Thanks to everyone who gave me a review I really appreciate it, even if I don't respond. Please give me suggestions if you think I need it.

Disclaimer: I still don't own any of the characters/situations etc that make up RENT or obvious brand names (like Tylenol). Sorry if my story is similar to yours, it's not intentional.

I returned an hour later with two sets of AZT, powdered soup mix (it's cheaper than the canned stuff), some tea bags and a bottle of Tylenol. I could live without my cigarettes or any other tiny luxuries we'd allowed ourselves for a while, if it meant Mark would get better. I put the food on the kitchen table and poured a glass of water to bring Mark his first dose of miracle pills.

I found him propped up in bed, glasses on, eyes closed. He looked worse than when I left him, although the shivering had slowed down considerably.

"Hey." I whispered, putting the glass of water and bottle of pills on the nightstand so I could drag a chair over.

"Sit on the bed with me." Mark rasped, eyes open, pleading for a shred of comfort.

I quickly obliged, sitting opposite him on the dilapidated mattress.

"Feeling any better?" I joked nervously.

"A little, now that you're back." Mark wheezed.

I smiled, same old sentimental Mark. As clichéd as it sounds, my heart ached to know how much suffering I had caused him, for so long.

"Ready for your AZT?"

He shrugged, trying to salvage any dignity he had left.

"I'll take that as a yes."

I shook out two pills, one for him, one for me.

"Cheers." I muttered, handing him the glass of water.

He struggled to swallow the pill, his throat raw from coughing so hard. My own throat seized at his discomfort. He was so sick, how had I not realized it sooner?

"I'm gonna go call Collins to be with you for a little bit. I- I need to get out." I stumbled. I just couldn't take it; I needed to figure out what the hell I was going to do now.

Mark nodded, but I could see the disappointment in his eyes. I think he understood, but that didn't make me feel any better about abandoning him again. I left the room quickly before I changed my mind. I dialed Collins' familiar number, almost hanging up twice. He answered on the typical third ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey Collins, It's Roger."

"What's up dude? You okay? You sound funny."

I sighed before explaining, giving him the condensed version because I couldn't deal with the truth.

"Mark is sick. I mean really sick," I started shakily. " I need to get out for a couple hours. Could you come over just in case he needs something while I'm gone?"

"Of course, you need anything? I'll be over in ten minutes tops, don't leave before I get there."

"Thanks."

I hung up. I wasn't sure I could make it until Collins came, so I busied myself gathering a notebook, pen and my leather jacket.

The metal door rattled open five minutes later.

"You okay?" Collins asked, wrapping me in a hug.

"I don't know. Just take care of him for me, I'll be home later tonight."

He gave me a 'you better not do something you'll regret later' look before nodding.

"See you later." I muttered, walking out the still open door.

read and review, i'd love to know what you think of it so far! next chapter coming soon, i hope.