Disclaimer: I don't own the Akatsuki, but I rent Sasori for the weekends.  Sorry, but Only Zetsu, Kisame, Itachi, Deidara, and Sasori are going to be in this fic. No Hidan or Kakuzu, since I don't know them that well. ;-;

An Akatsuki Vacation

"Oh my gawd, look, un!" an excited blonde screamed, grinning broadly and drooling over an internet pop-up he had come across while checking his email. "I'VE JUST WON A VACATION TO EUROPE, UN!"

Sasori and Itachi came to investigate, leaving Kisame and Zetsu in the living room, where they were eating their hearts out.

"Erm, Deidara," Sasori said, peering at the screen. "Those pop-ups are never honest, you know."

"What do you know?" Deidara snapped. "All I have to do is enter my credit card number, email address, and phone number, then I have to look at some 'exciting' offers, un…."

"It's a freaking ad!" Itachi scolded. "It's just to snag your attention, and…"

"B-b-but, un,…..I….want a vacation…." Deidara sniffled.

Sasori and Itachi sweat-dropped.

"PLEASE, DANNA?" Deidara said loudly.

Sasori stared at him blankly.

"You know, I said please, un" Deidara said, pointing out the obvious.

"I know you did."

Deidara frowned. This would not do He withdrew a giant explosive clay bird, that if detonated, would blow up the whole current residence and everyone in it.

"Vacation. Now." He said in a scary voice.

"Okay, okay, okay…." Itachi said quickly, "But not the pop-up one, okay? It probably is just a scam…"

"Fine." Deidara said. "I don't want to go to Europe, anyways."

The blonde thought for a moment. "I want to go to….AMARIKAT, un!"

"You mean America, right?" Sasori said, a bit confused.

"Yeah, un!" Deidara said, grinning broadly. "America."

"American where?" Itachi asked.

"CALIBORNEO, UN."

"California?"

"Yeah, that's it, un. California."

"California where?"

"SAINT DAYGUM, UN."

"San Diego."

"Yeah, I meant that, un…"

And so, with much to do, those few members of Akatsuki began to pack.

Zetsu was stuffing his suitcase with slabs of raw meat. Other than that, he didn't bring much else.

"San Diego has good beaches, and I have a cousin who lives in the Pacific Ocean," Kisame explained, loading his suitcase with beach toys and other….well…stuff.

Deidara and Itachi packed mostly hair care products and cosmetics.

And Sasori packed all the snacks and extra socks.

After packing, Itachi went to book plane tickets online. The rest of them sat around the living room, talking about the upcoming vacation.

"I wanna go to the Wild Beast Parts, un!" Deidara said happily.

"You mean, the Wild Animal Park?" Sasori corrected.

"Yeah, un…."

Obviously, Kisame was eager to hit every beach and visit his uncle at Seaworld.

While Zetsu was prepared to spend more time on fine dining at San Diego's many dinner options.

"Guys, I've booked tickets," Itachi said. "They'll be in the mail tomorrow, and our flight is this Friday at 7:00 AM."

Very, very, exciting indeed.

Next time: Will they make it in time for the flight? And, will Kisame and Zetsu be allowed aboard the plane?