Chapter Three

Addison stared at the OR Board. Actually, she glared at it. No where was Derek's name. She had gone home, but the trailer was so small, she thought she would go insane by herself. So she rang the hospital, but the damn nurse told her Derek was not accepting any calls. So she came in, to see when her husband would get out of surgery. Only, apparently, he was not in surgery.

He lied! She thought. Why would he lie to me?.

"You know, if you try just a little harder, I'm sure the board will go up in flames" Came a voice to her left.

Addison sighed.

"Mark, didn't i tell you to go away?"

"I did! You just happened to come the the place I went away to!It's not my fault!"

"Well, its a good thing I'm leaving then, isn't it?"

"Addison- wait. Listen, about what I said before- about Grey's mother. You haven't told anyone have you?"

Addison smiled. "Would I do that, Mark?"

Mark leveled a eye at her. "Yes, you would. My friend is working on her case here, so I need you to stay quiet, ok?"

Addison looked at him. "They're bringing her case to Seattle Grace? When?"

"Next week. I'll tell Meredith today. I don't think she knows."

Addison glanced around. "Mark, why don't we go talk about this somewhere else?"

Mark looked surprised. "Er... okay."

Addison smiled. "And you can tell me all about Ellis Grey, and what her chances of surviving this surgery are."

Meredith was sorting through some files when she hear the noise. She looked up, trying to identify the source of the strange sound.

"Psst! Mer!"

"What the?" She wondered aloud, glancing back and forth.

"In here! The closet!"

Meredith spun round, looking at the closet behind her. There was a small grill covering, and the voice seemed to be coming from there.

She frowned, and walked over, checking to see if anyone else was around.

The corridor was deserted. She pulled open the door, and someone grabbed her, pulling her in before she could scream.

"Don't yell! Its me- Derek."

Meredith glared at him. "What are you doing in a closet?" She hissed.

He grinned. 'Um... nothing. How's those labs going? Any news?'

Meredith shook her head. "The labs aren't back. And 'nothing' isn't an answer. What are you doing?"

Derek looked sheepish. "Er... I'm hiding from Addison. One of the nurses said she came back, looking for me. i think she knows I'm not in surgery."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Well, all she had to do was check the board. Your name isn't up there. And don't you think this is a little childish?"

Derek blushed. "Yes- childish, but necessary. "

Meredith looked at him.

"She's gone mad!" He whispered. "Always kissing me, and trying to do things with me, like go to dinner, and cuddle, and then she moves things in the trailer, and adds flowers, and cooks, and breathes, and makes the bed."

Meredith raised her eyebrows. "Yes. I think you mean she's happy. Not mad."

She was starting to feel uncomfortable. No matter how much she reassured herself she and Derek were just friends, she knew she was still in love with him. Discussing his wife was painful.

Derek looked at her. "But she can't be happy! I hate this! I don't want to kiss her! We haven't has sex in weeks, and I've never been so happy not to!"

Meredith began to back away. "Derek, maybe you should be discussing this with Addison, not me. Please. Anyone but me."

Derek grabbed her arm. "But i need to talk to you! You're the only one who gets me."

Meredith stared at him. "You don't get it, do you? This hurts! Talking to you about her hurts! Why are you doing this to me?"

Derek was quiet. "What if i told you I'm going to sign those papers?"

Meredith felt shocked. Then confused, and elated, and lost.

"The... the divorce papers?"

Derek nodded. "Thats why I dragged you in here. It's why I'm telling you all of this. I think i was trying to make you understand."

"Understand what?"

"Why I'm leaving her. I mean, this, all the coupley things she's doing with me- it should make me happy, right? I chose her. I picked her. But i don't love her. Not anymore. I thought i did, or would again, but I'm miserable."

Meredith's mouth dropped open. She was confused. He was.. leaving her? Almost a year later, and he was making the choice she'd wanted.

"Mer, I'm not expecting you to leap into my arms, but this is my speech to you. Just like the one you gave me in that OR. I'm asking you to try loving me again. To pick me, chose me, love me. I doubt you will, and I don't deserve it anyway, but I just need to tell you- I love you. And I'm sorry. And even if you say no, I'm going to keep chasing you. I'll let you beat me up with those ineffectual fists of yours if it will help. Anything. I'll wait a day, a week, a month, a year- forever. But I'll wait for you."

Meredith stared at him. He seemed about to cry, and he kept looking down, afraid to look at her. She thought for a moment.

"You didn't mention cheesecake. Or a radio, or pretending to like my taste in music.' She said eventually. "So, really, my speech was a lot better than yours."

Derek looked up, hope in his eyes. "Yes, you're right. Do you want me to try again?"

Meredith hesitated. She was either about to put her heart on the line, or walk away from this whole problem forever.

"Yes. i do. I'll give you a week. Sign the papers, talk with Addison, and try again. Then- then we'll see."

Derek's whole face lit up. He reached for her, but Meredith jumped back. She was not sure she was doing the right thing.

"One week, Derek." She walked out of the closet, her head spinning.