Thank you so much for the reviews so far. They've kept me going! Ooh, and for everyone who wanted a conversation, I put one in here for you…
This chapter written with the assistance of the following wonderful songs;
Insomnia by Electric President
John Wayne Gacy Jr by Sufjan Stevens
Suffering by The Beautiful Girls
If you can listen to any or all of these while you're reading, please do. It'll give you an idea of how I was feeling. Enjoy- and keep those reviews coming please xx.
Kirsten's phone beeped irritatingly enough at her to permeate her sleep. She sighed, reached for it, remembered she'd left it in her bag last night, too tired to put it next to her bed. Beside her, Sandy stirred as she got up, pushing her hair back, to find exactly where she'd dropped her bag. It had been another long function night, a party where she and Sandy had stood together, smiled, drank tonic water with lime and avoided questions with the word rehab in it. She knew it was going to take a while for the gossip to die down, hadn't expected any less from the people in Newport, but was surprised about the amount of support she'd received from the Newpsies. No doubt they were going to be gossiping about her today, wondering if they'd seen her with a drink in her hand at all, recapping the funeral disaster as she'd smashed a vodka bottle and yelled at Sandy, viciously negating blame for her downfall, but last night they were a disturbing flock of sympathy and support. She'd already missed several Newpsie meetings, had assumed that, as well as Suriak, would have made her an outcast, but she'd underestimated their willpower when it came to saving their own.
Kirsten flipped the phone open, dialled her message bank number and listened to a second of stifled breathing before the caller hung up. She'd been getting these calls more recently, had assumed it was a wrong number at first but it had been happening too much for this to be true. She deleted the message, checked the time. It was ten to six, early enough to get ready for the day. Kirsten set her phone down beside the bed while she went into the kitchen to make herself coffee.
It rang while she was gone, and in his half asleep state, Sandy reached out at it. He squinted blearily at the number- private, before flipping it open. Who the hell rang this early?
"'Lo." He mumbled. There was silence on the other end, a kind of quickened breathing to let him know that there was line was still open. As abruptly as it had started, the caller hung up. Sandy clicked the phone shut, looking at it. He immediately thought of the transgressions that Kirsten had denied, with Jimmy and, more recently, Carter. He'd always trusted her, but since she'd seemed so defensive about Carter, he'd had the first few seeds of doubt planted in his mind. He vaguely looked for Kirsten before realising she couldn't be there, otherwise he wouldn't have been able to reach her bedside table without encountering her sleeping form. He rubbed his eyes, yawned, swung his legs around to the side of the bed. He sauntered through to the kitchen, following the sound of movement. He loved morning stillness, the feeling in the air, anticipation for a day just begun. He would usually be out surfing, but had heard the report for waves wasn't great, so had decided to stay at home with Kirsten.
"Morning." He said when he came into the kitchen. She was standing by the sink, looking over the pool to the view beyond, pale in the morning light. She turned round, smiled at him, her hair still loose and bed wild. She looked young in the mornings, before she'd applied her makeup, while she was still sleep rumpled, before the day had taken its toll on her. Sandy crossed the last few steps to her, wrapped his arms around her as she turned back to the window, landed a kiss, through her hair, on the back of her neck. He was taking notice of her more since Suriak, aware that every moment they spent together was important, that it was a moment less apart. She was more like the woman he had fallen in love with, filled with hope and laughter. They'd lost the laughter for a long time, had only just managed to recapture it.
"You got a phone call." Sandy said, leaning closer to her. She was so much thinner than she had been, her hands, over his as they lay on her stomach, seemed smaller.
"Hmmm." Kirsten said.
"A heavy breather." Sandy continued. Kirsten sighed, knew he would immediately be thinking the worse, running Carter and Jimmy through his head, wondering about an affair. He waited through her silence, before nuzzling her neck. Kirsten debated about telling him about the voice mail she'd been receiving for a month.
"Actually, it's been happening a lot. Usually on my voice mail. Just breathing on the phone, then they hang up. I thought it was a wrong number at first, but…" Kirsten trailed off, not wanting to list any other possibilities. Sandy turned her around, looked into her eyes. She was relieved to see only over protection, initiated by love.
"Have you told anyone?" Sandy asked. Kirsten knew she must look confused, wondering what he meant.
"The police." Sandy clarified. Kirsten shook her head, wondering what the police could do.
"No, I didn't think there was any need. It's not like it's threatening… It's just breathing." Kirsten shrugged, wanting Sandy to dismiss it as something trivial, as she had done. She reached into the cupboard to get a mug so she could pour Sandy's coffee before taking hers and moving to the table.
"Honey, how long has this been going on?" Sandy followed her, obviously not able to let the issue drop.
"About a month or so… Maybe less. It's not a big deal." She caught his eye. "Really." She added, letting him know she was finished talking about it. He looked back at her, and she knew he wasn't happy with the outcome, but also knew he couldn't push it any further.
"And if you get one of your friends to bug my phone, or whatever it is they do…" Kirsten trailed off, tried her best to look menacingly at Sandy as Seth entered the room.
"Whoah, Dad, bugging the phone. How very Mission Impossible of you." Seth went straight for the cereal cupboard, pulled out his favourite and started to eat straight from the box.
"Seth, other people have to eat out of that, use a bowl." Kirsten said to him. She loved the normalcy that she had always taken for granted. Moments like these, almost mundane in their simplicity, never failed to remind her how lucky she was to be back home, wrapped in the folds of their family. Ryan entered the kitchen, went straight for coffee.
"Just tell me if it keeps happening, okay?" Sandy gave her a kiss on the forehead as he headed to shower before he went to work. Kirsten nodded, watched him walk out, reminded again of how much she loved that man, putting the phone calls out of her mind.