Chapter Ten- The Calm before the Storm
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"So, what does this have to do with me?" Harry asked.
"What do you mean, Potter?" Brock questioned, lighting up another cigarette.
"Well, why do I have to meet your friend?"
"He wanted to meet some of my customers, you know, see how I've been treating you guys, if I've been doing a good job for all of you. So I just decided that you would be the person that Mauricio would want to meet most out of the rest of the group."
"Why? Why me, I mean, what about John or Ben-"
"-What's with all the questions? I chose you, there is nothing to it. Don't be so fucking paranoid." Brock spat.
Harry backed away from Brock a little. "Okay, okay, sorry, I was just asking."
The car across the clearing turned on its head light and quickly turned them off. Brock threw his cigarette to the ground. "Okay, that's our cue. Let's go."
Harry and Brock crossed the clearing and made there way over to the car, their footsteps echoing in the silent night. Brock opened the door to the back seat and poked his head in, whispering quietly.
He turned back to Harry and said, "Wait here a minute." then climbed into the car, closing the door behind him. Harry shrugged and went to lean against dead tree nearby. He looked around the dark clearing, taking in his new surroundings.
This part of the park was much darker than Harry had imagined and although it was a little intimidating, Harry could only see beauty amongst the half dead trees. The sky was a mix of deep purple and black. The vibrant moon glistened in the clear sky, illuminating the trees, giving them an eerie glow. The sky was a sea of stars, shining brightly in the depths of night, looking down at the world. Looking up towards the sky, Harry couldn't help feeling a little lost in the vast universe.
The sound of the car door opening turned Harry's attention away from the sky. Brock stepped out of the car with a smile on his face.
"Well?" Brock asked.
"Well what?" Harry replied.
"Well are you going to stand there all night or are you going to get in?"
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Harry bolted up awake, yet again. It had been three days since Harry had arrived at Sirius' house and he still hadn't had a peaceful night sleep. Harry reached for his glasses and put them on, wiping beads of sweat off his forehead. He turned his attention to the clock. It was three in the morning.
Harry groaned in frustration and climbed out of bed, turning on the small lamp on his nightstand. He walked over to the dresser and opened it, taking out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter then went to sit by the open window.
In the past few days, Harry had already gone through two packs of cigarettes. Although Harry had previously promised that he wouldn't smoke while he was staying with his godfather, he was having difficultly keeping true to his word. The lack of sleep caused great tension for Harry. Smoking was his only way to calm down and relax his tired body.
Harry suspected that Sirius knew that he was smoking again. When Harry would go outside in the backyard for short periods of time, he would come back into the house with the fresh sent of smoke lingering on his clothes, hands and breath. Sirius was also probably able to smell the smoke from Harry's bedroom, which was staring to smell like a cigar shop. Sirius, however, hadn't said anything about it yet to Harry.
At this point, Harry didn't really care if Sirius was bothered by what he was doing. Sirius had been getting on Harry's nerves for the past few days. Every time Harry would walk into a room Sirius would ask him if he was okay or ask how he was doing. And when Sirius wasn't asking him annoying questions about his well being, he would watch Harry out of the corner of his eye, like he was some sort of experiment.
Harry wasn't use to being watched so closely. It made him feel uncomfortable for some reason. The Dursleys never looked at him the way Sirius did, the Dursleys never showed any interest in their nephew. They hardly even noticed Harry half of the time. They couldn't care less about him. Even though Harry should have been happy that Sirius seemed to actually care about him, he couldn't help but feel like he was being suffocated, like he had no free space to himself. Harry hated feeling as though he needed someone watching him all the time. He had been fine all by himself up to this point, he hadn't needed anyone before. Sirius' constant watching made Harry feel like a child, as if couldn't take care of himself. But Harry wasn't a child; he hadn't felt like a child in a long time.
Harry lit up another cigarette and rested his head on the cool window frame, closing his eyes. Harry rubbed his tired face and listened to the trees blowing in the wind. He sighed, letting the smoke escape from his nose and drift out the window. Once he had finished his cigarette, he put it out, then wrapped the cigarette butt in a tissue and threw it into the trashcan next to his dresser, hiding the evidence. Harry then pulled out another cigarette and placed it in his mouth, lighting it as he sat down on the window frame.
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Sirius listened to the sound of the lighter flicker on. A moment after, he heard Harry exhale softly as the smell of smoke leaking into the hallway. Sirius sighed quietly as he pulled his ear away from Harry's door, looking disappointed.
Sirius gently walked away from the door, not wanting Harry to realize that he was also awake at this unruly hour of the night. The past few nights had been just like this one.
Sirius would be asleep in his room and, being a light sleeper thanks to Azkaban, would be woken to the sound of Harry opening his dresser drawer and closing it loudly. Sirius would then tip-toe to Harry's room and lean against the door, listening to his godson smoking by the window.
Every time Sirius heard Harry light up a cigarette he felt a pain jolt into the pit of his stomach, feeling like he was failing in his duties of being a responsible godfather. James and Lily would have been so disappointed. All Sirius wanted to do was to run into Harry's room and grab the cigarette out of Harry's mouth. Only he couldn't. Harry had been so distant for the past few days, Sirius was afraid to do anything that could possibly hurt their already fragile relationship.
Sirius walked towards his room, his bare feet padding on the wood floor, gently closing the door behind him as he slipped inside. Sirius sighed and then loudly opened his door, walked into the hallway and noisily went downstairs to get a drink of water. Sirius hoped that his loud presence would scare Harry into going back to bed.
By the time Sirius returned upstairs, Harry's room was silent and the smell of smoke had greatly faded from the hallway. Sirius thought about going to check on Harry, but thought against it and went back to bed, hoping that things would be better in the morning.
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The morning and the afternoon passed rather quickly. Harry tried avoiding Sirius by going in the backyard and resting under the trees and by staying out of the rooms his godfather was occupying. During breakfast and lunch, Harry stayed silent, brushing off Sirius's conversations with nods or shrugs. When Sirius started to ask him questions Harry would get defensive and exit the room, leaving both Sirius and Harry feeling frustrated.
Harry was in his room, resting on his bed. Harry's back was propped up against a pillow as he read Quidditch Through the Ages. A knock on the bedroom door made Harry look up from his book.
"Come in." Harry said monotonously.
Sirius came into the room, a half smile on his face. "Hey, what are you doing?"
"Reading." Harry replied boringly, turning his attention back to his book.
"Feel like doing something?" Sirius asked hopefully.
"No." Harry replied.
Sirius raised and eyebrow. "No? Well, I want to go into town-"
"-Have fun."
"-and I wanted you to come with me."
Harry looked back up at Sirius with an expression that read 'You've got to be kidding me; there is no way in hell that you are getting me to leave this room.'
"I'll pass." Harry growled.
Sirius continued, "There are a lot of great shops in town that you still haven't seen yet."
"I don't feel like it." Harry said, turning a page in his book.
"It will be fun." Sirius insisted. "Come on, let's get out the house for a little and get some fresh air. You'll have a good time. I promise."
Harry sighed. "For how long?"
"I don't know. An hour or so. Trust me; it will be good to get out of the house for a bit. You get dressed and then we'll go into town and walk around. Okay? It will be fun, Harry."
Harry sighed and closed his book, knowing that Sirius wasn't going to let Harry get out of going into town. "Fine."
"Great." Sirius said, smiling. He walked out of the room and closed the door behind him so Harry could get changed out of the pajamas he had been wearing all day.
Harry got up from the bed and went to the dresser then pulled out the pair of jeans that Sirius had gotten him last time he came to visit and a green tee shirt. He got dressed quickly then searched through the drawers for his black jumper. Once he found it, Harry pulled the jumper out of the dresser and pulled it on over his head. As he did, the contents of the jumper pocket fell to the floor.
The bag of pot. Harry had forgotten all about it. He looked at the untouched bag on the floor, wondering what he should do with it. He bent down and picked it up, looking at it uncertainly. Harry didn't know what to do with it. He definitely wasn't going to smoke it anytime soon. Drugs weren't his thing.
'I could give this to John or Max or someone.' Harry thought but then remembered, 'Wait, I'm not going back there anymore.'
A knock at the door made Harry jump and he shoved the bag into jumper his pocket.
"Yeah?" Harry croaked.
Sirius opened the door. He was dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a navy blue button up shirt with the top few buttons undone, revealing a white tee-shirt underneath. "Ready?" He asked.
"Yeah." Harry said.
"Good. Let's go." Sirius said and exited the room then went downstairs. Harry reached into his pocket a pulled the pot out. He needed to hide this.
"Come on, Harry." Sirius called impatiently from the foot of the stairs.
Harry shoved the pot back in the jumper pocket. He'd hide it when he got back home. "Coming." Harry shouted down to Sirius, and then left his room, closing the door behind him.
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Sirius' house was only a five minute drive from the little town. As Harry and Sirius drove into town, Harry couldn't help but feel like the town looked like it came out of a picture book. The sidewalk was neatly paved and kept clean. The parking lot was lined with trees and plants. Near the parking lot was a small, shaded park with a swing set and slide for smaller children to play at. The shops were close together and dressed in pastel shades of blue, cream and peach. They had little awnings and benches outside some of the shops. People were walking up and down the street, shopping and enjoying themselves.
Sirius parked his motorcycle in the parking lot then he and Harry made their way towards the shops. Sirius and Harry walked along the streets, silently window-shopping for a while before Sirius broke spoke.
"I have to go into the tea shop here. I told Remus that I would pick up some weird type of herbal tea for him. If you want, you can go look in another store while I do this. Buying tea isn't exactly exciting."
"Whatever." Harry mumbled.
Sirius sighed. "Why don't you check out the art shop. They have some cool paintings done by local artist. You'll like it."
"Fine." Harry said as he started to walk away from Sirius.
"Wait in there for me. Okay, Harry?" Sirius said and Harry just nodded, then turned in the opposite direction of his godfather and rolled his eyes. Harry needed a smoke.
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Harry walked down the street, back towards the parking lot. Harry located a little pub, and wandered to the back of it, knowing he could smoke privately there. He leaned against the cool brick walls as he lit up a cigarette.
The back door to the pub sung open and out came a tall, thin woman with curly blonde hair and bright red lipstick. Her fingernails were long done in a French manicure style. She was dressed in black paints and a white shirt with a matching apron with many pockets. She searched her pockets frantically. She reached into her shirt pocket that had a nametag on it that said 'Charlotte'.
After a moment she sighed in exasperation. She turned to Harry, who she had just noticed, and nudged her head towards him. "You wouldn't happen to have another one would you, Cutie?"
Harry reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette and gave it to the woman. She took the cigarette and asked, "And a light?"
Harry nodded at her and handed her the lighter. She smiled gratefully at him and took the lighter. She placed the cigarette in her mouth and lit it before handing the lighter back to Harry.
She took a drag of the cigarette and sighed before turning back to Harry. "I probably should be telling you off for smoking at your age, but then again, I guess that would make me a hypocrite since I'm the one who asked you for a smoke."
"I guess so." Harry replied, slightly amused.
"How old are you anyhow? Ten?" She asked, examining Harry warily.
Harry looked offended. "I'm almost thirteen."
"Oh, almost thirteen, I should have known, after all, all almost thirteen year olds stand behind pubs and smoke, right?" Charlotte said, giving him a disapproving look before smiling.
Harry just shrugged and took another drag of his cigarette. "This one does."
Charlotte asked, "So, Cutie, you don't have anything better to do than stand around smoking? I was under the impression that ten-"
"-Thirteen."
"-thirteen year olds go to the park and play video games for fun, not stand around smoking behind pubs in the middle of the after noon, all alone. Are you here all alone?"
"I'm not here alone. I'm with my godfather." Harry clarified.
"And he just lets you go off on your own. How responsible." Charlotte said, sarcastically.
"He doesn't let me." Harry said, "I just…"
"You just do what you want when ever you feel like it and ignore what he says?" Charlotte asked.
"Sort of, well, no, not really. It's complicated." Harry mumbled.
"Try me. I'm sure it's not that complex." She said.
"He's just been bugging me a lot lately." Harry said. "So I just thought…"
"You just thought you'd go off and have a few cigarettes and let him get all worried about you to teach him a lesson? Trying to act rebellious, Cutie?" Charlotte smirked. "It hardly ever works."
"No." Harry said, looking offended again. "It's just, I don't know."
"Are you mad at him?"
"Not exactly mad. He's just, he bugs me. I feel like I have no space. Like he cares too much and it's annoying. I'm not a baby; I don't need him around me all the time."
"Well, have you ever thought about it from his perspective?" Charlotte asked.
"What do you mean?" Harry questioned, raising an eyebrow.
"Well, I'm a Mum, I've got two kids, one is nineteen and the other is seventeen, and I know that when they were your age, I used to worry about them all the time."
"Why?"
"Well, it's a big world out there. There are a lot of things that adults try to protect there kids from. I suppose it could seem annoying at times but your godfather is probably so protective of you because he loves you very much."
Harry didn't say anything but he turned his gaze to the floor, letting Charlotte continue.
"And I can tell, just by the way you reacted to what I just said; that you care about him too and you probably already know how much he cares about you. He's probably worried about you, about your safety and your well being. All parents want to keep there kids safe, Cutie, that's just life. For instance, does he know that you smoke?"
Harry nodded. "Yeah, he does."
"I'm sure he's worried about that too. I'm sure he isn't happy that you smoke. I assume he has been keeping a close eye on you lately, am I right?"
"Yeah." Harry replied.
"Have you guys been fighting a lot?"
"Not fighting. We haven't talked much. I've just been kind of ignoring him." Harry said, quietly.
"Well Cutie, there's your answer. I bet that he feels like a horrible godfather because you aren't talking to him. Maybe he feels like there is something bothering you and that you are afraid to talk to him. It's a scary feeling to know something going on with your kids that you can't help with. He's looking out for you by the sound of it. And he probably feels like he's failing as a godfather."
Harry sighed. "He isn't a horrible godfather or anything. I just, let's say, hypothetically of course-"
"-Of course." Charlotte grinned.
"-what if there is something bothering me, and I just don't want to talk about it. How do I explain that to him and get him off my back, err, hypothetically."
"Well, is this hypothetical thing dangerous to you in anyway?" Charlotte asked.
Harry thought a moment. "I don't know."
"Well, this hypothetical thing, maybe you should talk to your godfather about it, because it sounds like it's a pretty complicated hypothetical situation."
"But I can't talk to him about this hypothetically thing."
"Why not?"
"I don't know. I don't want him to know, I guess. He's been really great to me and I don't want to make him worry."
"Well, this situation seems to have created some tension between you and him, Cutie."
"Hypothetically, of course."
"Naturally. Well, if I were you, I'd talk to him about it. Maybe if you aren't ready to talk about it with your godfather just yet, then maybe you could tell him that there is something bothering you and you just aren't ready to talk to him about it yet, but when you are, you'll let him know."
"I could, I guess."
"It would probably put his mind at ease a bit. Make him worry a little less, help him know that you don't hate him and that he hasn't done anything wrong."
"I guess."
"Where is he right now?"
"In one of the stores up the street."
"And where are you supposed to be right now?"
"In one of the other stores waiting for him." Harry said guiltily. "He'd probably be worried if I wasn't there when he came to get me."
"I would imagine so." Charlotte said, giving Harry a small smile.
"I should get back." Harry said. He turned to leave but before he did he turned to Charlotte. "Hey, um, thanks for the advice."
"No problem, Cutie. I hope everything works out for you. You're a nice kid and your godfather sounds like he's just looking out for you. Don't be afraid to talk to him. I'm sure it would help you both to get some things off your chest. Carrying around worries isn't good for your health."
"Neither is smoking." Harry pointed out.
Charlotte laughed, "No, no it isn't. You'd better get going, Cutie. You've got a godfather to meet and I've got some tables to get back to. See you around."
Charlotte gave Harry a final wave before going back inside. Talking to Charlotte had actually helped Harry. It gave Harry some comfort that maybe talking to Sirius could make things a little better. He had to get back to the store. Harry threw his cigarette to the ground before heading off back to the shop.
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When Harry got back to the art shop, Sirius was standing outside, with a plastic bag from the teas shop on one hand, and a worried look on his face.
Harry approached him, ready to tell Sirius that he really needed to talk to him about a few important matters. "Sirius, I need to talk-"
"-Where the hell were you?" Sirius asked, cutting Harry off, anger taking place of the fear.
"I was just-"
Sirius grabbed onto Harry's shoulders and pierced his godson with his grey eyes. "Do you have any idea how worried I was just now? I told you not to wander off!" Sirius said firmly.
"But, Sirius, I need to-"
"No, you need to listen to me Harry James Potter, when I tell you to do something I expect you to listen! What the hell were you thinking?" Sirius said, furiously.
Harry's face grew red. Why was Sirius being such a jerk about this? Harry was only gone for a few minutes. "Relax, okay. The-Boy-Who-Freaking-Lived is still in one piece."
"What if something happened to you?" Sirius lowered his voice so he couldn't be overheard. "What if a Death Eater showed up and saw you wandering around and hurt you? You can't just wander around, it isn't safe for you! I need to know where you are at all times! I'm not going to take you anywhere if I have to worry about you walking off like a child! You understand me?"
Harry shook out of Sirius' grip. Harry pierced Sirius with a look of pure hatred that made Sirius' heart painfully clench. Sirius ran a hand through his hair, aggravated with himself as he realized that he over reacted, disconnecting himself further from his godson.
Sirius took a deep breath and put a hand on Harry's shoulder. "Come on, we're going home."
Harry pushed Sirius' hand off his shoulder and glared at him. "I don't need you to lead me to the car park. I can get there just fine. Thanks." Harry replied sarcastically and began walking towards the parking lot, leaving Sirius behind him, glad that he hadn't told Sirius anything; he would have just overreacted to the situation.
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AN: That was a long chapter now wasn't it. Eleven pages in word! I had such bad writers block with this chapter. But I finally worked through it. I hope everyone liked this chapter, I hope it didn't come across as too boring.
I decided not to have Sirius and Harry actually fight; I just wanted to create some tension between them which works out better for later.
Hmm…well, the story is coming to an end, only three or four chapters left I think. You'll learn more about the Brock thing next chapter, along with a rather amusing tale in next chapter's AN on why I chose Mauricio as the name for Brock's dealer.
Please review! Gets down on knees and begs while making sad puppy dog face