Wow! All I have to say is that I have the MOST AMAZING readers in the world! You guys are seriously awesome! All of your positive reviews made me feel SO much better…therefore, I am continuing my story! YAY! I know this chapter isn't the BEST but I didn't want to leave you guys hanging too long.

Ruthie woke up the next morning. She was dreading today so much. Ten years to the day, Mary, Carlos, and her nephews were killed. She felt tears stream down her face and got out of bed. She washed her face, throwing on a pair of jeans and a comfortable t-shirt. She sighed, and went downstairs, wiping the tears away, and trying to look happy for her daughters.

"Good morning mommy." They said, happily as they ate breakfast.

"Hi girls." She said quietly. "What's wrong mommy?" Allie asked, seeing Ruthie's puffy red eyes and tear stained cheeks.

"I'm ok." she said as Martin wrapped his arms around her. "Girls? We'll be back in a minute. Maddie? Keep an eye on your sisters."
"Ok dad." She said, and they continued eating.

Martin and Ruthie walked up to their room, and she began to cry even harder into Martin's shoulder.

"Shhh. Baby…it's ok." He rubbed her back and kissed her head.

"I still can't believe they're gone." She sobbed.

"I know honey." He whispered, holding her as tight as he could.

"There's that memorial today. I don't know if I can get through it."
"Babe, I know you can. You're the strongest woman I know."
"If that's true than why do I feel so weak?" she asked, her voice breaking and she walked in the bathroom.

The phone rang, and Martin leaned over and answered it.
"Hello?" he said, rubbing his eyes.
"Hey." Kevin said on the other line. "How's the wife?"
"She's probably the same as yours. How is she?"
"Not doing great. My mom's in town…she's taking the kids until the memorial."
"Yeah…I was going to ask my dad to do the same. They don't want to see her like this."
"That's exactly what I was thinking…and none of them remember her…well the ones that were here when she was…"
"Yeah…I know what you mean."

"I think we should do something this afternoon…try to get them to think about something else for a while."
"Good idea. Who knows if it'll work but hey, we can try!"
"Ok. call me once you guys drop the kids off or they get picked up. Whavever." He laughed. "Just call us."
"Ok Kev. Talk to you later."
"Bye Martin." He said, hanging up.

He dialed his dad's phone number.
"Hello?" A voice asked.
"Hey dad."
"Martin! How are you?"
"Not so great…considering…"
"Yeah. How's Ruthie?"
"She's hanging in there, but still not good. I just feel terrible dad. I'm supposed to be the strong one…protect her."
"Martin…after 10 years of marriage I thought you would've figured it out by now. There's no way to protect her from everything. But you're sure doing a great job of being there for her through all of this."
"Thanks dad. I needed that. Anyways, does grandpa feel like hanging out with his granddaughters today?"
"Sure."
"Ruthie and I just….need time alone today." He sighed.
"Yeah. I know what you mean."
"Are you going to the memorial?" Martin asked.

"Sure am. I'll just bring them when I come to the church."
"Ok. Sounds great."
"That's what I'll do then. I'll pick them up in a half an hour. Love ya son."
"Ok. Love you too. Bye dad." He said, and hung up just as Ruthie came out of the bathroom.

"Who was that?"
"My dad. He's taking the kids until the memorial."
"Ok." she said, sitting in the bed, and Martin wrapped his arms around her.
"I'm hungry." She said, rubbing her hands on her stomach.

"That was random." He said.

"Your wife and your baby are very hungry. So I suggest you feed us." She said, laughing.

"Yes ma'am." He said, and Ruthie got up and went downstairs to eat. Their three daughters came upstairs and sat on Martin and Ruthie's bed.
"What's wrong with mommy?" Maddie asked.
"Yeah. Why is she so sad?" Allie asked.

"Well girls…You remember Aunt Mary and Uncle Carlos that I told you about?"
"Yeah…"
"Well, today it has been 10 years since they died."
"Oh." The girls said sadly.
"I don't want mommy to be sad." Lauren said

"Me either honey." He said, pulling his daughter into a hug.

"What can we do?" Maddie asked.

"Well…can you guys go over to grandpa's house today? Then we're going to the church tonight."

"Grandpa Brewer?" Allie asked excitedly.

"Yup. Can you go over there until we go to church? I think mommy wants to be alone."
"She doesn't love us?" Lauren asked, sadly.

"Oh no honey! She loves you very much! She just needs some time to herself today. Ok? do you understand?"
"Yes daddy." She said, smiling once again, and they walked out and got in the car, and Martin drove them to his dad's house.

Ruthie came back upstairs, and sat on the bed, and put in a CD. The song that began to play was one that really helped her through their death, and she was hoping it would help her through the day.

Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start
But its now that I feel your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

I still believe in your faithfulness
I still believe in your truth
I still believe in your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Though the questions still fog up my mind
With promises I still seem to bear
Even when answers slowly unwind
It's my heart I see you prepare
But its now, that I feel, your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

I still believe in your faithfulness
I still believe in your truth
I still believe in your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Well the only place I can go is into your arms
Where I throw to you my feeble prayers well in brokenness
I can see that this was your will for me
Help me to know that you are near

I still believe in your faithfulness
I still believe in your truth
I still believe in your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Ruthie quietly sang the last part, tears coming down her cheeks once again. Martin walked in and saw his wife. He smiled sympathetically, and walked over, wrapping his arms tightly around her.

"It's ok honey."
"I just feel terrible Martin. I need to be strong…for my parents. For our daughters…"
"You don't need to be strong for anyone."
"I'm just…I'm stronger than this. I know I am. I'm just breaking inside and I don't know what to do."
He held her close, kissing her head. "I love you Ruthie."
"I love you too Martin." She wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry."
"For what? You have nothing to be sorry about."
"I've just been so…emotional all day."
"Well it's a sad day. I feel bad…I didn't know Mary that well and I wish I did."
"She really was a great sister…despite everything with her and Carlos divorcing and her abandoning Charlie…she really was a great person. I just wish you knew her better."
"I know. I do too." He said, as they laid on the bed.
"You're an amazing woman you know that?" he asked her, stroking her hair.

"Yeah right." She chuckled.

"I'm serious. You are the best wife and mother…I wouldn't trade these past 10 years for anything. I love you Mrs. Brewer."
"I love you too baby." She said, kissing him.

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I've gone through
The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You
Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you, oh Lord
My only shelter from the storm
But instead I draw closer through these times
So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of
The dark clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what's a little rain
So I pray
Holy, holy, holy

Ok...yeah that chapter sucks lol. That chapter was kinda short…sorry guys! I know there are 2 songs and I know that's a lot…but at that Christian music festival, those were 2 songs that really stuck in my head and I thought…'hey! I should use those in my next chapter!' so I did…I hope you like it! PLEASE R&R! suggestions? Anyone? What do you want to see in the story?