Hello this is the one of the three authors again. This is the one that owns the Fanfiction account. Don't ask why or how me and my friends thought of these ideas...we just do cuz we're silly like that.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. J. K. Rowling does.

In our last episode, we left Harry badmouthing Frosted Flakes and Nike, and Ron trying to calm him down. Now we are in the Gryffindor common room, with a special guest. Let's give it up to...LORD VOLDEMORT!

Voldemort: Hello my name is Voldemort...wait, Voldemort...umm, let me ponder on this curious matter for a moment.

Harry: This could take a while! So why not go get some snacks and a drink and we'll return soon after he sorts it out!

Voldemort: Nobody asked you, Potter! (raises wand) Avada...no, no BAD Voldemort. Remember, your therapist said if you wanted to get rid of these constant headaches you'll need to dispose of your bad and evil ways. Now. Where were we again?

Harry: You were TRYING to remember your own last name. You know, that happened to me just last episode! What a coincidence. Maybe if you just ask the announcer or something...

Voldemort: SILENCE! Oops, that sort of slipped out. Hey! I just remember now! I don't have a last name when I'm using VOLDEMORT! You can thank my mother for that...

Oh anyways, I'm so glad to be a special guest here. It's the nicest thing anybody has ever done to me in my entire life. (pulls out a hanky and blows nose) It's...so touching. ANYWAYS, you know Larry, right? The kid with messy black hair, lightning bolt shaped scar about this high. Well, yeah, me and Larry go WAAAAAY back.

Harry: MY NAME'S NOT LARRY! But yeah, we go WAAAAAAAY back. Especially for him, considering he's WAAAAAAY older than me. By like 50 years or something...

Voldemort: I'm not that fing old! I'm like...32. But yeah we go WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY back. Sometimes me and Barry here get together on the weekends to eat tea and crumpets in the Leaky Cauldron.

Harry: Yeah, once Tom here ate so much, he swelled up like an elephant!

Voldemort: (in a sarcastic tone) SURE, sure I did. Kids these days, just don't understand anything.

Harry: Wait! It was bigger than an elephant! More like a Muggle's blimp!

Voldemort: DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU, POTTER!

Harry: Oh no you didn't! You did not just say that to me! Nobody ever uses that tone of voice with me! You can't kick me out of my own common room!

Voldemort: How much do you wanna bet on that?

Harry: Looks like somebody's not paying attention to the recommendations of their therapist!

Voldemort: THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD IT UP TO HERE!

Harry and Lord Voldemort have started a vicious catfight around the common room, destroying everything that dares to get in their way. Oh look, now Harry's hair has caught on fire and Voldemort is rolling around on the floor laughing like a maniac. Harry is desperately trying to put his hair out while Voldemort gets a bucket of popcorn and an extra large soda to watch the entertaining show. Finally Harry puts his hair out. He hardly has any left, and the whole common room is burned to ashes.

Announcer: This broadcast is brought to you by Darry Motter, Rom Tiddle, and Hubba Bubba Max Bubble Gum. The whole new kind of bubble.

Voldemort and Harry start attacking the announcer.