Chapter 15- Step By Step…
The day has gone by and it is finally three o' clock in the afternoon in the Hidden Village of Konoha! Practices for the play have been going smoothly so far, until…
LEE: AAAH! SOMEBODY! HELP! SOUND NINJAS HAVE COME TO KIDNAP ME!
SAKON (who is actually Naruto): Haha! We have come to get you, oh ugly fuzzy-browed one!
LEE: Huh? HEY! That isn't very nice!
SAKON: (whispers) Hey! This is called "acting", remember?
LEE: Huh? Oh yeah! I totally forgot!
TAYUYA (who is actually Kiba): We will destroy you, you pathetic leaf ninja! Arrgh! Darn… Hey, Naruto! Can we please switch places? I don't want to be Tayuya!
SAKON: Huh? Oh, come on! I wanna be Sakon!
TAYUYA: But I wanna be Sakon too!
SAKON: Kiba, you're obviously more feminine than I am!
TAYUYA: What was that you said! Why you…
KIDOUMARU (who is actually Neji): Hey, guys! You'd better stop fighting and get this over with! I don't look good with six arms and a fuzzy high ponytail!
SAKON: Yeah, you're right…
JIROUBOU (who is obviously actually Choji): Hey! Do I really look this FAT!
SAKON: Hey! Let's get it on!
JIROUBOU: Whoops, sorry. (clears throat) You weak ninja! You dare come before the mighty power and wrath of the Oto ninjas?
TAYUYA: HUH? Oh, well…
JIROUBOU: Feel the fury! We will crush you with our ultimate power!
KIDOUMARU: Uhh… We won't let you get away without losing to us first, you freak!
LEE: Aaah! Oh no! I am too weak to fight! Can someone save me? Please!
SAKON: No one will ever come to save a low-class ninja like you! Prepare to die!
(punches Lee) Mwahahahaha!
LEE: (sarcastically) Ouch! That hurt! Oh my goodness! I am so weak! I can do nothing!
TAYUYA: Now… Feel the fury of my music! (plays a normal flute)
LEE: Oh no! Your beautiful music is melting my brain! I can't stand it! AAAAH!
KIDOUMARU: My pet spiders will take you down, you miserable being! Hah!
(throws plastic spiders at Lee)
LEE: AAAH! They're crawling on me! They're sucking my blood! Noooo!
JIROUBOU: Now it's my turn to fight! I will finish you off with my ultimate jutsu! Haaaah!
(farts) POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
SAKON: Man, that is nasty! What did you have for lunch!
JIROUBOU: Sorry…
LEE: Oh no! Your Fart No Jutsu has taken away all my power with its horrid stench! My bones are melting! THEY'RE MELTING… Waaaah! Ugh. (pretends to faint)
GAI: (from behind a bush) Bravo! Bravo! I congratulate all of you for a job well done! Those lines were absolutely astonishing! Magnificent! Done like a real sound ninja!
TAYUYA: Yeah. Can I turn back into my handsome original self now? I'm not used to having long hair!
GAI: Sure you can! Lee, you could get up now! And show master Tsunade that the sound ninjas have broken your bones!
LEE: …
GAI: Well? Get up!
LEE: …
GAI: LEE! I SAID, GET UP!
LEE: How am I supposed to stand with broken bones in my body, Sir Gai!
GAI: Huh? But of course! Why didn't I think of that! Lee! You're such a bright student! Here, let me help you up!
ASUMA: Gai, are you sure this is gonna work?
GAI: Do you doubt my brilliance?
ASUMA: Huh? …
GAI: Of course it's gonna work! You can see just what a great actor my Rock Lee is! You'll see! He'll make Tsunade-sama believe he was attacked by four Oto ninjas! It'll be a piece of cake for my adorable student! Isn't that right?
LEE: Yes, sir!
GAI: Shikamaru will be crowned as prince of the play and he and his beautiful princess will live happily together in a magnificent palace with beautiful unicorns and brave knights and with twenty-six children!
SHIKAMARU: TWENTY-SIX! I only wish to have two kids!
GAI: Oh fine. Two, then.
And because phase one of Gai's plan successfully worked, they move on to phase two of the plan… To go to the Hokage's office and beg Tsunade to give the role to Shikamaru…
(knock, knock)
TSUNADE: Come in.
GAI: Good afternoon, Tsunade-sama!
TSUNADE: What the hell are you doing here? Can't you see I'm working?
GAI: Uhhrrm, yes, I can see that clearly… It's just that… Well, um, about the play…
TSUNADE: I already said that it can't be helped! Lee is the prince and that's that.
GAI: But…
TSUNADE: But what? Lee broke an arm or something like that?
GAI: (gasps) Whoah… You're good! And that's the reason you're Hokage and I'm not!
TSUNADE: (sighs) Okay. Where is he?
LEE: Tsunade-sama! It was terrible! I was walking then, suddenly, Oto ninjas attacked me!
TSUNADE: Why didn't you fight back?
LEE: Huh? I DID! But they were just too powerful! They broke my bones!
NARUTO: It's true! And now, he can't be the prince anymore!
LEE: We need someone else to take my place! Tell him who, Naruto!
NARUTO: It's…
SASUKE: Hey, Naruto. I'll see you in a minute, okay? (winks)
NARUTO: (blushes and drools) Sasukeeee…
LEE?!
TSUNADE: (sighs) Well then, who's going to be the new prince?
LEE: Obviously, the perfect man for the job would be no other than Nara Shikamaru!
SHIKAMARU: (chuckles nervously)
TSUNADE: Fine then, Shikamaru will be the prince. Lee, you may rest until you feel better.
LEE: Thanks so much, Hokage-sama!
TSUNADE: Okay, now everyone! Back to practice! Shikamaru, I'll be expecting a lot from you.
SHIKAMARU: Yes, Tsunade-sama. You can count on me! …I hope.