"So, after adding on your damage from your Bottom Boy going to Hell and getting Trench Foot," said Kaiba. "You're down to 7300 life points."
"And you're down to 7000 life points," said Yugi smugly. "Let's see you come back from that, Kaiba."
"Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you Yugi?" said Kaiba, somewhat annoyed, before realising what he had in his hand. "Actually, you know what? That Neil Patrick Harris card is pretty overpowered. Why don't I get rid of it?"
"Go ahead," said Yugi. "He'll just go to Hell and start treating anyone with Trench Foot, basically making the Hell dimension useless."
"I didn't say I was going to kill him immediately," said Kaiba, smirking. "Before I kill him, I need to hit him with this card." Kaiba pulled a white card out of his hand and slammed it down on the desk. "Gay conversion therapy. Now Neil Patrick Harris is straight."
Yugi gasped in shock. "N…no…" he said, unable to believe what he was seeing.
"Yes, that's right Yugi," said Kaiba, grin spreading widely across his face. "And, because he hasn't done anything bad, now if he dies, he goes to heaven, where he can't treat your dead cards."
"Damn it…" said Yugi, frantically looking for something he could do.
"And now, Jennifer Lawrence: KILL NEIL PATRICK HARRIS!" yelled Kaiba excitedly.
"NOO!" yelled Yugi, as Jennifer Lawrence fired an arrow at Neil Patrick Harris, killing him easily. Yugi's life points dropped by 1000, bringing him down to 6300.
"Oh, you have no idea how long I've been waiting to do that," said Kaiba smugly. "Now there's nothing stopping me from draining you of the rest of your life points as I wipe out the rest of your monsters. Now, have your turn. Try and stop me."
Yugi sat in stunned silence for a moment. 'I…I don't know what to do,' he thought. 'Neil Patrick Harris was my best card, and now…' Yugi stared at his cards, trying to figure out a strategy.
'Yugi,' came a voice in his head. 'Yugi, are you okay? Do you want me to take over?'
'I'm okay Pharoah,' said Yugi. 'At least, I think I am. I need to hurt him back…' That's when an idea hit Yugi. 'Wait a minute…' Yugi checked the cards on his field, and smiled when he found it. 'Ah ha, got it.'
"What are you planning, Yugi?" demanded Kaiba.
"Hey Kaiba," said Yugi. "Would you agree my Neil Patrick Harris card was…powerful?"
"Huh?" asked Kaiba, a little stunned. "I…would say so, yes. What are you getting at?"
"I'm getting at…this trap card," said Yugi, flipping over a black and white card combination he'd put down earlier. "Behind every powerful man is…Snoop Dogg." Behind where Neil Patrick Harris had been standing, a hologram of Snoop Dogg appeared.
"Hmm, big deal," said Kaiba. "So you've got another monster on the field. So what?"
"Except…" said Yugi.
"Oh, God damn it," said Kaiba.
"Snoop Dogg has got plenty of experience smoking that herb," explained Yugi. "Which means he'll have no problems when I unleash this trap too…" Yugi flipped over one of his face down white cards and read it out. "Carbon monoxide poisoning."
"NO! You wouldn't…" said Kaiba, staring at Yugi in shock.
"You took out Neil Patrick Harris, I'm taking out Jennifer Lawrence," said Yugi, as a cloud of gas swept across the battlefield. The cloud reached Jennifer Lawrence, engulfing her for a moment before clearing, showing her dead on the battlefield before she disappeared.
"Damn you Yugi," said Kaiba, as his life points dropped to 5000. "I'll get you yet. First things first though, you lose another 100 life points because of your card in Hell."
"I know," said Yugi, his life points down to 6200. "But now I have a good lead in this game, so a few life points won't make much difference."
"You'd think that, wouldn't you?" asked Kaiba, smirking as he thought about his next play.
Author's note: Life points check
Yugi: 6200
Kaiba: 5000