The corridors of the Galactica were dimly lit as Ellen stumbled from the transport bay to her rack or whatever the frak those battlestar types called their bedrooms. She swayed down to the passage humming a Caprican pop song to herself. The Athena's Porn Stars had been a great group, just about to hit the big time, it was only a shame they'd been on planet when the Cylons attacked.
She banged into a wall and spent a minute giggling before she audibally shushed herself. Ambrosia was wonderful but that Alliance drink, friskey, she thought it was called, had made her warm and relaxed and suddenly a dingy old battlestar was the best place in any galaxy to be.
She pushed herself off the bulkhead and continued on her way, this time humming some Alliance drinking song they'd all been singing earlier in the evening. She swayed down the corridor humming and giggling and had just opened her mouth to belt out a particularly ribald chorus when something clanged to the floor behind her. She jumped and turned, her back banging painfully against a bulkhead.
She stood there, frozen, her heart pounding in her chest. She stared down an almost hidden side corridor, certain that at any moment a Cylon would come clamping towards her. The shadows moved and Ellen scrabbled against the bulkhead behind her, unconsciously making little mewing noises. Seconds passed and her heart began to slow as nothing came out of the shadows to kill her. As the blood stopped pounding in her ears she could hear the very non-mechanical noises that were filtering towards her. There were moans and familiar sucking, wet noises and when the desperately groping couple stumbled out of their corner and right under a flickering light Ellen felt hilarious laughter well up and spill over into the corridor.
Gaius Baltar whipped around, his face swiftly shifting from startled to scared to slightly contemptuous. The curvy redhead with him looked even less amused, if that were possible.
"Congratulations sweetie," Ellen gasped out between chortles. "We're really moving up in the galaxy, aren't we?"
"What are you babbling about?" Baltar asked peevishly, his face flushed in a dangerous combination of anger and embarrassment, a love bite swelling on his neck.
"You know he won't make an honest woman of you?" Ellen asked, ignoring the vice-president completely.
"Well, obviously." The redhead replied acerbically, her tone made Baltar's eyes widen. He cast her the most deliciously befuddled look that Ellen had ever seen. The idea of the kind of sweet and innocent routine the girl must have used on him sent her into another paroxysm of glee.
"That will be quite enough, Mrs. Tigh." Balter gritted, his manly pride obviously offended. "You've both had quite enough laughter at my expense." With that he swept out of the corridor, muttering quietly to himself. He was the very picture of a jilted, slightly schizophrenic, 16 year-old.
"Oh honey, don't be that way." Ellen yelled after him. The way he tensed his shoulders without deigning to turn around sent her straight into another fit of the giggles.
She turned back towards the side corridor only to be met by one of the most violent slaps she had ever received and what could only be an obscenity in that strange language the Alliance types were always breaking into.
"You gorram whisky-sodden fuck!" the redhead snarled, her voice didn't rise above a whisper and for the first time Ellen feared this little melodrama would end badly. "I will not let you screw this up for me."
Ellen smiled and patted her on the shoulder. "Don't worry, girly-girl." She leaned in closer. "Trust me, that innocent lost lamb act would've gotten you one evening but the manipulating dominatrix will have him coming back for more. I'm sure you can figure out where to take it from here."
Ellen grinned and winked as a slow, calculating look slid over the girl's face, a look Ellen recognized far too well from her own mirror. She turned away, pleased with herself and the hand she'd had in this particular drama.
"Oh," she started and turned back. "You might want to see about bringing your pretty little husband along for the ride. I'd bet that he's more up for it then you'd think."
The sly, wicked grin that spread across the redhead's face was the most delicious thing Ellen had seen in ages.
Ellen hummed to herself as she swayed down the hallway. Not much was better then sex but she had a feeling that the fallout from this evening would come awfully frakking close