Disclaimer: ya ya ya I don't own Harry potter j.k.rowling dose

comedy gal: Thanks for the suggestion, I understand what you're saying, but I can't really try it out on any of my future chapters because I've already written the whole story. Actually, I wrote it last year and am just reposting it on my new account now. This was my first story. And, I call him Tom, because that is his name, and that's what I imagine Harry might call him, because it makes him even madder, remembering his Muggle father's name.
Fred and George Weasley were walking down Diagon Alley watching how people opened various stores, and were preparing for the upcoming day. They were excited, because Zonko's had ordered a big shipment of canary creams, ton-tongue toffees, and various other pranking items, and they were getting the check today. While they were opening the door to their shop, someone clutching a bunch of papers, and an animal, came flying out of the fireplace.

"George? Is that an owl?"

"No Fred actually I believe it's a human."

"You idiot. It's obviously a human. I meant the animal in his or her arms."

"Oh yeah I think it is judging by the fact that it's hooting. Look! They're getting up!"

"Come on let's go see who it is and what they want."

"All right." They went inside the store and waited for the person to get up. He let go of his owl and it flew around the room shaking soot off of itself.

"Hey!" Fred shouted. "Stop! You are getting soot all over the store!" He pulled out his wand and said a spell that cleaned off the owl and the store. The owl gave its owner a reproachful look and landed on the store counter.

"Who are you?" George asked when the person got up and started dusting himself off. He took off his glasses (which were broken) and said "Occulus reparo". The glasses were immediately repaired. He looked up at them after putting the glasses on.

"Harry!"

"Er hi guys."

"Where did you come from? You're all scratched up and bruised!" (Those was from the crucatius curse)

"Yeah," George narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "And how come you stopped writing to us two years ago?"

"I can't really te-"

"You are going to tell us whether you like it or not. You really hurt Hermione and Ron and you owe us all an explanation. Right George?"

"Right." They stood there with their arms crossed waiting for his answer.

"All right I'll tell you guys but on one condition."

"What's that?"

"You can't tell anyone. Not your sister or any of your brothers, or your parents, or Hermione. Nobody hears about this ok?"

"Ok. Now tell us!"

"All right. So on Friday night I came home and noticed my roommate wasn't there. So I decided he must be late and went to send Hermione a letter, but it had been turned into a portkey. The portkey took me to Voldemort's lair where he tortured me with the crucatius curse and dementors for two years. Finally Peter Pettigrew came and gave me some floo powder and then killed himself. Now I have to go into hiding and disguise myself for a couple of years. Happy?" They just stood there staring at him. "Um guys?"

"Oh right sorry. We were just trying to process all of that. Anyway people are going to start coming soon so what are we waiting for? Fred, please take Harry into the backroom. I have to deal with this customer. Go quickly! Before they see him!"

"Right, follow me Harry." Fred took Harry into the backroom, where he told him to sit down and wait for them to come back. He left the room to go help George. Harry could vaguely hear them talking.

"Welcome to Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. Can we help you?" the customer said something Harry couldn't hear entirely but he did hear his name. He didn't recognize the voice though. He inched closer to the door to listen to what they were saying.

"Malfoy? What are you doing here? Get out! We aren't selling you anything! No! Of course Harry's not here! We haven't heard from him for two years." Harry's blood ran cold. They were looking for him. He had no doubt that if he didn't get out of England soon, he'd be found too. Then he heard George saying.

"Yeah! Now get out!"

"All right, all right I'll go. But not before I check out the backroom."

"Hey! You can't go back there. Malfoy, I'm warning you."

"Oh come on. I'm only going to have a little peek. If I don't see him I'll leave."

"Fine Malfoy, but it's a waste of time. There's no one back there."

"Really, George is right. You are wasting your time. Why do you want Harry anyway?"

"Business."

"Really? I never knew Harry was a Death Eater. Did you Fred?"

"Nope. When did that happen Draco?"

"I'm not a Death Eater."

"Oh. Well then what do you and Harry do? I heard he's a Quidditch player; they haven't played any games for a while. Their Keeper is injured. Somewhere in America wasn't it George?"

"Yeah. I never knew you were a Quidditch player. Wait a minute. How come you are looking for him in England? I was sure the American team was in America."

"How can he be a Quidditch player if he's been missing for two years?" Draco snarled.

"Well if he's been missing for two years, how can you be looking for him because of business?" Harry grinned. They had him there. Draco didn't answer. Instead he came into the backroom and opened the door. Harry barely managed to conceal himself behind a couple of boxes of dungbombs that were stacked on top of each other, when Malfoy started walking around the room.

"That's more than a peek Malfoy!"

"Oh shut up," Draco muttered under his breath. He looked around for a minute and he couldn't find Harry. Finally he got so frustrated he just knocked over the stack of dungbomb boxes and left the store. It was lucky Harry was lying on the floor behind the bottom box, or else Draco would have seen him. Then again, all the boxes burst open when they fell, and a bunch of dungbombs exploded on Harry. Fred and George heard the noise and came running in. They used a spell that cleared the smell out of the room so it wouldn't smell so bad. But surprisingly, it still smelled like dungbombs.

"Harry? Are you ok?"

"Perfect," said Harry getting up with dungbomb shells falling off of him. Fred and George suddenly realized where the smell was coming from and started laughing uncontrollably. "Hey! It's not funny!" they continued laughing. "All right, it's funny but could you please help me here?"

"Oh. Right. Sorry." They said the spell and Harry stopped smelling like dung.

"Anyway we've got to fix you up."

"Fix me up?"

"Yeah you know a disguise."

"No really I can do it mys-"

"Don't be ridiculous Harry. You're safe in our hands." Harry wasn't entirely sure about this but he knew it was no use protesting.

"Ok fine."

They had just finished making his eyes brown and his hair blond ("In the future Harry, stick with the black" Fred had said") when they heard someone yell,

"Fred, George? Are you there?"

"Oh my God it's mom! Don't let her come back here. Fred go stall her, I'll finish Harry. Then we'll put our makeover to the test." Fred grinned and left. They could hear him and Mrs. Weasley talking.

"Hi Fred. Where's George?"

"Oh he's showing our new assistant around." Harry thought he was just saying that so that they would have an excuse for keeping someone in the backroom. "They'll be out soon."

"Ok. I'll wait here then. Ron, Ginny, and I are supposed to meet here at 8:30. We knew you opened at 8:00 so we decided to come here. I still don't know why we decided to leave so early." Harry suddenly saw the door grow four inches.

"Uh George? Your door just grew."

"No my dear friend, I'm afraid you've shrunk."

"WHAT?"

"What was that Fred?"

"Oh I guess he's excited about something. Let me show you our new items that are for sale." Harry made sure they were out of hearing when he turned around to face George.

"George you turned me into a midget!"

"I know. I go all out for disguises."

"Change me back! It feels awful being so short."

"Aww come on. Being 5'4 isn't so bad is it?"

"It is when a minute ago you were 6'1."

"Sorry but I'm not changing you back. Believe me in a couple of years when we change you back, you'll be 6'1 again!"

"How would you feel being eight feet tall George?" Harry said taking out his wand and advancing on George.

"Not so very good Harry. So that's why I have to do this." He easily grabbed Harry's wand and held it above his head.

"George!" yelled Harry while he was jumping up and down trying to get his wand. Finally he gave up. "Fine. I'll be a midget." He sighed. "Can I have a mirror?"

"But of course." George conjured up a mirror and let Harry examine himself. His hair came down to his shoulder and was blond, and neat. He had been very pale from being locked in a little room, with one window for two years, but now he was tan. His scar had been covered up by makeup, and his eyebrows had been bleached. Of course, he was also four inches taller and his eyes were blue, instead of green. "One last thing. Take your glasses and save them somewhere." George said. Harry reluctantly took off his glasses and put them into his pocket. Then George conjured up silver, thin rimmed glasses and out them on Harry. Harry looked in the mirror once more and couldn't recognize himself. "Well? What do you think?" George asked.

"I think I look like someone who is colorblind, and forgot that he is a man." George laughed. "Could you cut the hair?"

"Sure" George waved his wand and Harry felt his hair get much shorter. He looked into the mirror for the last time and saw that he had a mushroom cut now. He sighed. He still didn't like it and it felt weird.

"It's so different."

"Exactly!"

"I guess it will just take some getting used to."

"All right let's go show mom and Fred our new assistant." They walked out of the backroom. Ron was standing there with Ginny and Mrs. Weasley.

"When did they get here?" Harry whispered to George.

"Dunno."

"Finally," Ron said. "How long does it take to show someone around the backroom George?"

"Well, we had to clean up some stuff that fell over, due to a previous…customer."

"Oh. Who's this?" Ron jerked his head in Harry's direction.

"This is," George looked at Harry and he grinned, "Midge."

"How old is he?" Ron asked looking "Midge" up and down.

"Twenty-one just like you little bro," Fred grinned.

"Really? He looks a little…short."

"Don't be so mean Ronnykins. He's just a midget." Harry decided it was time to step in.

"Yup! That's me. Midge the Midget" Fred and George sniggered. Ron just scowled. Harry decided that Midge didn't like Ron. After all he was being rude and immature.

"And who are you?" he asked coldly

"Ron Weasley. Fred and George's brother," Ron said haughtily. He sounded like Percy. Harry snorted in the attempt to hide his laughter. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing."

"Well then why did you almost start laughing?" Ron challenged. Harry got angry.

"I'm allowed to laugh, or almost laugh when I want aren't I?" he shot back.

"Well it sounded like you were laughing at me!"

"Well what if I was?" Ron was about to retaliate when they heard someone say,

"Hem hem." They all looked wildly around expecting to see Umbridge standing there. Then they all noticed it was Ginny. Harry laughed.

"Oh my God. I expected to see Umbridge standing here with another decree in her hand." Harry said forgetting the situation. Everyone laughed before suddenly Ginny turned on him.

"How do you know about Umbridge?" she asked suspiciously.

"Um… She was a teacher at my school for a month. Substitute."

"Really? And what school would that be?" Ron inquired.

"And why do you care?"

"Because she taught at our school for a year and kept passing Educational Decrees."

"Midge are you really twenty-one?" Ginny asked.

"Yes," Harry said icily.

"Well like Ron said you certainly don't look it. You look more like twelve." Harry suddenly lost it. He rounded on her.

"What is it you guys have against me? I never did anything to you! I just met you and right away you turn on me. You and Ron! What is your problem? Sure maybe I'm short for my age but so what? That doesn't mean anything!" Ginny was shocked for a moment and so was Ron but he recovered faster.

"Well, your temper is just like your height apparently." Harry turned to glare at him.

"Lay off Ronnykins." Using the nickname George had used a little while before. He knew Ron hated when people called him that. Before he could day anything Mrs. Weasley spoke up.

"You know, you remind me of someone. What's your last name?"

"Moland," Harry said thinking fast.

"Oh. You know who you remind me of?" Harry shook his head. "You remind me of Harry Potter. Yes that's it. Harry Potter." Everyone stared at him.

"You know? You're right mom. He acts just like that jerk, Harry Potter," Ron said angrily and left the shop.

They all watched his retreating form. Then Harry asked,

"What's wrong with Harry Potter?"

"Well," Mrs. Weasley began, "he went to Hogwarts with Ron and his friend Hermione Granger. They were best friends for the whole seven years but after Hogwarts they never saw him anymore, and he never came to any Hogwarts reunions. Two years ago Hermione wrote him a letter, asking him for his address so we could all go visit him but he never replied. Instead his owl, who by the way looks very much like that owl over there," she pointed at Hedwig who was flying over to Harry, "kept coming back to Hermione without any letters. Even Albus Dumbledore, the headmaster at Hogwarts, sent him a note. He got a note back saying that Harry was all right and nothing else." Harry didn't remember sending Dumbledore anything. He figured the Death Eaters must have done it. "He didn't even answer Dumbledore's question that was in the note. We all began to worry, and since we don't get the Daily Prophet, we would go into Diagon Alley sometimes to see if they had noticed him disappearing. There was never anything like that in the Prophet.

"Finally, Ron and Hermione got angry and decided that if Harry wanted to ignore them like that they wouldn't stop him. So they stopped sending him letters, and his owl stopped coming. Now instead of the trio they were at school they are a twosome and they've never forgiven Harry. But they're just best friends. It seems so unnatural to see Hermione over at our house, without Harry there as well." She sighed sadly. "We all were mad at Harry too, until we tried sending him a letter. The owl came back in a week with the letter still tied to his leg. For some reason it couldn't find him. That's when my husband and I began to worry again. We checked the Daily Prophet even and we saw that it said he was missing! So we always looked at the paper in Diagon Alley until we saw the article that said he'd been sighted in Honolulu. That's when we stopped worrying about him. We just got angry at him for cutting off all contact with us, and making us worry and then just going to Honolulu. I know deep down we are all still worried, but the hurt and anger is stronger. Once we found out about Honolulu we stopped acknowledging the worry. We even stopped looking in the Prophet. We just took him out of our lives," she concluded. Harry stood there for a minute thinking.

"I heard about his roommate. Is he still living at Hogwarts?" Harry really wanted to know how Jesse was doing.

"Yes he is as a matter of fact. He's even been taking classes. He is in his second year now."

"How's that possible? You can only start you magical learning at eleven."

"Well he was very eager. And he is actually a very interesting person. Did you know he found Harry's Invisibility Cloak, tried it on, and wasn't even surprised or scared when he saw that he was invisible? He said he had the feeling like he had known all along and that it seemed perfectly normal to him? He even found Harry's broomstick, for the fun of it pretended to fly on it. When it did start flying, he was shocked, but riding the broom felt comfortable to him, like he'd done it before. When he got to Hogwarts, he had an accident and hit his head hard on the floor or a wall or something. They took him to St. Mungo's and there they discovered that he really was a wizard!" Harry was shocked. His roommate Jesse was a wizard?

"But how could he not know?"

"Well they didn't actually find out that he was a wizard, they found out that he had a very powerful memory charm cast on him when he was eighteen. They broke through it and he remembered everything, except what he learned in his first, second, and third year. So now he's taking classes again for three years. They even sorted him! He's in Gryffindor. He also teaches charms for students fifth year and above. Apparently he was a very good student at school."

"It all makes sense now," Harry muttered. How he couldn't remember anything after he was eleven until he was eighteen. How he wasn't scared of Harry when he found his broom and how he got used to the idea of an owl sleeping at night so quickly. Once he even caught Harry tying a letter to Hedwig's leg and telling her it was for Hermione, and he didn't even think Harry was crazy.

"What's that dear?"

"Oh! Nothing. Anyway about Harry Potter. What if he had a good reason for not writing? What if he couldn't? What if he hadn't actually been sighted in Honolulu?"

"His owl, Hedwig, would always get help for Harry when he was unable to do so. But she would just come back for more letters."

"Oh."

"What's that sticking out of your pocket, Moland?" Ginny suddenly said.

"It's nothing!" Harry said, trying to push his glasses back into his pocket. But Ginny was quicker. She leapt over and grabbed the glasses.

"They're glasses. Why do you have glasses in your pocket?"

"Spares, just in case mine break or something," Harry lied. Ginny snorted.

"Spares? In case your other ones get broken? These will get broken first if they're in your pocket. Hang on! These are like the glasses Harry wears!" Harry swallowed.

"So?" Fred stepped in. "A lot of people might have glasses like Harry's!"

"Yeah, I guess you're right," said Ginny doubtfully.

"Hey Fred," Harry butted in wanting desperately to get out of there. "Do you have a bathroom?"

"Yeah, it's in the backroom. Did George forget to show you?"

"I guess so," Harry shrugged and left. Once he was out of ear shot they started talking.

"Ginny what is your problem?" George hissed. Not wanting a fight, Mrs. Weasley whispered,

"What's that on the floor?" she pointed at the papers that had fallen out of Midge's pocket when Ginny had grabbed his glasses.

"I'm sure it's nothing," George said trying to grab the letters. But once again Ginny was too quick. She bent down and picked up the letters. She started reading with Mrs. Weasley reading over her shoulder.

"They're addressed to Harry," she murmured. "They're from Ron and Hermione!" Hedwig started hooting loudly. They barely managed to fold the letters up again (they hadn't read anything except who they were for and from) when Midge stepped out of the backroom. He eyed them and the letters suspiciously.

"Th – they fell out of your pocket" Ginny stammered. Midge looked at her and then walked over and grabbed the letters.

"Did you read them?"

"No, of course not"

"Good. If you'll excuse me I still need to use the bathroom," he said coldly and turning on his heal he walked back to the back room. They didn't know he was still listening to them though.

"Guys, I think that's Harry," Ginny said, nervously eyeing the door.

"What are you talking about?" Fred exclaimed. "How can that be Harry?"

"Please. Stop playing dumb. Do you really need me to list all the reasons?"

"Why yes, actually, I do."

"Fine!" Ginny snapped. "One: he reminds us all of Harry. Two: his owl looks like Hedwig. Three: he carries around glasses identical to Harry's. Four: the letters he has in his pocket are addressed to Harry and are from Ron and Hermione. Six: when mom told him the story about Harry's roommate he said 'it all makes sense now'. Harry had been living with him for a little bit and there must have been things his roommate was more understanding than normal about, for example Hedwig. Seven: he knew about Umbridge and her educational decrees. The eighth reason doesn't necessarily make me think that it's Harry but combined with every other clue it makes sense. He called Ron 'Ronnykins'."

"So? I called him that earlier. Midge must have just said that because I did."

"But he was using it as an insult. How would he know that that's a way to get Ron mad by just hearing you call him that once? Ron didn't have an angry reaction when you called him Ronnykins, because he's used to it from you."

"Wow. You're pretty good at detective work. Maybe you should become one. But it didn't work for you this time. For your information, Midge is a Midget at 5'4 but Harry is by no means a midget, unless he shrunk since his seventh year. He was already 6'0 at graduation"

"There are charms you can cast to make yourself shorter, as well as change your eye color, hair style and color, and there's makeup to cover up his scar. Also, I think you and George both know its Harry, and for some reason he told you not to tell. Well too bad. If he doesn't want to admit it I'll force him."

"All right then, if you're so sure it's Harry how come you were so rude and mean to him?" Fred challenged. "Correct me if I'm wrong. In your first year you had a crush on him that lasted until second year. In your sixth year, his seventh year, I believe you were both still good friends. So where did all this come from?" Ginny blushed.

"Well I was suspicious. He was acting strange and then he and Ron got into a fight."

"I see."

"And then what was up with Ron?" came Harry's voice. They turned around to see him coming across the room towards them.

"I think it was the same as Ginny," said Mrs. Weasley quietly.

"Harry. I'm so sorry," Ginny said. "Please don't be mad. It's just you were acting strange and 'Midge' was acting too much like you for me not to be suspicious, and the whole thing with Ron. I think Ron was acting like that because Fred and George's assistant was acting a lot like his ex-best friend."

"Oh Ginny I'm not so sure I can forgive you." She down at him (she was 5'6")

"What?"

"I'm just kidding!" he said gleefully.

"Harry," Mrs. Weasley suddenly broke out in tears. "I can't believe it! You're ok and you're here! But what happened? Why did you stop writing?"

"Mom calm down," George said.

"Sorry," she sniffed.

"I'll tell you and Ginny but just like Fred and George, you can't tell anyone."

"Ok," they both promised, "we won't" and so they all sat down and Harry told them his story. When he was done Mrs. Weasley burst out with fresh new tears,

"And all this time! We've been angry at you!" she sobbed.

"Mom. It's ok. He understands. Don't you Harry?" said Fred.

"Of course." Harry grinned "I would have done the same to myself if I was you." They all talked for a while longer and then Harry announced that he had to go.

"What are you talking about Harry?" George asked.

"Yeah it's not lunchtime yet!"

"What are you guys talking about?"

"Remember? You're our new assistant!"

"I thought that was a joke! I would love to but I can't stay in England."

"Exactly why you came at the perfect time! We are leaving tomorrow to open our store in America. Ginny's going to run this one while we're away. And the best part is we're going on a Muggle airplane! Dad wants to know all about them, but he's so busy he'll never get a chance to go in one so he's asked us to go via plane instead of Apparating. Anyway Apparating that far is too tiring," Fred informed him.

"So what do you say Harry?" George asked.

"Well how long are you guys going to be there?"

"Well when Ginny needs help we'll Apparate to help her. Hopefully that won't be too often. What am I saying of course it won't! Ginny's great at this! Almost as good as being a detective. Anyway we'll probably be going for a year or two. You know to get business started. Then we'll go home!"

"Well what's it gonna be Harry?" George prompted.

"Of course I'll go!"

"Excellent!" Fred and George exclaimed at the same time. "You can stay here and help out today. Tomorrow since we know nothing about Muggles, you're going to get us to the airport!"

"But I-"Suddenly Harry couldn't speak.

"Harry we can't hear please speak up," George said cupping his ear with his hand.

"You put a silencing charm on me! Even if I speak up it won't make a difference!" Harry tried to yell, but instead he ended up looking like a fish.

"Well since you've got no objections to getting us there, we should get to work." Harry scowled but his lips were twitching. Ginny was grinning, and even Mrs. Weasley was smiling.

The next day Harry, Fred, and George somehow made it on time to the airport. They had had to return to Fred and George's place five times for forgotten items, leaving almost no time at all to get Harry's things. His apartment was all dusty when they got there, and that included all his possessions that weren't in his trunk. So basically, that was his Muggle clothes (which he threw into his trunk without cleaning) Hedwig's cage, his Firebolt (which he kept as a memory of Sirius) and his Lightracer which was the newest broom out on the market. He was glad they were in first class, on the plane, because then he could pull the curtains around him, and fix up his brooms. His Invisibility Cloak, and his robes and cloaks were all in his trunk.

When they got on the plane, they all waited eagerly for take off. When they did take off, Harry noticed it was a lot like flying on a broomstick, just not as fun and you couldn't fell the air as you whipped through it. The whole plane ride, the three men polished, clipped, and cleaned their broomsticks. (Fred and George had gotten enough money to get Firebolts from a Zonko's order a long time ago). When they got to America they found the apartment they had rented, which was very close to Vertic Alley (the American Diagon Alley) where the store was. For the next two years they stayed in America just working in the shop. Fred had had to go help Ginny only once.

After two years their business was booming. Harry bought the apartment so that Fred and George could come whenever they wanted, as a gift for all they had done for him. Since he refused to take part of the money that came in, he did end up becoming a Seeker on the American team under the name Midge Moland. Finally Harry decided to reappear in public once again. George hired someone to work in their shop while they weren't there and then they went home.

When they got back everyone greeted them heartily (except for Ron since he still didn't like "Midge") and Harry changed his appearance back, and stayed in a hotel as Harry Potter, for two weeks. One day before he was due to check out, he sent the first two letters he had sent in four years, and got the first two letters he'd received in four years.

Dear Professor Dumbledore,

Can I please stay at Hogwarts for a while? Maybe even a couple of years? I know I'm probably the last person you want there right now, but I promise I'll explain everything. Please respond ASAP,

Harry

Dear Cornelius Fudge,

Four years ago my roommate, Jesse, got kidnapped by Lord Voldemort. I saved him and was captured myself but asked him not to say anything. They tortured me for two years but then Peter Pettigrew helped me escape, and killed himself. I disguised myself, and worked with some people for two more years, in America. I will not say who they were in case this letter falls in the wrong hands. Now I am back, and I need some auror work to do. If I still hold my position as an auror please assign me a case. Awaiting your response,

Harry Potter

He gave the letters to Hedwig and told her to get the answers back as soon as she could. She hooted in understanding, and flew away.

The next day:

Dear H.

We shall be happy to have you.

P.A.D

Harry smiled. He knew the letter was like that incase someone who was not meant to, got it. The other letter, from the Ministry read:

1Dear Mr. Potter,

We are assigning you to a new case. It will be a long and dangerous task which is why we have assigned two other aurors to it to work with you, one for her intelligence and one for his logic. You are assigned to this case for your dueling skills. The three of you will undoubtedly make an excellent team. What you must do will take a very long time most likely, and I am sure when you find out what it is you shall think it impossible. But almost nothing is impossible so do not give up! Your task is to find the defense for the Avada Kedavra curse. You and your fellow aurors will meet in muggle London at the Sea Dock at 3:30p.m. You will use the name Nick Jackson for your first couple of meetings. I shall inform you when you may reveal your true name. You will have as long as you need to figure this out. And yes, we are aware of the bad that can come of this as well as the good. One last reminder, don't apparate to the meeting place. Remember it is in a muggle spot. Good luck!

Sincerely,

Cornelius Fudge

Cornelius Fudge

Minister of Magic

P.s. Please come to my office at 1:00p.m today to talk about some things. You can probably guess about what