Note: Jason "Zaratan" Jones is a 27 year old male with an obsession and talent for writing Kim Possible fanfiction. johnrie18 is an ancient, dark force trapped deep with the inferno in a sea of frozen sin, anxiously awaiting the day where he may escape to unleash his wrath upon the world.
What do they have in common? Well, starting this fall, they'll be sharing the same roof… as roommates! Coming to a local network near you.
Second note: This fic does not take place within the continuity of either of its author's respective works of fanfiction, nor is it meant to take place in continuity with the fourth season of Kim Possible, assuming one is actually in production.
Enjoy.
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"Ron. Ron." Kim tried to get Ron's attention, even as she struggled to keep her own. "We came all this way, don't you want to see this."
"I'm busy." Even as Ron Stoppable spoke, his lips danced gently up and down the side of Kim's neck, frequently causing Kim to gasp ever so slightly, though she struggled not to show it.
"We flew all this way, dooh… don't you want to see this?" Kim nearly lost her breath again as Ron's lips tickled a delicate spot on her neck that she hadn't known even existed.
"It's a clock." Ron replied simply as he continued his massage.
"It's Big Ben!"
"It's a giant clock." He simplified.
"It's a historic monument. It's over 200 feet tall, and almost a hundred and fifty years. Are you even paying attention?" Kim countered with statistics taken from her guide, all the while she was trying desperately to keep her leg muscles from melting and her body temperature from rising.
"I'm trying, but you keep distracting me over that clock." Ron replied playfully.
"It's not a…oooh." Kim moaned contently, her eyes lifting up into the back of their sockets as Ron's lips finally worked their way up to their intended target. That was her spot, her spot, right on the right side of her neck. And she melted like jelly every time Ron kissed it. With all her strength of will, she pushed herself away in order to resist the urge to jump Ron right in broad daylight.
"Ok, mad dog horn dog, that's enough of that." Kim tried to keep herself from blushing.
"Tease." Ron replied.
"Flirt." Kim didn't miss a beat.
"Hottie."
"Hunk. Now come on, don't you want to take in the sights while we are here?"
"KP, far as I am concerned, I'm looking at the most beautiful sight in the whole country." Ron smiled widely, his gaze meeting Kim's directly.
Kim couldn't resist a wide grin as she moved over to Ron, placing her arms around his neck. "When did you get to be such a sweet talker?"
"About the same time you decided to spend our time together staring a giant clock." Ron teased.
"It's a historic monument." Kim added even as she playfully blew his hair over his face.
Ron let out a sigh before pulling back his right sleeve. "See this KP? This is my Snowman Hank digital watch. It has the time for every time zone, it's waterproof and its alarm chimes the Snowman Hank theme song. Very cool, but I wouldn't sell tickets. Now, if we were standing in front of the World's Largest Cheese wheel…"
"… which you melted." Kim raised her eyebrow in slight triumph.
"A necessary sacrifice." Ron replied, causing Kim to stick out her tongue at him. Ron merely responded by playfully pushing his girlfriend back, prompting the two to begin laughing as they rough housed right in front of the Palace of Westminster. Fellow tourists and onlookers could not help but look on in confusion and bewilderment as Kim quickly secured Ron in a headlock.
"Ahh, come on KP. We're in public." Ron whined even as he struggled for freedom to no avail against Kim's iron hold.
"Not till you give up. Say it Stoppable." Kim's grin was wide as her tone became deeper, in imitation of a super villain.
"Uncle! Uncle!" Ron cried out as his hands flailed wildly in the air to signal his surrender.
"Sorry, that doesn't work. Say Mommie!" Kim was having way too much fun to surrender her position so quickly.
"Oh that's it! Monkey Tickle!" Ron's hands shot straight for Kim's sides, tickling her with merciless fury, causing her to cry out in laughter.
"Ron… Ron stop!" Kim managed to gasp between laughter, barely able to breathe. "I give, I give!" Kim surrendered as she released her hold over Ron's neck allowing him to taste free air again.
"Boo-yah! Victory is mine." Even as Ron's head rose up, his hands, which had been at Kim's sides, now moved around her waist, pulling her close to him. "And now to claim my prize."
Ron's lips met Kim's readily. The two stood together in each other's arms for what seemed like an eternity. This was what their trip was really all about. Just the two of them, with no one else to take care of or look out for and not another care in the world.
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"Ronald, have you finished packing yet?"
"Almost dad."
Ron's room was a mess of clothes for all seasons scattered about as Ron frantically tried to make sure there was nothing left behind that he might need on the trip. Balancing what he could or would need against what he could afford to fit in together was an important task, and Ron was still deciding which set of swim trunks to pack.
Gerald Stoppable entered the room just as his son finished with the last of his things.
"All set son?"
"Just about. Is mom ready to go?" Ron asked as he lifted his backpack up over his shoulders.
"Your mother's getting the car started. Now, I assume you and Kim have enough money for everything?"
"Yes dad." Ron rolled his eyes as his father asked the same question again.
"And Kim is bringing her Kimmunicator in case of emergency."
"Yes dad."
"And you brought protection for when the two of you are together?"
"Yes d…. DAD!" Ron shouted, angry for having been deceived so easily.
"Relax son. I'm not going to get into 'the talk' again." Ron's father assured him.
"Ohthankyousweetmercifulgod!" Ron added to himself mentally.
"However, I do want to make sure I give you this before you head off." Gerald reached into his back pocket and retrieved an envelope which he handed to his son.
Ron's eyes nearly burst as he looked inside.
"Dad, I told you KP and I brought enough money!"
"I know, I know. Just in case you two want to stay somewhere nicer than a hostel or eat someplace a little more formal along your trip. Think of it as an extra graduation present." Gerald smiled wide with obvious pride at his son.
"Gee, thanks dad." Ron smiled back as he and his father hugged, enjoying their brief father/son moment.
"Now, you're sure you have everything?" Gerald asked finally.
Ron did a quick tally in his head. Backpack: check. Clothes: check. Cash: double check
Ron then reached into his pocket for a quick feel.
"Yeah dad. I got everything I'll need."
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"This can't be happening. This cannot be happening." Ron reiterated, even as Kim took the last of the pictures for the day.
Curiosity finally got the better of Kim, prompting her to look over to Ron, gawking at a news stand and the front picture of the paper. Even Rufus had taken it upon himself, hearing Ron's reaction, to pop out of his resting place in Ron's pants pocket and scamper up to his master's shoulder to see what the commotion was over.
Kim had to throw her hand over her mouth to restrain herself from breaking out laughing at the picture of one of the palace guards, his eyes wide open with a look of shock and disbelief in his face, his hands moving across his uniform grabbing at an unseen force, as a tiny pink head popped out of his neck.
"Huh ho. Score!" Rufus declared proudly as he admired his immortalized handiwork.
"This can't be happening. We were just there!" Ron argued rhetorically.
"Hot off the presses." Kim mused as she reached into her pocket, retrieving a few pence to pay for the paper.
"That should totally be my face bursting out of that guard's uniform. You cheated!" Ron exclaimed as he turned to face Rufus, whose only response was to spit a raspberry back at Ron.
"Kim Possible. Ron Stoppable." A voice announced from behind the pair. The duo quickly turned about to see a tall, well groomed figure sporting simple jeans and a shirt. It took Kim several seconds to recognize him outside of his usual formal attire.
"Your majesty!" Kim exclaimed as she curtsied in proper fashion.
"Prince Edward?" Ron had a hard time accepting the Prince in such casual attire, much less wandering around outside without some kind of formal escort or several dozen photographers stalking behind him. "Whoa cool! How are you doing?" Ron asked, displaying none of the humility Kim exhibited as he walked up to shake the Prince's hand.
"Well, much better ever since you and Miss Possible saved my royal jet from being hijacked by that hideous goon."
"Yeah, we call him Monkey Fist, but hideous goon works too. So what are you doing out of the palace in this year's casual?"
Kim could not help but smile and snicker at Ron's casualness and confidence with one of the most important people in the entire country. The memories of Ron as a socially insecure, shy young boy seemed more like a distant dream than a forgotten part of his life.
"Believe it or not, it's actually a lot easier to avoid the press when you're not running around in formal royal attire. Plus, I have a double covering for me who should have just been seen entering the palace not five minutes ago."
"Is that safe though? I mean, someone could still recognize you walking in public." Kim added in.
"I never leave home without protection." At this, the Prince motioned to two men standing somewhat inconspicuously upon inspection just a few yards down the sidewalk, both largely built with thick black glasses, though also disguised in casual attire. "Mum's orders."
"Wow, for a Prince you're really sneaky. Badical."
"How did you find us?" Kim asked.
"Well, I am the Prince and this is London. As you Americans say, I have a few strings I can pull around here." The prince replied slightly immodestly.
"But how could you know that we were in London?"
"Well, do correct me if I am wrong, but this is your pink rodent that's sticking out of one of my palace guards." The prince replied with a look of amusement on his face as he indicated to the picture on the front page of the paper in Kim's hands.
"Oh." Kim's face burned a deep red. "So what brings you out of the palace?"
"Well, this is somewhat awkward and on short notice I admit, but I need a date."
Both Kim and Ron's eyes shot wide open.
"You see, the Royal family is hosting an Open Tournament this afternoon to raise money for a new medical center to be opened right here in London. Obviously, as host I must attend, and in order to satisfy etiquette, as well as the mobs of hideous photographers and scrutinizing journalists, I'm expected to bring a guest, preferably someone of… fame and international recognition. Unfortunately, I've been rather hard pressed to find someone who fits those qualifications and is available and the tournament is this afternoon." The prince explained uneasily.
"And… you want me to be your date?" Kim asked uneasily. She could sense the vibrations caused by Ron's teeth gritting together in burning rage.
"Well, both of you actually."
"You what?" Ron was immediately disarmed.
"Prince Edward with the world famous Team Possible as his guests. I dare say that should satisfy even the most anxious of the press." Edward explained simply.
"Oh." Kim tried not to give herself away as she let out an enormous sigh of relief.
"Now I know these matters are deadly dull, but please hear me out. You'd only need be there long enough to answer one or two questions from the press, pose for a few pictures, stay long enough for everyone to see us all together in attendance, and you can leave. I'd be happy to make it up to you for your troubles. Say, a night at the palace as my guests since you'll be in town?"
Kim and Ron looked at each other in shock before turning back to the prince.
"We could actually spend the night at the royal palace?" Kim asked slowly in case she had misunderstood the prince's proposal.
"Badical. Slumber party with the royal family!" Ron proclaimed. "So, when is this tournament?"
"Uhmm, in less than fifteen minutes actually." The Prince answered rather embarrassedly.
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Kim had been in more battles for her life than most war veterans. She had been surrounded by ninjas, muscular goons of all shapes and sizes, super powered villains and a variety of different mind controlled animals, many of which nature had never intended.
Sadly, none of those had ever prepared her for battling through a mob of reporters and photographers as she, Ron and the Prince pulled in on royal carriage. Almost immediately after stepping out, she had been swarmed by reporters and cameras pushing and pulling her all at once in every different direction while simultaneously being blinded by a merciless bombardment of camera flashes, even though the sun was still high in the sky.
Kim could feel Ron and Edward both move to take her by the arms and guide her through the swarming mob. As she regained her composure, she thought she heard the Prince apologize for the mob's behavior, but his voice was completely drowned out by the roar of dozens upon dozens of random questions being shouted simultaneously. It took all her concentration to just look around, maintaining a smile that she would have killed to preserve for her class pictures as she walked with her one arm wrapped affectionately around Ron, while Edward took her spare hand merely to guide as etiquette deemed.
Once inside, the trio was escorted to an elegantly decorated room, where numerous tables and chairs were laid about for guests to enjoy and sit about, talking to each other. A formal buffet, which was scarcely attended too, was off to the side and a fully stocked and somewhat crowded bar lay in the corner of the room. On the other side of the room were several large open doors leading out onto a series of connected balconies that overlooked the greens were the match would be held. Kim had been certain that she would be relieved to make it inside, yet she felt even more awkward once she took a look at the company she was in.
Royalty, heads of state, famous actors and actresses of the stage and screen, and any number of other people she assumed to be either rich or politically influential, or both, many of whom she had saved before and all of whom were dressed very formally.
Kim and Ron, in contrast, had not really been expecting to be formal guests of anyone, and so had thus not really packed accordingly when preparing for their trip. On short notice, they had been unable to find something suitable for the pair to wear. Edward had actually suggested that the team wear their mission gear, which, while not really recognized by etiquette, would likely be accepted given the team's reputation and lack of alternate options.
She could already feel her appearance being carefully scrutinized by dozens of eyes that seemed to conveniently just wander away from her whenever she noticed them. She immediately gazed into the nearest reflective surface she could find to see if her hair was at least presentable.
As she moved, she suddenly realized she was dragging Ron with her, becoming just aware of how tightly she had been clenching on to him.
"KP. You ok?"
"Not really." She admitted even as she let out a weak smile to anyone who might still be looking at her. "I really just want to get out of here."
"Kim Possible! Good to see you again." A soft voice spoke humbly.
"Mr. Nakasumi!"
"Hey, good to see you again." Ron moved to shake the Japanese toy creator's hand, but remembered his own time spent in Japan and decided upon a humble bow, which was returned in kind. "Pst. Don't worry dude, you're secret is still safe with me." Ron whispered with a wink.
"It is good to see you again. I am still much in your debt for saving my life from that annoyingly loud tiny man last month."
"No big. We had been looking for Dementor anyway. Happy to be of help."
"I must confess, I did not realize you to be such a fan of croquet."
"Well, anything for a good cause." Kim replied.
"Wait, croquet?" Ron asked. "As in long, slow, life sapping, eye closing mallet taping croquet?"
Kim tried not to appear impressed with the accuracy of Ron's description as she lightly tapped him on the side.
"Quite so, I fear. Do not tell anyone, but I usually work on my newest toy designs while attending these functions. It's how I can convince my stockholders to let me attend." Nakasumi confided.
"No problem dude. I'll take it the grave with me." Ron assured.
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"Really Granny, it was no big."
"I still can't thank you enough for what you did to recover our hydro dough gun from that weird blue guy. If you're ever in Texas, you be sure to stop by and we'll treat you and your friend to our top secret testing facility of our new recipe. It's going to revolutionize the baking industry."
Kim let out a sigh as she waved goodbye. That made the ninth person to have recognized her and thanked her for her help in the past. It certainly took the edge off to know that she had quite a few friends, and influential ones at that, among the crowd. However, now that the anxiousness of the occasion had worn off, Kim was forced to admit that she was almost terminally bored. She could have been happy enough to just sneak off to some overlooked table with Ron and just chat with him until it would be convenient for the pair to slip away.
She looked over to see Ron and Rufus at such a table, both trying to come up with new and inventive ways to stack the table's plates, glasses and silver ware atop each other without spilling over. Each time she returned to them, she had been called away to shake hands with some one else who had wanted to thank her for helping them.
"You two having fun?" Kim asked as she sat down next to Ron.
"Sure, except he's cheating." Ron accused as Rufus spit out. "How about you KP?"
"About as much fun as meeting my dad's boss from work." Kim sighed as she leaned back in her chair.
"I talked to Edward. He says he can have someone escort us out as soon as the match starts and no one's looking."
Kim was about to voice her relief when a loud explosion thundered from outside. Kim and Ron both jumped up, shaking the table and knocking over Rufus' most recent tower of table items.
The duo had to push their way past the anxious guests crowding in order to get a clear view of what was happening outside.
"Cro'quet! Cro'quet!" A thick, all too familiar accent cried out across the course, bellowing even over the panicked screams of the numerous people running for cover. "Tis a sport for wee lasses. Now golf, there be a sport for a man! FORE!" Duff Killigan cried out as he dropped a small white ball to the ground only to take aim and swing, the projectile flying straight for the reception room where Kim and Ron watched.