SECRETS BEST KEPT
Draco lied to everyone, and he was safe only as long as he kept lying. He even lied to his mother, though Pansy suspected he only kept things from her that he believed would hurt or upset her. Narcissa Malfoy was cold, far colder than anyone knew. Pansy had run into her once in the middle of the night one holiday while she was slipping from Draco's room back to her own guest bedroom down the hall, her nightgown barely concealing her naked body underneath. Draco was spoiled by his mother, it was true, but Pansy was still terrified when those icy eyes spotted her pinned her back against the wall. Would she object to Draco smuggling girls into his bed, girls visiting on the pretense of needing a place to stay while her parents were out on business? Would she feel warmly toward Draco's girlfriend, or critical? In public Narcissa was nothing if not collected, welcoming, and open; she smiled warmly and looked at you encouragingly while you spoke, offered little sandwiches and never let your glass be empty. She didn't even use charmed glasses; she made sure to fill each glass herself, nodding and smiling and boring into your with those icy eyes filled with casual nonchalance, with boredom, with genial acceptance. Pansy had witnessed the other side of those too sweet eyes, and she never forgot it.
She had given Pansy a small locket with a tiny miniature rose inside as a birthday gift that year, with a card that read, "I'm so glad that Draco has such nice friends." Pansy had puzzled over it, confused, until she realized that Draco had not told his mother that they had a non-platonic relationship. He had explained to Pansy that his mother was very protective, that she would feel jealous if he were in a relationship.
Pansy had stood in the corridor at Malfoy manor at two o'clock in the morning face to face with Narcissa Malfoy. Of all the times to be caught, Pansy thought, this could not be worse. She smelled like she had just shagged, which she did, and like Draco, with marks in the shape of his lips and his teeth on her neck and her hair disheveled, bare feet sinking into the carpet in the half-light, her arms not able to hide enough of her nearly naked body. Pansy had left her housecoat in the guest room several hours before, she had tiptoed into Draco's room with the moonlight casting the shadows of her intimate parts against her flimsy nightie, watching Draco's bare torso shift, his arm pull open his bedclothes in an invitation. She had not considered the possibility of running into Draco's mother in the middle of the night, her purple silk housedress finely embroidered around the neck, with a newspaper tucked under her arm. Narcissa had raised one perfect eyebrow at Pansy (just like Draco), lifted her chin, and said, "Goodnight, Pansy dear," in a tone so cold she nearly shivered.
Ever since that night Narcissa Malfoy had become a figure of fear in Pansy's eyes. Just like Lucius and Draco, she could strike an unnerving pain in the pit of your stomach; well, not so much Draco, Pansy knew him too well... or so she thought. It was sixth year when Pansy found out that Draco wasn't the person she thought him to be at all.
It was nearing midnight when the blonde haired boy sat in the Slytherin common room. His hair was out of place and heavy bags were forming under his eyes. His pale skin was milkier and more ghostly looking than before. Clearly, something was bothering him. His eyes shifted nervously around the room, making sure that he was alone. He didn't want anyone, especially a small ebony haired witch, to see him in such a state.
The fire crackled over in the grate, causing a wave of heat to pass over the room. Sweat rolled down his creamy face, something he would normally cleanse with a spell; but tonight he was too nervous to bother. The guilt of his actions hung heavily over him while he thought about how she would be hurt when she found out what was really going on. He had never told her about his many days hiding out in the Room of Requirement or how what he told everyone on the train on the day back to start the new school year had been as much the truth that his last name was Malfoy. Surely she would forgive him for keeping his secrets away from her. Who knew how she'd react when she found out?
The young man had lied to many people before but never to her. She was his flower; one of the only things that kept him sane. He had friends to help him along the way but they never gave him the impression that they wanted to. She on the other hand, would run to his every whim; help him when he was in danger, care for him when he needed tending and act like a true friend would. But she was more than a friend. They were pushed together since they met at a very young age. At first he despised her; hated the thought of having her around but over the years, she grew on him.
In first year when Harry Potter tossed his dignity to the ground by disregarding his attempt at friendship, she was there to comfort him and heal the pain. The revenge he wanted ever so much was aided by tactics that she had come up with; plots to foil the 'Boy Who Lived'. None ever worked of course, but he enjoyed her attempts at helping him.
In second year when the Chamber of Secrets was reopened, the school was in an uproar. The girl was scared. Even though all of the attacks were on muggle-borns she couldn't help but think that she would be next. Night after night, she stayed up in the common room until everyone went to sleep. She would curl herself up on the couch, keeping her eyes wide open in fear that the monster would come for her. Fortunately, although she did not know it, someone was monitering her strange behavior. One night when she was staying on guard a familiar face came into the common room. He strode over and took a seat beside her on the couch. He ever-so-lightly wrapped his arm around her and told her it would be alright and that as long as he was around, she would be safe. This comforted her very much and she went back to her old routine of going to bed like any normal person instead of wasting the night away fearing that a monster would take her life.
In third year he was attacked by a hippogryph in Care for Magical Creatures class. His arm was pretty banged up and he had to be taken to the hospital wing. She stayed by his side the whole time and nursed him whenever she got the chance. When his arm got better, his father made sure that the beast was taken care of. It was to be beheaded; which brought joy to both of them. Although somehow the beast escaped which they were sure was Harry Potter's doing.
In fourth year he escorted her to the Yule Ball that was held in honor of the Tri-Wizard Tournament. She was disgusted with the robes her mother had sent her, which just so happened to be pink and frilly. Although she hated them, he thought they made her look cute and enjoyed a night of dancing. It got monotonous at one point so he decided they should go back to the common room. They sat around and talked the night away until out of nowhere, he kissed her. He didn't know what brought it on, he knew that kissing his best friend was wrong but at the same time, it felt so right to him. After that night, their relationship blossomed into something beautiful. In public they were still the same stony faced Slytherins who poked fun at people whenever they got the chance but they both knew that they had something more. She was no longer the single, back talking fallen angel who scared boys just by staring at them and he was no longer the handsome, chivalrous bachelor who never stayed with a girl longer than a week. What they had was real even if no one else could see it.
In fifth year, they became prefects together. Aside from having to work with the Gryffindors from time to time, they truly had fun. They abused their privileges by giving out detentions for no real reasons and used their positions to their advantage by walking the corridors late at night. They also became members of the Inquisitorial Squad that was set up by Professor Umbridge. This gave them the perfect opportunity to take points away from the other houses. The year was going exactly as planned until the incident at the Ministry of Magic and his father was taken away to Azkaban. That was when everything changed.
Over the summer he had gained something he always wanted: The Dark Mark. Now he was a death eater but he had to prove himself to Voldemort; show that he was trustworthy. The Dark Lord was a cruel man but never had he thought that his task would be so difficult. The one thing he had to obtain was something that was thought of to be impossible: killing Dumbledore. The headmaster of the school which had become his home over the years had to fall before his own hand or who knows what would happen to him. The Dark Lord would probably kill him, his family and anyone remotely close to him; including Pansy. He couldn't let this happen. The only way out was to complete the task, no matter how risky it was.
The boy slowly ran his hand over his left arm, caressing it as gently as he could. Little did he know that he was being watched…
A petite girl was sitting on the bottom step of the staircase leading up to the dormitories. She was staring intently at him, trying to decipher what the look on his face was. Was it worry? No, he never was worried about anything. Could it be fear? Again, no. The boy in question had never shown fear in all his life; he masked it with the stony persona he withheld in public. In all truth, she didn't know how wrong she was. Quietly, she stood up and trudged over to the couch he was sitting on. He took no notice of her until she sat down and cuddled in next to him. Shocked, he stared at her with a look of concern in his stormy eyes.
"Pansy?" He half whispered in confusion, "What are you doing down here?"
"The better question is Draco, what are you doing down here?" The girl replied sitting up to look into his eyes.
"How did you know I was down here?" Draco asked quietly, shifting so he was facing her.
"I couldn't sleep, so I went to your dorm to see if you were awake so I would have someone to talk to but you weren't there. This was a week ago Draco." She said softly although the boy just furrowed his brow in confusion. "I've been watching you from the bottom stair every night for a week, and every night you worry me even more. You sit down here as quiet as a ghost rubbing your arm and shifting your eyes like you have something to hide. You always looked worried and you let your appearance go to Merlin. I know you Draco, and that's not like you."
"Look Pansy, you have to understand that-" He began but she silenced him by placing a finger over his lips.
"What's there to understand Draco? You have been ignoring me since term started, I barely saw you at all this summer and now it's almost time for Christmas break. What's happening to you?"
"Pansy, if you will just let me explain…" He paused for a moment to stare at the girl. She solemnly nodded her head in a silent yes before he continued, "I'm sorry I haven't been spending much time with you. I've been really busy lately. And it's not that I don't want to spend time with you, I really do, it's just that my life is really complicated right now. If you only knew…" He enclosed her small hands in his, making sure to take in her warmth. "Lately, I haven't been telling you the whole truth-"
"You don't tell me anything anymore, let alone the truth-"
"Please, just hear me out. Over the summer, I was faced with a decision that would change my entire life. When my father was taken to Azkaban last year, the Dark Lord wanted something in return for losing his right hand man. That something was a new recruit who he could train to be better than my father and hopefully be able to finish off Harry Potter and rid the world of the muggle-borns who are polluting our blood. That something he wanted…was me." Pansy let out a small gasp.
"No. Draco, tell me it's not true." She whispered, almost close to tears. Draco shut his eyes and reached over for his left sleeve. He slowly pulled it up revealing the last thing Pansy ever wanted to see. He felt Pansy run her fingers along it over and over until a tiny drop of water fell on it. He opened his eyes to see Pansy crying quietly. He reached out and lifted her chin so their eyes met.
"Don't cry love," He spoke sweetly, "It will all be over soon. My task should be finished in no time."
"What task?" Pansy sobbed. Draco sighed before speaking again.
"I have to kill Dumbledore." He said in a voice barely audible. She didn't reply but continued to cry harder than before. Draco planted a delicate kiss on her cheek before laying her down in his lap.
Time ticked by and eventually Pansy cried herself to sleep. Draco stroked her hair as he stared at her pale figure in through the darkness. She looked so serene, much unlike an hour or so ago. Her face had softened and her tears had dried.
"That's it," Draco whispered into the darkened common room, "I can't lie to her anymore. By not telling her the truth I'm only hurting her; although I knew this secret was one best kept."
A/N: Hello everyone. This is actually a one-shot inspired by some paragraphs of writing that Princess Emerald sent me. I credit the first three paragraphs to her because I didn't write those but the rest is mine. She asked me to turn them into a fic for her so this is what I came up with. Once again, a little more on the serious side but there's nothing wrong with a little angst now and then. No I did not fall off of the face of this little Harry Potter universe, I was drug away for a week of day trips and then a week of camping. Sorry it's been awhile since I wrote anything but now i'm back on track and a new chapter of SOAS should be up soon. Until net time...Aspen