A/N For guest writers, the ones that are still open are: 3, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 19, 20. Anyone who wants to write one, PM me so that I don't give it to someone else, and then email the chapter to me when you're done.

Hope you like it!

11: Ask him when was the last time he took a bath.

Ozai, as you might have guessed, never for a moment thought that Lara hadn't done something. I mean, really! Look at it logically.

Something weird happened.

It happened to Ozai.

It happened while Lara was in the room.

Lara was annoyed at Ozai.

When Lara was annoyed, she became annoying. (At least, more annoying than she usually was)

Who do you think did the weird thing that happened to Ozai while Lara was in the room and annoyed at Ozai, and therefore became more annoying than she usually was?

That's right! Katara!

Yeah, that was sarcasm. Sorry. It was definitely Lara. No doubt about it. Nuh-uh. Definitely here. Anybody could guess that. Very simple. Undoubtedly.

Okay, I'll shut up now.

The point is, Lara annoyed Ozai (see previous chapter) and Ozai didn't believe her when she said she hadn't done it.

And so, Ozai decided to enact the worst punishment possible upon his younger sister.

Yes, it was evil. But he was the Fire Lord. Of course he was evil.

Yes, it was cruel. But he was the Fire Lord. Of course he was cruel.

Yes, it was unfair. But he was the Fire Lord. Of course he was unfair.

Lara protested all of these things. But Ozai, being the Fire Lord, didn't listen to her.

And so, Lara's punishment was carried out as planned.

"You can't do this to me!" wailed Lara.

"I'm the Fire Lord! I can do whatever I want!"

"You're not my father!"

"No, I'm your brother! But I'm also the Fire Lord, so I can do whatever I want!"

"You wouldn't do this to your younger sister!"

"I'm the Fire Lord! I can do whatever I want!"

"You have really uncreative comebacks!"

"I'm the Fire Lord! I can do whatever I want!"

Lara paused for a moment, wondering if that made any sense. She decided to pretend that she understood it, and just use that response as a way of getting back at her dear older brother.

"See, that's exactly what I'm talking about," Lara told Ozai calmly. "You just keep bringing the fact that you're the Fire Lord into the argument. That's not what we're discussing at all."

"I beg to differ," Ozai retorted. "We are discussing your lack of respect for me. As the Fire Lord, I deserve and require respect from all of my subjects, even and especially you."

"That's not what we're arguing about at all. Anyways, I'm your sister, so I don't count."

There was another pause as Lara wondered whether it was really a good idea to say that she didn't count, and Ozai wondered how to use that to his advantage. Both eventually decided to ignore that.

"As my sister, you are a very powerful, high-ranking person in the Fire Nation, correct?" asked Ozai.

"Yeeeeessss…." Lara contemplated, unsure what that had to do with anything.

"People look up to you. You have to set a good example of obedience and respect for the government."

"See, that's exactly what I mean!" Lara protested. "You keep throwing the fact that you're the Fire Lord back in my face. But it doesn't really change anything. Your comebacks were still extremely uncreative."

Don't worry, this rambling has a point. Because, see, Lara had a plan. A spontaneous plan, but a plan nonetheless.

She was going to try to outwit the Fire Lord.

Not that she didn't attempt that all the time. And occasionally succeed, too. But this time, she was going to try to do something on purpose that she had done so many times on accident.

She was going to try to make Ozai forget what they were arguing about in the first place.

And if he forgot before giving his orders to anyone, than Lara would go unpunished. And that was good, since the punishment that Ozai had planned for his sister was so terrible, it doesn't even bear speaking about.

So I won't tell you. I'll keep you in suspense. Because for once, I have something to keep you in suspense about that wasn't in the title.

You feel suspenseful yet? Too bad. I'm not going to tell you anyway.

Alright, so, while I was blabbering about punishments and suspense, the argument going on between Ozai and Lara was continuing without any mishap.

It was continuing maturely and calmly, calmly and maturely. For them, anyway.

Well, the point is, it was continuing. And most of it is irreverent. Irrelevant. Whatever.

Actually, it was sort of both… Whatever. Not important.

Okay, here we go. Back to the topic. Forgetting that I ever began to ramble.

Well, don't forget the important points. There will be a test, after the story ends.

Oh, yeah right. I've had enough of tests, too.

Returning to the point…

"Wait… what were we arguing about again?" asked Ozai. Lara carefully suppressed a smirk.

"I'm not sure," she lied. "Why don't we just forget about it and go get some hot chocolate?"

"No," Ozai replied. "I'm not giving you any more caffeine. You're hyper enough as it is."

"I'm not hyper! I'm just… misunderstood!"

"You are too hyper! You're the most hyper person I know!"

"Well… you're the most stinky person I know!"

Ozai's eyes popped out of his head. Well, not literally, that'd be gross. Really gross. And then he wouldn't be able to see anything. Which wouldn't be too bad. It would make things much easier for Aang. But it would be very bad for Lara.

After all, some of her pranks require Ozai being able to see what annoying thing she's doing now. And if Ozai couldn't see, than she'd feel bad about taking advantage of that to prank him behind his back.

So she might actually stop pranking him.

Well, not really. She'd probably just slow down a little. But then this story would be much more boring. And Lara would be much more bored. And she'd probably kill everyone out of sheer boredom.

But none of that speculation matters, since Ozai's eyes only popped out of his head figuratively. Got that? As in they widened in an expression of surprise.

And now we return to our regular broadcast.

Recap: "Well… you're the most stinky person I know!"

Ozai's eyes… widened. I'm not going to go into all of that confusion again.

"What… did… you… say?" asked Ozai in a strangled voice.

You know what? I'm not even going to go into why that's not to be taken literally. I'm just going to tell the story, and shut up. No more rants about figurative and literal phrases. Not for me. My ranting days are over! For the next half-hour, at least.

"I said, you're the most stinky person I know! I mean, seriously. When was the last time you took a bath?"

And then, Ozai did remember what they were arguing about. And he remembered the terrible punishment he was going to perform on Lara.

"Lara…" he began ominously. Lara, sensing what he was about to say, backed into a corner nervously.

But it was too late. Ozai was finishing his sentence.

"Go to your room!"

Lara stalked out of the Throne Room, and a few still-terrified guests snuck in. The social-gathering-designed-to-remind-the-populace-who-their-leader-was-and-to-improve-confidence-in-the-governing-body/useless-waste-of-time/fun/party (which was originally Lara's birthday party) was in full swing.

But Lara was not about to let her birthday party continue without a bit of annoyance from her. Oh, no!

So she poked her head back into the room.

"Stinky!" Lara called to the Fire Lord.

And now his temper was frayed to the breaking point, and Ozai snapped. Again.

"LARA!"

You guess it! Lara's response was: "What?"