A/n- Riley is my friend's character and you'll find out who she is soon. Please read her fanfics! Her pen name is Cora Pembroke.
Disclaimer: (Haven't done one of these in a while) Yeah, yeah, yeah... I think you can tell that I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho... But I do own the character, Avari and my friend J-chan owns Riley... and the Shmoo! (You'll find out what I mean later!)
Chapter Eight: The Bipolar Spirit Guide
Thud! Avari hit the floor of Koenma's office. This time she landed on her butt, whereas last time she had managed to land on her feet. Yusuke fell into the room shortly after her. Luckily, this time he didn't land on her, but next to her instead. Both of them got up off the marbled floor and looked over at the miniature ruler, who was seated in his enormous, leather chair behind a massive desk. Stacks of papers a mile high were piled on the desk. How did Koenma get through all that paper work?
"You really need to get a softer landing," Avari said as she rubbed her aching back.
"Hello Avari, Yusuke," Koenma said, sitting up a little straighter.
"Yeah, yeah. Tell us what the hell it is you want so we can leave," Yusuke said impatiently.
"I'll get straight to it," Koenma said. "I need Avari to retrieve an artifact known as the Moon Stone Necklace for me and bring it back here where it belongs. You can help out too, Yusuke. I will have a portal waiting for you at 7 o'clock in Genkai's courtyard tomorrow night. Here are some more details." Koenma handed Avari a piece of paper with a map and notes on it.
"I will do that," Avari said, glancing down at the paper in her hand.
All of the sudden, the door that was behind them flew open and everyone looked over. In walked a girl about Avari's age, who had reddish brown hair and stunning blue eyes. She was dressed in a light blue kimono and had a wide grin spread across her face.
"Avi-chan!" she shrieked as she ran over to Avari and glomped her. "I haven't seen you in forever!"
"Uhh... Nice to see you, too... Ri-san," Avari choked as the girl squeezed her to death. Yusuke just backed away from the entire scene as a sweat drop formed on his forehead.
"I missed you so much! You have no idea how bored I've been since you left!" she said, still clinging to Avari.
"Do you think you could let me go now, Riley?" Avari said, trying to breathe.
"Oh. Well I'm sorry!" the girl said angrily. She let go of Avari, who was gasping for oxygen. "It's not my fault I haven't heard from you for 2 weeks!"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on a second there, Riley!" Avari said, backing away from her. "You're more bipolar than ever." Riley crossed her arms and pouted at hearing these words.
"Who the hell is she?" Yusuke interrupted. "And what the fudge does bipolar mean?"
"This is Riley. She's a spirit guide, like Botan. I met her 5 years ago when I stopped her from robbing a safe here in Spirit World and I helped her get the job," Avari explained to Yusuke. "And, to put it simply, bipolar means that she is constantly PMSing and has massive mood swings. She can be happy one second and angry at the world the next."
"Hey! You didn't have to explain it like that, bitch!" Riley yelled.
"Can you feel the love?" Avari said sarcastically.
"Can you two please take this outside! I have a lot of work to get done!" Koenma yelled in frustration.
"We're going, we're going!" Yusuke yelled back as he pushed the two girls out the door.
Out in the hall, Riley got a smile back on her face and glomped Avari again. Avari just stood their motionless and in shock as her psychotic friend hugged her to death.
"I still can't believe you're here in Spirit World!" Ri-san said. She let Avari go. Turning her back to Yusuke and leaning her head to Avari's ear, she whispered, "Who's the hottie over there?"
"That's Yusuke," Avari answered quietly. She looked back at Yusuke, who was looking at them funny.
"Oh! Is he your boy toy? He looks like he wants to rape you," Riley whispered, poking Avari with her elbow. "Wait, what am I thinking! You can't rape the willing!"
"We're going out, if that's what you mean?" Avari whispered back.
Riley squealed, causing Yusuke to look at them in an extra funny way. "I knew you'd get a boyfriend sooner or later!" she yelled out loud. Avari blushed, knowing Yusuke had definitely heard that. "So, who wants to go chillax in my room?" Riley smiled a big, innocent smile and giggled nervously as she looked back at Yusuke.
Avari and Yusuke agreed to go hang out with Riley for awhile. When they reached her room, which was a complete pig sty with clothes, empty dishes and other various things strewn everywhere, a strange creature came running over to greet them.
The creature was very, umm, interesting. It had rabbit ears, a fox tail, and was covered in purple fur. It kept saying "Shmoo!" the whole time, which got annoying after awhile.
"Ahh! What the hell is that thing?" Yusuke yelled, sounding very surprised.
"That's Lulu, my shmoo. Isn't she darling?" Riley said as she patted Lulu's head. "Just keep in mind that she acts like a cat, but thinks she's a dog."
"Oo-o-ok then," Yusuke said. He sat down on the couch that Riley had in her room. Avari sat down next to him and Riley sat down on her bed.
"What have you been up to, Avi-chan?" Riley said, looking over at Avari.
"Nothing much. Yusuke and I went to the arcade today and..." Avari stopped talking when Riley suddenly laid down on her bed and started staring up at the ceiling. "Umm... Are you okay, Riley?" Avari said looking at Riley. O.o
"That is one sexy ceiling!" Riley yelled.
Avari went over to Riley's bed and laid down on it next to her. She looked up at the ceiling as well and said, "It's so sexy, I could rape it! Can I make sweet love to it?" Yusuke just sat there, confused beyond measure.
"You can, after I do," Riley said.
"No, me first! What have you been smoking?" Avari argued.
"The question is; what am I not smoking?" Riley said with a giggle.
"You two must be on everything! You're weirder than my mom when she's drunk!" Yusuke called out.
Riley got up from her bed and ran over to her dresser. On top of it was a red notebook, which she grabbed and went back over to the bed.
"Oh my gosh! Is that what I think it is?" Avari surprised.
"Sure is. It's the ever famous, rape-able list!" Riley cried out. Yusuke had just about had it with the two of them acting so idiotic. She leaned over in Avari's ear again and said,"Can we add the sex god over there?"
"Sure! May I do the honors?" Avari said, grabbing a pen.
"Of course! He's yours to rape! Anytime, anywhere," Riley said.
Avari wrote Yusuke's name in the book, that was filled with at least 100 other guys. After she wrote his name in it, Avari looked at all the other names listed.
"Whoa! You still have Rick Ledge's name in here?" Avari called out.
"Hell yeah! He was some hot stuff!" Riley yelled. "I swear he was my 'sole' mate. Get it?" Riley pointed to the sole of her shoe. "'Sole' mates! Since we had the same shoes." Avari and Riley laughed.
"What the fudge?" Yusuke said, who was completely oblivious to what was going on.
"Oh, nothing! Go put this back over there, Ri-san," Avari said, shutting and handing the notebook back to Riley.
"Will do," Riley said. She put it back in its rightful spot, on top of the oak dresser, and sat back down next to Avari. "Do you guys wanna go keyacking?" Riley asked excitedly.
"What the hell is keyacking? Is that French for kinky?" Avari said before bursting out laughing. Both the girls laughed until their sides hurt, while Yusuke just sat there, giving them his usual "WTF?" look. O.o
Finally, the two girls settled down and regained their composure. Avari sighed and let out one last giggle. She looked over at Riley's clock. The hands of the clock said that it was 6:30. Avari's eyed widened.
"Holy Smucker's Jelly! I didn't know it was so late," Avari said, not believing the time. "We really need to get back to Genkai's. It was really nice getting to goof off with you, Riley. We should do this more often."
"I see how it is," Riley said angrily. "You just want to get away from me because you just hate me that much, don't you?"
"Bye, Ri-san!" Avari said, completely ignoring what Riley had just said. "Bye, Lu Lu." The shmoo replied with, well, a "Shmoo!" and Avari pushed Yusuke out the door with her.
Out in the hallway, Yusuke let out an exceedingly long sigh of relief. Being in a room with two psychopathic girls, one having a bipolar disorder, could be very stressful and took a lot out of you.
"Damn! How can you stand that girl?" Yusuke said.
"She's my best friend! Do you have a problem with that?" Avari argued.
"Uhh...no..." Yusuke said. He put his hands up in defense and the second sweat drop of the day formed on his head. 'She's acting a little bipolar herself... I hope Riley didn't rub off on her too much,' Yusuke thought to himself.
"Okay. Good," Avari said with a smile. She took Yusuke's hand and went to Koenma's office.
In his office, they had Koenma make them a portal back to Genkai's. The two teens walked through the portal, hand in hand. Seconds later, as they fell out of the swirling vortex, they found themselves back in the courtyard in front of the temple.
"Thanks for a nice day, Yusuke. I haven't had that much fun in awhile," Avari said happily. They were now standing on the porch of the temple and standing right outside the front door (or shoji screen door).
"No problem. I had fun, too," Yusuke said back, with a smile. "I'll come over tomorrow morning and walk you to school."
"Sounds good," Avari said as she beamed.
They both just stood there for a moment, staring into each other's eyes. Slowly, the space between their faces became less and less. Soon, they were too close and before you knew it, their lips were touching.
Just as Avari was about to put her arms around Yusuke's neck to deepen the kiss, the door in front of them opened. Instantaneously, they broke apart and looked over to see Genkai in the doorway.
"Busted!" Yusuke said, but then laughed.
"Uh...Hi, Aunt Genkai," Avari said nervously.
Genkai didn't say anything. She just stood their and chuckled. "It's late. Avari will see you in the morning," Genkai said, as she motioned for Avari to go inside. "Training's tomorrow after school, dimwit. Don't be late."
"Yeah, yeah. I know already," Yusuke said carelessly. "See ya, Avari. Grandma." He gave a little wave and started walking off down the stairs and home.
"Looks like you had a good time, Avi-chan," Genkai said with another chuckle.
"Shut up, Aunt Genkai," Avari said, as she turned pink and shut the shoji screen door. "I'm going to bed."
"Okay. Good night, Avi-chan," Genkai called after Avari, who was already half way down the hall.
"Good night, Aunt Genkai," Avari yelled back. She opened the door to her room and got into her pajamas.
That night, she slept soundly and happily as she dreamed of all the fun things she had done with Yusuke.
-...and that's it! This chapter was a little crazy, but I had a lot of fun writing it. After a stressful week of school and stuff, I call it my 'comic relief'. . Most of the funny stuff was inspired by jokes my friends and I have. Hope you liked it! Review please!
-starts talking in deep, announcer-like voice- How will Avari's mission go? Will she succeed in getting the Moon Stone Necklace for Koenma? What exciting things are planned to happen in the future? Find out in the next episode of... The Power Locked Within!