us, we them, they're, their. It was just Ellie. Alone. Just as alone as the time's her mother drank herself into oblivion, making the house seem more empty than it was when no one was home. Just as alone as she felt the night her and Sean decided to take a break. Just as alone as she felt every time her father left to support their country. Only this wasn't abandonment, and Verity was never coming back.

This was the first human loss Ellie had been exposed to. She'd never met the grandparents her mother spoke highly of on some occasions. She'd never lost an aunt or uncle. She'd never lost a lover, a pet, a neighbor, or even an acquaintance. Ellie had lost who could be described as one of the best friends she had away from home. Ellie never got to say 'goodbye', in fact Ellie had barely even said 'hello.'

Jerzy looked into the room, at the empty side where Verity usually slept and then across the room to where Ellie sat, staring at the other side of the room. It broke his heart, not only to lose a friend, but to see someone who didn't know how to mourn the loss. He knocked gently on the door frame, "hey…" he said softly.

Ellie looked up, smiling gently as Jerzy walked into the room and sat down on the bed. Ellie leaned her head on Jerzy's shoulder, and stared at the bare walls, that Verity's pictures and pieces of her life once resided. "You okay?" he asked. Ellie lifted her head up and shifted herself back until her back was pressed against the cool plaster walls.

She shrugged, "I guess so."

"I didn't think she'd actually do it." Jerzy mentioned, "I mean, I knew she thought about, but I always figured she'd just…chicken out."

Ellie looked over at him, "you know it's not your fault right…there was nothing you could have done."

"but how do we know that, what if I told Dr. B or Mo? What then? There's a chance they could have kept a better eye on her."

"and if her mind was that made up, an extra eye wouldn't have mattered Jerz…she would have found a way if she was so determined."

Jerzy sighed, " I just feel like…I could have done something, talked to her more."

" there was no changing her mind, she was crying herself to sleep at night, she was in pain." Ellie concluded, "her parents make me sick," she took her focus away from the wall.

Jerzy turned to her, " what do you mean?"

"they didn't even come pick up her stuff, they sent like, her dad's secretary, and I hear her mom is suing Lake View"

" damnit…don't they realize this is one of the only decent facilities? I mean, they are so relaxed here, I feel willing to talk, to get better, they can't take this away from me, they'll send us all to the Riverdale center."

"what's the difference?" Ellie asked naively.

"bad doctors, bad staff, bad food, bad facilities in general El, I was lucky my mom had the money to send me here."

It was with that statement that Ellie knew she was lucky enough to have a mother who cared enough to send her to the best place, despite how much of a drunk she was. It didn't matter how much her mother would drink or yell; her mother loved her.

Ellie leaned her head on Jerzy's shoulder, who looked over and smiled, and mussed her hair up, "come on squirt…" sliding off the bed, he offered a hand to her and helped her to her feet, "time for dinner."

-X-

Ellie was sitting alone in her room, still no new roommate. Ellie wasn't sure if she'd even want another one. Max knocked on the door way and walked in, "Can we talk?" he asked. Ellie looked up from her homework and sighed, and set aside her binder and notebooks and made room on her bed for Max to sit down. "I'm sorry," he said simply, " I didn't know that my playing matchmaker upset you so much."

Ellie sighed, "it's alright."

"obviously it's not…I don't need a drumstick through my head El."

Ellie giggled, "I'm sorry about that Max, I just got upset…"

" Yea I got that much, look, I just thought you and Orion would be good for each other."

"we kissed" Ellie blurted out and then quickly covered her mouth.

"what?"

"twice…we kissed twice…"

"oh my…spill! Details girl!"

Ellie laughed, "nothing special…I just…Max, it just won't work, no matter how hard Orion tries, no matter how hard I try to forget about Sean, and no matter how hard you keep trying to play matchmaker, it's just not something that'll work out."

Max sighed, " okay, I suppose even the best matchmaker fails once in a while." Ellie laughed, "forgiven?" he asked.

Ellie nodded, "of course, how could I stay mad at you Maxamillion?"

Max smiled, "Orion is leaving in the morning, you ready for group," he remembered.

Ellie frowned, "I completely forgot about it." She'd also forgotten about the going-away party they had planned for the next group session. It wasn't going to be anything special, and with all the stress and going-ons since Verity had, Ellie gulped, since Verity killed herself. Ellie wanted to hate Verity so much for that, but she couldn't. "Yea, I'll be ready, what time is he leaving?"

"his grandfather is picking him up after dinner, wanted to give him a chance to have proper goodbyes I guess."

Ellie nodded, "I'm gunna go check my d-mail, I'll catch you later, Maxamillion" she said kissing him on the cheek and skipping off to snag a computer pass while they were still available.

-X-

To: BaddaBoom

From: NOlabels

Subject: 911

Verity killed herself

I don't want to be here anymore

-Ellie

It was so simple and to the point. Ellie didn't know what else to say. She could bare to write out how she'd been feeling, about how much she hated Verity for doing this, or at least how much she wanted to hate her…She didn't know who to talk to. Then she mentally smacked her forehead and began to type a new d-mail.

To: MsSauve

From: NOlabels

Subject: 911

Ms. Sauve:

I honestly don't know who else to talk to. I could try and tell Marco or Ash, or even Sean and Tracker how I'm feeling, but right now I don't know how to let it out in a way that they could possibly understand. My roommate here at Lake View killed herself. Strangled herself with her belt in the middle of the night. I found her, eyes open staring at me the next morning. I didn't know what to do. I was just at a lose for words, and so angry. I wanted to shake her so hard that she'd wake up, but she never did. I want to hate her for being so selfish, I know it's wrong to speak ill of the dead, but why did she have to be so stupid? I don't understand Ms Sauve, I don't…

I want to hate her for killing herself. I want to hate her so much it's killing me. It's like another person has left me. I want to hate her, just like I want to hate my father for ever assignment he agrees to. I want to hate my mother for every bottle she says she hasn't drank. I want to hate Sean for breaking up with me. I want to hate Marco for spending so much time with Dylan, I want to hate Ash for spending so much time with Craig and then pretending that her problems are worse than mine. Is that wrong of me?

Worst of all, I want to hate myself for not noticing that she was hurting. Every night when I'd comfort her while she was crying herself to sleep I ignored the signs. I didn't even know I was supposed to be looking for signs, I feel like I should have prevented it, prevented this all.

I can't bare to stay in this room, everyday I wake up thinking everything that happened was a dream. That Verity was just playing a joke and she'll be there when I wake up. Why do I feel so responsible?

Ellie Nash

Ellie looked at what she'd just written and hesitantly hit the send button. She let her head drop and ran her fingers through her hair, gently massaging her scalp. She just wanted an answer. An answer as to why she was feeling the way she was. Ellie rested her head on the table and looked up when she heard the computer make a familiar sound and a message flashed across the screen:

1 New Message

Ellie sat up and rolled the cursor until she could click on the new message. She wasn't sure what to expect. After all, what could a school guidance counselor really say to make her feel any less responsible or any less upset?

To: NOlabels

From: MsSauve

Subject: RE: 911

Ellie:

It's great to hear from you, though I wish it were under better circumstances. I'm sorry to hear about your roommate. I can honestly say I don't know what it feels like, but I'm sure you're in tremendously good hands. It's good that you're willing to communicate all that your feeling with someone, whether it's to me, or to one of your doctor's there at Lake View. I can tell you this though, what someone else does has nothing to do with you. I've told you that many times before. What someone else does is their decision, and theirs alone, you caring for her may have only prolonged her final decision to do what she did. I'm sure it's tough for you, but you shouldn't hate her for wanting to do what she did. That will only make it harder for you, instead celebrate her life and the times you shared together. Don't let bitterness intercede. If you ever need anyone to talk to, you know the d-mail address, and you know I'm always willing to talk to you.

Sonya Sauve

Ellie smiled as she finished reading. It was just like Sauve to assure her that she's completely sane, in a suave fashion. She felt guilty for not keeping better contact over the past month. She smiled, and replied with a quick 'thanks Sauve, means a lot" and left it at that. Just as she was heading to the music room, for the third time that day (in between group sessions and private sessions) Marie Mohavi stopped her gently in the hall way and asked her into her office. Ellie sat down.

"What's up Dr. Mo?" she asked.

Marie sat down and looked through her notes, "we're discharging you at the end of the week."

Ellie looked at the young woman and smiled nervously, "end of the week?"

"Yes, I'm sure you've heard about the Russo's case against Lake View, we're discharging some patients to other facilities and some home, most seem rehabilitated enough to be with their families, and after the incident with Verity, we think it's better for you to be with your mother."

Ellie sat quietly for a moment, " I don't know what to say…"

"Well this is what's going to happen, you're mother is coming up Saturday evening, we're going to sign some legal work, and you're going to agree to a strict psychological regimen, we're going to recommend that you see your school counselor at least once a week, and you'll be referred to a Dr. Crescent…"

"man or woman?" Ellie asked.

"excuse me?" Marie asked.

"I feel more comfortable talking to a woman, I was just wondering is Dr. Crescent a …"

"woman," Marie said smiling, "Dr. Rhonda Crescent,…you'll be seeing her twice a week, and there's a teen group counseling session on Wednesdays at your local youth center, we'll be signing you up…"

"Dr.Mo?"

"Yes?"

"Is all this really necessary?" Ellie asked.

"We're discharging you early…if it were under other circumstances you'd only be required to only go to the group sessions and check in with either Cresecent or…"she flipped through her notes, "Sauve, you're school counselor."

Ellie nodded, "but I mean…"

"no buts, Ellie," Marie said smiling and lightly shaking her head, " when you reach what will be your two month mark, we'll see how you're doing and adjust you accordingly, it's not as tough as it sounds Ellie."

"what I mean is, I have a job…when am I going to have time to do all this?" she asked.

"I'm sure we can arrange things around for you."

Ellie smiled, "so is that it?" she asked, "am I free to go."

"yes Ellie, you're free to go."

-X-

Ellie sat in the music room and gently strummed a guitar and hummed along with no specific tune. Orion quietly entered the room and slid in at the piano and gently ran his fingers over the ivory keys before he gently playing a chord in key with one Ellie was playing on the guitar. Ellie spun her head around. "What are you doing here?"

"playing the piano?" Orion asked, he looked down at the keys and began to play softly, and then stopped, "you know I'm leaving tomorrow, right, milady?"

Ellie spun the chair around, "yea, I know." Orion looked away from her gaze and tickled the keys of the piano, he opened his mouth to speak but Ellie cut him off, "so where's home?"

"Elora…" his finger pressed down on middle C.

"that's out by Fergus, right?"

Orion looked up, "yea, why?"

"My Aunt lives in Fergus," she answered.

"that's nice" Orion answered and hit middle C again, "Ellie this is ridiculous, his fingers slammed down on the piano." Ellie stopped fiddling with the guitar and looked up at Orion with sad eyes. "We're attracted to each other, we like the same things, we understand each other…why do we keep doing this stupid dance? We keep dancing around on hot coals, pretending like this is something bad, but it's not!" he shouted, upset.

"I don't…"

"love me like you love Sean?" he asked angrily, "but you obviously do care enough about me to compare him to me and me to him."

Ellie's eyes were watering, "don't yell at me."

"I'm not yelling at you," Orion said standing up and walking over to her, "I care about you, a lot. I don't understand why we keep playing these stupid games."

"I'm not trying to play games Orion, I just want Sean."

"And what if he's moved on?"

"It's been almost two months Ellie, what if he's moved on to someone else…"

Ellie didn't answer, she didn't want to answer, "regardless of whether him and I are together he cares about me, and I'd rather have him as a friend than not have him at all."

Orion bent down in front of her and wiped her tears away before they could fall, and she turned her head into his hand, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean…"

"I know…I just…I want to move on, but I don't think I can…"

"I'd like to help."

Ellie looked at him, and leaned forward, gently kissing his head, "I'd like that." Orion smiled, "but I don't want a relationship, can we be friends?"

Orion sighed heavily, "do you think we can handle being friends?"

Ellie smiled slightly, "I'd like to at least try."

"as you wish milady" he said gently kissing her hand, "as you wish."

A/N: Verity's suicide has been planned since I began writing the sequel. It was either going to be more of a severe shocker on Ellie's part and she was going end up staying longer, but I missed writing her with Sean, and I've got other drama planned for her when she gets back...Orion and Ellie are going to remain good friends (who occasionally can't keep their hands off each other) and her and Sean will be struggling with their current friendship and wanting/yearning to be more. We'll see how the Ellie/Sean works out, believe me they'll be pulling each other in every which way and toying with their own and each other's emotions. There will be more interaction between them, I promise. There will still be interaction between Ellie and the LV crew, mostly through emails and such, and a few may be getting out and going home as well.

I'm glad you guys are liking it, but I'd appreciate it if you'd stop asking whether or not Sean and Ellie are getting back together, it's kind of redundant, and I'm not going to answer your question, it'll be answered as you read.

As to Ellie dealing with Verity's suicide...we'll see, part of Ellie knew it was going to happen, but as you can see, she's struggling to deal with it, and we'll really be needing the support of her friends.

Thanks for all the reviews! Off to work on bits and pieces of the next chapter (where in Sean finds out about Ellie coming home, and has a talk with Tracker)