"Sasuke Lovers Anonymous"
By the Carpet Shampoo
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor any of its characters
Author's Commentary: So I was searching for SasuNaru or NaruSasu fics this morning and I found nothing that I hadn't already read or that looked interesting. It was quite perplexing. So I thought to myself, 'Hey! Why don't I update? This way, at least all the other SasuNaru fans don't have to suffer through what I did.' And with that in mind, here's Sasuke Lovers Anonymous.
Chapter 3: Something in the Air…
This is Yamanaka Ino, Vice President of Sasuke Lovers Anonymous, reporting for this meeting. Last Sasuke sighting was a bust, ruined as always by that stupid Naruto. We have discussed in full these events and have decided that Sasuke untied Naruto and helped him escape only because Sasuke was taking him elsewhere to heroically beat him up because he didn't want blood on the carpet. Oh Sasuke….so noble and so hygienic. Today we continue our search for Sasuke. Our sources tell us he was seen with Naruto, going off into the woods. No doubt to spar so Sasuke can show off his superior skills against Naruto by beating him into a bloody pulp. Sasuke Lovers Anonymous shall cover the play by play here.
The woods were an excellent grounds for training and sparring and have been used by many shinobi throughout time and are continued to use by all shinobi off every age and skill level to this day. The tall trees provided shade from the sun, which helped when the fights got particularly intense in the heat. Cool streams ran through to practice water-related jutsus or just to get a cool drink from. Trees and bushes provided excellent coverage for moving through the shadows to catch your opponent by surprise….or, if you happened to be a member of Sasuke Lovers Anonymous, they provided excellent coverage for spying on two boys who were sparring in the forest that day…
"Keep your voice down Tenten," Sakura hissed as she elbowed the older girl in the sides. Tenten 'hmphed' softly, she hadn't been able to resist letting out a little squeal when they had finally found Sasuke deep in the woods. But they couldn't spend too much time arguing amongst themselves - they might miss a few precious seconds of Sasuke watching time.
Hinata tried to keep her focus on Sasuke. She really did. But with her Hyuuga vision, it was hard not to notice the blond boy as well. Sure, Sasuke was cool and handsome. Even the Hyuuga heir had to admit that. But watching them fight, she noticed that Naruto fought with emotion, with passion….how could anyone watch Sasuke when Naruto was so close by, looking so determined in those beautiful sky blue eyes? At least she could turn her head to face Sasuke while focusing on Naruto. Thank goodness for Hyuuga vision!
Silence fell over the three girls as they sat and watched intensely. Sakura began to squirm uncomfortably. Ino was next, fidgeting and squirming. Tenten scooted back a little looking back and forth. Hinata just turned bright red.
"Are boys…supposed to fight that way?" Sakura whispered.
"Don't ask me…Shikamaru and Chouji never fight like that. Come to think of it, they never spar at all. Lazy bums."
"I don't think Neji and Lee would fight that way…"
"K-Kiba-kun and Shino would never…"
The four girls watched in disbelief at the site before them. Naruto had quite suddenly tackled Sasuke, pinning him to the ground. Sasuke, instead of pushing the other boy off, was smirking at the blond straddled over his hips. Naruto leaned in and whispered something to Sasuke, who promptly flipped the fox boy off him, and pinned him down. Hinata turned red and had to look away. Seeing Sasuke straddling Naruto…was this normal? Maybe Kiba and Shino acted this way when she wasn't around.
She tried to picture Kiba on top of Shino that way. Hm…that wasn't right. But it didn't seem right with Shino on top either.
"This is screaming for an intervention." Sakura declared. She looked at the three other girls.
"Ino-pig, you're the most obnoxious, go get Sasuke off Naruto before they start questioning their sexuality."
"Roger that." Ino stood up, looking determined. With a shrill war-cry of 'Sasuke-kun!' the blonde girl ran towards the two boys, gathering momentum, and lunging at Sasuke, knocking him right off Naruto.
Sasuke looked startled for a moment, seemingly unabled to comprehend why he was suddenly in close contact with a different blond haired, blue eyed person, but it only took a second for him to regain composure and shove Ino off him.
"Lay off Ino. We were in the middle of something."
"Oh?" said Ino, "And what exactly did I interrupt?"
"Sparring." Naruto piped up, sitting up. He gave Ino a large lopsided grin while he scratched his head to get twigs and leaves out.
"No one asked you ramen-breath," Ino shot back. Naruto opened his mouth to retort but Ino interrupted. "Besides…it didn't look like sparring from here. It looked like some good gossip to start a few rumors with. Unless of course, you go out with me, to prove you and Naruto aren't….involved."
Sasuke shrugged nonchalantly as he stood up. He walked over to Naruto and stuck out one hand, hoisting the fox boy to his feet. He glared at Ino, still holding Naruto's hand.
"Start your rumor then Ino. Maybe Naruto and I will even help it along." Sasuke dropped the other boy's hand and started off, shoving his hands in his pockets.
"Uh-oh Ino, looks like he's pissed now. Hey, Sasuke, wait up!" Naruto jogged after the dark haired boy. Ino just sat there in the dirt in disbelief. What the heck had Sasuke meant by "helping her rumors along?" Surely, he wouldn't ruin his own reputation like that, would he?
Ino shook her head. Sasuke was just trying to mess with her. Oh she'd start her rumors. And then Sasuke would see she was serious. Then he'd HAVE to date her.
It was all just a matter of time…
This is the perpetually confused Hyuuga Hinata, here to report on the plan concocted by Yamanaka Ino. I don't think I quite understand her plan, but I will attempt to explain it the best I can. After the Encounter with Sasuke in the Woods, in which Ino had to intervene, our Vice-President approached us with a plan. We were to spread the rumor that Sasuke and Naruto were involved in a romantic sense. When Sasuke hears this, he will realize he has to prove his heterosexuality, and will in return, date one of us. I know its not my place to say…but somehow, I don't get a good feeling about this plan.
Author's Commentary: Yes, Yes, I know. It should have been updated months ago. I'm sorry. I really am. Please still love me.
Shameless Plug: I am currently part of two rp's. Both are Naruto yaoi AUs. Hikari tai Yami is in full swing, but some characters (even some main characters, like Kakashi and Tsunade) are still open. Its an advanced, elitest snob rp (just kidding!) but its fun. Stop by and check us out at This is a mild yaoi rp which has somehow come to include some crack hetero pairings. Please stop by and check us out and make sure to read the rules/contact me for rules.
If mild yaoi isn't your thing, we opened a brand new AU rp (in which I am Naruto), which will include much more blatent and hardcore yaoi. Once again, its open to more advanced rp-ers. This role play has not yet begun yet, but the basic story line is up and we're waiting for more characters to join. So far, Sasuke, Naruto, Itachi, Gaara and possibly Shikamaru and Iruka are taken. Please visit Hehe. And I designed the layout, so make sure to at least check that out!