Thank you to all who continue to review! You guys rock! I've had several people ask why Sara hasn't gone to see Greg yet… and the best answer I can give is that I haven't gotten to that chapter yet. I promise that she will go to see him soon (the chapter after next). I had planned on it being earlier in the story, but the chapters ended up longer than I had anticipated, so it got pushed back.
As for updates, I start finals next week and the next chapter isn't finished yet, so it may be a couple weeks before I update again. Please bear with me!
Warning: On top of the angst of Greg's conditions, this chapter has some good, old-fashioned, Sara/Grissom angst. Aren't I evil?

Chapter Six

Sara sighed as she scanned a list of files on the computer screen. She'd been working at the computer for over an hour and had so far found nothing useful. The victim seemed to be a computer packrat, saving everything. She had not started sifting through the e-mails, noticing that the messages went back almost two years- while this increased her chances of finding something useful, it would be a time-consuming and she currently lacked the energy for such an undertaking.

Once again, it was one of those nights when the lab was oddly quiet, with only a few random techs and officers wandering past the room occasionally. Warrick had stopped by briefly to check on her, but other then that, she had been left alone to work. However, as she glanced through a list of files labeled 'fishing trip', Sara sensed someone watching her from the doorway.

Resisting the urge to look up, she continued working. She knew if she did look up, whoever it was would just ask questions, or want to talk, and she was tired of questions to which she knew no answers and talk that brought her no comfort.

Continuing on with her work, she heard soft footsteps come up behind and the gentle cough of someone subtly trying to gain her attention.

Sighing internally, she finally looked up and was surprised to find Conrad Ecklie standing beside her.

"Sorry to bother you." He said with honesty that amazed Sara. "What are you working on?"

"Looking for anything that could point to a motive- you know, e-mail threats, a blackmail list…"

"Find anything?"

"Not so far." She replied with defeated shrug.

Ecklie nodded slowly. He opened his mouth to speak, but stopped. He did this several times before words finally were spoken.

"I know you might not believe me, but I'm sorry about what happened out there. I'm glad you weren't hurt and I hope Sanders pulls through this."

"Thanks." She looked up and gave him a small, sad, smile. "I do believe you."

"I appreciate that." He shifted uncertainly. "If you need to take any time off, you know you can, right?"

"Yeah. I don't need time right now, though."

"I understand. You'd rather be here- that's fine. Just know if you need anything, say so."

"Okay." She nodded and watched as he started to walk away.

Stopping about halfway to the door, he turned back to her. "Sara, if anyone can find out who did this, it's you and the others. This is the best lab in the country, it won't let down one of it's own." Ecklie nodded understandingly before leaving.

Once he was gone, Sara turned back to the computer, and with newfound energy, began the daunting task of searching through e-mails.

Several hours later, Sara wandered down the lab hallway to Grissom's office, a file folder in hand. Knocking softly on the door as she entered, she found the supervisor alone at his desk.

"How are you, Sara?" He looked up at her as she came toward him.

"Alright. How about you?"

"I'm okay." Grissom nodded slowly.

"How's the case?" Sara asked hesitantly.

"We don't have much." He admitted, glancing down at his desk to avoid her eyes. "How about yours? Find anything useful?"
"The vic was being blackmailed."

"That's good." He gave a wry smile, seeing Sara's confused expression. "For the case, not for him."

She didn't smile in return. "Brass is trying to locate the PO box the blackmailer used. That's our best lead at the moment."

"That's a difficult lead- it could make the case or it could just run you in circles."

"Running in circles would still be better then doing nothing."

Grissom studied her silently. No matter how uncaring anyone though his heart might be, it was aching for the sadness he saw staring back at him. He wanted nothing more then to take her in his arms and tell her that everything would be okay, but he remained in his chair, watching her.

"You would think, after all these years, I wouldn't be surprised at how fast life can change." Sara said suddenly, breaking the silence. "One minute, we've got everything, and then, in one instant, we can lose it."

"You haven't lost anything, yet."

If she heard him, she didn't acknowledge it. Staring thoughtfully off into a corner of the office, she continued softly. "I was so afraid to love again, to give someone my heart. I've been hurt so many times by people I thought I loved… I pushed him away for so long… Then one day, I'm alone in my apartment and I realize how miserable I really am. I hate being alone- I was alone for too long. And then, I thought, maybe it'd be worth it." She paused, blinking back a tear. "Maybe it'd be worth the risk of being hurt. There was just this… draw… to him- I couldn't ignore it. So, I took the risk- I stopped pushing him away and stopped trying to deny what I felt. I fell in love, and, for the first time, someone loved me back. There was no pain… we were happy."

Grissom opened his mouth to speak, but found that no words came to him immediately. He slowly shook his head, an expression of grief on his aged features.

Snapping out of her thoughtful trance, she turned to Grissom, shaking her head rapidly. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have… I don't know why I just said all that." She babbled quickly, like she had done so many times before, as she turned to leave.

"Sara, stay." He commanded gently. "Please, don't walk away- I've let you do that too many times."

Turning back around, she stared at him warily from across the desk.

"Sara…" Grissom gave a sigh, taking off his glasses as he leaned toward her. "I know the last few years may not have worked out the way you planned them, but it will all work out in the end."

She looked at him, her expression so sad and broken that he had to look away. "How does Greg dying 'work out in the end'?"

He flinched at the bluntness of her question, continuing to stare blankly at his desk to avoid her gaze. "He's not dead, Sara. He can still pull through this."

"I wish I could believe that, I really wish I could, but a part of me refuses to. I've seen so many people die… I'm afraid I've lost the innocence to believe that it will all just be okay…" She gazed down at the file in her hand. "I don't want Greg to die- I don't know if I can bear to watch him die. But the worst part is, I don't why this happening. I just want to know why I can't seem to hold on to anything I love…" Sara dropped her head down, her hair falling across her face.

Finally looking up, he stood slowly- coming around his desk toward her. He did not need to see her face to know that she was holding back tears. Reaching out, he laid a hand on her arm.

"I don't think there is an answer." Grissom told her softly. "I have no answer, Sara."

"I don't either…" She replied quietly, distantly. "I just wanted to be happy. Was that too much to hope for?" She glanced up at him, eyes still shining with tears.

"No. You deserve to be happy." He gave her a small smile, brushing a strand of hair from her cheek.

Sara managed a meek smile back. "Thank you, Grissom- I know this isn't easy on either of us."

"It's much harder on you. I know how hard it is to try to come to terms with losing someone you love."

"You do?"

"I was twenty-five. I lost a very close friend of mine..." His voice was laced with sorrow as he looked at her.

"How did you cope with that?"

"I lost myself into my work." Grissom gave a sad smile. "To this day, I'm not sure if that was the right decision to make. I've lost many things due to that choice." He met her eyes. "But it was different then. You have people here to help you through this."

"You?"

He nodded. "Me. And Nick, and Warrick- even Catherine." Grissom watched her for a moment before speaking again. "Promise me something, Sara."

"What?"

"I need you to stay strong, no matter what happens to Greg…" He paused thoughtfully. "You may never have been mine to lose, but, all the same, I can't lose you, Sara. Promise me you'll be strong."

"I promise you that I'll try." Sara gave a sad laugh. "Is that enough?"

"I suppose it will have to do."

"Will you promise me something?"

He nodded.

"Promise me that my relationship with Greg isn't going to change anything between us. I'm still gonna need you as a friend and as a boss- you're an important part of my life, Gris."

"And you're a very important part of mine, Sara. That won't change, I promise." Despite his words, he could not help but feel they were saying some kind of strange goodbye. He realized that the words they had just exchanged marked an end to many years of unrequited feelings and heartbreaks, but at the same time, it was the beginning of a new chapter in their relationship- hopefully a better one.

Sara started slightly as her cell phone broke the silence of the office. She wiped away the remainder of a tear as she answered it. "Sidle."

Grissom watched her expression as she listened to whoever it was that had called- her face betraying no emotion, save the sadness in her eyes that had seemed unyielding in the last twenty-four hours.

"Alright, I'll meet you out front." Sara nodded slowly, and then shut her phone. "That was Brass. I need to go."

A dozen thoughts whirled around his mind- all things he should say before Sara walked away, but he couldn't sort any one thing out properly. Instead, he said softly, "Good luck."

"Thanks." She gave Grissom a small smile. "I'll see you later."

He watched as she turned and walked out of his office, leaving him alone once more.

To be continued...