Till Death Do Us Part: Chapter 11

It seems to be a constant fight.
You fight to hold on
& then you fight to let go.

- T.J. Moore

Chapter 11: New Beginnings

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Pan's POV

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I buckled my seat belt in securely just as the plane was about to land. I gazed out at the miles and miles of deep blue water that we passed over, and the huge palm trees that gleamed in the bright sunlight.

Santa Cruz, California. The perfect place for new beginnings.

Maybe here I would be able to forget about my past. The past that had brought me so much pain, so much sorrow.

Even here, in this gorgeous place, I reminded myself that still my life was far from perfect. I still suffered from cancer, and I was still going to have a baby within eight and a half more months.

A baby that I didn't know if I would live to see or not.

I picked up the one bag I had brought with me and unboarded the plane along with the other passengers. I walked confidently out to the area marked 'Exit' and quickly caught sight of my Uncle Goten waving at me from the crowd of anxious family and friends.

"Panny!" He walked over and took a good look at me, grinning. "Is it possible you've grown even more beautiful than I last remember?"

I smiled back and gave him an awkward hug. "Uncle Goten. It's so good to see you again."

He winked at me, and I suddenly realized how much he resembled my own father. They both had the same smooth, jet black hair and dimples when they smiled. Both were lean and muscular, and I found a single tear falling out of the corner of my eye as I watched my Uncle. I missed my father so much.

Uncle Goten understood my sudden distress and patted me on my back comfortingly. "It's all right, Pan," he murmered. "It's going to be all right now."

That's when I noticed the attractive woman that stood a few feet away from him, watching our teary-eyed exchange with…what? I thought to myself. It wasn't exactly sorrow on her face. It certainly wasn't happiness either. She stared at me with a kind of skepticism.

Uncle Goten seemed to realize she was there when I stared back at her. "Oh," he said. "Pan, meet your new Aunt Bra."

I extended an arm out to her. "I'm Pan. Glad to meet you, Aunt Bra." It felt odd to call her 'Aunt Bra' when she didn't look much older than I was.

She smiled at me, and the skepticism in her eyes vanished. She's really beautiful, I found myself thinking. Her hair was long and sapphire colored, and her eyes were the deepest blue I had ever seen. And rich. I noticed she wore expensive-looking Chanel sunglasses,and several gold bracelets dangled on her arm when she extended it to shake mine in return.

But there was something about her …

Something that I couldn't quite put my finger on.

What was it?

I let it go when I realized she was speaking to me. "You don't need to call me 'aunt', Pan. I bet we're almost the same age," she paused. "It's great to meet you."

Goten and Bra were holding hands, I realized. I remembered with a pang that this was their honeymoon, after all, and I had ruined it.

"I'm really sorry about ruining your honeymoon and all," I tried to explain to my new aunt. "But I honestly had nowhere else to go. And you guys don't have to ruin your fun because of me. You can go out and do whatever, and I promise I won't get in your way."

Goten waved my comment away with his hand. "Nonsense. You're not ruining anything, Pan, and you're not a burden. You're a part of the family." He turned to Bra. "Isn't that right?"

I caught that same fleeting look in her eyes again and almost winced. I doubted she wanted me here, but was being polite for the sake of her husband. "Of course it is," she said. "And trust me, you'll love California. It might take your mind off things." She looked away.

I sent Goten a glare. He had told her everything, hadn't he? Great. No wonder she didn't like me. She probably thought I was some kind of slut.

Before I could retort, Goten quickly picked up my bags and I reluctantly followed him to the rental car. I had wanted to say something back to that Bra…but held my tongue because it would probably just make things worse.

On our way to the resort, all I could think about was my new aunt. What was she up to? 'Sincerity' obviously wasn't a word in her dictionary.

I sighed.

Only time would tell.

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Bra's POV

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Okay, so maybe I was being a little hard on the poor girl. After all, she had ruined my honeymoon. But still, I was trying so hard to make it appear as if I didn't mind…I smirked to myself. She was no fool either. I knew from the way she had looked at me that she knew. And my little comment about 'taking her mind off things' had obviously irritated her as well.

I stole a glance towards Goten. He was busy telling her something about her father that I really could care less about.

Would it be like this from now on? Me, sitting silently in the front seat while Goten and his neice chatted about all the pointless things in the world. And where was she planning to spend the nights, anyway? Our hotel living room, probably.

I frowned. Just wonderful. I couldn't even have him to myself in bed.

We were only five minutes from downtown Santa Cruz when I saw a large sign for the Chaminade, just as Goten pulled into one of the spacious parking lots.

The crisp fresh air greeted us the moment we stepped out of the car, and I was yet again awestruck by the beauty of the place. I could glimpse the beaches not far from where we stood, and the spa right across from it.

I could tell from the look on Pan's face that she was pretty amazed herself. Goten took her bags out of the car and brought them into our suite.

"Bra, is everything all right?" he whispered into my ear as soon as Pan was out of earshot. "You're okay with this whole ordeal, right?"

I smiled at him. "Of course, honey. Everything's just fine." Except for the fact that we can't have privacy any longer, I can't be alone with you, and our entire fucking honeymoon is basically ruined.

He shrugged, but didn't say anything else because Pan walked into the room.

"Well," he said,"I'm going for a walk on the beach. Anyone care to join me?"

Pan glanced at me and shook her head. "You guys go along. I'll be fine here by myself."

Happily, I grabbed my beach towel and headed out the door behind Goten, when I suddenly noticed a strange look in Pan's eyes. I stopped, wanting to say something. Those deep brown eyes of hers just looked..incredibly hurt.

"Pan, I.."

She looked away, and the moment was gone.

I shook my head as I closed the door behind me and followed Goten to the car. It was probably just my imagination, I tried to convince myself.

But why, then, did I feel so goddamn guilty?

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Pan's POV, 2 hours later

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I was alone.

Bra and Goten had headed to the beach, and in solitude I found my thoughts drifting back to Trunks. The one man I had given my heart to. The only man who had ever- no. I closed my eyes shut tightly. I would not think about him. If Trunks had decided that he did not need me anymore, then I didn't need him either.

I watched the minutes tick by.

I sighed to myself. I needed to get some fresh air and clear my head. Staying inside all day was making me feel sick.

I got dressed and prepared myself to take another lonely walk on the beach. Just as I was about to leave, however, someone knocked on the door lightly.

"Come in," I called. To my surprise, it was Bra.

She shut the door behind her and cleared her throat. "Going somewhere, Pan?"

I gave her a tight smile. "Yes. You don't have to worry about staying here with me all day."

She looked at me, bemused. "You know, Pan, I don't think we've gotten off on the right foot." When I remained silent, she continued, "Actually, I came here to talk to you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Talk to me about what? Look, I can tell you don't want me here, but like I said…I'll try not to get between you and Uncle Goten."

"No, that's not what I meant." She paused, studying my face carefully. "What I wanted to say was.." she took a deep breath. "If you ever need someone to, uh, talk to…I'm here you know."

I snorted despite the fact that a part of me was actually touched. "There's nothing to talk about."

She put a hand on my arm and gave me a half smile. "Look, Pan. You're pregnant, and I have no idea what you've been through already, but I do know that there are some things that you just can't discuss with your Uncle Goten." She shrugged and tried to look nonchalant. "And you can talk to me if you want to."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about. There isn't anything I want to 'discuss' with you. I'm perfectly fine, damn it!"

She looked at me, then, and I saw pain in her blue eyes. "I'm sorry, Pan," she whispered. "I shouldn't have come here." She stood up and headed for the door.

I surprised myself by instantly feeling regretful. I actually wanted her to stay. Why, suddenly, did I feel as if I couldn't carry this burden any longer? I ached to tell someone, anyone, the truth of that night. I wanted a woman to talk to, I realized with a pang, because only a woman could understand my feelings and emotions and what I was going through.

I felt a single tear roll down my cheek.

"Wait, Bra." I sighed and collapsed into the nearest chair, suddenly feeling incredibly tired and worn out. I was so sick of fighting this never ending battle. I looked at her in the eye. "Maybe we do need to talk after all."

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A/N: Okay, I know that was really short, but I decided to post it anyway because I figured a small update was better than no update. And for those fact-obsessed people, yes there is actually a resort named the Chaminade in Santa Cruz, California. ;p Please review.