Chapter Eleven: Let Me Walk Away From Your Locked Doors

Marco

There was blood all over the floor. I didn't see Andrew at first, but then I spotted him in a heap by the toilet. He had no shirt on, and when I got closer, I saw the big, jagged "X" carved into his chest, right over his heart. I put a hand over my mouth and held back tears as I approached him. Ever since he'd started cutting himself, as I learned from Rory, Andrew had never passed out. He was always fully conscious and aware of what he had done; slurring apologies as he got weaker and weaker.

Not this time.

He wasn't awake. At first, I thought he was dead, but then I noticed the steady rise and fall of his chest. I felt for his pulse anyway, and it was very weak. I knew what I had to do, no matter how angry he would be at me when he woke up. I dialed 911, told them my emergency, and quickly hung up. I didn't want to be on the phone with some woman who tried to calm me down.

That was when I saw the shower wall. There was more blood covering it. And the words. He'd spelled something out in his own blood: ALWAYS ALONE.

The tears came then. I was unable to hold them back any longer as I rushed forward to clean it. Grabbing a towel from the floor, I rubbed at it until it wasn't recognizable as any words at all. My eyes clouded over and I could no longer see. I struggled to breathe as I felt my throat closing up.

I wasn't sure what was happening, but I felt my chest start to tighten. I clutched at it as I stumbled out of the tub and went to Andrew, falling down near him. I thought I was having a heart attack. The world grew dark as I heard the paramedics rushing in. One of them started to talk to me. I couldn't even hear what he was saying because all of my senses were slowly escaping me.

"Help him," I choked out, lifting a weak arm and pointing at Andrew. Then everything went black.

Ellie

I'd barely been in this place for two weeks, and I was already being pulled into this boy drama. Marco had called me twenty minutes earlier, while I was out to dinner with a group of girls from my science class. I hadn't been having that great of a time anyway, and it gave me an excuse to leave.

Apparently Lindsey was going to jail, and they were throwing a going away party for him. I made my way to the address that he'd given me; it was some kind of bar. Of course, since I wasn't actually old enough, and hadn't had a recent interest in getting drunk; so I didn't have a fake ID. And when I got to the door, a big, burly guy stood in my way. I tried to simply walk right past him, hoping he wouldn't notice me, but he held a hand out and shoved me back. I'd been about to give him a piece of my mind when Thomas appeared. My stomach fluttered

"It's cool, she's with me," he told the guy. I saw him discreetly slip the guy some money. He nodded his head and let me pass.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?" I asked as he led me deep into the building.

"Not much to tell," he said, his voice low. I could tell right away that he didn't want to talk about it at all. He grabbed my hand as we neared a crowd of people dancing, not wanting to lose me in it. We both looked at each other as soon as he'd done it. I was sure that he felt the same thing I did.

The feeling, whatever it was, disappeared, because Thomas dropped my hand quickly. I shrugged it off and followed him to the back of the place. We were going to the VIP room, which was nearly empty when we got there.

"I managed to reserve it," he said, as if it were explanation enough.

"You must be one important customer here then," I said.

"I have to get back out there," he said, leaving quickly. I felt strange. I'd just had some sort of moment with a guy I haven't known very long, but then he rushed off. Well, he does have a girlfriend, I reasoned with myself. Leave it to me to be interested in someone who's already taken.

I looked around the room, noticing that there were only two people in there. One was the bartender, leaning against the bar, looking bored out of his mind, and the other was slumped on a couch on the far wall. I walked over to him and sat down, startling him out of whatever his thoughts were.

"You must be Rory," I said, extending a hand. "I've heard so much about you."

Lindsey

I slowly made my way to the bathroom and tried the door. Sure enough it was unlocked, and as quietly as possible, I let myself in, closing and locking the door behind me.

"Hello?" Theresa called out. She must have heard the door close.

"It's me," I mumbled, suddenly unsure of myself. She stuck her head out of the shower, and I felt my breath catch in my chest. The way her hair was neatly tucked up, the drops of water trailing down her cheeks; everything about her was beautiful. Especially the fact that I shouldn't be doing what I was about to do.

I hadn't even realized that I was walking closer to her, and I was suddenly within arms length. She reached out for me, exposing one of her breasts. I started to unbutton my shirt, but she pulled me by my arms and kissed me hard, pushing the curtain away. The water was cascading off of her body and onto mine as she ripped my shirt open, scattering a few buttons. I got my own pants and boxers down in two seconds flat; my shoes and socks had been discarded earlier by her bed.

Finally ready, I climbed into the shower with her, still keeping our kiss in tact. Her tongue searched my mouth for awhile, until I finally lifted her up, and she wrapped her legs around me. We were already breathing heavy as it started, with water dripping into our mouths.

Our moans could not be heard over the shower; or at least we hoped they couldn't be. She groaned as I shoved her hard into the wall, finally finishing the job.

Rory

I was in my own private world, thinking about Marco, when a skinny little redhead plopped down next to me. As soon as I really looked at her, I knew who she was. Marco's best friend, Ellie.

"And you must be Ellie," I said, shaking the hand that was waiting.

"The one and only," she replied, smiling. I liked this girl already. "Do you know where Marco is by any chance?"

"No, and I don't even know why I'm here. Lindsey isn't even my friend. Well, I guess maybe he is, a little. Marco sort of pulled us all together," I explained, sighing. "Though sometimes I wish he hadn't."

"That can't be true," Ellie said.

"Why not?" I asked. How would she know how I felt?

"Because you love him. So you want to be with him, no matter who his friends are, and who you have to pretend to like…" she trailed off, as if she was just realizing something herself. She slumped down in the chair and started playing with her hair.

"Who's the guy?" I asked, eager to take the focus off of me and put it on her.

"Jay. I fell in love with him even though we were so different. I hated all of his friends, but I didn't care if I had to be around them, as long as he was there."

"But then he broke your heart." Maybe she did know how I felt.

"But it's not too late to get him back," she said, popping up excitedly. "Come on!"

"Whoa, wait! You're bringing me to Canada to get your ex back?" I asked. I really had no desire to go to Canada. Because Marco wouldn't be there.

"No! He's an ass and I never want to see him again. We're going to find Marco and get him back for you," she stated, a smile growing on her face.

"Sorry Ellie, but we're not." I went back into my depressive state. "I won't do that to Jesse. Marco's happy right now, and I won't do that to him either." I walked away from her before she could say anything more.

Remy

There was a party going on, but I had to have a session with Kelly first. I was getting better at pretending I wanted it; that way, maybe Kelly would let me go more easily. Because if I pretended that I didn't want to leave, but I had to, he would usually let me go after only an hour or so.

Before I left for his room, I went though the same routine I always did. I trudged to the bathroom, shoved my finger down my throat, and threw up anything I'd eaten that day. It was easier that way, and it was the only thing I could control.

I brushed my teeth and washed my face off before making my way to the one place I hated the most. Whenever I went in that room, my body started to shake, and all I wanted to do was go back to my bathroom and relieve myself of all the pain I was feeling. I felt so disgusting and worthless.

"Hey there baby," Kelly whispered in my ear. I forced a smile and kissed him, knowing full well that he liked me to take charge. "I'm so glad you came around. I knew you'd see things my way sooner or later," he said, closing the door and locking it.

"I have to ask you something first," I said, running a hand down his arm to keep him occupied by my touch. I remembered something about Nate, and it had been on my mind for quite some time.

"Ask away. We've got all night." I silently prayed he wouldn't keep me there that long before speaking.

"My friend, Nate…I saw him coming out of here one night. He says you were tutoring him. Is that true?" I asked, truly afraid of the answer he might give me.

"You know very well that I don't actually tutor anyone," he chuckled. "But for the record, I tutor him just like I tutor you. I use the same methods and everything."

He kissed me as I fell silent. I felt bile rising in my throat and wanted to be back in my bathroom, getting rid of it. I pushed him off of me and backed up. How could Nate do something like this? I thought he'd been shy. Craig was his first boyfriend. And then, Craig left…

Kelly came at me fast, angry that I'd pushed him off. I backed up even more, only to feel the wall behind my back. He slammed his lips into mine, knocking my head into the wall in the process. He nearly choked me with his tongue, and became even angrier as I gagged.

He grabbed the hair on the top of my head and slammed my head into the wall, once, twice, three times; and then everything went black.

Theresa

I pushed myself away from Lindsey, back underneath the water. I struggled to stand as my legs grew weak, and he tried to help me up as I fell, but I pulled myself from his grip.

"Get out!" I screamed, letting the tears come. What had I just done? He must have felt the same way I did, because he stumbled out, wrapping a towel around himself and grabbing his clothes. I watched as he struggled with the door, finally got it open, and walked out.

I forced myself to stand and washed my body everywhere. After what I'd put Thomas through, how could I have even done that? Because I'm in love with Lindsey. No, I can't be. It's not possible. I don't even know him.

I got out of the shower and pulled on my underwear and threw on a dress. I quickly dried the tears from my cheeks and put makeup on. When I finally got out to my room, he was gone. I was glad that I didn't have to talk to him, but I knew I'd still have to go to the party. There was no way I'd let Thomas get suspicious.

I had sex with Lindsey because I felt sorry for him, that's all. He's going to jail and he'll be alone there for a long time. He needed that, and I was just being a friend to him.

If all of that was true, then why did I not want him to leave? Why did I still want him to be in that shower with me, making love to me?

Nate

I walked into the party with my special guest in tow. He hadn't wanted to come at all, but I dragged him along, telling him that it was time he met my friends. By the time we got there, the party was full.

The only people I didn't see were Remy, Andrew, and Marco. And the first person we came upon was Thomas. He looked like he was going to explode when he saw us.

"Hey Thomas," I said casually, as if nothing was going on. "I'd like you to meet my boyfriend, Tyler."

"Drop the act Nate. I know he's not your boyfriend," he hissed, glaring at Tyler.

"Actually, I am," Tyler spoke up. He pressed his lips into mine and we kissed for a minute, while he ran an arm down my back. When we finally broke apart, Thomas was still there, fuming.

"Can I talk to you?" he asked, dragging me off to the side before I could even answer him.

"I'll be right back! Grab us a few drinks!" I yelled to Tyler.

"What were you thinking?" Thomas yelled. "Bringing your fucking dealer to this party?"

"He's my boyfriend," I spat. "Learn to like it, because he'll be sticking around."

"I don't know what you're trying to prove, but you're just desperate. I know Craig broke your heart, but you don't need to be screwing anything with an asshole!" he snapped.

"Seeing as you're not even my friend anymore, I don't think it's any of your business!" I yelled right back, walking away from him.

Jesse

I didn't even know why I was at this stupid party. Everyone was dancing and having a good time, except Lindsey. He was at the bar, pounding drinks back like crazy. Oh, and I wasn't having fun either.

Andrew and Marco never showed up. Marco had gone to find him, and invite him. He told me to go on to the party and they'd be there soon. But they never were.

I contemplated joining Lindsey at the bar, but I knew I couldn't. My daughter was waiting for me at home. I'd left her there, sleeping, because I knew she'd be fine. Marco was supposed to be here two hours ago. We were going to only stay for maybe half hour, then go back home. So I thought Gracie would be okay if I just left her.

I decided she'd been left too long, so I made my way back to the dorms. No one even noticed that I'd been there anyway. When I got back into my room, she was there, still fast asleep. I breathed a sigh of relief that nothing had happened to her, and mentally smacked myself for even leaving her in the first place.

Marco let me down. I knew where he was too. He was off fucking Andrew, his ex-boyfriend. The two guys I felt something for were together, and I was here, with a little baby that wasn't even mine.

A/N: This chapter took place on Saturday, January 14th. Sorry if the beginning isn't all that great, but I started writing it at 5:30 in the morning on four hours of sleep. Sorry it's up a day late guys. I had so much crap to do yesterday that I only got half of it done by 10. And I was too tired.