Part: (20/?)

Writer: Az K Mello

Summery: things get taken.

Warning: mega angst. Buffy bashing, don't read it and don't flame. I've warned you, only idiots don't read the liner notes and then bitch.

Xander smiled at the needy way Angel held him. He felt like he truly belonged somewhere for the first time in his life. "Want you," whispered the vampire, "Have me, Xander." For a moment Xander went still and bit into his lip, before he could speak Angel laughed, "Selfish bottom." Unwittingly the vampire had managed to say the most perfect thing at the best possible moment.

Because then, instead of freaking out Xander laughed, "No, well maybe. But that's not it. . . it's just. . ." He smiled bashfully at Angel, "Until last night I'd never been with a man." He saw the smile on Angel's face that said, "aww, it's that cute?". Blushing he looked down at his hands, "Or anyone in fact. I might fuck up and hurt you. Or worse, make an ass out of myself."

"That would be worse than hurting me?" Angel asked with a crooked smile.

"You're immortal, you'll heal. I, on the other hand, have the ego of a teenage boy."

Angel laughed as he kissed his lover's forehead and pulled the boy on top of his body as he laid back. "You won't hurt me, I'll be with you every step of the way. And besides, I like a little pain: vampire." Xander just laughed and leaned into Angel's kiss.
Panting, Angel fell back against the bed and pulled Xander with him. "My god."

"I'm taking that as a compliment," Xander laughed.

"Xander?" asked Angel suddenly. "Why didn't you tell me?"

The boy studied his mate for a moment before saying, "I didn't want to make things weirder than they already were. It was hard enough without me playing the blushing innocent. Besides, I'd already bared everything to you and I was so scared it was a spell. I wanted to have one thing that, come the morning, you couldn't use against me."

Nodding Angel said, "I get it." He sighed as he pulled his fingers through Xander's hair. "I would have liked to have done something special though."

"It was special," said Xander. Angel's look of confusion made him smile, "It was with you. It was perfect."

"Yeah but." Angel just sighed again, "I don't know, there should have been poetry and candles or something."

Laughing softly Xander said, "I've never been good with candles: I generally burn myself. And poetry goes right over my head, I've never been smart like that," he saw Angel open his mouth to argue. "Hey! I'll write you a poem!" He leaned up on his elbows and surveyed his lover. "I know a guy called Angel," he paused trying to think of the next line, "Nothing rhymes with Angel, it's like orange." Angel just laughed. "Moving right along," Xander said with a happy laugh. "New poem, I'm in love with a man. He's no Tom, Dick, or Sam. He doesn't tan. He has a great can," Angel sealed the boy's mouth with a kiss. Xander could see the sky through the high window, it was broad daylight. daylight. "It's Sunday. I have to go to school tomorrow. Am I a wuss if I'm scared?"