WTH, I didn't see this coming, it certainly is not what I had in mind or even remotely planned, but Addison seemed to make me do it.

Recovery

Part IV

"I'm sorry."

Meredith's head snapped in the direction where the voice had come from, "Excuse me?"

Addison Montgomery had been leaning on the back of the elevator when Meredith Grey entered. Addison had been shocked by the sight of Meredith, she had always been thin, but she seemed almost sickly now, more fragile. She had known from hospital gossip that Meredith and Derek were not together. For the two weeks since she walked away from Derek, she had purposely avoided both Derek and Meredith. The last time she had spoken to him was two days ago, only because she wanted to give him a copy of the divorce decree in person, she figured that was the least she could do. It was a simple exchange. She had knocked on the door, he called for her to enter, she handed him the paper. He simply nodded at her and asked her if there was anything else. Addison slowly walked to the elevator control panel and pushed the stop button. She turned back to Meredith looked her in the eye and calmly stated, "I said I was sorry."

Meredith was stunned, why on earth would Addison Montgomery be apologizing to her. She stared at the other woman and shrugged, "Why on earth would you be apologizing to me? You should be screaming at me and scratching out my eyes." She braced herself; she might be giving her ideas.

Addison threw her head back and let out a hoarse laugh. Then looked Meredith straight in the eye again, "Don't get me wrong, I'm no saint two weeks ago I would have be screaming and ranting and scratching your eyes out," she gave her a smirk. "I've had a lot of time to think lately. I stood back and took a good look at myself, and I didn't like what I saw." She paused and took a more serious tone, "And don't think that I am saying your affair with Derek was okay, it wasn't. Just like my affair with Mark wasn't ok. No one here should get a free pass." Then she looked Meredith straight in the eye again, "I should have let go sooner, I was kidding myself. Instead of facing that my marriage was over, I stuck my head in the sand and pretended like everything was okay." She gave a small shrug and said, "I just wanted you know I was sorry, because my actions hurt you. I want to be able to move forward with my life and put this last year behind me." She gave her a tight smile, "And part of my be able to move on, is accepting my responsibility in this mess. So, I'm sorry." With that she pushed the start button on the elevator.

"Thank you Addison." It was Meredith's turn to push the stop button, "But I owe you an apology too." She took a deep breath and continued, "I owe you an apology and you are right I should not get a pass for sleeping with your husband, and I apologize. I should never have slept with your husband. You had pointedly asked me the day before if I were sleeping with your husband and I said no. And it was true then. I was being honest, I hadn't slept with Derek then, but little more then twenty-four hours later I was a liar." A tear escaped and trickled down her cheek, "I was a liar and I slept with your husband. I never wanted to be that woman. I never wanted to be the dirty little mistress, but that is what I became, the dirty little mistress and I'm sorry, I'm sorry I destroyed your marriage."

Addison hit the start button again and said, "Don't be so hard on yourself Meredith; there really wasn't much of a marriage left to destroy. The real damage was done a very longtime ago," she reached out and put her hand on Meredith's shoulder and gave it a little reassuring squeeze. To her surprise Meredith reached out and pulled her into a hug and she started to cry. Addie rubbed her back and comforted her, "Just give it time. I promise things will get better."

The doors to the elevator slid open revealing the unusual encounter. George and Cristina standing before the elevator they both stood open mouthed. Meredith and Addison both exited and said in unison, "What are you all looking at?"

"No . . . Nothing," George said.

"The apocalypse?" Cristina smiled back at Meredith. Cristina hooked her arm in Meredith's and guided her away, "What that heck was that about?" she whispered.

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