Chapter 4: Goin' Medieval

Well well well…I guess Yu-Gi-Oh is finished…for good. (Since the entire series finished on YTV…finally, about 10 years later) But the remnants of this oh-so-lengthy series will always exist in some dark crevice of my mind. By the way…Azumanga Daioh, Erementar Gerad, Full Moon wo Sagashite, and Galaxy Angel are awesome shows! If you get the chance, be sure to check them out on I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, its related characters, AdventureQuest or Rona...or anything really. :(

Seto was extremely unimpressed, and grouchy. For some "unexplained" reason, he felt as if someone had drugged him with litres of novocaine and thumped him on the noggin with a heavy baseball bat. Also, he could not help but feel a wave of nausea wash over him…did someone give him laxatives?

But then he realized he had a much more severe situation on his hand. He slowly turned his head to a pile of white flesh, claws, fangs, and tails. Oh yes…there they were, those bothersome, accursed, damned cheap versions of his almighty Blue Eyes White Dragon.

"WHY! Why must fate be so cruel to me!" An exasperated lament escaped Seto's lips.

"You've finally woken up…woohoo!" Meteora's voice boomed from a randomly placed hidden speaker. "Did I mention that Noah won the first challenge?"

The aqua-haired teenager popped out of nowhere and gave him a cheesy smile and a thumbs-up.

"Hey, not fair. I went through so much!" Seto retorted angrily.

"Well…Noah's BEWDs were much happier than yours. I guess you aren't really in touch with your feminine side." Meteora chuckled.

"You know, if you keep this up. I'm going to never ask you for help ever again." Seto hollered.

"Eh, I don't like helping you anyways. It's not like I get paid to do it."

"Oh…" Seto could not think of a decent comeback for that one.

"Anyways, moving on…today's challenge!" Meteora ignored Seto's loss for words. "I've decided that since you two have already gotten enough of feminine-related affairs, the next challenge shall be more masculine. The theme shall be Camelot…because lately I've played way too much RPG games. I'm sure you two educated 'gentlemen' have heard of the story of King Arthur and the Excalibur. So…this challenge shall be a similar modified version. That is all…I'm off to play more AdventureQuest!"

"What detailed instructions!" Noah rolled his eyes.

Fortunately for Seto, at the precise moment when Meteora signed off, the baby BEWDs all vanished into thin air…or so he thought. Taking their place was a viciously sharp-looking sword with its hilt encased in a solid bed of rock. A silver glimmer glistened at the exposed blade, completing an aura of enigma and power around the weapon.

"Very formidable." Noah commented nonchalantly.

He approached the Excalibur and examined the encased portion more closely. For a while, Noah knocked at the rock with his knuckles and listened intently for any fault in the rock.

Then, drawing a sharp breath, the lanky teenager tugged at the elaborately decorated malachite pommel with all his strength. Despite the veins bulging beneath his "muscles" and sweat beads forming at his face, the blade did not even budge.

"Damn this! I need some power tools!" Noah cursed.

Seto merely watched.

"Oh look! A Rona hardware store!" Noah pointed at a store nearby. "I am saved!"

After a few minutes and a few thousand virtual dollars, Noah came back victoriously. In his hands was a formidable-looking jackhammer.

"I'm gonna get it!" Screeching victoriously, Noah turned on the jackhammer and drilled intently at the rock. Clouds of dust began to form, soon obscuring everything form sight.

When the dust cleared up, however, Noah discovered that the rock was safe and sound…in fact, not a scratch appeared on the jagged grey surface. Instead, the drill of his jackhammer was worn away.

"No way!" Noah stared in horror. "But I always have a backup plan!"

The crazed teenager held a flamethrower over his head. "Now…my reign of fury shall commence! Noah PWNS you all!" Laughing hysterically, Noah cackled like an old witch.

But Noah's "reign of fury" had to wait a while. The call of nature interrupted him rudely. "Er…be right back. I need to use the washroom!" Noah waved at Seto, and walked head-first into a tree.

"Oof!" Noah rubbed at his injured head.

"But…I don't understand…that was supposed to be where the bathroom was!" Noah pouted.

"Hey, Noah…maybe that wooden sign that says 'here be ye olde john' is what you're looking for. You nimrod." Seto pointed a lazy finger.

"Right!"

After Noah's Trip to ye olde john

Noah headed back after half an hour and found Seto asleep on a nearby rock.

"Seto…" Noah shook the groggy brunette awake.

"Eh…Kisara…no, baby, don't stop now…" Obviously Seto was not fully awake.

Noah gave Seto another shake to gain his attention.

"Oh…Noah…what happened to you? You look really pale." Seto observed his step-brother's face with a lazy yawn.

"Ye olde john…no toilet paper…leaves…"

"Ha, you hapless sop." Seto chuckled. "Now…aren't you going to complete your 'reign of fury'?"

With a barely audible groan which sounded like "yes…", Noah shakily picked up the flamethrower and commenced his business.

Well…guess what happened instead. After 5 tries, the rock still felt solid and even cool to touch. Noah, in sheer fury, dragged some dynamite (which just happened to be lying around) towards the encased sword and detonated the soundly explosion.

The damned rock was still there, safe and sound.

"Screw this! At this rate I'm going to need an atomic bomb!"

And all of a sudden a brilliant idea hatched inside Noah's thick-headed brain. The teenager eagerly ran into the distance.

Several hours later and Noah still hadn't returned. Seto lazily scanned the horizon line for any trace of his brother, but only saw a mushroom-shaped plume of smoke rising languidly.

"Hmm…I thought I would have heard that." Standing up, Seto Kaiba headed unhurriedly towards the Excalibur. "Well…I suppose it's my turn now."

"Squeak!" To Seto's sheer fright, he suddenly discovered a very familiar creature clinging to his ankle. It was that particularly chubby BEWD from yesterday.

"Oh no you don't!" Anger boiled up inside of Seto. "You are to never approach me again! NEVER!" In a blind rage-filled wrath, the CEO gave a powerful kick with his leg and sent the little dragon sailing away.

And it just so happened that the dragon landed on an inconspicuous spot near the rock. With a low groan, the rock readily split in half, releasing the sword, which just happened to fall into Seto's outstretched hands.

"…" For the second time in this chapter, Seto was at a loss for words.

"I must thanketh thee for thy assistance in returning to me the Excalibur." Out of the blue, the BEWD sat upright and spoke with a masculine, booming voice. "Now…to the Round Table!" With a deft whistle, a stalwart chestnut stallion reared into sight and the dragonlet climbed onto the saddle.

"Farewell, brave adventurer!" The BEWD waved its chubby white claws in reverence. Seto stared at the atrocity he was presented with until it was out of sight. He blinked and gained consciousness.

"This means that I won…right?"

Done this chapter! Finally! And Noah isn't severely injured, everyone…he can't die in the virtual world!