Disclaimer: GA is not mind. It's sad . . .really.
Sorry it has taken so long to update this. It is not my fault, that is the fault of the website. It's been down or something and not letting me update at all. Had it let me, this would have come exactly when I promised.
But I'm updating now! So yay!
And warning, this chapter (and the next one) will be super cheesy. Lol. But after all the angst they've gone through, I think they deserve some cheesy happiness.
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Derek's POV:
I stood over the barbecue, watching my daughter run through my yard, her laughter ringing through my head. She was with her friends, girls whose mothers or fathers were co workers of mine and Mer's. Mer. I look over at where she stands, with her friends, setting the picnic table up so all the children could go eat. She looked up and we caught each other's eyes, smiled.
Life is good.
This is what I had been waiting for, looking for. The kind of life I had grown up with. It was back with me.
Hell, I hope I don't mess it up again. I had a knack at messing it up.
And today, I may.
"What's cookin, good lookin?" a familiar soft voice says beside me. I had not noticed she had left the others and came to stand by me.
"Did you just?" I look at Meredith, finding myself speechless at the awful line she had just used.
"Yeah. I did. I blame it on the nice weather, makes me toxic."
"You're happy."
"I'm happy."
I smile at her and lean over to give her a quick kiss on the cheek. I can't screw this up this time. "Stick around when everyone leaves, I have a gift for Emily."
"Well, it is her birthday, gifts come with the territory."
"I don't want others around. Just our family."
"Our family." Meredith repeats. Our family. It felt good saying it, even better hearing her say it.
"I've been meaning to ask, what's Em's last name?"
"Shepherd."
"You gave her my name?"
"Yes." Meredith says, blushing a beautiful shade of pink. "I didn't mean to. I wanted to say Grey. I meant to say Grey. Shepherd came out."
"Thank you."
Meredith smiled, it lit up the already sunny day. (AN: I warned it was going to be cheesy, lol). "Thanks yourself. Emily's always had parties inside our apartment, this party is, well amazing. You outdid yourself."
"She's my daughter."
"She's your daughter."
The rest of the party goes smoothly, the girls finally stop running to eat their hotdogs, and then Emily opens all her gifts. Mainly Barbie dolls. And a little toy doctor's kit. Izzie leads them in some games, as the rest of us lean back and enjoy the view of the lake and the sounds of happy children.
"Fine, I'll marry you," Cristina turns to Burke who's sitting beside me. "But I don't want any of those. Look what it turns you into." She gestures to Meredith and I, who are holding hands tightly. Mer has a stupid grin on her face. I imagine mine matches.
Burke just smiles.
The party ended just as the sun began to set, and everyone tired and sticky piled in cars to go home. By the time the stars had come out, only my family was left.
My family.
"Thanks for the party Daddy!" Emily says reaching for my hand.
"No problem, Princess."
"It was so much fun! And all my friends though you lived in the coolest place. They don't have this much grass."
"You dad does have a lot of grass." Meredith sounds tired.
"I'm tired." Emily says with a yawn.
"Okay, honey, we can go home soon."
"Can daddy come with us?"
"Of course, Daddy can come with us."
"But before we head home, sweetie, I have one more surprise for you. It's in the trailer."
I've traveled here and everywhere followin' my job
I've seen the paintings from the air, brushed by the hand of God
The mountains and the canyons reach from sea to shining sea
But I can't wait to get back home to the one He made for me
'Cause anywhere I'll ever go and anywhere I've been
Nothin' takes my breath away like my front porch looking in.
Meredith's POV:
Tired. I'm used to being tired, my job leaves me tired. Staying up all night, unable to sleep as thoughts of Derek fill me head leaves me tired. Having all of Emily's friends to Derek's house for a birthday party leaves me tired. A good tired, but tired.
Thinking of Derek coming home with me, giving me a quick kiss goodnight and sleeping on my couch left me feeling exhausted.
I looked over at Derek, where he was leading our daughter into the trailer. He looked nervous. Derek didn't get nervous.
"Oh my god Daddy! It's so perfect!" I rushed in behind them, wondering exactly what was so perfect.
In front of me was a very large wooden doll house. The kind that every little girl dreams about owning but never actually gets. The kind that seems magical and perfect. It was a dollhouse that represented it's own little world.
"Wow." It was all I could manage to say.
"I didn't know what to get you, and your aunts in New York suggested a doll house."
"I have aunts in New York? Like Aunt Izzie and Cristina?"
"Just like them. They're my sisters."
Emily doesn't really pay attention to his answer, she had become to busy peaking through windows and examining the rooms that filled the house. She looked enchanted.
"Where did you get that?" I asked Derek as I moved to stand beside him.
"I built it."
"You built it?" Em asked, sounding as surprised as I felt.
"With some help from Preston, George and Alex. Yeah."
"Wow, Derek."
"Mommy, can I play with it?"
"Of course you can."
Derek walked over and grabbed two beers from his fridge and sat down on the couch, leaning his head to indicate that I should join him. So I did.
"You really shouldn't have, Der."
"Why not?"
"It's so extravagant and big. You don't have to spoil her Derek, you really don't."
"Meredith, she's my daughter. And for the first five years of her life I wasn't there. That's not my fault, but it is my job to make it up to her. This dollhouse, it's for all her birthdays that I missed."
I feel tears in my eyes as I think of those birthdays. The small gathering of coworkers that came over to celebrate her first. The same gathering again for her second. Her third was the first real party for her, with friends from her daycare coming and playing all day. Fourth and fifth were much the same. And every year I'd excuse myself for a moment, so I could sneak off to my bedroom and dig up an old picture of her father, and cry for all that he was missing.
He was never going to miss anything again.
We sat in silence for a while, sipping our beers and watching our daughter play through the house, discovering all the rooms and all the different places she could play. The look of wonder on her face was one that I had only seen once before, soon after we moved here and I had decided that she was ready to find out more about being a doctor and had taken her to see one of Derek's surgeries. Her father had a way of enchanting her.
Her father had a way of enchanting me.
Finishing his drink, Derek leaned back further and threw his arm around me. Not even thinking I cuddled in further, getting comfortable against him, enjoying the comfort of feeling his body against my own. I thought of it all. Of everything that we had shared together after our first meeting, all the fun we had had. And then the heartache that soon followed when Addison had shown up. The exam room. Finding out I was pregnant and running away. The pain of living five years without him, not knowing what he was doing or who he was with. And coming back, finding out that everything, from the small touches, small glances, everything, was still there.
Nothing had changed. Nothing ever would.
"I love you." I say.
Shit, I had been thinking it, thinking it since I didn't remember when. Those three words had been on my mind since long before Addison had even entered the picture. Those three words had never disappeared. But I hadn't planned on saying them out loud.
I look up at him.
He looks down at me, smiling in his McDreamy way. He hugs me tighter to him and remains silent. Smiling.
"By the way Derek, how are we going to fit that thing into the car to get it my place?" I say, wanting to break up what could become an awkward silence.
"Mer, I think it's about time we take a walk." With that he's up and reaching out his hand to bring me with him.
"What about Em?" I say, gesturing to the little girl that's to enthralled in her gift to even think of moving.
"We're staying on my land, not going that far. She'll be fine."
"Okay."
"Yes. Walk. Now."
The nervous, un-Derek-like look is back on his face.
Hahaha. . . .cliffhanger! Don't you all just love me? Why does McDreamy want to take Meredith for a walk? Why is he nervous?
And I like this chapter, and there's not too much in depth explaining I can do. Remember after Damage Case, when Shonda wrote in her blog and said on the podcast that there wasn't much that could be said, because anything she could say would give away things for the upcoming week? Yeah it's like that.
And honestly . . .I don't even know if there is a couch in that trailer. I don't think there is. Where the hell would it be? But I liked the image of Derek and Meredith cuddling on the couch again. It's so normal and couply. So for this chapter, there is a couch.
I loved how Meredith just slipped I love you. Hehehe.
And that is all I can say. You know my drill . . .read, love, review.
Oh, before you all beg and plea and threaten me to update . . .my boyfriend has a ball game again tonight, at 9. And then I will be coming home and I will write the next and final chapter then. I promise. Promise. Promise. Promise. (seriously . . .as of tomorrow I'm busy all weekend because a close friend is getting married on Friday so I won't make you wait, it will be tonight)