Well, folks, I am losing my internet access again, so who knows when I will be back. In the meantime, here is a superlong post, and I apologize that it is not very original and that I am so mean to Legolas.
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Legolas slept very badly that night. No matter what position he laid in, he couldn't get away from the burning pain that spanned between his back and thighs. When the sun finally showed his head over the great Mirkwood trees surrounding the palace, the child gave up and rose to face the day. The pain that had kept him awake and uncomfortable all night now made movement a punishment, and Legolas wished fervently that his brother was there to comfort him and bring him some hot tea as he always had before when Legolas was sick. The elfling pushed that thought away quickly, sure that Kadorin would not have babied him because he was in pain from his punishment.
The child was still leaning gently against his bed when the servants arrived with his breakfast, signifying he was confined to his rooms once again. With a sigh, Legolas took the breakfast from the young elf maiden as the others tidied his rooms, murmuring his thanks. The girl smiled, but did not reply, knowing that she would get in trouble if she spoke to the prince while he was being punished. Legolas glanced at the tray, then set it aside. His stomach was too unsettled to eat. The servants frowned at that, but left without a word, leaving Legolas alone again.
Dressing was a chore, as peeling off the clothes that he had fallen asleep in tore at the tender skin. The youngest prince considered climbing back into the cool, soothing sheets of his bed without dressing so as to lessen the pain, but decided against it. He didn't want to be called lazy on top of everything else should anyone be sent to check on him, so he dressed. Pulling on his leggings was misery, but the tunic wasn't so bad, and braiding his hair took his mind from the pain.
After he finished, Legolas went out to sit on the balcony, allowing himself to be comforted by nature as no one else around him seemed willing to do. His peace did not last long, however. He was feeling a little better and wondering what he would do that day, confined as he was, when the doors of his room opened for a visitor. When Legolas painfully went to see who it was, he was unpleasantly surprised to see it was Lord Neurion, there personally to fetch him for his lessons. The child had to stop himself from running away in fright when Neurion reached out to physically escort him.
Legolas' active imagination exhausted itself coming up with horrible possibilities of what his 'lessons' would be like, and questions of why his studies were resuming now and if his old tutor would be instructing him. Even the child's worst nightmares, however, could not live up to what would happen to the child over the next few weeks.
Neurion deposited the elfling child in a chair in the middle of the small library reserved for the prince's studies. The king's advisor settled himself across the table in front of a large stack of books. "I am taking over the burden of your instruction, Legolas, from now on." He said darkly, picking up the top book and searching through the pages.
Legolas was immediately terrified at those words, imagining having to spend hours every day with Neurion. "Oh, but Lord Neurion, Tiresan is very particular about my studies, and I would not want to inconvenience you. You must have many more important things to do." He said quickly.
Neurion was immediately livid, his eyes frightening as he focused in on Legolas. "Have you forgotten already that you adar has left your training and discipline to me? You are not going to rebel against his wishes, are you?" He asked, beginning to stand, as if to take Legolas to see his father that very instant.
Legolas was quick to appease the older elf. "No, no, Lord Neurion, I had not meant that! If you are willing to help me, I will of course do my best to be worthy of your instruction." He said, blue eyes wide and desperate. He almost sighed with relief when Neurion sat back down.
"Very well then, we will begin." Neurion said, returning his eyes to the book of Lothlorien history. "I have gathered all the books that your former tutor said you have recently covered or were covering before you were confined to your quarters." Legolas looked down, remembering the weeks spent completely isolated in his rooms as punishment, during which the servants had never been allowed to speak to the youngest prince. "I think a review would be appropriate, don't you?" He asked, and Legolas squirmed in his seat underneath the heavy gaze.
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Legolas collapsed on his bed in exhaustion, his thoughts muddled and confused after all the questions he had endured throughout the day. Neurion had kept him over 6 hours in the library, hounding him with questions of things he had barely begun studying, or had studied years ago. When ever he had answered wrong, the advisor's gaze had become more dangerous and his frown deeper until Legolas was practically stumbling over his words, frantically searching for the correct answer. He had finally been dismissed by the Lord with disgust. Neurion had told him he would be speaking to the king about his "disappointing display," and what was to be done about it.
Legolas was too frightened to sleep. Every time Neurion spoke to his father, the prince's life got steadily worse and worse. He assumed he probably deserved all the punishments he had received, and would deserve this one as well, but it was nearly impossible to concentrate with Neurion's glare of disapproval. He hoped his father would remember his son's discomfort with Neurion and take that into account when deciding punishment, but somehow he doubted it. Surely if Thranduil had observed his son's fear of Neurion, he would not have placed the prince in the advisor's care.
Sleep came at last, as even the child's terrified questions could not deny his body's need for the sleep he had lost the night before.
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The banging of the ornately carved double doors striking the walls parallel with them with great force startled Legolas out of his sleep. He sat up quickly, his eyes frightened underneath the mess of his sleep-tousled hair. Neurion ignored him, striding to the windows and throwing open the curtains, though it did not lighten the room much. Glancing outside, Legolas noticed it was perhaps a half hour till dawn.
Neurion whirled on him, and Legolas climbed out of bed quickly, his heart beating quickly as he forced himself to stand and wait for whatever punishment he would receive. The Lord looked him up and down, then crossed his arms over his chest before speaking. "From now on, you will be awake and prepared for lessons at this time, no matter what time I come to retrieve you. You will not keep me waiting for any reason, as I have many other things to see to." Neurion instructed, and Legolas nodded his ascent quickly, the thought of rebellion not even present in his tense state.
Neurion's glare did not lessen. "You will also clean your own rooms from now on, and will retrieve your own meals from the kitchens when I tell you to do so." Legolas wondered if that meant he would have to stay in his rooms unless specifically told to go somewhere else, but once again nodded. "You will study in your rooms whenever you have no other instructions, so as not to repeat the pathetic lessons we had yesterday." Legolas nodded a third time, wondering if he was to be punished after all.
Neurion just turned away from him after that third nod, and left the room. Legolas breathed a huge sigh of relief, but quickly began making his bed, not wishing to anger Neurion if the lord came suddenly back and saw him unoccupied. He wondered how he was to study if he did not have any books in his rooms, but did not worry about that yet. As soon as he had finished, he picked up his clothes from the previous day and put them near the door, unsure of whether he was allowed to leave his rooms to deliver them to be cleaned. With that done, Legolas bathed in cold water, having no servants to heat the water for him. Shivering, he dried, dressed, and braided his hair as quickly as possible and went and sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the open windows leading to his balcony, trying to soak up what warmth he could from the early morning sun.
Neurion did not come back for almost an hour after that, but Legolas was too afraid of punishment to do anything other than wait. He already worried what the advisor would say when he saw him doing nothing.
It turned out he needn't have worried, since he was in trouble anyway. However, the child could not have imagined the horrible thing Neurion had devised as punishment. The advisor strode in and glowered down at him, and Legolas was quick to get to his feet, though he couldn't meet the darker elf's eyes. Neurion waited until the child couldn't stand the silence anymore. "Are we to begin my studies now, my lord?" Legolas asked hesitantly.
Neurion chuckled, but there was nothing pleasant about the sound. "Legolas, have you already forgotten your atrocious display yesterday, your continued stubbornness against your studies, your behavior of late?" He asked casually, and Legolas felt his heart drop down to his toes. "I have spoken to your father, and he has decided that you will tell your mother and brother how you have been acting and apologize, and then you will be removed from your rooms and placed in with the servants until you once again gain the right to be prince of our fine land. Thranduil will explain himself what your punishment is to the people, and you will no longer be allowed to speak to anyone other than me, nor they to you. Nay, no one may even acknowledge you until you have proven yourself." The older elf said with entirely too much dark satisfaction.
Legolas thought he would die. Then, as the words and their meaning really began to sink in, he wished he could die. To be treated as if he didn't exist by everyone but Neurion, who Legolas would rather ignore him, was bad enough, but to have to write his brother and tell him how much trouble he was in? Even worse, to finally be allowed to see his mother, only to disappoint her by explaining what was to happen. It wasn't bearable.
Legolas couldn't help himself. He burst into tears, and looked pleadingly up to Neurion. "Please, my lord, I am sure I deserve this punishment, but at the very least, do not make me tell my mother what is to happen. She has been so very ill, I do not want to upset her, my lord. I will do whatever else you ask of me, but do not make me hurt nana." Legolas begged, trying not to look pathetic, but willing to do or say whatever he needed to stop this.
Neurion smirked at him. "I have told you once before, Legolas. Your begging only convinces me this is just the punishment you need. I would not have your mother kept unaware of how her son is acting. Perhaps she can make you repent." He paused and looked at the tear-stained elfling's face. "Besides that, your father has made this decision, not me. I cannot change his punishment." Neurion explained.
Legolas merely cried harder. "Then let me speak to adar, please. Lord Neurion, surely it cannot be fair to hurt my nana to punish me." He tried one last time, but Neurion turned red and struck the prince hard across the face with the back of his hand. Legolas jaw snapped shut on his tongue and he was knocked to the ground by the force of the blow. He stayed there, too afraid and upset to get up, instead crying into the floor, holding his burning cheek with one hand and tasting a bit of blood on his tongue.
Neurion was furious. "How dare you question your father's judgment? How dare you suggest that I allow you to interrupt the work he must do to let you plead like a child for leniency? It is this behavior that has gotten you where you are now, Legolas." Neurion explained, tossing something at the child's feet. Legolas still did not look up. "I will be back in two hours, and by then, I expect you to have pulled yourself together and cleaned up, as well as having written your letter to your brother. Do not disappoint me." He finished darkly, and left the room.
It was several minutes later before Legolas was able to make himself move. He saw through blurred, streaming eyes the paper and pen that Neurion had left him, though the child already had letter writing material. Legolas thought Neurion had probably left them just in case, so the prince would have no excuse not to write the letter. Sniffling, Legolas rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hand, trying to stop crying. Leaving the paper, he stumbled into the bathroom, where he cried for another 10 minutes before he could make himself splash some water on his face and blow his nose.
The child was far too young to understand what was happening to him, or why. At his tender age, he still looked up to adults with unquestioning trust, or should have, and so still assumed that whatever his parents or those in charge of him did was only confusing because he didn't understand. Now though, he genuinely was confused beyond being able to brush it off. He couldn't see what he should have done differently in these past few weeks to improve his lot, much less how he could have prevented his latest punishment. He had been confined to his rooms for…over 2 months now! Legolas' mind blanched at that number, trying to imagine how those days could have blended together so seamlessly. He hadn't had any lessons during that time, nor had he been given books to study, so he didn't see how he should have known the answers to the questions Neurion had asked him..
Perhaps he should have asked for his books to study. Legolas didn't know, and for now, he didn't have time to ponder it. He had wasted almost an hour of his allotted time, and writing the letter was not going to be easy.
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Neurion looked up from the letter and frowned. "You cannot think this is acceptable, Legolas. You are far too easy on yourself." Neurion complained, and Legolas' heart sank. Perhaps Legolas had been too obvious in trying to explain away his actions, but he had wanted Kadorin to understand how hard he was struggling to be good, whether he succeeded or not. It didn't look like Neurion was going to give him that option. Neurion crumpled the letter Legolas had spent so much time and tears over, throwing it down carelessly. "Begin again. I will oversee your letter and tell you where you are going wrong, since it seems you are incapable of doing it on your own." Neurion ordered.
So it was that Legolas found himself bent over a new piece of parchment, carefully forming the words that tore his heart out to write; how errant his behavior had been, how stubborn and unworthy of being their father's son he was, and the punishment he was to face. Every time Legolas tried to express sorrow over his actions, Neurion was there to curtail his efforts. At one point Legolas even began crying once more, his tears falling on the parchment and smearing the ink. He received a strike across the back of the head for that and an order to pull himself together.
Neurion was finally satisfied when Legolas was completely miserable. "Sign it." The advisor ordered, and Legolas did so with one last sniffle he couldn't help, but Neurion said nothing. Instead, he swept the letter out from under the prince, folding it and tucking it inside his tunic. Legolas wiped at his eyes, trying to rein in his emotions.
Neurion wordlessly hauled Legolas to his feet from out of the chair, thrusting a cloth into the child's hands to wipe his eyes and nose. Legolas did so without a word, beginning to hand back the cloth, then thinking better of it when he saw the elder elf's expression, instead clutching it in one damp palm. Neurion gazed at him for a moment before speaking. "We are now going to see your mother, and due to her fatigue, we will not have much time. Any crying, complaining, or pleading with your mother will be severely punished, so I recommend you get complete control now." Legolas did his best to look strong and capable of those instructions, but his sinking heart told him that there would be no way he could keep from showing his distress when he saw the disappointment glinting in his beloved mother's eyes. Neurion continued, heedless of the obvious conflict in the child's face. "You will tell her, as quickly as possible, all that you have just written the crown prince. You will not bring in any of the excuses and pleas you included in your first letter. Do you understand?" Neurion asked Legolas, and the child nodded quickly.
The Queen's rooms were dark, and the tone hushed as several elf maidens bustled about the room, striving for the queen's comfort. Legolas would have stopped to let his eyes adjust, but a firm hand between his shoulder blades kept him moving forward. The servants quickly move towards them, explaining in hushed tones that the Queen was not to be disturbed. Lord Neurion countered with instructions from Thranduil to let the prince see his mother. The servants didn't look happy, but they stepped aside to let them pass.
Calistia looked pale and drawn, but surprisingly, the light that elves carried about them still shone brightly, not dimmed at all by her illness. If anything, it shone brighter. The Queen of Mirkwood turned weary, pain darkened blue eyes to see what the disturbance was. Her eyes immediately shone when she saw her son, however. "Nin ion, nin little las!" She said softly, joy apparent in her voice, reaching one pale hand weakly towards him, as if to draw her youngest to herself with will power alone. Legolas stifled a sob and moved to go to his mother, but the heavy hand moved to his shoulder and held him back.
Legolas looked up pleadingly to Neurion, but there was no mercy to found from that elf. Neurion ignored the prince, still looking at the queen. "I am sorry to disturb you, my queen, but your son has something he needs to tell you." Calistia looked confused, but turned back to look at her son, waiting. Legolas looked one last time to Neurion, begging him not to make him do this, or at least to let him go to his mother. Neurion ignored him.
With a deep breath that shuddered suspiciously like a sob, Legolas began. "I'm sorry, nana." He said miserably, looking to his feet. "Ada…" Legolas tried not to cry. "Ada wanted me to tell you how bad I've been. He says he hopes you will be able to make me behave better. He's had to keep me to my rooms for a long time now, and it hasn't helped any. Even…" Legolas choked and rubbed at his backside self-consciously. "Even physical punishment hasn't done anything to make me be better, and so ada thinks I need to live with the servants and…not be spoken to not speak to anyone until I can prove I can be a prince worthy of Mirkwood." Legolas couldn't help himself, and let out a sob. Neurion squeezed at his shoulder painfully, but once he started, he couldn't stop himself. Saying it aloud was bad enough, but to wonder what his mother was thinking made it worse. Wasn't it enough that his father was disappointed with him? Why did everyone have to be? "I'm sorry, nana. I want to be good, really! I've tried, I just…" Neurion was bruising his skin now, using more and more pressure until he gave a small cry of pain, pushing him towards the door.
"Las!" Calistia cried once, before they were out the door. Dimly, Legolas realized he was in a great amount of trouble, but he couldn't stop crying, and struggled to return to his mother.
Neurion shook him, then struck him hard enough to shock him into quiet sobs. "Stay here, or you will regret it." Neurion promised, his eyes frightening as he pushed the child against the wall and returned inside. The child could hear the Queen's enraged voice inside, and cried harder. So his mother was mad at him then. Surely she wouldn't have sounded that angry if she was not. Legolas buried his face in his hands and let his emotions take control.
When Neurion came out of the Queen's chambers, he was angry to speak. Instead, he took hold of Legolas once again and dragged him along back to the prince's chambers. Legolas tried not to think about what would happen when they got there.
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Don't hurt me please!