Author's Note: Apologies for the slight delay. Hope you enjoy.
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This was rapidly, in Kim Possible's mind, turning out to be the worst vacation that she had ever been on. Getting captured and stunned unconscious by Shego and her goons was icing on the cake, but coming too, only to find herself secured, hands cuffed and spread by a bar, back against Ron who was similarly shackled, dangling by a lone chain over of a pit of some green, foul smelling, bubbling and sizzling substance… well that was just the cherry on top of all of it.
Kim tried to wriggle her legs to see if see she could at least feel for the contents of her pockets. Much to her chagrin, it felt as if her equipment had all been removed. She took a moment to scan her surroundings, finally coming upon a nearby table far out of reach where it looked like her pack and equipment, along with Ron's had been laid.
"Not our finest moment, is it?"
The voice took Kim by surprise. She hadn't even been aware that he was conscious.
"Ron, are you ok?"
Ron just chuckled dryly before answering. "Well KP, I'm currently chained over a pit of something I assume is acid or toxic waste or some other similarly foul smelling goo, I can't find Rufus, and the odds are pretty good that in a minute or two, some mad scientist who can never remember my name is going to walk in with his super powered hit woman, taunt us, and then lower us to our doom. Other then that, I've been better."
Kim felt her throat sink into her stomach. Right, she reminded herself, he still hates me.
"Ron, we really need to talk." Kim pleaded.
Ron merely returned his dry chuckle. "Really KP, your choice of timing is just…"
"Perfect, actually." An eerily familiar voice sent a silent groan through the pair. "We were just about to conquer the world, and we're absolutely thrilled that you both could make it."
"Oh good, this is just what I needed." Ron's voice didn't falter in the least.
"Kim Possible." Dr. Drakken exclaimed with delight.
"Why do all our super villains seem glad to see us for some reason?" Ron was on a roll.
"And….you… whose name is unimportant and escapes me at the moment anyway. You know who you are!" Drakken added uneasily, waving his finger annoyed at Ron.
"I know that you know my name." Ron shot a dirty look at Drakken.
"Yes, well I won't have too for much longer, now will I?" Drakken retorted triumphantly.
"Kids had to go and spoil all my fun." Shego's voice carried itself into the room as the villain walked in, disappointment all over her face. "Was hoping those brats would put up some kind of fight, maybe make things a little interesting, give me a decent work out. Instead, they just gave up and left me to fetch their little rodent who I found sneaking around in the ventilation system."
At this, Shego held up a length of chain with a sole manacle locked around Rufus' entire upper frame.
"Oooh, sorry." Rufus uttered.
Ron's face fell even more at the sight.
"So, now that I've got you where I want you, let me hear it." Drakken asked, placing his hand over his ear as if to facilitate listening.
Kim and Ron barely had the strength to look at each other in confusion before turning back to Drakken.
"Oh come on. What's the matter with you two? Aren't you going to ask me what I'm up to, tell me that I'll never get away with it… you know, the usual."
"If you know what we're going to say, why do you have to hear it?" Kim asked.
"It's proper villainous form." Drakken explained clearly. "Really, after all this time, don't you know anything about it? We banter, there's some laughs after words, mostly from the villains, and then I lower you to your doom. Haven't you been paying attention all these years?"
Ron and Kim just sighed.
"Yeah we get the basics." Kim replied dryly.
"You know, I'm starting to think that your hearts aren't really in this. If you're going to do this, you should at least try to do it right." Drakken replied with a degree of hurt.
Ron sighed before finally bringing himself to ask, seeing no other alternative. "Ok, so what's your big plan this time?"
"Ha, I'll never tell you." Drakken shot back, crossing his arms triumphantly as he turned away from them.
"Great." Ron added, satisfied.
"Oh all right, since you asked." Drakken went on, turning around and producing a fair sized, cylindrical, yellow container of some sort. The container's contents seemed to glow a bright purple hue. "Kim Possible… and …. other…" Drakken added dismissively "I present to you… oblivioum!"
There was a slight pause as Kim and Ron just sighed.
"I had to ask."
"He appreciates it, I'm sure." Kim added frankly.
"Oblivioum is the most recent discovery from the proud people that brought us the Pans-Dimensional Vortex Inducer. It's just one of the recently discovered Anti-Elements."
"Is he serious?" Kim forced herself, in sheer desperation, to ask Shego.
"More often than I care to think about." Shego added with only a touch of humor, just a touch.
"You see, an Anti-Element is produced whenever an alternate dimension dies or collapses. Because of its unique properties…" Drakken was quickly cut off as Shego stepped in front of him.
"Basically, the stuff makes weapons grade plutonium look like highway concrete. The small little particle he's got there could wipe out an entire continent."
"Shego," Drakken's voice took on the tone of a small child who'd been upstaged while showing off to his parents. "You're ruining my big moment!"
"How many other anti-elements are there?" Ron asked, really not wanting to know, but deciding he couldn't stand any more whining from Drakken. As it was, he was pretty sure that Drakken was just making this up anyway.
"Well, there's oblivioum, ragnorkium, apocolyte, armaggedium, destructium, annihlium…" Drakken attempted to keep count with his fingers.
"Dude, who the heck comes up with these names? What, were they picked at random from choices created by fifth grade classes across the US?" Ron had to ask.
"…erradican…"
"Dr. D, no one cares." Shego informed plainly.
"…corruptium…"
"Make him stop, please. Torture us, whatever you have to do, just make him stop." Ron begged.
"…lucifite, ooh I was so hoping we could find some of that."
"Ok you know what Dr. D, you go make your little bomb, I'll handle the heroes." Shego forcibly pushed Dr. Drakken's still pensive form out of the room as he continued his recount.
"They theorize that's there another one that they've already named cthulhuite, but if you ask me, they just made that one up to get extra funding." Drakken went on all the way as he was pushed out of the room.
Shego stormed back in as the metal door closed behind her overly informed employer, moving over to the table where their gear lay.
"You know Kimmie; I've always wondered where you do your shopping." Shego mused as she began rummaging through Kim's pack, pulling out various tools and devices. "I mean seriously, some of this stuff you just cannot find, not even on EBay."
As Ron noticed Shego scavenging through their packs, he suddenly realized something, and as he did, his face lost all color. Quickly, frantically, he began struggling against his metal restraints, yet the solid steel would not bend.
"Oh, what's the matter; sidekick got all the best toys?" Shego asked with a delighted tone upon noting the reaction in Ron. "Well then, maybe I'll just take a peek for myself."
Kim suddenly realized what Ron might suddenly be so anxious over, and she lost her breath uttering a silent prayer that Shego didn't find it.
"Let's see here, overdue history homework… from three years ago!" Shego noted with astonishment as she looked at the date before dismissing the papers and continuing her search. "Grapple gun that doesn't work, oh gross!" Shego exclaimed as she picked up something that Ron identified as having once been a left over naco. Whatever it was now was a matter best left to expert biologists to debate.
"Seriously sidekick, clean this thing out once a year." Shego said even as she pinched her nostrils to avoid the overpower odor. "Hey, what's this?"
Ron's eyes went wide as Shego pulled the small purple box out of the bag. Shego's curious fingers quickly opened the box, prompting a gasp from Shego.
"This… this is an en-en-engagement ring." Shego's voice was a shocked whisper. "You were actually going to propose?"
Shego turned to look at Kim and Ron dangling over the pit of impending doom. Their grim, solemn expressions told Shego the whole story.
"He… already proposed… and she said… no!"
The skies split, the earth cracked in half, and mountains were laid to rubble by the thunderous roar of Shego's laugher as the green and black clad villain fell to the floor, her hands at her side.
"OH THANK YOU!" Shego exclaimed, barely able to hold her sadistic glee. "I know now! I have seen the light!" The pale woman exclaimed through her mad cackles. "There is a god, there really is… and he hates you Ron Stoppable." Shego proclaimed loudly as she redoubled her laughter, almost sending it out in waves of tiny, razors that shred their way through Ron.
"Shut up." Kim's words were barely a whisper, but they carried all the force and determination of a force of nature.
"Oh, I never thought I would live to see this moment." Shego gasped, trying to regain her breath. "I mean I dreamed and I prayed, but never did I actually expect… hahahaha!" Shego doubled back over, this time in tears.
"Shut up." Kim's words gathered force as she spoke.
"Wait, wait. Please, please tell me that you're planning to replace him with that artsy loser me and Dr. D saw you with while he was trying that stupid flower embarrassment trick of his." Shego tried to wipe the tears from her eyes. "Oh, I'd pay money to see that."
"Shut up!" Josh Mankey couldn't have been further from Kim's mind. The thought of strangling Shego however, now that was a subject very near and dear to her focus.
"After all the times I've tried to tell Dr. D we need to break you two up, you go and do it for us!" Shego spit out in pure glee. "Now I can die happy. I really can. I don't even care whether Dr. D blows up a country or himself now, my life is complete."
"SHEGO, SHUT UP OR I SWEAR…" Kim finally couldn't take it anymore.
"Yeah yeah, swear all you like princess." Shego let out casually as she worked her way over to a lever in the side of the lair. As she pulled down on it, Kim and Ron could feel the chain that they were attached to loosen and begin to lower down into the pit.
"You know," Shego began, "I wish I could say how much I really respected you as an opponent and all that jazz, but the truth is, I really don't like either of you, and I never did. Buh-bye."
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It is said that people in near death situations often experience a peculiar phenomenon. Apparently, in a brief instant, the sum total of their life flashes before their eyes, often giving them a clear or new perspective on their outlook on life in general or at least that is what's supposed to happen.
Kim had always dismissed this as some weird urban legend or myth. In all the countless times that she had faced death square in the eye, she had certainly never experienced anything even remotely similar to this supposed spiritual slide show.
Until today.
As Kim and Ron were slowly lowered into the bubbling pond of green, each passing second marked by the clanking sound of the chain as it lowered them another notch, Kim's life flashed before her very eyes, and she saw…
"Ron! Ron, we have to get out of here." Kim's voice came alive with determination and focus.
"Ok then. Well why don't I just grab the keys." Ron's voice lacked Kim's enthusiasm.
"Ron Stoppable, you listen to me. I am not going to die here today, and if you think you are, I will personally drag you out of this mess so that I can beat you myself." Kim was willing to go to the end of the earth for Ron Stoppable, but even she was only able to go so far, and he was rapidly approaching that limit.
"As motivational speeches go KP, that wasn't one of your better."
"Ron!"
"Alright fine." Ron conceded. As much as Ron felt like wading around in a pool of self pity, he couldn't allow himself to drag Kim down with him. "What's your plan?"
"Swing with me." Kim kicked her legs up together in an effort to get some momentum as she attempted to swing the chain that the two of them dangled from. She let out a slight smile as she could feel Ron move exactly in flow with her own actions. The two pulled and kicked and twisted their own frames in an attempt to swing themselves to one side of the pit walls.
"When we hit the wall, jump up across to the other side."
The radius of the pit was relatively small. A design flaw that Kim fully planned on capitalizing. Kim felt herself swing with greater and greater momentum until she was finally able to press her feet up against the wall of the pit.
"Now."
Kim pressed up with all her strength, leaping upwards and outwards with Ron attached to her, lifting his feet up so as to reduce resistance. They gained perhaps half a foot before coming up and across the pit.
Ron followed Kim's example perfectly. Against the imperfect pit wall, he angled his feet at the precise degree, leaping up and across the pit with all his strength, gaining maybe another precious few inches.
"That's it. Keep going."
Back and forth the pair moved. One way, then the other, a few inches at a time, in rapid succession.
Last one. Kim made the jump with the remains of her rapidly fading strength, but her legs felt like they were going to give out on them. Luckily, she could feel Ron catch the top with his own two feet. For five seconds, Kim dangled over the edge of the pit while Ron struggled to keep their balance. Finally, Ron was able to bring himself over and Kim along with him. The two stood safe atop.
"The table." Kim directed.
The two awkwardly made their way over as Kim bent over within the confines of her restraints before finally retrieving her laser lipstick. It took only a few seconds to cut herself and Ron free. She then moved over to the wall from where Rufus hung and cut him free.
As she did so, Ron took the moment to re-stuff his pack, taking a pained second to hold the purple box in his hand before pocking it.
"So now what?" Ron asked. "We go save the world?"
No, not yet. Kim couldn't wait another minute longer. She knew this wasn't really the place, but it was the time. It had to be now.
"Ron, I am so sorry about last night. I'm… I wasn't ready for marriage Ron. I'm sorry, but I'm just not."
Ron could feel his strength leave his already exhausted body all over again. He couldn't understand it. He was sure he was dead, yet for some reason he just wouldn't fall over.
"That doesn't excuse my reaction though." Kim went on. "What I said to you was unforgivable. I was scared, but that doesn't change that I hurt you when I had no right to. I don't know if even I can but if you give me a chance, I swear I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you."
"Kim…" Ron tried to say something, anything, but he couldn't. Luckily, Kim spared him from the awkwardness.
"Ron, right now I need you focused. I can't do this without you, I never could." She added with a smile as she placed her hand to his cheek. The very sensation, the feel of her smooth fingers against his skin sent waves of pure bliss through Ron's body and was almost enough to warm his heart again. "We have to go save the world, and when we're done, after we've given Shego and Drakken the payback they deserve, then I promise, we are going to have a long talk."
Ron could feel a tear burn down the side of his face. Just one. It caused him to take in an extra breath though, regaining his bearings for a moment.
"Let's do this."
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Author's Note: Just one chapter to go. Hang with me everyone, you're doing great.