And so it ends. Wow, that was about as dramatic as the disembodied voice. Sorry.
Anyway, thanks to Star Wars nut for suggesting this in a review to Alaska Angel. I don't own the idea for this chapter any more than I did the others.
Also, The List that the servant reads is a combination of all of the ways, which basically adds up to Alaska Angel's original story. So, I must tell you that I don't own that, sadly. The only change I made was to put it in past tense, so that it would make more sense. I don't own the past tense, either.
Hope you liked it. Drop a review to me or Alaska Angel if you did!
Epilogue: Still be alive after you've done all this.
Ozai was in a bad mood. A very bad mood. And Lara wanted to know why. As you might have guessed, that's not a good combination.
Lara had gotten him to answer all of her yes or no questions, and was proceeding to guess why he was in a bad mood. Never mind how she did that. Something to do with a few Generals finding out about an odd little toy called a Furby…
"Does it have to do with a person?" asked Lara.
"Yes," admitted Ozai.
"Is it the Avatar?"
"No."
"Is it Zuko?"
"No."
"Is it someone in the Fire Nation?"
"Yes."
"Is it someone in the family?"
"Yes."
Lara considered this for a moment. Contrary to popular belief, she wasn't stupid. She just did stupid things quite often. But she wasn't stupid.
Here are the facts of the situation.
Ozai was in a bad mood.
It had to do with someone in his family.
His family consisted of:
-Zuko (who was considered a disgrace)
-Iroh (who was considered a traitor)
-Azula (who -was considered none of these things) and
-Lara (who was considered annoying).
Iroh, Zuko, and Azula were all gone off somewhere.
Only Lara was in the area.
Lara was annoying.
Ozai was easily annoyed by Lara.
Lara knew what these facts all put together meant. It meant that Ozai was in a bad mood because of her. But she wasn't about to admit that she knew that, because that would be admitting that she wasn't stupid. And that was that!
Sorry.
"Is it a direct descendant of yours?"
"No."
"Is it someone who is dead?"
"No."
"Is it someone who is alive?"
"No."
"Ozai, remember the Furby."
"Yes."
"Is it Iroh?"
"No."
"Is it yourself?"
"No."
"Is it… possibly… me? Sweet, un-annoying, innocent, lovable, kind, charming, cute, childlike, delightful little me?"
"Yes."
Lara gave him her best puppy-dog face. Well, it wasn't a very good puppy-dog. Lara looked quite a bit like Azula, but with less makeup, and less ruthless. Not cute.
"Why, Ozai? Why ever would you be in a bad mood because of me?"
Ozai turned to glare at his little sister.
"Lara, in the past three years, you have done quite a few annoying things. So many that I can't even list them!"
"Try, Ozai," pleaded Lara. "I want to know what I did wrong. Just list the top twenty annoying things I've done in three years. It can't be that hard. How many can there be?"
The Fire Lord's glare deepened. "An uncountable number. But do you really want to hear the top twenty?"
"Yes."
"Alright then. Here it goes." Ozai then called in a random servant.
"Read my sister The List!" he ordered dramatically
The servant cleared his throat and began to read.
1: Told him he's being a bad boy and is on time out. Didn't let him off the chair.
2: Asked him when he was going to reveal the scar Zuko gave him during the Agni Kai. Gasped dramatically when people said they didn't know what you were talking about.
3: When he got a letter saying Zhao was dead, patted his shoulder soothingly saying you understood and it would all work out in the end…then added 'for Aang that is.' Possible treason?
4: When you walked into the War Room, you looked around with tears in your eyes. When someone asked what was wrong, said 'nothing, it's just so stinking hot in here and it's really heightening the aromas.'
5: Gave him a Furby for his birthday. Snickered when it talks and scares him. Looked innocent when he glares at you.
6: Snuck up next to him and cracked your knuckles right in his ear. Hid behind Azula when he came after you.
7: Laughed maniacally whenever the Generals in the War Room thought of another plot. Said that Iroh was better then all of them and you didn't understand how they could have possibly let him go.
8: Started singing 'The Song That Never Ends' whenever there was a small pause in the meetings.
9: Mixed gas and water and dumped it over his head. When he was about to flame up, said that if he did, he would explode.
10: Casually explained that his son was going to marry a Water Bender. Said he couldn't do anything about it since he banished him.
11: Asked him when was the last time he took a bath.
12: Knocked on his door late at night. Ran away before he opens it.
13: Encouraged him to take a yoga class. Didn't tell him what it is until he was already there.
14: Whacked him at random intervals and yelled 'mosquito'…very loudly. When asked what they are, just smiled and said they carry deadly poisons. Then looked at a General and said that there was one on his arm.
15: Watched him curiously. When asked about it, said you didn't know how he could be threatened by an eleven year old kid.
16: At a feast, played with your food.
17: Pouted and gave him puppy eyes when he was about to blow up at you.
18: Told him his crown was really rather silly looking and offered to make him a new one. When you gave him the flower shaped piece of metal, you didn't tell him where he old crown is so he had to wear it.
19: Slipped some sleeping powder into his food before a grand feast. Left obvious clues that it was you so the cooks didn't get blamed.
20: Talked to thin air before he came around the corner. Said you were talking to Sozin and he never wanted the war to begin with and was disgraced that Iroh didn't take the throne instead.
Lara considered that for a moment.
"So you're still annoyed by all of those things? Even though some of them I did over three years ago?"
Ozai glared at her. "No. That's not what annoys me. What annoys me is number twenty-one."
"But there is no number twenty-one!" exclaimed Lara.
That's when the servant broke in. "Actually, there is one that was never recorded."
"Read it," commanded Ozai.
"But, Fire Lord, it was never written down!" protested the servant.
"Then recite it!" he growled.
"Yes sir," the servant agreed, bowing.
"Still are alive after you've done all this"
Lara stared at her brother. "So… you're annoyed at me because… I'm alive?"
Ozai nodded. "Yes. Because you're my sister, I can't kill you. For several reasons, none of which I'm going to bother going over. But if anyone else had attempted even one thing off of that list, they would be nothing but a small pile of ashes, and a testimony of why nobody crosses the Fire Lord."
Lara was stunned. Because she had just realized something. If she was annoying simply by being alive, than every moment of her life, waking or sleeping, whether she tried or not, she would be annoying someone. She would continue to annoy throughout her entire life. Until she was dead, there would be no respite for Ozai.
"I'm that annoying?" she asked.
"You're the most annoying person I've ever met!" exclaimed the Fire Lord. Then he stopped, because he had noticed something very surprising.
Lara was crying.
"Oh, come on," he said. "I…"
Then, to his surprise, Lara suddenly hugged him. "That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me!" she sobbed. "Thank you so much!"
"Uh… You're welcome…" muttered Ozai, shaking his sister off.
He started to stand, but was stopped by a noise that sounded suspiciously like paper rustling on his back.
Reaching over his shoulder and grabbing the offending object, the Fire Lord drew it into his sightline. It was a small piece of parchment with writing on it. 'Kick me', read the parchment.
It was probably around that point that Ozai realized something. Just because she was annoying simply by being alive, didn't mean Lara wasn't going to be annoying for other reasons, too. She would be annoying him forever.
But that was all you really could expect from someone like Lara of the Fire Nation.
Not to say that Ozai was going to accept that calmly, of course.
"LARA!"
Lara smiled. "What?"