Where You Hang Your Hat Chapter 18: Part XVIII, a kim possible fanfic

Where You Hang Your Hat: Part XVIII

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Ron knew he was going to catch it. It wasn't like he had been doing anything all that wrong, but it was one in the morning and he did tell Kim he was going to be home around eleven. Of course she would believe him that he let time get away from him over at Paul's apartment playing video games since that was the honest truth and she could trust him never to lie about such things, but that would do nothing to relieve the anger she would be feeling toward him once he got upstairs.

His only hope was to go the old-fashioned route of sneaking up into the room without making any sound. Some of his ninja training was useful in that regard, but he really never got all that much chance to practice it. Any of that would be for naught if she was still awake and since she really wasn't all that used to him spending time out with his friends, she very likely would be.

All the lights being off in the house was a good sign. Their room faced the road, but unlike when it had just been Kim's, the blinds stayed closed much more often. That didn't keep him from seeing only a dim light, probably one of the nightstand lamps, were on. There was still hope for him. She often fell asleep sitting, reading or working on something for school. He could just imagine her sitting in the bed, pretending to peruse some glossy girly magazine, all the while checking he watch, wondering where he was.

Since the room was directly over the front door, he decided the kitchen door around back was the best way to go. Of course, he would have to enter his code on the pad back there, or risk setting off the main burglar alarm, but then only Wade would know of his comings or goings and, if the last few years had been any indication, he steered well clear of keeping tabs on the two unless they were in mission mode.

Ron knew that kitchen like he knew the back of his hand. He was a study of pure silence as he gently pushed the door closed and latched it. It sure felt strange to be sneaking into what was technically his own home, but the last thing he wanted was to get into it with Kim. They may have had a very healthy, loving relationship, but that didn't mean they were free from having the occasional spat. Make that occasional scream-fest. At heart, Kim was very strictly regimented, orderly (anal, he would sometimes say) while he would only allow enough structure into his life to function. When his responsibilities were fulfilled, it was time to kick back and relax, letting the world come to him. He loved Kim with all his heart, but sometimes she needed to be told to chill. On the other hand, she sometimes had to tell him to get his head in the game.

He did have his lapses. Like right at that moment, in the midst of trying to be as silent as a nighttime breeze, he couldn't help but recall there was a pack of chocolate fudge popsicles in the freezer. Paul had some food over at his place, but since he kept strictly kosher, it wasn't exactly what Ron would consider proper 'snackage.'

They had decided to chip in with the groceries, especially since that gave them the opportunity to stock up on some of their own favorites. The only drawback was that Jim and Tim tended to like a lot of the same junk he did, so the popsicles were hidden behind something the twins knew better than to touch – two quarts of fudge ripple ice cream. That was one of Kim's few real vices.

As quietly as he could, he pried the door open, hoping the hinges wouldn't squeak. He even had a plan for keeping her from noticing the chocolaty goodness on his breath. He'd stop at the bathroom and thoroughly brush his teeth first. He would have to do that anyway, after eating several pastrami on pumpernickel sandwiches.

Ron was reaching for the yellow box when he realized what was wrong. It was sitting in plain view, unhidden.

Uh oh.

Kim normally allowed herself one scoop after dinner, just as he was only allowed to have one popsicle, if he was an otherwise good boy. The ice cream had only been in the house since the afternoon before and nobody else was dumb enough to get into Kim's private stash. That meant only one thing…

…Kim was on an ice cream binge.

That usually meant she was upset about something, but keeping it inside. She would start by having just a bowl, then another. Before long she would have the whole quart container out, digging even the last vestiges of the sticky brown fudge from the corners of the cardboard bucket. One quart missing was a bad sign.

Two meant he was in a bucket load of trouble.

He eyeballed the couch over in the family room. Somehow that seemed significantly more appealing than the nice soft (if small) bed waiting for him upstairs in their room. He was figuring if he could get upstairs, out of his clothes and into the bed without waking her, he could then gently nudge her for a goodnight kiss. Perhaps then she would want to celebrate her triumph with the thesis committee. If not, they could snuggle down, keeping warm since the home's air conditioning was set particularly low. If Kim was tweaked enough with him that she had gone through both containers…

He shut the door, the popsicles forgotten. Hanging his head, he mounted the stairs. He got as far as the hatch, his hand hesitating on the latch. Maybe if it was locked… That would be a signal that she was so torqued she didn't even want to speak to him that evening. It would certainly be a reprieve, at least until morning when both of them were rested and ready to discuss his shortcomings in a calm, collected manner.

There was only one way. Taking a deep breath and holding it, he reached for the latch. As his hands closed on the lever, he heard snoring. Kim had a tendency to snore sometimes. Actually, she could saw some pretty good logs when she got going. When that happened, he just had to poke her in the ribs a couple times and she'd roll over, silencing her grinding breathing, at least long enough for him to fall into his customary deep sleep.

He pulled the lever, which surprisingly opened all the way. Slowly he pushed the hatch open, thankful the Teflon coated hinges weren't prone to squeaking. What was waiting for him in the room was an even bigger surprise than he was expecting.

Kim was sound asleep, and empty ice cream container still sitting on her belly. She was wearing one of his old red jerseys, the one her Mom had re-stitched so it would fit her more correctly. Her bare legs were stretched out on top of the comforter, meaning she had pretty much fallen asleep like that.

The big surprise was that she wasn't in the bed alone. Joss was there too, a spoon clutched to her pajama covered chest. It wasn't Kim who was snoring, but her younger cousin. The second empty container was sitting nearby on the floor.

He was aware of the strife between the two of them over the last week. Ron could only suppose that the two of them had finally found some way to bury the hatchet, and in the process had settled into an extended 'girl-talk' session. A little smile crept across his lips, knowing he was going to be spared. There was every likelihood Kim didn't even realize he was out so late.

As quietly as he could, he grabbed his night shorts and tiptoed back to the hatch, closing it gently so the latch would not click. Rufus popped out of his cargo pocket and yawned, stretching his short arms as Ron headed for the bathroom to change.

"Looks like it's couch time, buddy."

Rufus shrugged, climbing up on the lavatory to brush his own teeth before heading off to bed. It probably would have been fair for him to take Joss' bed in exchange, but he wasn't going to invade a teenaged girl's room, even if he had lived in there himself for a while two summers back.

Ah, the joys of being male he thought to himself as he got the blanket out of the hall closet for the first time in recent memory.

Anne had always been something of a light sleeper. Part of that came with having children. When they were younger, she would get up in the middle of the night and make her rounds, much like when she had done her residency many years earlier. She still did much the same, though she would no longer check on her sleeping children directly. The boys were sixteen, and even though they still shared a room, they had grown a little more secretive and private. If they had not been identical twins, they very likely would have begged for their own individual rooms by that point. It was certainly going to be interesting when they got a little older and started going their separate ways with their girlfriends

She respected Kim's and Ron's privacy for the obvious reasons. When they would occasionally share a bed together when they were younger, the doors would be left unlocked, or even completely open, which had been Kim's custom for most of her life. Both parents would look in on them from time to time. She did simply because it made her heart glad to finally see the two of them together. James would do so making certain his future son-in-law was being a gentleman. To her there was nothing embarrassing about accidentally interrupting them now that they were officially completely together, but the younger couple did not exactly feel the same way, which was understandable. Still, locks were occasionally forgotten and accidents had happened, so she simply, wisely chose not to bother entering during the night.

Her normal soft smile disappeared completely when she got down to the first floor. When she had an early rotation at the Medical Center, she would go ahead and set up the coffee maker, so the automatic timer would have a nice, fresh pot waiting for her when she got up. She didn't get as far as the kitchen when she spotted Ron and Rufus fast asleep on the couch.

That hadn't happened since early spring, when the two of them had let a minor disagreement boil over into a full blown fight. Then it wasn't surprising he had spent the night downstairs, considering the volume of their tiff. If it had happened any earlier he would have likely walked to his parents house and spent the night there.

Kim's and Ron's relationship was good and solid, but like any two human beings living together, it was not perfect. That they were deeply in love could not be denied, but they did sometimes manage to rub the other the wrong way. Part of that came from the fact they spent just so much time together, as if they couldn't stand being apart any longer than their classes required. That was definitely something the two of them would have to work on. Eventually they would have separate careers, keeping them apart throughout the day, and even longer if they were called out of town for an extended business trip. Anne didn't like when that happened between her and James, but it was necessary, and their reunions were always…quite nice.

She sat down on the easy chair, crossing her legs and wondering if she should bother the young man. In his sleep, he didn't seem upset. The night of the fight he spent tossing and turning, grimacing when he actually did get some sleep. Instead he looked peaceful and comfortable, sleeping soundly. Rufus was curled up in a pink little ball on his chest, his tiny head nestled in the crook of his arm.

Sighing quietly, she decided to let the poor boy sleep. If something was wrong between the two of them, they would sort it out shortly. It wasn't any of her business, really, though she still had a burning curiosity about what it was.

Well, she had to be up in three hours anyway. The pieces would have to fall where they may. If he was half-awake or tossing, she would have felt better about waking him, perhaps chasing him up the stairs to either get in bed with Kim or hash out whatever was coming between them. Their relationship was almost as important to her as it was to them. Anne had a secret desire to become a grandmother before she turned fifty.

She tried to ease her mind as she climbed the stairs back to her room. There were plenty of nights before Kim came along that James spent on the couch. Sometimes it did a couple good to work things through. They certainly would have a better time of it than they did, considering their relationship with Ron's Rabbi. At that stage of their lives, they were going through a period where church was just not important to them, cutting them off from that kind of guidance, if it even existed in that form. Gerry Katz was one of those rare religious leaders who cared more for his congregation as people than how many of them were in the pews on Saturday or Sunday morning.

Even with that kind of mental reassurance, she went back to sleep with a troubled mind.

Ron was having one of those types of dreams that seemed incredibly pleasant, but would fade the moment he awakened. Something was really nice, and his mind was not quite willing to let go of it. He had the image of soft, closely manicured fingers brushing his hair back from his forehead. Grinning, a particular question he often asked early in the morning escaped his lips.

"KP, would you like a little wake-up call this morning?"

He opened his eyes as the dream fled back into his subconscious. A green-eyed face framed with auburn red hair, drawn back into a ponytail, was smiling down at him. Kim was in the process of running her fingers through his hair, holding his head in her lap.

It took him a moment, but he slowly realized he was not in their room, but on the family room couch. Not only that, but he was not alone with her. He glanced down, noting that Joss was sitting there, with his lower legs draped across her lap. He turned a rather becoming shade of pink, hoping the younger Possible didn't quite know what that particular question actually meant.

He looked back up at Kim, who was blushing herself. That was when he realized that her father was sitting now four feet away in his easy chair, glaring at him over the top of his newspaper. He obviously realized what a 'little wake-up call' entailed.

"Good morning to you too, Ronald." He kept his glared centered on the young man a moment more, barely getting his paper back up before breaking out in a wide smile, enjoying a tiny bit of torture directed at him.

"What time is it?" He sat up, conscious that he was shirtless. Joss grinned at him a moment, then set about tickling the bottom of his feet.

"Ow, quit that!" He tried pulling away, but she grabbed one of his ankles with her loose hand, fully intent on her own brand of early-morning torture.

"It's a quarter of eight." Kim said, leaning over and giving him a light kiss. "You know, you could have gotten us up when you got home."

"I, uh, well."

"Ronnie, you weren't in trouble."

"Sorry, KP. Looked a little too pajama party in there last night. All that ice cream, painted toenails…"

"Well, you coulda woke us up and had a pilla fight with us." Joss was still hanging onto his ankle, though she finally relented on the tickling.

He shook his head. "There are some things guys just shouldn't do, and pillow fights…that's something you watch on cable."

James' paper drooped down once more. "I'm not about to get a nasty surprise from pay-per-view, am I?"

"No, no sir, uh, uh." He pleaded, looking straight into Kim's glaring eyes.

"You're sweet anyway." She gave him another kiss, lingering a tad longer that time. "So, what do you want to do today? It's your last day to be with an older woman for a while, you know."

He finally got his feet free from Joss' grasp, turning and sitting up properly. "Lake?"

"Uh, uh. Storms this afternoon."

"Then how 'bout the pool. We can hit that this morning before the storms get here, then maybe we could hit the mall for a little while."

"No can do, baby. This is your birthday and I don't want to go broke while you pick out everything under the sun."

"Hey, if it's my choice, how come the mall's out?"

"Cause you're just saying that because I like to shop, and don't bother fibbing that it's not."

Ron glanced at Kim, then to her Dad, then back to her. A wicked little smile sprang to life, but she leaned over, whispering softly in his ear. "Daddy's off from work today, if you know what I mean."

"Oh." He whispered back, enduring yet another little glare from the elder Possible.

"What's the name a that western style town up in the mountains?" Joss asked. "The one with all the old timey steam trains? That would be just spankin!"

"Durango?" Kim asked. "That's a two hour drive from here, and it's so…touristy." They knew the place well, having gone there on several occasions, though the last time, a couple years earlier they barely even left their room. It was the last day of their first big trip together and they wanted to get away from town after recovering from the mission that vacation had turned into.

"Actually, I think Durango would be badical! Joss could dress up in her cowgirl stuff…heck, we could borrow your folk's country line-dancing stuff."

"Oh no! No way! I couldn't show my face if anyone actually saw me like that."

James leaned forward. "You could always tell everyone you're Wanda and Eugene Krumholtz, no relation to Kim Possible of Middleton College."

"Works for me." Ron said. "My middle name's Eugene anyway."

"Hey, I was just talkin bout the two of you. I got no business…"

"Yes, you are. It's my birthday and I want both of you with me. Lemme just run upstairs and take a shower and we can load up the car."

"I don't know." Kim still looked dubious.

"Please." Ron tilted his head, opening his eyes up as wide as they would go, pushing his lower lip out as far as it would go, looking for all the world like he was about to start blubbering."

"No…way! Ron! You can't…THAT' MINE!" Kim hung her mouth open in abject shock.

"Oh my lord, let me get the camera. Ronald, you've got Kimmie-cub's pout thing nailed! Kudos on the realism." James laughed.

Kim held up her hands in defeat. "Oh, this is just so wrong. Okay, we'll drive up to Durango, but there is no way I'm going to wear that western stuff. I'd look like Drakken when he took over the Crooked D."

Joss giggled loudly, recalling the blue-skinned villain, dressed from head to toe in what had to be the silliest fake western wear she had seen in her life.

"Oh, you're going too, Joss." Kim wagged her finger.

"Ah'll get my hat." She said, hopping off the couch and heading for her room."

Kim followed Ron up the steps to their room. He didn't so much as get his bathrobe out before Kim grabbed him, crashing down on the bed with him.

"So, what trouble did you and your buddies get into last night?" She brushed his hair back again, between little kisses."

He held his fingers barely apart. "I'm getting this close to beating his score on GWA Slam-fest."

"That's what I love about you. You're so full of childlike wonder." She kissed him again, resting her weight on him. "Oh, by the way, you know what?"

"What?"

"I do want a little wake-up call. Joss can wait a little bit."

"Boo-yah!" He got out, before she kissed him once more.