Sunshine: Nod. You have been acknowledged. Now deflate your head.

I'm sorry Hayley. Haha, being at home sick all day made me feel like farting out a thirty two page chapter. This hasn't been edited, except by the spelling-Nazi that is Sunshine. Thanks to her, Aina, and Nicole for reading as I wrote to them. And sorry to the, um, JFC and PFC. Little boy-bashing in this chappie.

Cough

Love Lolly.

(And Hayley, when she reads this and finds out I UPDATED WITHOUT HER KNOWING I EVEN WROTE ANYTHING.) Squeak . . . Sorry, Hayles . . .

- 8 -

I sped after Paul, in a state of vicious shock.

'Paul, WAIT,' I said, panicking. I mean . . . murder.

That was something way more diabolic than suicide. It was killing someone ELSE. Not yourself. 'Paul - '

He wasn't listening to me. He just kept walking. God, he was mad.

Um. Mad is a gross understatement.

There was a cold, silent, furious rage in his eyes, and his fists were balled.

'Where are you going?' I asked, trying to stand in front of him, but he moved around me. 'Paul, PLEASE, just STOP for a second - '

'They KILLED her,' he snapped, walking on. 'And then they MADE it look like she did that to HERSELF!'

I seized his arm, and yanked him back. Then I shoved him against the wall, breathing hard. 'Keep your voice down, one,' I hissed. 'And two . . . what are you going to do about it? Kill THEM? They're already dead - '

Paul pushed me away. 'Don't try and stop me,' he warned me.

'Are you talking about exorcism?' I snapped. 'Wasn't it just the other day you were telling me how stupid I was to attempt one?'

'There are worse things than exorcism,' he replied coldly.

And continued walking.

I followed again. He'd reached the stairs. 'Paul, they'll kill you - '

He obviously didn't care. I could FEEL the anger that he was radiating. It was painful. I couldn't relate to it on a level that he was obviously experiencing, (I hadn't exactly been sharing a bed with Danielle Moore - our relationship was slightly less affectionate,) but I knew why he was that angry.

Murder.

He was climbing the stairs now. 'Paul,' I persisted, 'Would you SNAP OUT OF IT? They're - '

'Snap out of it?' he echoed in mad incredulity, whirling around to face me. 'Are you BLIND? Did you not SEE what they are capable of? You want me to SNAP OUT OF IT?'

I swallowed. He was so . . . so furious. Taking advantage of my stunned silence, he continued to climb the stairs, reaching the second floor by then.

Okay, I'm sorry, but I was suddenly terrified. He turned back around, and said, 'Don't you come. Don't you dare - '

'Don't you GO then!' I shouted at him.

What's WORSE than exorcism for a ghost?

Oh God, I shudder to think.

My hands were shaking. I didn't know why, but I felt like something bad was going to happen.

And seeing as I'd been pretty accurate that morning, what with Dani's body being found in the shower and me having the same feeling as I had then, well . . . yeah.

Woman's intuition, you might say.

Or a shifter's prophetic ability, whichever is less corny for you.

By the time he was on fourth floor, I was freaking out, major. 'Where are you GOING?' I demanded hotly.

'Attic,' he replied. Even I could hear the cold, deadly quiet undertones in his voice, that only meant one thing.

That it was payback time.

'Suze,' he turned around, 'I'm warning you . . . go.'

I looked a little past him at the dusty, dark, cold corridor.

The attic door was there. It was closed firmly.

Okay, okay, okay, SCARED NOW.

I mean, I did NOT want what happened to Dani to happen to Paul, okay? My reasons for this may have been a little selfish - you know, I'd just spent a night with this guy and I didn't exactly want him to DIE just yet - but whatever. That's completely beside the point.

So yeah, I ran ahead of him and stood stubbornly in front of the attic door, where we both knew the Misforts were haunting. 'Please,' I appealed one last time, my voice no longer TELLING him not to go in, but pleading with him. 'Come on, I know how you're feeling, but you can't - please, don't - '

He stood in front of me, his face deadpan, and white with rage still. 'Suze, move.'

'No,' I shook my head.

'I can make you move,' he said. 'Do you want that?'

I didn't reply. I just stared up at him.

He raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. 'Fine,' he said.

Very easily, he shoved me aside -

I fell painlessly to the dusty floorboards, and retaliated by glaring at him, FORCING him about ten feet away from the door, and slamming him against the wall.

I stood up again, clenching my hands together to stop them shaking so badly.

Paul shook off the excess of my power that was keeping him in position. He grinned, his eyes still alight with a cold, lethal fire. 'Impressive,' he said.

I moved in front of the attic door again. 'I don't care how long I have to keep doing that for,' I replied, 'I swear I'll - '

He came to stand over me again.

'Why don't you want me to go in?' he asked.

I closed my eyes in pained frustration. 'They'll kill you, I said that already - '

'You don't hate me anymore?' he cocked his head.

'That's changed now,' I said quietly. 'You know it has.'

'Ha,' he said, his voice laced with something else now. Disgust. 'So I stick you for one night and suddenly you love me?'

I looked up at him in complete horror. 'W-what?'

His eyes were indifferent. Nothing changed from when he first heard from Bart himself about the fate that Dani had truly suffered. 'Do you love me or something now, Suze?'

My breath caught in my throat. He made it sound so revolting, the way he said it. Like it was something that was really gross to him. Hell, I didn't even KNOW if I - I mean, you know, I - why did he say that?

I didn't know what to say. I mean, I didn't know in myself, what the answer truly was. But even if I DID say yes, right then - would that have made him look even MORE disgusted? More so than he already did?

I flattened myself against the attic door, appalled at what he'd just said. 'Uh - '

He laughed. 'Yeah, thought so. Now get out of here, I don't want you to see this.'

He crossed his arms, waiting for me to move.

But I knew that my eyes were getting very wet, all of a sudden. Everything was going so wrong . . . suddenly, I realized how little last night had meant to him. I realized that everything he'd said this morning had been a complete, utter, obscene lie.

I-WISH-I-COULD-HATE-YOU-SUZE-BUT-I-NEVER-COULD-HATE-YOU my freaking ass.

Although, before anything else could happen - before he could say anything else that would degrade me, or make me realize what a stupid, STUPID mistake I'd made with him, the door behind me opened, and hands enclosed around my shoulders tightly, yanking me back forcefully, and then slamming the door shut again right in front of my eyes. I screamed, and Paul yelled out something too.

And suddenly, I was in real big trouble.

Offending hands, of course, belonged to none other than Charlie and Nathan. As soon as they'd dragged me up the stairs, they threw me on the charred floor. It was even worse, now that they'd caused the OTHER fire the other day. First thing I did was inhale a whole wad of ash, which sent me coughing like mad.

Then, they started laughing.

I lifted my head, still coughing violently into my hand.

The three of them stood there, smirking widely. They looked alive with something . . . like, the adrenaline rush from their murder.

It was terrifying.

'SUZE,' Paul was yelling, trying to open the door, but Robin promptly sent like, almost every moveable item flying down the passageway of the stairs that lead to the door, and completely blocked it up. Paul's voice was muffled horribly.

The moment I went to stand up, I felt myself zooming through air, and landing hard against the wall behind me. I whimpered something pathetic.

Robin's dark eyes were burnt like lasers in my memory. I could feel the power that they knew they had. They'd never killed, before.

Now they had. And they'd got off on it.

. . . Oh, God . . .

'How considerate of you, Susie,' Robin drawled. 'You came right to us. Spared us the hunt.'

I looked at him fiercely. 'Don't you touch me - '

They found that funny. Well, I guess it was to them, seeing as they'd done a LOT of touching of Dani, last night.

'Touching is the least of your worries,' he assured me. I sat back against the wall. They weren't making any movements towards me. Yet.

Just . . . uhhh . . . keep talking to them, Suze.

Paul was still shouting through the mass of obstacles now blocking his way. Well, he could go to hell, now . . . I couldn't believe he'd . . .

You're a damned idiot, Suze. You gave yourself to HIM.

My self misery, however, needed to be postponed.

'Wh - what did you DO to her?' I asked. I knew what they'd done, from the very brief explanation that Bart had provided. But they didn't know that he'd told us.

Obviously, they were trying to cover it up when they drugged her. But I guess that by now, they were too proud to deny what they'd achieved.

'Exactly what we're going to do to you now,' Charlie assured me.

A lurch so violent made me want to throw up anything and everything that was in my stomach.

KEEP TALKING.

'So - ' I blathered on, 'What? Why'd you do it? Why - '

Nathan laughed loudly, and looked at Robin, and then at me. 'We did it because YOU did it.'

My eyes were glued to him. 'What are you talking ab - '

'Don't you get it?' Robin smirked, stepping closer to me. I made a feeble effort to stand, but something intangible, invisible, and supernatural held me perfectly in place, 'We know what you did last night, Susie. You and the lawyer.'

'So what - ?'

'Well, obviously,' Charles shrugged, 'We were obliged to tell his girlfriend what he was up to. She was very hurt, wasn't she?'

Robin and Nathan nodded in an innocent way, as if they were guilty of NOTHING here.

'And well,' Robin picked up, 'She decided that if HE was getting some elsewhere, why couldn't she?'

'Wise decision,' Nathan said.

'Not really,' Charles sniggered. 'When you think about how she ended up - '

'She went to you for - THAT?' I exploded in horror. 'Oh my God - '

The three of them, I swear to GOD, they looked so - so ARROGANT about it. Like they were so PLEASED with their conquest over the life of a very sick woman.

'Well,' Nathan tossed his head. 'It was all going very well,' he paused to laugh to himself, ' . . . VERY well - '

' - When she decided she'd changed her mind,' Charles snapped bitterly. That was the first note of anger I'd heard from the three of them.

The first, destined to be followed by an inevitable sequence of anger.

'So we changed OUR minds about HER,' Robin said. For a moment, I saw just a flash of hesitance. Just a flash. Then, I realized, anything still good and human about him had disappeared.

These three boys were monsters, now. Demons. Their souls had nothing left that was kind.

The astral block was one that was so powerful, it was affecting my ability to THINK even. They had confidence that they didn't before. They knew that they were indeed, capable of killing the living. They'd done it. They weren't afraid of doing it again, now.

After all, what did they have to lose?

Or gain?

Nothing, anymore.

'You killed her,' I breathed. 'How?'

Nathan laughed smugly. 'You already know.'

I did.

'WHY though?' I demanded. 'She's not the one who wants . . . wanted you out of here. She didn't care about you. Why did you kill her?'

Then, I saw a split second of hesitation . . . regret, I could definitely categorize it as . . . in Nathan's eyes. As if he, too, were asking himself that question.

But he decided not to answer me, deeming it a waste of breath that he, as a ghost, didn't technically have to worry about anymore.

Breath, I mean.

Paul was no longer calling. Or if he wasn't, I couldn't hear him. Maybe he'd gone to get help.

Ha. Who the HELL could help me?

No one.

Especially not me. I couldn't help myself here. No way. I couldn't break through the block. It was too strong, now. It was like a physical oppression, or like . . .oxygen was running out, or something.

Basically, I was in a death chamber.

Death had occurred forty years ago.

Death had occurred last night.

And death would occur right now.

'So,' Robin blinked lazily, his arms still crossed with his shameful arrogance. 'You know everything now.'

'No - ' I struggled to find something - ANYTHING to still talk about. Anything that would prolong what was going to happen, what was making me shake like I was. 'I still want to know - uhhhh - '

'I want to ask YOU something,' Robin walked towards me lazily, and sank to his knees in front of me, so we were eye-level. 'Why is it, Susie Simon, that we can never manage to kill you?'

What are you supposed to say to THAT?

'Yeah,' agreed Nathan. 'We've tried . . . drowning you, burning you, choking you . . . '

'And yet, you're still here,' Charlie said in a flat tone. 'With Danielle, it only took thirty four tiny little tablets.'

I breathed in sharply.

'Maybe,' I said, 'In the grand scheme of things, I'm just not meant to die, haha - '

'Tripe,' Nathan said. 'We're going to correct this little issue now, aren't we, Robbie?'

'Yes, we are,' Robin replied with a coldness that tied cords around my heartstrings.

With that, Robin got to his feet again, and the other two came to stand beside him. Promptly, a strange, cold sensation washed over me, and I felt a horrible pressure in my head.

'What - ' I began, but with a sudden rush, I felt myself being lifted well off the ground.

And then being slammed back down against it.

Hard.

Yes, I screamed, okay? It freaking HURT. My back felt like it had broken.

They did it again. And I didn't know what to do. I couldn't use any power against them - their's was FAR too potent. Overwhelmingly so. When I hit the ground the third time, I was not propelled in the air again. They left me there for a moment, and just laughed.

The second I tried moving, Charlie sank his knee into my back, and twisted my arm behind me. I cried out.

'Was that fun?' he hissed. 'Did the rush get to you? Want another go?'

'You are SO going to hell,' I spat, the side of my face against the burnt floorboards. I coughed again as I breathed the ash in. It infected my lungs. My back hurt so badly.

WHERE WAS PAUL? God, LEAVE me why don't you!

Charlie spun me around so I was face-up, and smirked. Robin knelt on the other side of me.

And Nathan threw a pillow at me.

Wow. I got told. Whoa, I'm so back in my box now. Ex-CUSE ME.

Let's all THROW PILLOWS.

Why don't we just take pillows to WAR? That'll teach the opponents a THING OR TWO.

After the whole slamming-me-against-the-floor-repeatedly thing, the pillow was kinda lame.

However, that thought was changed when Robin smiled darkly, seized the pillow with both hands, and shoved it firmly against my face.

. . . Efficiently blocking off all of my air supply.

Everything went grey. I started blinking fast, and thrashing about FURIOUSLY, trying to get the pillow away from my face. I couldn't - I couldn't . . . breathe -

The harder I struggled, the more they forced me down, laughing, laughing, laughing all the way.

OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE IN A ONE-HORSE OPEN-SLEIGH.

I tried turning my head, but Robin had wrapped the pillow around my face entirely, causing this action to be utterly useless.

The ache started to leave me, and I stopped blinking and squirming so much . . .

But just to, you know, be traditional, who should come to the rescue but SOMEONE THAT WAS NOT ME?

Why was I SO incapable of freaking SAVING MYSELF?

Am I THAT much of a loser? My GOD.

All hands left me, and I went completely still in dizzy anticipation. Then, the pillow was yanked off of my face, and Jesse de Silva was sliding his arms behind my back, and my knees, and was lifting me up.

And I was coughing, coughing, coughing all the way.

Hey.

With an explosion of noise, the passageway suddenly became free, and I heard frantic footsteps come up the stairs, and then Paul was yelling stuff. I didn't really hear what. Sounded pretty panicky though.

Ha. Bet HE was feeling kinda sucky. Imagine, last thing he said to me? "Do you love me or something, Suze?" in that TOTALLY grossed out voice.

Hmph.

'Suze,' he smoothed his hands over my face.

'Slater, stay away from her,' Jesse said coldly, and Paul's hands weren't touching me.

'What the hell?' he demanded.

'You let this happen,' Jesse said in a tamed fury.

'Oh, FUCK off,' Paul yelled. I winced. God. Did he have to be so loud? It was like he was screeching right in my ear, or something.

I started getting feeling coming back into my body. Jesse held me closer, and began moving. 'Suze, what happened?' Paul asked hurriedly.

I didn't answer. Why the hell did he care? I was just a one night stand, after all. It didn't MEAN anything to him.

I sniffed loudly.

'Slater,' Jesse said threateningly, 'Leave - '

'NO,' Paul spat, 'You don't freaking OWN her - '

Well, neither do you.

'Would you both shut up?' I whined. I wanted to stand, and walk away from the PAIR of them, being all dramatic and sophisticated and sexy and everything, but you know . . . "stand" is such a strooooooong word . . .

'Susannah?' Jesse asked, 'Are you all right?'

'What does it LOOK like?' Paul snarled at him. 'Of COURSE she isn't - '

'Courtesy of you,' Jesse retorted snidely.

'Can you please just shut up?' I asked again. 'God, you're so loud . . . '

They both fell silent.

I wasn't coughing anymore - therefore, we were out of the attic.

Jesse's arms were holding me possessively. 'What did they do, Susannah?'

'They - they killed Dani,' I said, because he obviously didn't know.

Jesse sighed. 'Dios . . . Now she's hurt her head. I hope you're proud of yourself, Slater - '

'No,' Paul said angrily, 'They did. And they made it look like she did it herself.'

That shut Jesse up.

I took that opportunity to move my legs, and get out of his hold. Ugh. Cowboys. I held onto his shoulder as I stood up, waiting for the much needed oxygen to get to the rest of my body successfully. My back was hurting. And my head.

And, um . . . well, we won't go to the other region. But that wasn't the Misforts' fault, so much as Paul's.

Cough.

'See?' I said pointedly to Paul, 'I told you not to go - '

'I told you not to come!' he snapped back at me.

'You're as much of an idiot as I was the other day,' I scowled.

'They - they killed Danielle?' Jesse said in shock.

'Wow, Rico's slow on the uptake,' Paul said rudely.

GOD, I WAS GOING TO KICK BOTH OF THEIR ASSES IN A SECOND. When, you know, I regained proper function of my foot.

'Paul,' I said in frustration, holding my head, 'Get Adam to take Jack out of here. Get CeeCee to call Mr Head, to tell him what happened. Jesse, stay with everyone who still has a heartbeat - ' not referring to Danielle Moore, any longer, who recently lost that status.

'What about you?' Jesse asked.

'I'll take care of her,' Paul said quickly.

'No,' I said. 'I'm going to see Father Dom.'

I took a shaky step, and slipped. Four hands came around my waist immediately. God, I'm popular when I'm nearly-dead.

'Why?' Jesse asked.

I closed my eyes again, against my thumping headache. 'He'll know what to do . . . he always does . . .'

8 -

Well, even the best made plans don't go smoothly.

Not that mine was one of the best made plans, or anything. But yeah, Adam didn't want to leave CeeCee here on her own, despite Paul's request for him to take Jack back to Carmel, with Dr. Slaski. So I had to go to CeeCee, tell her to convince Adam that she'd be okay. I decided it would be best not to mention that the Misforts – well, three quarters of them – had just made another attempt on my life.

Minor detail.

She said she'd take Jack back herself, but I told her not to, because we needed her here for research. She was the only one who could really get hard information, and she knew it.

In the end, I ended up recruiting her to call Mr Head. We were in the library then, and she began talking softly into her phone. I went wandering the library, unnerved by the silence. It was like a plague. It felt like one . . .

After about three minutes, however, I heard sounds of outright indignation. I quickly ran back to CeeCee, who had her cell against her ear, her mouth open in furious astonishment. She stared at the phone in horror as she hung up, and looked at me.

'What?' I said quickly, sitting next to her.

'That – that – ' she shook her head, aghast. 'That son of a bitch . . . '

'What?' I said again, more urgently.

She kept shaking her head. Then, she looked at me with incensed eyes. 'He – I told him about Dani. I also told him about the other events that have been occurring at this school. You know, where me and Adam almost got – ' she broke off, furious. 'That – that asshole was ANGRY that his damned GRAVEYARD got destroyed. He didn't say a WORD about the fact that Dani k – '

I narrowed my eyes. 'You're joking.'

'No,' she stuffed her phone irately into her pocket, and jammed her fist on the library desk. 'God, I swear, I could – ugh.'

'He'll burn in hell one day,' I agreed.

Like three other people I know of.

I ran my hands through my hair kind of shakily. I mean, I've never been a fan of human kindness. I've met my fair share of devil's advocates. But . . . how can someone be so cold? A woman DIED. And he was worried about his stupid CEMETERY being messed up?

I swear to God . . . ugh.

Why the hell does this fabulous God even create dickheads (pun not intended) like him?

'Suze,' CeeCee said softly. 'I've been meaning to talk to you.'

I looked up into Cee's violet eyes. She blinked gently, her gaze riveted on me.

'What about?' I asked.

Play dumb why don't you, Suze.

'About what Dani – what she said yesterday,' CeeCee said. 'That Cole guy.'

I laughed. 'Oh, him.'

'Was she telling the truth?' she asked, leaning closer to me, her voice dropping to a whisper. 'Is this guy really – '

'I don't want to talk about this,' I said tightly.

'But you need to,' CeeCee's eyes went severe. 'Suze, have you been to the police about him?'

I placed my hands in front of my mouth, and shrugged.

'Yes, or no?'

'No,' I muttered. 'Look, it doesn't matter, I think he's like, over me now,' I laughed timidly. 'Haha . . . '

'It's not funny, Suze,' she said.

'Ya think?'

She sighed. 'You're so stubborn, damn it.'

'Thanks.'

'It's not a good thing,' she snapped. 'I'm just trying to help – '

'Of course you are,' I said. 'Paul said he was trying to help, too. Then he went and blabbed to his girlfriend during pillow talk. And now you all know. I didn't WANT you to know, okay? It's my business, and my problem. And Paul thinks he's God's gift to losers, thinking he's some savior or something, helping the helpless, and he's really one of the ones that'll end up going to hell,' I said bitterly.

CeeCee blinked.

'Sorry,' I murmured, going to stand up, but her hand came over mine. 'What happened? I thought you two – '

'Yeah, well,' I sighed, showcasing my feigned indifference, 'It wasn't meant to happen. Obviously.'

She made me sit down again. 'Why, Suze?'

I sank back into the seat, and stared at my hands, feeling like nothing. I mean . . . here I was, feeling sorry for myself and my recent loss of virginity, when someone just DIED.

I'm just that selfish.

It was WRONG of me to be so self-absorbed and worried about ME when things had to be done about what happened to Dani. I mean, she's a jerk, but she deserves SOME retribution, right?

Even if it's just a little, tiny bit.

I laughed coldly. 'He just . . . said some things that hurt,' I said.

CeeCee still had her hand in mine, and was now running her thumb over the back of my hand sympathetically. 'Aww, Suze.'

I laughed again. I have no idea why . . . nothing was funny . . .

'Well, it's my own fault,' I said with self-disgust. 'I got caught up in a moment with him last night. It just happened. And I didn't even know what I was doing, I mean, I hadn't done it before – '

'But yesterday, you were telling me about all those guys you'd – ' CeeCee interrupted, but silenced herself when I gave her a deeply sorrowful look.

'I lied,' I said. 'I didn't . . . I mean, it's pretty pathetic, that, you know – I hadn't ever – I mean – '

'Of course it's not,' CeeCee shook her head. 'Suze, it's – it's admirable. You should have just told me. I wouldn't have held it against you or anything.'

I sniffed.

'God,' I said, biting my fingers. 'I'm not exactly admirable anymore, am I? I'm . . . I'm such an idiot – '

And I started crying.

Hard.

Oh, spare me.

CeeCee instantly went into turbo-mother-hen mode, and was all with the 'No you're not' and 'It's okay' crap. When it really wasn't. I felt . . . disgusting.

And disgusted.

'And – and – ' I blubbered on, 'I mean, I didn't think about it at the time b-but he said he'd just broken up with D-Dani and what if I was j-just – rebound or something?'

She totally wrapped her arms around me and patted on my back with her hand, jerking each and every one of my sobs. 'Aww, honey . . .'

I felt humiliated, and mortified, and ashamed, and really grossed out. I mean, God, what if it was because I . . . you know, wasn't good at it or something? Or maybe because I made such a fuss when . . . you know.

IT.

We were always having competitions. To see who was better than the other.

I'd well and truly lost. I'd been played, pretty much. And I think that that's the ultimate victory he could have EVER had over me.

You know, getting me in bed and making me think that he meant it.

I mean . . . I thought he DID. He'd been so sincere this morning. Before we found her – I mean, the body. I thought he'd meant everything he'd said to me, about being sorry, and about never hating me, and all that stuff about wanting me and stuff. I thought he meant it. He sounded like he did. And I was allowing myself to feel feelings that I usually NEVER allowed myself to feel.

And it was all for nothing.

And then we found Dani's corpse.

. . . And THEN, to chuck a cheery on the top of the sundae, I almost got killed by DANI'S killers.

'Suze,' CeeCee went suddenly, sounding like she was hesitant to even ask, 'Did you both . . . erm . . . use – you know?'

I nodded quickly. 'Of course,' I said, wiping my nose on the back of my hand – eww . . . 'I mean, I'm not that stupid.'

Strangely enough.

Kinda weird, though, how Paul randomly had one on him.

Erm, a contraceptive, I mean. Probably in preparation for the ever-horny Dani.

Heh. Protection before erection, after all, always the way to go. For about ten seconds, I was fine. Then I began sobbing uncontrollably again. I guess I was still in shock from Robin, Nathan and Charles, and you know . . . Dani's death.

'God, what did he SAY to you?' CeeCee demanded to know. Careful not to tell her the circumstance, I repeated his words. Needless to say, she got really, REALLY pissed off.

'I'm going to kill him,' she promised. 'I'm going to kill him for you, okay, Simon? We're going to amputate his penis, okay?'

Sobbing, I choked on a laugh. Then I started crying again. And revenge of the Turbo Mother Hen that was CeeCee Webb.

Golly . . . me, Paul and Jesse were the only ones that knew Dani's death wasn't suicide. I guess I had to tell her. Cee, I mean. There was no point her NOT knowing. Besides her maybe wanting to hightail it. If so, I didn't blame her in the least, anymore. I could still see the shock in her eyes that hadn't left since this morning, the moment she'd seen what was waiting, stone cold, in the shower.

I knew that that shock in her eyes was now going to get worse . . .

'CeeCee, you should know something . . . don't tell Jack . . .'

8 -

After I shattered CeeCee's world all over again, her, myself, Adam and Jack left for the hospital. We wanted to see how Father Dom was going, and tell him the bad news. Well, we didn't WANT to tell him the bad news, but . . . yeah.

When we turned up in his hospital room, he was fast asleep. Before I said that we'd come back later, Jack ran up to him and started waking him up.

Ugh. Kids.

Well, Father Dom was all smiles when he saw us. But he wasn't dumb.

'Susannah . . . what is the matter?'

So Adam went with Jack to go grab a coke from the vending machines, and me and CeeCee filled him in on what the Misforts – you know, the mean ones – did to Dani.

He wasn't all smiles after that.

In fact, he was pretty darn silent.

For a second or something, I thought he was going to have a freaking HEART ATTACK or something, with the look on his face.

'Oh, my,' he said after forever. 'Oh, goodness . . . why, Susannah? Why did she approach them for . . . those reasons? Were Paul and Danielle fighting at all, that you know of?'

CeeCee looked at me sharply, then she was all, 'You know what? Adam isn't good with vending machines, I'm gonna go offer my expertise.'

AND SHE LEFT ME AT THE MERCY OF THE HOLY MAN.

'Susannah?' Father Dom said quietly. 'Susannah, what is wrong? There's more that you wish to tell me. I can see it in your eyes.'

I winced. 'Uhhh . . . well, it's kinda . . . last night, I . . . the thing is – '

'You and Paul?' Father Dom said tonelessly.

I looked at him quickly. 'How – how did you - ?'

'Susannah,' he sighed, 'I have been hearing confession for over thirty years. I think that I'm rather an expert when it comes to what people view as their sins. In addition, I rather expected that this would happen. It was obvious to me that the pair of you acted a certain way around each other.'

I stared at the old, bald guy in abject horror.

HOW DO SIXTY-SOMETHING-YEAR-OLDS PICK THIS UP WHEN I DON'T?

'Um,' I said. 'Er, I didn't know that.'

'Obviously not,' he said. 'And undoubtedly, you believe you caused Danielle's death?' His eyes were momentarily weighed down with grief.

'Uh – '

'Do not think that. Danielle's actions were her own, when she decided to have . . . relations with the Misfortunates. She did not deserve what happened to her in the least. You shall never hear me say that. But Susannah, it is not your fault. She was murdered out of cold blood. Not by you.'

I groaned. 'But it wouldn't have happened if Paul and I hadn't have – '

'That is not the issue,' Father Dom said in a louder voice than my own. 'Susannah, don't blame yourself.'

I was still majorly grossed out that a priest could have foreseen the dramatic jumpstart to my sex life.

But that's just me, ya know.

'That said,' Father D murmured, 'You have not had a phone call from Sister Ernestine, have you?'

'Uhm,' I was surprised, 'No.'

He sighed. 'She told my doctor that she was gathering the required amount that would cover the costs of my radiotherapy, but obviously, she has not reached that amount yet.' He sighed again. 'Oh well . . . God works in mysterious ways, Susannah.'

'You're telling me,' I muttered.

He laughed gently, and then AGAIN, sighed. 'Do the police know Dani's cause of death yet?'

'They said they'd get back autopsy stuff tomorrow,' I said. 'And THEN they'd start questioning us, if necessary. They're pretty sure that she OD'ed, though. That's what it looks like, after all.'

Father Dominic closed his eyes temporarily. 'Susannah, get my rosary beads out for me, would you? Second drawer . . . that one, yes . . .'

I passed them to him.

He held them for a moment, and then opened his eyes again. 'What do you plan to do now? I believe that I'm rather bed bound, and therefore cannot bless the school in any way.'

'That's why I came,' I said. 'What do YOU think we should do? You're the one who always knows everything.'

He muttered something under his breath.

'What?' I asked.

'I'm . . . I'm just tired, Susannah,' he said gently.

'Oh,' I said. 'Uh, I'll go - ?'

Okay, when I say that, I usually expect the NO NO NO! STAY! thing, but if I did then, I was sadly disappointed.

'Yes,' he said. 'That might be . . . best . . . ' His forehead wrinkled in pain.

I swear, this was just not happening . . . why was everything going so wrong? God, it was like a hellish alternate dimension, where things weren't ALLOWED to go right.

Okay, uh, that really wasn't a helpful visit. I mean, no doubt I'd put a load on HIS mind. And now I had to seriously think about what I was going to do with this whole money issue. I mean, he needed it quickly. Maybe . . . maybe we could get Mr Head to pay for Dani's money as compensation for what happened to her, and we could use that to pay for Father Dom's therapy -

No way, Suze. That's COLD

Maybe I could just get mine in advance, and pay for him? God . . . I didn't know what to do. He looked so tired. And sad. Like he was getting slowly sicker, and he would continue to deteriorate if I didn't do something.

This isn't how life is supposed to go.

You know, continuous bad events.

Like that freakin' Lemony Snicket book series. With Jim Carrey in the movie they made of it.

A Series of Unfortunate Events.

Ha. These weren't unfortunate.

(More like Misfortunate.)

They were nightmares.

When I got up off the guest chair and went to exit the room, Father Dom was pretty much asleep again, holding his rosary beads firmly in his hand. His lips were moving. Like he was praying or something.

. . . God doesn't listen to the SIA anymore . . .

Did he EVER?

No.

He didn't.

God's whole Christianity thing is CRAP. I mean, not even his buddies (the ones who actually BELIEVED in him) got it easy. NO. They got TUMORS and LOVES with DEAD PEOPLE that NEVER WORKED OUT.

In the white, cold hallways of the hospital, I saw CeeCee, Adam and Jack waiting for me to come out. As soon as they saw me, they pretended to look busy to make it seem like they WEREN'T giving me time to talk to Father Dom about people I'd screwed the night before, as opposed to just HAPPENING to come back from the vending machine at that PRECISE POINT IN TIME.

'Come on,' I said. 'Let's go.'

Back to where this hell began.

8 -

When we got back from the hospital, I decided that we had to have a meeting of some kind. I mean . . . everyone was in shambles. The SIA was a mess. One of our colleagues was in hospital, and one was dead. This wasn't a safe job, anymore. I mean, it never was, but now, the stakes were so high that they were out of sight. I couldn't even see them anymore.

I mean . . . Adam, CeeCee and Jack . . . if ANYTHING happened to them, I'd -

I don't know.

I really don't.

In the library, I sat on the table. CeeCee was next to me, not talking, Adam was staring into space again, a very blank look on his face. He was scared.

I didn't blame him.

And Jack . . . God. He was just painful to look at. He was trying. He really was. To keep it together, I mean. He didn't want to crack.

But I knew that it wasn't long before he did.

Paul and Jesse showed up. Paul sat down, and Jesse stood behind Jack, and put his hand on his shoulder supportively. Paul shot Jesse a dirty look at that action, but said nothing.

I sighed, and made sure that my eyes NEVER came into contact with Paul's. Because if they did, then I knew that I'd be exactly like Jack.

I'd crack, too.

As in, crash and burn.

'Okay,' I said, my voice sounding kind of rusty, 'Uhhh . . . I think we really needed to, you know, get together and just . . . see how everyone's going . . . '

Wow. That sure was inspirational. Bet that was life-changing.

No one spoke for a moment. I felt stupid. Then Jesse said, 'We are . . . as fine as we can be, under the very unfortunate circumstances.'

Again, Paul threw a glare at Jesse.

I nodded. 'Right . . . uh, well, do we know what's happening with Jack?'

Thirteen-year-old in question jerked up. 'Huh? What about me?'

'You're going home,' Paul said. 'I'm taking you tonight back to Pops' - '

'No!' Jack protested. 'I told you, I don't want to go! CeeCee said this morning that there's no danger. Just because of what Dani did to herse - '

'Jack,' I said loudly to cover up what we all knew was both incorrect, tactless and painful, 'You're going, and that's final. So, Paul, you're . . . ' I looked at his neck. Not at him. ' . . . taking him back?'

'Yes,' he said stiffly. 'Tonight.'

'It's too long a drive,' CeeCee said. 'You should wait till tomorrow. Listen - ' she turned to Adam, 'If I go with you, will you take him back?'

Jack looked outraged.

Adam narrowed his eyes curiously. ' . . . Leave the school? Permanently?'

'No,' CeeCee said. 'I'm coming back. You can if you want. You don't have to.'

Adam held her hand. 'I'm not leaving you here on your own.'

I coughed a little. 'Uh, wow. I sure feel like nothing now. Thanks.'

Adam shook his head. 'No, I just meant . . . '

'I know,' I said softly, crossing my legs on the desk.

Paul's arms were folded. 'Fine, you two'll take him back to Carmel.'

Oops. I guess he was looking forward to the trip away from m - uhh, Fortunaschwein.

Jesse said, 'What about tonight?'

'What do you mean?' I asked.

'Huh?' CeeCee went.

'Jesse spoke,' Jack said dully.

'Oh.'

'Tonight,' Jesse explained. 'Is it . . . wise to sleep inside?'

There was a murmur of agreement from Paul, as he eyed me. 'Uh,' I went. 'Where are we supposed to go then?'

'Sleep in cars outside,' Paul suggested. 'Just for the nights. They know not to go out of school grounds.'

'But they can - ' I protested, but I looked at Paul's eyes, and saw that he knew very WELL they could, but was saying this as if they were eavesdropping.

'I mean, of course they can't,' I said quickly. Paul's lips went crooked in a wry smirk as if to say, Oh-well-done-Suze.

'Right,' I nodded curtly. 'What else?'

'Dinner,' CeeCee said. 'Uhm, I think we should just order in. Adam and I don't really feel in the mood for cooking.'

'Fair enough,' I said. 'Chinese, everybody?' There was a place in Gilroy, I remember it. It was on the back of one of the Pete's Pizza brochures that I had from that day out with the Slater brothers. I could scab the number from there, and blackmail the restaurant people to deliver, or else I'd smite their firstborn children.

Everyone agreed.

Not that I was really going to eat much . . . I don't think anyone really was. But it was comfortable having foor, I guess.

'Anything else we need to talk about?'

'Tomorrow, I have to go to the police station,' Paul said. 'Autopsy on Dani'll be done, and we need to see what . . . they concluded.'

A grim, dark silence fell down on us.

I coughed. 'Sure,' I nodded. 'You can do that when CeeCee and Adam take Jack back.'

'I don't WANT to - '

'You're coming with me,' Paul said. He was demanding my eye contact again, but I refused to look at him. Not when I felt as low as I did.

'No I'm not,' I said. 'I can stay with Jesse.'

Paul let out a scornful noise, and looked away angrily. 'Riiiiiight.'

'I can protect her better than YOU obviously can, Slater,' Jesse snapped. 'As you proved this morning - '

I cleared my throat, and motioned to Jack, who was looking confused. 'Huh?'

'Yeah, huh?' Adam went. 'Can someone like . . . repeat stuff that Jesse-boy says? It's kinda hard to get into a conversation flow - '

CeeCee elbowed him.

'So,' I said loudly. 'That sounds like it's pretty much it . . . anything else?'

'Do I have to go?' Jack whimpered. 'I don't want to go. I want to stay with y - . . . stay here.'

'You're going tomorrow, Jack,' Paul said firmly. 'Pack tonight.'

Jack glared. 'This sucks.'

'Yeah, it also sucks that Dani's dead,' I snapped at him. 'But we have to live with that, too.' I ran my hands down my face.

'Okay,' I dismissed, 'That's pretty much it. Cee, I'll give you the Chinese Take-Out number, and uhhh . . . Paul, I need to talk to you.'

I chanced a look up at him, and saw that his eyes were narrowed curiously at me.

Oh, joy.

I told CeeCee briefly where to find the brochure in my room, and Adam went with her to get it. Jesse lead Jack away to pack his stuff.

'Listen,' I said, 'I want to say this quickly – '

'Suze,' Paul said.

'I know it's not really my place to ask for this, but I really need this at the moment - '

'Suze,' he said again. I ignored him.

'Father Dominic needs money for his radiotherapy, and he can't start it until he has it,' I said tonelessly. 'You don't have to if you don't want to, but if you could just lend it, and . . . I'll pay you back as soon as we get paid for this job. Interest, if you want, I don't care. But he needs it real bad, and I don't know what else to do - '

'Suze,' Paul said louder.

'So?' I crossed my arms.

He blinked, looking kind of frustrated. 'We need to talk.'

'We ARE talking,' I pointed out. 'Now seriously, just tell me yes or no, so I can see if I can get the money somewhere else - '

Just as long as I don't resort to prostitution. Eww.

'Look, yes,' he said. 'I mean - of course I wouldn't say no, and - you don't have to pay it back - '

'Yes I do,' I said stiffly. 'Okay. Thank you. Really.'

I turned to go, but his hand came to my elbow. 'Wait - '

I brushed it off.

I guess he didn't appreciate how badly he'd hurt me earlier. 'No can do, sorry. I'll, uh, see you later.'

I walked out of the library as quickly as I could, and as soon as I was outside, I stopped, took the BIGGEST breath, tried not to break, composed myself, and continued on.

8 -

Chinese wasn't exactly a grand affair. The restaurant refused to deliver, more so when they heard where we were temporarily residing. CeeCee and Adam ended up having to go up to get it from Gilroy. They both came back, shaken up majorly. Apparently, on a TV at the restaurant, there'd been a huge thing about Danielle Moore's shock-death.

Well, that's great. Now the whole world's going to know about it. Apparently they said that didn't know cause of death yet, but police were leaning towards suicide, and autopsy reports would prove this theory.

God. She was still in the news, even as a corpse.

After I'd taken a couple of mouthfuls, I felt pretty sick, and ate no more. I think that the atmosphere was getting thicker, heavier, and even more asphyxiating. We were all pretty much ready to go outside for the night. Jack was pretty out of it. He was so tired, but was trying to stay awake. Poor guy . . .

I was tired myself. Drained, you know?

I mean . . . pretty much 18 hours ago, I hadn't been sleeping by myself. And now, I would be. It was just hard. I mean . . . the prospect of never trusting anyone enough to not sleep by myself again . . . it was scary. After how Paul was treating me, I didn't really WANT to think about it. I felt like shit. To him, I probably was.

. . . Can't change that, I guess.

I had a rug with me in Father Dom's car. Paul was in his own with Jack, and CeeCee Adam were in . . . CeeCee and Adam's car.

Figures.

I'd taken a drowsy pill to help me sleep. God knew I wouldn't otherwise. So many things were going on in my head. Oh well. At least I had one assurance: that Father Dom's radiotherapy was going to go okay, providing that Paul kept his word on the money thing.

And of COURSE I'd pay him back. Every cent. Who did he think I was? Some bitch who mooched off of his money, like his previous girlfriend?

Who was unavoidably dead . . .

You would not ever hear me say, as the pills were taking affect, and I was sinking into a dreamless sleep, that I did not feel lonely.

I did.

There were no arms holding me. My breathing wasn't fast and uneven anymore. My heart wasn't soring, and I was feeling anything BUT pleasure and pain.

Well, maybe a little pain.

But not physical, anymore.

Save, you know, my back, after what the Misforts did to me today.

So yeah. I felt cold, and numb, and hated, and so, SO alone . . .

It was like, ten or something when my eyes drifted closed. And when I was being awoken at four in the morning, it felt like I'd only slept for ten minutes.

'Suze . . . ? Suze, please wake up. Please . . . pleeeeeeease - '

Okay. I may be a bitch sometimes, but there's no way that I can ignore it when a teenage boy is crying and begging for me not to be asleep.

Instantly, (okay, maybe not so instantly, shut up, I drugged myself up, okay?) I groaned, and looked around in confusion. 'Huh . . . Jack? Is that - '

He was silhouetted against the moonlight, and was patting my arm. 'Suze - '

I sat up. 'Jack, what's - '

He moved quickly into my arms, hugging me tightly, crying.

'Jack?' I said, panicking. It was really cold in the car. I hadn't noticed while I was asleep, but I did now. 'Jack, what's wrong? Jack? Why are you shaking?' I held him close. 'Shhh, calm down, what happened.'

He wouldn't talk. He'd slowed in his crying, but he was still shivering. But I doubted it was because he was cold.

I pulled the covers over him. 'Jack,' I said. I mean . . . I wasn't exactly good with kids. I didn't know what to do? What if he'd wet the bed? What -

Suze, he's thirteen, not five.

And he wasn't sleeping in a bed. He was in Paul's CAR. Which is leather. And would therefore get brutally slain by his brother if he should have so happened to urinate in his Jaguar.

His head was buried against my neck, and I could still feel him trembling. He was like ice, I swear. 'Shhhhh,' I whispered again, rubbing his back a little, feeling like a total pedophile. 'It's, um, okay.'

'I saw - I saw her - ' he stuttered incoherently. 'Walking - white, she . . . and then . . . they were . . . and she was . . . she tried to - and - she - '

'Who?' I asked quickly.

'Dani,' he sniffed, still shaking. 'Her eyes were grey - '

Okay. First indicator - ghosts don't have grey eyes.

'Jack, shhhhhh,' I soothed. 'It's okay, you were dreaming.'

'No I wasn't - she was outside the car and - she was covered in her towel - '

Second indicator. Ghosts come back in their prime of life, not their death clothes.

Not that Dani was wearing much when she was . . . never mind.

'Jack,' I said. 'Look, I promise, you were just dreaming. I promise.'

'She tried to - ' he began again.

God, he was hysterical. And, um, pretty strong. I felt like I was being choked to death, he was hugging me so tightly. 'Jack,' I hissed firmly, 'Look at me.'

He did. His lips were quavering, and his face was stark white.

'What colour are my eyes?' I asked him patiently.

Slowly, he said, ' . . . Green.'

'That's right,' I replied. 'What colour would they be if I was a ghost?' He blinked. He didn't know what I was saying. 'They'd be green,' I explained. 'Jesse's are brown. Dani's were hazel, not grey. You know that. That doesn't change when you die. Am I right?'

He didn't agree straight away. He was staring at my eyes in horror. Aww, man . . . he was freezing. 'Am I right, Jack? Do people's eye colour change when they die?'

'N-no,' he said. 'But - '

'And remember Maria?' I persisted. 'Maria de Silva? The pretty ghost that made you exorcise Jesse?'

Okay, um, Suze? Bad wording. He started crying again.

'No, no - Jack, I mean - I didn't mean it like that - Jack, shhhhhhh - ' I rubbed his back again, and he hugged himself right against me again. Which, you know, is saying something, because the guy is almost as big as me.

Just not quite as old.

Cough.

'Do you remember her?' I went on doggedly.

'Y-yes,' he sobbed.

'She was like, eighty when she died,' I said. 'Did she look eighty to you?'

'No,' he said, moving his head away from my neck again. 'She looked like you when you were - when - when you were sixteen - '

'Exactly,' I said. 'She didn't look like she did when she died. And neither would Dani.'

I didn't like to mention that my Dad's ghost was wearing the same shirt he died in. I mean . . . who needs to know that at a time like this?

'Okay?' I said. 'And furthermore, she would not be all white. Honey, you had a bad dream, and I don't blame you . . . that was rough stuff today.'

'Yesterday,' he said shakily. 'It's . . . it's a new day now.'

I smiled supportively, trying not to think about what exactly would scare this kid so much in a dream that he'd be in this state.

I mean, Dani's pretty scary ALIVE. But as a zombie . . . sheesh.

Braaaaaains . . . BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS . . .

Erm . . . You get the idea.

'That's right,' I said. 'It's a new day, okay?'

Not necessarily a BETTER one, but a new one.

Ha. I didn't know how true that would turn out to be . . .'Okay, Jack? See, this is why Paul wants you to go home. Because you shouldn't have seen her this morning. But you did, and I'm sorry. It's nothing to be scared about, though. She's not coming back, okay? That's the way it is. And even if she did, she'd try to claw MY eyes out, not yours. I'm not exactly on her list of favourite people, am I.'

He laughed very softly. He wasn't shaking so much anymore.

'Can I - ' he paused, and licked his lips. 'Can I stay in here?'

Sure, Suze. You've slept with ONE Slater, why not the other?

'Uh,' I said, 'I don't know - '

'Please?' he asked quickly. 'Please, I mean, I just . . . I don't want - '

'Okay,' I sighed. 'Don't do anything kinky, okay?'

I've had enough crap from your brother.

. . . God, I AM a pedophile. AAAAAAAAAH!

Jack calmed down a little bit more. 'Thank you,' he said in a tiny voice. He got off my lap - UGH, KINKY THOUGHTS, GO AWAY! I AM NOT A CHILD MOLESTOR, I SWEAR! - and sat beside me. I shared my rug with him, and he was asleep within half an hour.

Holding my hand.

Which, you know, is kind of cute.

. . . As long as he doesn't accuse me of being a kiddie-lover, come morning.

I mean, I don't APPROVE of Michael Jackson's extra curricular activities, okay?

Whatever.

As I was trying to get back to sleep, I saw someone wandering around outside.

Okay, I'll admit, I had to control my bladder for 0.0005 seconds. Then I realized that it was just Jesse, and not a zombie Dani, out for brains.

Ha. If she came to me for any, she'd be sadly disappointed.

Jesse saw me awake through the car window. I must admit, now I had evil zombie Dani corpses on the mind, his paleness from the moonlight WAS kind of creepy. 'Susannah?' he mouthed through the window.

I waved a little. I'm sorry, but my heart always twanged a little painfully at every glance I got of Jesse, now.

I mean, it was kinda bad enough that I wasn't in love with him, and that he KNEW I wasn't. But the fact that I'd kind of ended up horizontal with his arch nemesis, well . . . that was something he could never know. I mean, it would kill him if he found out.

Again.

He moved to the driver's seat car door, and moved right through the glass and metal, seating himself in front of me and looking back. He looked so stark in the moonlight. Like a black and white photo. No shades. Just . . . light and shadow. 'Why is Jack not in Slater's car?'

'He had a nightmare,' I said in a soft voice. 'And I guess he didn't think that Paul would be as accommodating, at this hour.'

Jesse smiled slightly, looking at Jack. 'Bad dream?'

'Dani,' I said.

'I see,' he replied. 'Well . . . it's to be expected, querida. He was too young to have - '

'Susannah,' I said.

He stopped. 'Que?'

'Susannah,' I said again. 'Not - I'm not querida anymore, Jesse.'

He went very still. 'Oh,' he breathed, after a moment. His face looked . . . oh, God. WHY did I have to say that?

'I - ' he coughed a little. 'I should go . . . I'm watching over you, after all. wouldn't want anything else to happen . . . '

He looked back at me, and I blinked down. 'Erm . . . good night then.'

Jesse bowed his head. 'Good night. Susannah.'

I bit my lip. He turned to do his whole ghostly-move-through-the-glass thing, but stopped, not looking at me. 'You will always be mi querida, Susannah. Siempre.'

And he left.

. . . Something wet streaked down my face.