"Sasuke Lovers Anonymous"
by the Carpet Shampoo
Disclaimer: Naruto 1z 0wn3d0rz 8y 50m30n3 /\/\u(h 5m4r73r 7h4n m3. (347 7h47 n0085!!!!!!!)
Author's Commentary: Yes I am still going to keep working on The Courting and Monster. I just need to write this before I lose the idea. Ph34r m`/ 1d34. (I am so annoying...)
Prologue: The Final Meeting
"This is Haruno Sakura; testing one-two…Ino-pig, hold that camera straight! This is very important! I repeat this is Haruno Sakura, president of Sasuke Lovers Anonymous, reporting that this is our last ever meeting…SLA is no more as of today…For today is the day of a great tragedy has occurred in the town of Konoha. Witnessed by Hyuuga Hinata, SLA's very own treasurer, this tragedy…this monstrosity…I'm sorry, I just can't speak. Tenten, take over please…"
"This is Tenten…secretary of Sasuke Lovers Anonymous. I was the third to join this wonderful team dedicated to the one and only Sasuke, and I am proud to say I was a member. Ino dear, that camera looks really crooked…try turning it a little to the left….No, now its worse. Never mind, as Sakura-chan already stated, a great tragedy has struck the SLA members today…Today, Hinata, the newest member of SLA, was casually walking the streets of Konoha…I'm getting there Ino, hold your horses. When all of the sudden, she experienced a SSS! That's a sudden Sasuke sighting, for the record."
"You're taking way too long! This is Yamanaka Ino; here with the real story…I gave the camera to Hinata, you big forehead-ed dimwit! How would I be able to hold the camera and be on at the same time!? Ahem. As I said, this is Yamanaka Ino, vice-president of the one and only Sasuke Lovers Anonymous! As the other two have attempted to say, today when strolling the streets of Konoha, Hyuuga Hinata had a sudden Sasuke sighting! Needless to say, she should have contacted the other members right away and – "
"Move over Ino-pig! I was telling the story first!"
"Make me Sakura-big forehead!"
"Guys, stop fighting! I was telling the story too! Hey – guys!"
"Um…hello. This is Hyuuga Hinata. I'm the treasurer of Sasuke Lovers Anonymous…I don't really love Sasuke, but I joined anyway. Because Sakura-chan and Ino-chan said that everyone loves Sasuke…And they needed a treasurer…But I'm mourning the loss of this tragedy of Konoha too…Because um…well…Naruto was kind of involved too…and you see…Naruto-kun is…"
"Hey Hinata, no one cares about Naruto! Move over, we're talking about Sasuke! This is Tenten again, reporting on this tragedy for our closing meeting. As I said, Hinata had just had a total SSS, but who should ruin her lovely sight, but that jerk Naruto! He comes out of no where and completely starts talking to Sasuke as if they're friends or something!"
"As if!"
"He wishes…"
"Guys…that's mean…"
"Ahem, as I was saying, Naruto and Sasuke we're just standing around talking, when all of the sudden, Naruto starts walking away. I'm sure Hinata was thinking this was good, because that blond haired loser was probably totally blocking her view of Sasuke!"
"You take way too long Tenten! I'm the president, I'll finish the story. Hmph…For some reason, Sasuke actually began following that blond little jerk! Rule number 7 of the SLA states that anywhere Sasuke goes, a club member should be following! As Hinata was the only club member around, she followed…Shut it Ino, the camera does not make my forehead look bigger! As I was saying, Hinata followed Sasuke and the jerk, right into the forest. Hinata, would you like to give a full report, for the record, of what you saw?"
"All right…I stood back and used my Byakugan in order to see what was going on. And well…at first it looked like Naruto and Sasuke we're just fighting…I mean, Sasuke slammed Naruto up against a tree, and then Naruto tackled Sasuke to the ground…"
"And then they totally started making out!"
"Tenten! Hinata was telling the story…"
"Sorry Sakura…"
"But its true! One minute they were fighting, the next they were…you know…"
"Sasuke-kun! How could you?!"
"Be quiet Ino-pig!"
"President Sakura, what are we going to do…?"
"Tenten…as your final act as secretary, will you fetch all the old tapes and notes? We need to discover when and where this happened. It shall be our final tribute to Sasuke."
"To Sasuke!"
"To Sasuke!"
"To N- I mean, to Sasuke!"
Author's Commentary: No, not everything wil be in this format. The writing style will be a bit strange and this prologue is pretty short, but I will be back! With more ficcage! Ph34r my ficcage! And sorry…I'll stop speaking l337 too…