Well, I would have had this up sooner, but there was a Jimmy-thon on Nick today, and I was all caught up making my hard copy on my new old typewriter! I've wanted one of these for my whole life, almsost. God, I'm so excited. Anyways, I'm not sure what I think of this chapter. Sheen is a hard one to capture, and if I messed him up, let me know. Onwards!

I'd Rather be Anywhere but Here
By me, Cassi Mo.

Chapter 7: You can eat, if you're hungry enough.

Jimmy stared at the two lovers in shock, completely unable to absorb what he was seeing. Suddenly there was movement in Cindy's bed, causing Jimmy to turn away in agony. Fortunately, it was just them waking up. Jimmy sighed, relieved,when he was Sheen's head poke up from the mass of blankets.

"Is it breakfast time already?" he asked sleepily.

"No," Jimmy replied sweetly, "but it is trouble-time for you two. Lucky you, you get to answer to the dominatrix of this establishment."

Just then Cindy walked in, her jaw going lax upon taking in the scene. Suddenly her shocked look turned to one of ire. "I spend one night away from my cabin and this is what I have to return to?" she shouted.

Libby, who had also woken up when Cindy started to shout, sat up, revealing her still wearing a bra. Suddenly, she started to laugh. "You think me and Sheen… last night? …without telling you? You guys must be up to something if that's what you really think we were doing."

"Well, what else were we supposed to think?" Jimmy demanded. "We come in, see you two entangled in the blankets of Cindy's bed, with your clothes on the fricking floor!"

"Chillax, Jimmy," Sheen reassured him, "no need to get your panties in a bunch. So you saw our clothes on the floor. Did you see any underwear? We just took off our pants and shirts since it was so hot and we didn't have spares to get all sweaty." (heh, heh. I love false alarm 'hangers.)

"Yeah, we wouldn't do that in your bed," Libby contributed, "although it was pretty tempting."

"Okay, I'll believe you, as long as you promise never to speak like that in my presence again," Cindy said. She then looked questioningly at Libby and Sheen. "Why are you here, anyways?"

"Well," Libby said, "It's a long story."

"So tell me why we're here again?" Sheen asked Libby as she parked her car outside of Camp Anee Wherebutt Heer, thinking it was Eyedrath Erbee.

Libby sighed exasperatedly. This was the tenth time that Sheen had asked this in the past half hour, and tie took at least three minutes to explain her reasoning.

"We are here," she started with menacing calmness, "to find out what Jimmy's take on Carl is. I think he's gay. You don't. We need another opinion. And Jimmy would be able to tell us the most accurately."

"Oh," Sheen replied. "So why are we here again?"

Libby just ignored him and continued on through the all-girls camp. Not noticing any boys around, she stopped one camper that looked about eleven, and asked her where she could find Jimmy.

"Probably somewhere in the woods, making out with Cindy," The girl said jealously. Other girls around them sighed dreamily at the sound of Jimmy's name.

Libby raised her eyebrows at Sheen, who just shrugged in return. "Who is this Cindy?" She asked sweetly, handing the girl a piece ofbubble gum.

The girl took the gum greedily and replied, "Cindy Vortex. She's our swimming teacher. Why do you care so much?" She asked suspiciously.

"Well," Libby said, an idea forming in her head, "You see, Jimmy and I are under-the-bed lovers. That means I hide him under the bed when my boyfriend comes over." At the strange looks she was getting from both Sheen and the campers, she smiled.

"Just kidding, honey. Him and I are friends, and my boyfriend and I are here to ask him a question that can't exactly be asked over the phone. I'm not in the mood to look through the woods, so could you just tell me where Cindy's cabin is? I'm sure they spend a lot of time there."

The camper took another offered piece of gum and grinned. "Oh, they do. I'll lead you there, 'cause it's kind of hard to find on your own if you don't know the layout."

"Hook, line and sinker," Libby whispered to Sheen as they followed the young girl. "This was almost too easy. And Cindy too? None of us have seen her for years! Who would have thought Jimmy Neutron and Cindy Vortex,"—her tone grew dramatic—"star-crossed lovers almost as locally famed as Romeo and Juliet, sworn enemies, separated for years, would have been working at the same camp for the summer?"

"Not me," Sheen muttered. He really didn't want to be here; Ultra Lord was on in ten minutes. "If I miss an amazing episode of Ultra Lord that by some amazing miracle was on tonight and I didn't know about, you are going to have to make it up to me."

Libby smiled and kissed his cheek. She knew all too well about Sheen's love for Ultra Lord, even at the age of eighteen. He was too far into it to grow out now. "Okay, fine. You win. What do you want in return for missing an episode that you don't already have taped?"

Sheen grinned mischievously. "Well, I was thinking that I could show up at your house later, you know, after your parents are asleep, and we could—"

"No way. Not till we're legal, remember? And just because you're legal doesn't mean I am."

"Oh, then we must have broken that a long time ago, because you almost always watch the Ultra Lord reruns late at night with me."

"Oh… well… you said…" Libby stumbled over her words uselessly.

"I didn't say anything," Sheen retorted, "'Cause you interrupted me before I could get to my point! You really have a sick mind, you know that? And I'm the one that gets blamed for these things every day."

"Okay, here we are!" The camper's bright voice brought Libby and Sheen out of their disagreement to view a cabin not unlike all the other ones surrounding it.

"How do you know this is hers?" Libby asked the girl suspiciously.

"Oh, we spy on it all the time," the girl responded with a rather large smile.

"That's not a good idea," Libby warned. "You might see something you regret. Especially when it's Jimmy and Cindy," she murmured to Sheen.

"Yeah," Sheen piped in, "don't all you girls think Jimmy is hot or 'bangin'' or whatever you call good-looking guys? If you saw him with another girl than any of you, you'd be heartbroken. Better to leave things to the imagination."

"I guess you're right," the girl conceded. "I'm too young for love anyways."

Libby gazed at Sheen. "You'd be surprised at how young you can find love. We've been together since I was ten, and he's eighteen now."

"Yeah, but don't get any ideas," Sheen said. "It will land you in nothing but trouble."

"Okay, I should be on my way," the girl said suddenly, causing Sheen and Libby to look at each other skeptically. "This has been a great bathroom break. Lunch starts in ten minutes, so if you want to follow me back, I'll snag you some grub, if you're hungry enough."

"Uh, no thanks," Libby replied quickly before Sheen could say anything. "We ate on the way."

"What did you do that for?" Sheen accused when the girl was out of earshot. "I don't remember eating on the way."

"Well, I went to camp here once, and that food's barely edible. The camps have a bad reputation in the area for it. In fact, when I was here, I lost fifteen pounds, and while I wouldn't mind that today, it was a lot for a nine-year-old. "

"How come I never knew that?"

"You never asked," Libby said simply. "I think this cabin's empty, since we've been talking and no one has come to greet us. Let's check it out."

Cautiously the two entered the cabin. There was no sign of life anywhere. Sheen frowned when he saw this. "God, we came all this way for nothing? What a drag."

"Stop complaining," Libby snapped. "I don't see anything of Jimmy's here… maybe she moved in with him. Look for missing stuff: clothes, toiletries—"

"You mean like tampons and stuff?" Sheen exclaimed. "I love playing with those things! They're great for nosebleeds, you know. Not that I ever used one, but it was in Ultra Lord Episode 704: Attack of the Touchy Transvestites."

"I did not need to know that."

They looked around in silence for about ten minutes, when they suddenly heard footsteps.

"Oh, God, it's Cindy!" Libby whispered. "We can't let her find us rifling through her stuff, or she'll kill us! Quick, find somewhere to hide!"

As Sheen ran under the bed, Libby sought refuge in the shower stall, which gratefully had a wooden full-length door that shielded her completely. She heard Cindy muttering to herself about later and how it was going to be awesome and unforgettable. Libby shuddered, a mental picture forming in her head, and almost slipped and fell in the stall.

"God, where did I put my comb?" Cindy asked as she walked around the bathroom. She walked toward the shower for a second , and Libby was sure she was dead, but then she walked away when Jimmy was heardyelling for her to come out and stop taking so long. "Coming!" She called back, and walked briskly out the front door.

Once their footsteps could no longer be heard inside the cabin, Sheen and Libby deemed it safe to venture out of their hiding spots. Sheen sighed dramatically after struggling to get out from under the bed. "That was a close one!"

"You're telling me!" Libby cried. "Cindy was looking for her comb and almost blew our cover. If she opened the door and saw me hiding, I would have died!"

"Well, we shouldn't just stand here now. I want to see what they're up to!"

"I agree. Let's follow them, or at least search for them in the woods."

They searched the woods for some time before getting lost and just searching for a way out. When they did emerge from the foliage, it was well after dark.

"Well, now what?" Sheen asked pointedly. "Do you know where we are? And do you know where there is food?"

"As a matter of fact, I do. Come with me."

"So that's where we are, in your cabin, having snuck into the mess hall last night and eating something that hasn't made us sick yet before retreating back here to stake the place out. But you left, and we entered, planning to stay up for you, but you didn't come back, so we just slept here," Libby finally finished.

"Wow." Jimmy ran a hand through his tousled hair. "You weren't kidding when you said your story was long."

"Yeah," Cindy added, "we're going to be late for our classes if we don't leave now."

"Wait!" Sheen cried. "I missed two episodes of Ultra Lord last night and I am not leaving until I get my answer."

"Who said you were leaving just yet?" Jimmy asked his friend with an evil grin.

"I hope I wasn't the only one who thought that was creepy. You know what? I don't need my answers. I'll just leave now and pretend I never asked anything in the first place." He started to get up and walk towards the door, but a comment from Libby stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Have fun watching Ultra Lord by yourself."

"Okay." Sheen turned back around, his smile bright. "Creepy smiles are okay with me, as long as it means you keep coming over to watch TV."

"Well," Jimmy said, "I guess you'll just have to make yourselves comfortable here, because I don't have the answer just yet. I'll have Goddard bring over some stuff for you, and you can camp out here, for today. We'll be back as soon as we can, and we'll all talk this over before bed. Everyone set?"

Everyone nodded their heads, and Jimmy decided it was past time for him and Cindy to leave. As they walked together, Jimmy brought up a question that had been nagging at him.

"Uh, Cindy?" he asked. Cindy looked at him. "Since Libby and Sheen are staying at least one more night, you don't mind lending them your cabin, do you?"

Cindy smiled, instantly melting all of his previous nervousness away. "Of course I don't. They're my best friends. But where will I stay? I don't want to be in the same sleeping room as those two."

Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck, clearly uncomfortable. "Well I was kind of hoping you'd agree to staying with me. I mean, if you don't want to I completely understand. We can just arrange things so Sheen stays with me and Libby stays with you."

"God, those are my choices?" Cindy teased. "Stay with Libby, or stay with Nerdtron… that's a hard choice. I think everyone, including me, will be happier if Sheen and Libby use my place, and I stay with you."

"It's settled then. At lunch you can move whatever you'll need to my pad, and we'll tell Sheen and Libby the game plan." Now, let's get this day over with.

Okay, I feel as though there is some inclarity (is that a word? It sounds sophisticated) here. When I had the girl say Jimmy and Cindy were probably making out in the woods somewhere, it wasn't true. They haven't kissed yet or anything, 'cause I would have made it a little more advertised. Um, I think that's it. Oh yeah, if there are any grammatical errors I missed, I want to know about those two.

Review how you want to be reviewed. If you don't want bad feedback, don't give it!