Vyser: I'm back…sooner than last time for sure. So I wanted to apologize for not really updating regularly. But that's not for now, time to rid this chapter of the disclaimer. I don't own Kingdom Hearts or the Final Fantasy characters. Now on with the chapter's humor.
/// ------ -------- -------- ------ ----- - // --------- ------- -------- ------- --///
Chapter 26: Pet Pranks/-------- --------- ---------- ------- ---- /----------- -------- -------- -------- //
It was the beginning of December on Destiny Isles, and as with the rest of the world, the residents were busily preparing for Christmas time. We find near the shopping districts Yuffie carrying many shopping bags walking near a pet store going out of business.
"Man, I can't wait to see the looks on my friends faces when I give them these presents," said Yuffie as she sat down on a bench in front of the pet store. "Especially Zeek and Sora, I stole their wallets again to buy most of this stuff."
"Hey girl!" yelled a voice as Yuffie turned to see whom the voice belonged to. The voice came from the pet storeowner. "Looks like you've been doing a lot of shopping."
"Yeah, and I've still got munny to get something big," Yuffie replied before the storeowner pulled her into the store.
"Then I've got the perfect gift you can give to a friend," said the storeowner as he led Yuffie to a cage that had a bigger than usual armadillo that looked to a deep crimson and had two fangs sticking out of it's closed mouth. "I'd like you to meet Red Green the saber tooth armadillo. He's the last animal I've got in this store, then when he's gone, I'll be free to sell the store."
"I don't see how I can help, I don't even want to buy this armadillo," Yuffie replied as the storeowner looked sad.
"Please, I'll throw in anything you want," begged the storeowner as he got to his knees. "I'll even throw in my shoes!"
"Okay fine, I'll take the armadillo and your shoes," Yuffie said as she handed the munny to the storeowner.
"Thank you!" thanked the storeowner as he gave his shoes and the armadillo to Yuffie. "Now get out of here, this place is scheduled to become a star bucks in two minutes."
"Well, I've better get out of here," Yuffie said before she was pulled by Red Green the armadillo out of the store. "Heel boy!"
/// ------ ------- ----- ---------- ---- // -------- ------ ---- -------- ----- /
An hour later at Sora's house, Sora, Riku, Kairi, Cloud, and Aries were all helping Zeek (with some resentment) study for his ACT test that was going to be in one week.
"Zeek, I don't get how you understand this trigonometry," said Sora as he looked at the book Zeek was studying from.
"You will…someday," Zeek replied not turning from the book.
"What I don't get is why you just started studying a week ago for this test," commented Riku as Zeek turned form his book and glared at him. "What?"
"It's not my fault that this test sneaked up on me," Zeek growled as suddenly loud knocks on the door caught Kairi's attention.
"Hey, Sora, someone's at your door," said Kairi as Sora turned towards her.
"I'm still trying to get this math, can you get it?" Sora asked as Kairi sighed and walked towards the door.
After Kairi reached the door, she quickly opened it to see Yuffie struggling to keep a hold of something by a leash.
"Hey Kairi," greeted Yuffie as she quickly pulled on the leash.
"What's going on Yuffie? And what's up with the leash?" Kairi asked as Yuffie revealed Red the Armadillo. "Is that an armadillo?"
"Yeah, his name's Red Green, and I needed someone to watch him…" replied Yuffie as she handed the leash to Kairi. "And I thought that Sora would be the perfect guy to watch this pet."
"But, isn't it illegal to have this kind of animal as a pet?" Kairi asked as Red the armadillo ran into Sora's house.
"Probably," said Yuffie before she ran away. "I won't return!"
"Yuffie wait!" Kairi yelled before she was pulled into the house with the door slamming shut.
Red pulled Kairi into the kitchen, everyone eyed her strangely except Zeek who was busy taking a practice test.
"What in the world?" asked Cloud before Kairi released her grip from the leash and Red ran around wildly.
"Where'd that armadillo come from Kairi?" Aries asked as Kairi was gasping for air.
"His name is Red and Yuffie just dropped him off," answered Kairi, as Sora looked strange.
"So are we supposed watch him or what?" Sora asked as Riku left the room. "Where you going Riku?"
"I've got a feeling this won't turn out good, so I'm going to watch TV," replied Riku as he left the room.
"You all mind keeping it quiet, I'm trying to practice," Zeek commented not looking up from his test.
"Sorry," apologized Aries when all of a sudden there was a loud smash in the kitchen.
"Now what?" Sora sighed as he went to investigate.
The sight that gave Sora a scare waited for him in the kitchen, in the door of his fridge was Red chewing on food that seemed to fall out of the fridge. Sora yelled before everyone except Zeek and Riku ran into the room and saw what was happening to Sora's fridge.
"This is classic," commented Cloud as Sora glared at him.
"Shut up! And help me get rid of this over grown rodent!" Sora yelled as he ran towards Red with anger in his eyes.
"I don't that's a good idea guys," said Aries as Cloud ran besides Sora.
Just as Sora and Cloud were about to lift Red the armadillo, Red was able to somehow jump high into the air away from Cloud and Sora who knocked their heads together.
"I didn't know armadillos could do that," Kairi said as Red landed like a ninja.
"They don't, but I've never seen an armadillo act like this either," replied Aries as Sora and Cloud stood up.
"I don't care if that armadillo knows how to play jazz music, he's going down!" Sora yelled as he ran towards Red.
Just as Sora was about to tackle Red, the armadillo quickly jumped into the air. It almost seemed like the matrix slow motion effect before Red kicked Sora in the chin, sending Sora through air. Kairi, Cloud and Aries were all freaked out at the fact that their friend was just knocked away by an armadillo. As Red landed on the ground he turned towards the three.
"This armadillo's crazy!" yelled Cloud before the three ran out of the room yelling crazily.
Red just calmly walked out of the kitchen as Zeek walked into the room; Zeek looked around and observed the mess that was before him. He even saw Sora knocked out on the floor, however Zeek just shrugged it off and walked over to the fridge.
"Sora really needs to clean this place up," Zeek thought before he grabbed the only can of soda that wasn't knocked out of the fridge. "Well, I better get back to grading that practice test."
Zeek immediately left the room to get back to his test, but when he entered the room where he left the test he yelled in frustration. All his papers, test sheets, test booklet were ripped apart! And he knew what the cause was, it was Red the armadillo throwing the papers into the air!
"What in the world!" yelled Zeek as Red glared at him. "Curse you, you dang armadillo!"
That was the last sentence that pushed Red over the edge, mainly because Red had jumped off of the table and on to Zeek. Zeek was yelling, especially when Red showed his two fangs.
"Oh crud!"
// ------ ---- --------- -------- ------- -------- // ------- -------- ------- ------- -- ///
A few minutes later, Zeek ran through the living room while Riku was watching TV. Riku just shrugged as he watched Zeek run out the door, then went back to watching TV. Suddenly, sitting next to him was Red; Riku looked shocked at Red.
"Cool, an armadillo," Riku commented as he noticed that the remote was near Red's feet.
Red then clicked on the remote and changed the channel to (insert favorite TV channel). Riku was somewhat impressed with how an armadillo could use a TV remote.
"Nice choice," complimented Riku as Red grinned at him.
/------ ------- ------- ------- ------- ------ // ------- ------- ------ ---- -- //
Meanwhile, outside Sora's house we find Sora, Zeek (both in bandages), Kairi, Could, and Aries discussing what to do the next.
"Yikes, you two look like you two lost a couple of fights," commented Aries as Sora and Zeek glared at them.
"It was that danged armadillo!" Zeek yelled as Cloud coughed.
"His name is Red Green," corrected Cloud as Zeek growled.
"Whatever!" Zeek yelled, as everyone looked embarrassed.
"Zeek calm down," said Kairi as Sora whistled to get everyone's attention.
"That's better, now how we going to get rid of Red?" Sora asked as Cloud looked like he had an idea.
"I've got it! I was saving this plan to get rid of Zeek," said Cloud as Zeek began to clench his fists.
"I'm standing right here you know!" Zeek yelled as Cloud snickered.
"I know, anyway listen up…" replied Cloud as everyone gathered together to listen.
Unknown to the group, Red was watching them from the window reading their lips. As soon as the group finished talking Red began to growl.
//// ------ --------- ------- ----- ---- /-------- ----------- ---- - -//
An hour later, the group had gotten Vincent (who also had a car and had his license) to join in their plan. Vincent was driving Sora, Riku, Kairi, Red and Aries while Zeek and Cloud (who were dressed like ninjas for some reason) were following them.
"So why are we heading to the mall that's near the other side of the island?" Riku asked as Red yawned loudly showing his fangs.
"These fangs look dangerous," pointed out Aries as Red growled. "Sorry."
"They've got a sale on key chains and video games too," answered Sora as Vincent picked up a piece of paper.
"Do I say my line now Kairi?" Vincent asked as Kairi nodded. "Kay, I need to refuel my car…Sora your penmanship is horrible. Uh, I mean, hey look a gas station! We need to stop."
As soon as Vincent stopped his car, everyone except Red jumped out of the car to get some snacks while Vincent was filling up his car with the fuel need. Then suddenly, Zeek and Cloud pulled up to Vincent's car, jumped out of the car, opened Vincent's car, quickly stuffed Red into a sack, threw the sack in the trunk and then drove off Dukes of Hazard style!
"Hey! You punks…shoot, what was the next line?" asked Vincent before he pulled out a piece of paper and quickly read it. "Ah, here we are…give back Red! Come back here!"
Everyone soon returned to the car to see Vincent's poor acting.
"Guys, were you all acting just to get rid of Red?" Riku asked, as everyone looked nervous. "Cause I already knew that you planning it. And your acting is bad."
"Was it that bad?" asked Sora as he scratched the back of his head.
"Can we still go to the mall?" Kairi asked.
"Everyone hop in! Let's celebrate!" yelled Vincent.
//------ ------ ------ ---- ------- ------ ------ - / --------- --------- ------ -/
Meanwhile, Zeek and Cloud were laughing as they were driving to the other side of the isle. As soon as they reached their destination, they jumped out of the car and walked to the trunk.
"It's going to be a fiesta when we get back," Zeek said as he got the keys to the trunk.
"Yeah, and its goodbye saber tooth armadillo," added Cloud as Zeek began to open the trunk.
As soon as the trunk of the car was opened, Zeek and Cloud were shocked to see that the sack was empty.
"Where'd Red go?" Zeek asked when suddenly Red appeared the two from behind.
Zeek and Cloud yelled before Red jumped into the air and used his tail to slam the two teens' heads together. Zeek wasn't hurt as badly so he was Red's first target. Zeek had dropped his keys and as he put his hand on top of the keys, Red stomped his front paw on top of it.
"Oh no!" screamed Zeek before Red rolled into a ball and rolled over Zeek's right arm.
"Dang that armadillo can fight," commented Cloud as he stood up and noticed that Red was in the air. "Oh crud!"
It was like with Sora with the matrix slow-motion kick that sent Cloud flying into the car. And thankfully, Zeek managed to get the car started, and quickly sped off with Red running afterwards. Zeek and Cloud were laughing while they were watching Red in the mirror.
"Look at him try to chase us!" Zeek laughed as Cloud laughed as well and suddenly a huge blaring horn alarmed them.
"A semi truck!" yelled Cloud, as the huge semi truck was only feet away.
Thankfully, Zeek managed to turn the wheel so the truck couldn't hit the car, however that was bad luck. The reason being you may ask, they were going off a cliff! Looks like those two guys of Destiny Isle are in big trouble.
// - -- ----- ----- -- -- --- --- ---- ---/----- ------- ----- ---- ------- ----- /
An hour later at Sora's house, Zeek and Cloud busted through the door both in bandages.
"Yeah! Red is gone!" Cloud yelled as Sora, Riku, Kairi, and Aries looked at them giving motions for silence.
"And you guys are paying for our medical bills," said Zeek as suddenly Red appeared behind the two again. "But, I'm glad that we got rid of that stinking armadillo."
"Uh, guys," Sora said shyly as he gestured behind Zeek and Cloud.
After Zeek and Cloud turned, their screams filled the entire house before Red slammed their heads together again this time knocked the two out.
"This is not good," sighed Kairi as suddenly someone busted through the door and everyone looked to see Sephiroth.
"Hey Sephiroth," Aries greeted as Sephiroth looked around.
"Did I miss the party?" asked Sephiroth as he noticed Red and gasped. "Red Green! Is it you?"
All of a sudden, Red began to run towards Sephiroth and then began to rub up against Sephiroth's right leg.
"You know this cursed armadillo?" Riku asked as Sephiroth began to pet Red's head. (Hey another rhyme)
"He's my pet, but a while back he was stolen away from me," answered Sephiroth as he began to leave. "Well, I'll be taking Red home."
After Sephiroth was gone for five minutes, Yuffie walked into the house. And as soon as everyone saw her, fire appeared in his or her eyes.
"Hey there guys," gulped Yuffie as everyone began to walk (except Zeek and Cloud who were still knocked out) towards her. "I take it that it was a bad idea to come back here. Well I'll just came to get my wallet and well goodbye!"
"Get her!" Sora yelled as he, Riku, Kairi, and Aries began to chase after Yuffie.
// ------ ------ ----- ----- ----- ---- ---- - /------- ------- -------- ------ //
Vyser: Well I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. And no this is not the Christmas chapter, but speaking of which, I am in need of a Christmas chapter idea. So give me ideas, if your idea is selected then I'll reply to your review, yet there's still a little extra, in order to get your idea chosen, you need to guess which show was named during this chapter. I don't own that show. Till the next time, be safe when you Christmas shop, never wear golf shoes to the mall, and review this story!