Chapter…8! Yeah. I almost forgot…
By now, we all know that Marth and Peach have been making out for the past two chapters. Including this one, cause they weren't done yet. Even though the considerably loud moans from upstairs disturbed Marth (who was still floored), it continued.
Then Yoshi came in the room. He sighed heavily.
Marth and Peach continued. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed something very strange about Yoshi.
He seemed incredibly sad.
"Hold on," Marth said, moving Peach's head back slightly. "What's wrong with you?"
"You seem so sad," Peach added.
Yoshi shook his head, looking at the floor.
"Nothing. Nothing's wrong. But nothing's right either."
"…Okay…something definitely happened," Marth said, finally getting up. He walked over to Yoshi and patted him on the head. "Did someone beat you?"
"No," Yoshi said, sounding bored.
"Somebody steal something from you?"
"Not that I know of."
"Do you need a hug?" asked Peach.
"No thanks. I'm just gonna go to my room and…think about why I exist. Maybe see what happens if I end that." Yoshi slowly walked upstairs while Marth and Peach tried to figure out what he meant.
Marth eventually gave up.
"Ah, well. Now where we- holy crap, he's gonna kill himself. Um…" Marth quickly stood up. "I'm sorry to do this, but…I gotta stop him. I can't let Master Hand see one of his workers dead."
"…What?"
Marth sighed annoyedly, grabbed Peach's crown off of her head, and knocked her out with it. It looked like she was sleeping on the couch. Genius. About 20 seconds after Marth was done being proud of himself, he ran upstairs to try his hardest to cheer up Yoshi enough so he wouldn't commit suicide. But since he wasn't paying attention, he didn't notice Yoshi falling down the stairs and crashing into him.
At the bottom of the stairs, Yoshi was on top of Marth, and Samus was on top of Yoshi.
"Sandwich!" she declared.
Marth groaned. "Ouch…"
"It's good to see that you're having fun," said Yoshi.
Samus laughed.
"You're the lettuce, cause you're green!" she said.
"So what is this, a vegetarian sandwich?" Marth said, straining words.
Samus giggled.
"Can you GET OFF!" Marth said as loud as possible (which wasn't very loud). Samus got off of Yoshi, and he got off of Marth, and Marth got off of…the floor. Yeah.
"Yoshi! Why are you so sad?" asked Marth.
"Too many reasons, the most recent being that I was tackled by a mature-looking woman a minute ago."
Samus smiled.
"But the main reason is…well, I guess I've always been depressed for as long as I can remember. Maybe I was born with it."
"Or maybe…" Marth snapped his fingers. "You need ice cream. C'mon." Marth grabbed Yoshi's hand and dragged him to the kitchen. Yoshi didn't bother resisting.
"I have nothing better to do. As usual," he said.
When they reached the kitchen, Marth hurriedly open the freezer. There was no ice cream left.
"Shit…" He walked over to the statue and picked it up, then went back to the freezer. "I broke up with Peach for no reason…"
"Can I go do nothing now?" asked Yoshi.
"I got something for you to do. Stand right there." Marth pointed to the right side of the fridge. Yoshi complied.
"Stick your head out a little."
Yoshi complied.
"You thirsty?" Marth grabbed the handle.
"A little…like it matt-"
Bam!
Yoshi was out like a light.
Idiot…depressed idiot…
Marth grabbed Yoshi by his feet and began dragging him to the front of the couch, in front of Peach. (Yoshi naps on the floor from time to time, so this wasn't unusual.) Shortly after that, he heard the back door opening.
Now who is it? Marth put the statue under the couch where the person wouldn't see it.
Link walked in.
"Hey," he said.
"What's going on?" Marth said casually.
"What happened?" Link rubbed his head. "The last thing I remember, I looked at that statue's mirror. How did I get to the courtyard?"
Damn. What do I say? Wait. That's how you make them normal again!
"It's fun and useful!"
"What?" asked Link.
"Oh…just…never mind, okay?"
"Why are the other two out there?"
Uh…
Marth brilliantly shrugged.
"Yeah, my head hurts too much to think about it. I'm going to take a little rest."
Marth nodded, and after Link started going upstairs, Marth sighed.
"That was close…no, wait…"
Marth ran after Link.
"No! Don't do it!"
"Do what? Sleep?"
The two heard moaning coming from Mario's room. Link stared at Marth.
"Um…"
"Why now? Why?" Link ran to Mario's room with Marth following close behind. He kicked the door open, and there was Zelda and Mario under Mario's covers, and Samus sitting on a chair in the corner.
"They said I need to wait," she said, then whispered, "What do you think they're doing under there?"
"Hey…if it's any consolation, I made out with his girlfriend."
Link glared at Marth, saying nothing.
"Just saying."
Done. Gotta wait for the continuation. Sorry.