A/N:

If you're wondering why I have a few extra days in the story before Roswaal returns to the manor, it's because I always found it a little convenient that Subaru didn't have any time to act suspicious and in general be a dumbass before being judged and allowed into the home by Roswaal. This way, I feel, gives Subaru a few extra days of being a guest in limbo instead of immediately being accepted in as either a guest or butler. In turn, it also gives Roswaal an opportunity to gather information on Subaru through his staff. Guests often stayed days at a time at aristocrats' grounds (although admittedly often in guesthouses) before meeting them, accompanied by the waiting staff, in the days when travel took so long, and since aristocratic politics were so boringly interesting and interestingly boring, they sometimes played a game of cat and mouse on gathering what they could learn about the other through the experience of either being a waiting guest or a host with an observant staff.

With that said, let's move forward with the longest chapter of the first arc so far.

Chapter VI: Roswaal Returns

On the first day, Rem and Subaru were able to meet after lunch, unlike during the first time they completed that part of their resets. With the justification that Subaru wanted to make sure Rem was resting well after tiring herself out during the fight with Elsa, Subaru asked to be excused and then took her by the hand to bring her to the guestroom. Neither Rem nor Subaru saw Emilia narrow her eyes at the two of them and watch them leave the room, though she was silent. She sent a suspicious look at Ram, who bowed and began to speak...

When they reached Subaru's guestroom, Subaru pulled out the scroll of notes they had taken during their overview of his resets and then laid it out on the desk on the opposite side of the room from his bed. He took the chair there and felt strangely self-conscious when Rem stepped up beside him to stand over his right shoulder and look over the notes with him. He put his hand on the desk and turned his head up to look at her.

"We know that we need to talk through things to be okay. Talking about stuff makes them better, right? So how do we start?" he asked. The blue oni ruffled her hands into her blouse and straightened it nervously, something he noticed she did when she didn't really know how to answer and didn't want to disappoint. Still, she eventually came up with what she wanted to say.

"When Rem and Ram need to talk, they always start at the most important first," she said more resolutely than she felt internally. She wasn't exactly sure if that was the best approach here, but it was the best idea she had. Subaru seemed to catch on, though.

"The most important... emotionally, right? We need to talk about the things that pull at our hearts the most. Right, Rem-rin, I know where we have to start!" he said, happier than Rem had expected. She leaned forward in interest. He pointed one finger up and said matter-of-factly, "When I woke up with you!"

"When... Subaru-kun woke up with Rem?" she asked confusedly. Hadn't they woken up with one another multiple times in the last week alone? Time was confusing when she thought about the resets, Rem noticed.

"When I woke up with you! Alone, for the first time. At least, I think for the first time. I passed out because of the fight with those wolf thingies and you were holding my hand. Do you remember?" Subaru explained. She felt her eyes grow wide as she realized what he was talking about, and she let out a light 'oh' at the idea that this is what they should talk about first. He quickly elaborated, "You said the most important first, right? This is something that's important to both of us and I thought we should start... you know... happy? Before we talk about... everything else, ya know?"

"... Hai," she said simply, feeling fuzzy inside again. It was weird for her to feel this way at all, much less so often in such a short amount of time, but it seemed to be the feeling that Subaru brought out in her. He had said that it was a happy and important memory not just for her, but for him too, right? That meant something, right? She didn't want to read to far into it, but...

"Sit on the bed, Rem-rin. Let's chat!"

"So Rem has been sneaking around in the city when she goes out to pick up deliveries to meet a... a boy? He said he was new in town and looking for a place to live," Emilia said disbelievingly. That was so unlike Rem, so irresponsibly impulsive, that she couldn't help but smell something off about the entire thing, but Rem had admitted to it and seemed to genuinely care for the boy named Subaru that had shown up to help her in that bar the day before. And that reminded Emilia that she had caught Rem right in the middle of sneaking around that day, too! Suddenly she wasn't so sure about her suspicion that something else was going on, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she was missing something.

"The annoyance may have stayed in an inn or even on the street, Emilia-sama. He looks like the right type of vagrant," Ram helpfully suggested. The pink-haired oni obviously wasn't fond of the idea of someone romancing her blue-haired counterpart and had taken to bitterness at the thought of the idiot- Subaru, that is; she concluded that her sister was being an idiot about this as well, but she would never say it to Rem's face.

"That may be. We shall have to see what Roswaal-sama thinks when he returns to the manor in a few days' time. Until then, we trust Rem's judgment. Aside from admitting to sneaking during her duties, she has never given us a reason to distrust her. Your sister is trustworthy. We just can't tell if he is," Emilia pointed out. As much as Ram didn't want to disagree, it was her duty to point out everything about the situation, so she pursed her lips.

"Barasu saved you in the city and shared comfort with Rem when she was vulnerable. As incompetent and suspicious as he is, I can't see why he would do either of those things if he wanted to hurt you," she begrudgingly pointed out. Emilia hummed in unsure thought.

"Unless he wanted to get close for something else. Some other reason," she said, sighing out harshly as she realized the implication, "and the best reason that we have is that he actually cares for her. He obviously does at least outwardly, but he looks at all of us almost as fondly. There's something we're missing that Rem knows, but..."

"Rem refuses to talk about him without him in the room," Rem almost spat out. Emilia looked at her in shock. Ever since she had known them, Rem and Ram had shared everything with one another, even embarrassing and hurtful things that tested their roles at the manor. For Rem to hide something from Ram was huge. Emilia cursed inside of her head. Whoever this Subaru was, he was either an expert at acting carefree and genuinely nice to conceal malicious intent, or he was actually some sort of saint for Rem to withhold things from her sister.

Roswaal couldn't come home soon enough, in her opinion.

"It was the first time that I really noticed you as a person," he said. She didn't know how to take that, so instead she decided to keep quiet and look at him as he continued to think. They had gone over the event of the wolf attack in the forest in his memory and then compared it to her own recollection, and then they started talking about feelings. It was refreshing and new for her, being able to talk about these things with someone other than her sister. They communicated using the language of respect, amazement, awe, and warmth, and that led them to the time he woke up with her hand in his.

"I mean, I always knew that you were a person. I'd always seen you as one, I think. I mean... What I mean is that it was the first time I realized I knew you and not some idea of you. Before then, you had always been the hard worker, the cute maid, the unstoppable and awesome fighting machine. You know... things that were part of you that I saw one at a time but never as a whole. That day, when I woke up and we talked, I didn't just see those things. I saw Rem-rin," he continued, and Rem could have flown over the moon with how high she felt she was floating. Subaru was terrible with words most of the time, but when it really mattered to someone he magically found exactly the right thing to say, just like he somehow (eventually) found exactly the right thing to do whenever the people around him truly needed his help.

"I... Rem sees..." she said, almost foregoing her semi-playful verbal tic, "Subaru-kun has a way with words."

The happiness of her voice caused him to chuckle in sudden nervousness caused by a flutter in his chest and he brought his hand up to scratch the back of his head, "I mean, not really. Nothing special at all! I just say what pops into my head, you know? I had a similar thing with Emilia-t... with Emilia when she started playing politics in the capital. It was an entirely new side of her that I didn't expect."

...

Rem stared at him flatly for a few seconds before internally forgiving him. He would ruin the moment by talking about another girl right after sweeping her off her feet with the sweetest thing she'd ever heard someone say about her in her entire life. That was just the way that Subaru worked. Still, after a few seconds of consideration, she reevaluated and came to the conclusion that when he admitted it was just what came to him to say and then took the '-tan' off Emilia's name, it was actually a good thing for her and sweet in a clumsy, completely incompetent sort of way. He was clearly rethinking things and she felt like she was suddenly on the same level as Emilia. It was a good feeling even though she felt like she was somehow betraying the poor half-elf.

"What? Is there something on my face?"

Oh. She forgot that she had been staring at him.

"It was when Rem saw Subaru-kun's fire," she said. He didn't know how to take that, so instead he decided to keep quiet and look at her as she continued to think, "Subaru-kun had always been so spiritful, but when he put himself in danger to save Rem and Ram, Rem saw him turn into someone else. He turned into a different person," she finished.

"I don't know what you mean by turning into someone else, but I think I know what you're talking about. When you went all awesome and started hitting those dogs with your flail thing and you saw me with Ram, you got protective of her. You were out of control, but you still protected the person you cared about. You were two people at once. Is it something like that?" Subaru asked. Rem nodded affirmatively.

"Subaru-kun was always nice, but when he fought instead of Rem, he let Rem and Ram know that he cared about them, and then he was out of control. Rem knew she couldn't stop him from fighting even though it was dangerous for him. Rem... I liked that version of Subaru-kun," she admitted shyly. It was true. He had completely ignored any suggestion that he should let her handle the wolves by herself, instead tossing himself into danger to protect her even though she was the better fighter.

"I thought you didn't like it when I sacrificed myself for the people in the manor?" Subaru asked, confused.

"Rem doesn't like it when Subaru-kun treats himself like he is expendable!" she shot back, "Subaru-kun was different that day. He wasn't sacrificing himself because his life didn't mean something. He was sacrificing himself because it did."

Subaru felt the last sentence hit him in the stomach like a sucker punch and all of his breath left him. He had been sacrificing himself because he viewed his life as meaningless compared to the people around him, he recalled, but that day... That day, he felt different. Rem and Ram were in danger, the village and its children were under threat, he knew what he had to do, and yet... He didn't take on risks because he thought his life was worthless. No, he had protected Rem and Ram and fought to sheer exhaustion because he was fighting the curse. He didn't want to die. His friends meant something to him and in that moment of fighting his life had meaning.

"Rem-rin, I want to learn how to fight," he said so suddenly that it caused Rem to let out a soft 'Eh?' in surprise.

"Subaru-kun wants to learn how to fight?" she asked a bit louder than she intended. He winced.

"Not because I want to take risks. Because I don't want to be useless anymore. I want to know enough to survive, not just die and reset until I get it right. I want my life to mean something," he stated. He had a small amount of sword experience, fast moves, and some barely useful magic and that was it. He needed to be more, to be stronger.

Rem looked at him for a few moments in silence, before she gave him a resolved nod with a bit of happy fire in her eyes.

"When Roswaal-sama returns, Subaru will learn."

The rest of the days continued in much the same vein as the first, though none of their talks were nearly as meaningful between the two of them as that one had been. They had gone over a couple of resets before that one, like the times Subaru had died of the curse in his sleep. They still hadn't talked about those resets. The thought of discussing how they felt about those resets caused both of them to feel empty inside and they fled from the subject whenever they got too close to it. It was important, though, so they quickly ran out of excuses to avoid it by the time their fourth session was over.

Subaru joined Rem (rather than Ram, this time) in taking care of upkeep of the manor as an unofficial helper for the time being. Last time, they hadn't had a reason to spend time together on chores without seeming suspicious, but they felt they had the opportunity this time. While Ram had done her best to show Subaru how to do his expected duties when he worked with her, trailing Rem and having her, internally amused though she was, show him what he was doing wrong at great length made him improve by long strides even just in the short few days they worked together. He had absolutely no talent as a butler or any form of servant, really, but he made up for it with hard work and determination to learn.

The time passed quickly for them as both of them were floating high above the clouds. Rem had let out the stress of her part of the situation when she and Subaru had woken up back in his bed after she passed out on the grounds, and Subaru was able to revel in a few lazy days where he had someone who got him and knew everything about his situation that he could think to tell. He still hadn't told Rem that he was technically not from her world, but he wasn't sure how he would even begin that conversation, so he supposed he would jump in when the opportunity presented itself.

The time passed so quickly for the both of them, in fact, that neither of them noticed that the fifth and final day had sneaked up on them from behind. Breakfast on the fifth day came with little noise. Subaru wasn't allowed in the kitchens yet, so he was left to wait outside the kitchen with one foot hitched up onto the wall and his chin down to his chest as he waited for Rem and Ram to finish up. Rem always left the kitchens looking tired and he knew that Ram pressed her constantly for information or at least a deeper explanation about him, but it didn't cause her anxiety. She found herself instead fighting feelings of indignance on Subaru's behalf, which she had to quell because they were directed at her sister of all people and that made her feel indignant on her behalf... against herself. Subaru did his best to cheer her up during their morning and afternoon routines after meals.

Today, they had reluctantly agreed to finally have an opening- but not final- conversation about the first time one of those resets happened. Rem was in a subdued mood when he met her before breakfast preparation began and he couldn't blame her.

Still, they had a plan. They had time to work through things too, right?

Subaru was startled from his droopy-headed contemplation when Rem and Ram pushed through the doors and started preparing the table, only something was off. He caught Rem's eye and she looked uncomfortable, and then he noticed that this time the lord's seat was being served. It was at that moment that a tall, lanky, pale man with a lopsided star over one eye stepped into the room, bedraggled in the gaudiest mix of a gentleman's attire and a street magician's costume. Ram and Rem bowed, and Emilia and Beatrice entered just a moment later.

"Neeeeee, who do we have here, hmmmmmmm?"